[Friday, After the sports festival]"You know… I thought that after it all that it would be easy… I thought that when she rejected me again I"d be able to move on… I was stupid to keep trying… this isn"t some love story… life isn"t like it is in books."
"Alright, Simon," Claire said standing. "Let"s keep it light. No need to kill yourself."
"Sorry…"
The festival had ended. It ended with different emotions for different people. Those who were sad, those who were happy and those who were contempt. Simon sat in the centre of the field with the setting sun behind him, waiting for the others to finish packing everything away. He spread himself out across the field like a starfish that was washed up and had attached itself to a rock. This starfish was expecting to die on this rock.
"You can stay like that all day and nothing will change," Claire said looking at him.
"I don"t expect it to," Simon said. "I"m just relaxing, nothing more."
"Right," Claire awkwardly stood above him unsure of what to do. She had previously stood up in hopes she"d be able to get Simon to stand up with her. Her plan didn"t work and now she had to sit back down again, hoping it wasn"t awkward and Simon didn"t notice.
"You don"t have to stay here. You can go home if you want," Simon said to Claire who had just sat down and was visibly frustrated that she would have to stand up again to leave.
"No!" She said giving in. "I"ve sat down! So I"ll stay down!"
"Joining me down here... in the bottom… smart move."
Pessimistic Simon was almost a contender for the most pessimistic character in this novel. If it wasn"t for the lack of pessimism recently he wouldn"t be in the running. The average depression has gone down over the chapters.
"So what"s next?" Claire asked.
"I think we wait for them to finish."
"Not them," Claire said hitting Simon in the face with her bag. "I"m talking about you."
"Oh, I guess, I don"t know. I just wish I knew what was wrong with me."
Claire sat and listen to Simon beat himself up for some time. Anyone would hate to hear their friends insult themselves especially when it"s someone you care about.
"It"s not you," Claire said. "Kaylee told you that it was all her. It"s her fault for leading you on. You didn"t know better."
"Don"t say that," Simon said to Claire"s surprise. "It"s not Kaylee"s fault."
"What?!" Claire was once again stood up but this time seemed as if it was going to stay this way. "How can you defend her in this situation? She just rejected you for like the 5th time! She told you she was leading you on! How depressed can you possibly be to find a reason to beat yourself up in a situation like this? You are putting Owen to shame! You need to get up and move on. Who gives a s.h.i.t about how she feels. The same thing happened to Ethan so get up and live with it. At least he isn"t lying in the middle of some field where his ex once sat."
What Claire said was correct. Simon was aware of that. Sometimes, it"s not easy moving on. Breakups are hard for both parties, even if it"s mutual. No one can expect a breakup and no one wants to expect it.
"What should I do then?" Simon asked sitting up and looking at the school in the distance.
"Stop being a p.u.s.s.y," Claire said dropping her bag on Simon. "Get up and forget about her. You two will stay friends but it"s not like you will never see her again."
"That"s what makes it awkward," Simon said as his head fell into his hands.
"Oh, yeah, I guess you are right."
Seeing an ex can cause problems. Some people can stay on good terms with their ex, or at least, that is what they say when they first break up. Some people need time away from their ex after a breakup to deal with things their own way. Even if that way is stuffing your face with ice cream whilst crying to sad songs, it would be better than talking to your ex.
"Why don"t you just hang out with other people?" Claire suggested.
"Like who?"
"Well… er… me?" She said pointing to herself like an idiot who wanted this outcome from the beginning.
"What? I thought you still hated me for before."
"Oh come on," Claire said slapping Simon"s back. "That was years ago. So long as it doesn"t happen again I"ll be fine! Hahaha…"
Despite laughing about the situation, Simon felt a sense of unease about Claire"s laugh, as if it was there to hide the true intention she had towards him. Whatever that was he was no terrified and could only laugh awkwardly at the situation.
"Haha… thanks." Simon said.
"For what? I haven"t done anything."
"Just trying to cheer me up. Reminds me of the past."
"Ew, you"ve gotten all soppy."
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The relationship between these two was strange. Potentially, stranger than Simon and Kaylee, but to make a judgement on the human heart can be a rather rash one if you don"t know anything. You can judge someone who loves someone but you can"t explain the reasons as to why they fall in love with someone.
So let"s take it back. Back a few years to an event, where Simon first met Kaylee.