"I still love you."
That"s when he unfurled all that coiled male need. Pounding into her like a battering ram.
Oh how she"d missed this. Carson"s s.e.xual energy unleashed on her. His breath hot in her ear, his whiskey-rough voice telling her how good her p.u.s.s.y felt. His hand kneading her breast and one squeezing her hip. His mouth on the nape of her neck sending every fine hair on end with deceptively gentle kisses.
He knew what got to her. Knew how to propel her to the edge where she teetered precariously. Where one nudge would send her soaring into pleasure.
"One more, sugar. Give it to me."
Then he pulled out and followed the seam of her s.e.x with the broad tip of his c.o.c.k. His hand slid down to hold the thick head against her c.l.i.t. Every pump of his hips sent the rim rubbing against that swollen nub exactly where she needed it. Faster and faster until that dizzying sensation coalesced, spinning her into orbit in a hot throbbing rush. His mouth caught hers in a brutal kiss as he m.u.f.fled her cries. As she came back down, she feared her legs would give out.
"I"ve got you, beautiful. I"ve always got you."
He pushed his c.o.c.k back through her plumped folds and he reentered her in one deep thrust that caused her c.l.i.t to spasm one more time.
The long strokes became short jabs. There was no warning besides a groaned, "f.u.c.k," and Carson"s deep rumble in her ear as his o.r.g.a.s.m overtook him.
She clamped her inner muscles down on his shaft and felt every scalding spurt of his seed. Every hard pulse.
But there were no sweet kisses or tender moments in the aftermath. The front door slammed against the building and people started streaming out.
Carson had her skirt down and her panties back in place. He turned her around and said, "Your shirt," while he zipped and buckled. He reached down to retrieve his hat.
When he realized she hadn"t started to fix her clothing, he offered her a soft smile. "Fl.u.s.tered ya, didn"t I?" Then he tackled the snaps on her shirt himself.
Such a sweet man; sometimes she forgot how much she needed that tender care from him. "You always fl.u.s.ter me when you put your hands on me. You have since that first time."
Their eyes met.
"Let"s go home and I"ll put my hands on you some more."
As they crossed the parking lot, she said, "How much whiskey did you have tonight?"
"A lot. Then I went completely stone cold sober the instant I saw you."
"I imagine your wife going on a rampage in your favorite watering hole will do that to you." She stopped. "You do realize us banging against the side of a honkytonk doesn"t change the fact that we have a lot to talk about?"
"Yeah." He smirked. "But I love me some hot makeup s.e.x. And that you demanded it from me? Made it even better, sugar."
"And don"t you forget it. Get in the car."
"I"m fine to drive my truck."
Carolyn shook her head and pointed at the pa.s.senger side. He looked about to argue, but thought better of it and climbed in.
On the way home the silence between them was especially awkward. Carolyn kept both hands on the steering wheel and her eyes on the road. In her peripheral vision she saw him gazing out the window, his face unreadable. When she dropped her right hand on the seat, Carson immediately picked it up, kissed her knuckles and kept hold of it.
Oh, troubled man of mine, what"s going through that brain of yours?
Carson seemed surprised when they pulled up to the trailer. "Aren"t we stoppin" to get the boys?"
"And wake Cal and Kimi when they were nice enough to take them at a moment"s notice? No. I"ll send you over to get them in the morning so you can properly apologize to my sister and your brother for being an inconsiderate jacka.s.s and thank them for taking care of our sons."
"Caro-"
"I don"t want to hear it. Right now I want you to pull your jeans and your boxers down to your knees."
He lifted that one, s.e.xy eyebrow. "Why? You gonna spank me?"
"You"d deserve it. Drop your drawers, sugar, I ain"t gonna ask again," she mimicked in his cowboy drawl.
"This mean and nasty streak from that sugar sweet mouth of yours is givin" me wood," he said as he unbuckled his belt and tugged his clothing down to the tops of his boots.
"Undo all the snaps on your shirt and spread your thighs as wide as the seat." She held her hand up. "And no, you don"t get to ask questions. Just do what you"re told."
"Yes, ma"am."
He hadn"t been kidding about getting hard again. She twisted sideways in her seat, rising onto her knees, bracing one hand on his thigh and the other on his rock-hard abdomen. She sucked his shaft to the root, loving the musky scent of his pubic hair and the taste of her s.e.x juices mixed with his as she held him deep in her throat.
"Jesus Christ, Carolyn!"
She sank her teeth down, showing her displeasure at his choice of words.
"s.h.i.t. Sorry. But d.a.m.n, woman, I wasn"t expectin" that."
She couldn"t help but smile as she started to work him over. Using her teeth, her tongue, her wet mouth to make him groan, to make him sweat.
To make him beg.
Carolyn reached between his legs to fondle his b.a.l.l.s. Then she brought them up and sucked on them. One at a time, then together, letting her face rub on the side of his shaft.
His belly rippled and she felt his legs quivering.
She licked up the front side of his c.o.c.k, flicking her tongue around the rim but not in the spot he wanted. She delved her tongue into the slit, lapping up his taste.
Carson gently pushed her hair over her shoulder so he could watch her.
Then she showed him all her pa.s.sion and skill, but no mercy. She started a rhythm with long, deep strokes and gradually quickened her pace so her mouth only slid halfway down. Sucking. Swirling her tongue around the head then back to that fast movement in and out of her mouth. No hands, just her lips and teeth and tongue and hard suctioning power to drive him to that pinnacle of pleasure.
His hands landed on her head, grasping handfuls of her hair as his hips bucked up. A stream of muttered curses rent the air.
Carolyn lowered her mouth to the root again, deep throating him, swallowing around the head of his c.o.c.k as he started to come. She slid back to the tip and sucked the last spurt, needing the familiar taste of him on her tongue.
She kissed her way up his torso, smiling at how hard his lungs labored and how fast his heart raced. She loved to nuzzle and stroke him after a b.l.o.w.j.o.b, but this time she gripped his chin, forcing his attention to her. "Carson."
"Hang on. Lemme get my head unscrambled."
"No. Look at me. Now."
Those beautiful dazed blue eyes opened.
She grabbed his softening c.o.c.k and lightly squeezed. "Who does this belong to?"
"You."
"And who am I?"
"My wife."
She inched closer to him. "Remember that the next time floozies are sniffing around you. Remember who f.u.c.ked you outside a bar. Remember who sucked you off in her car. Remember that you"ll never find a woman who gives you what I do in and out of bed. Remember you"re mine and I take care of what"s mine. But if you ever f.u.c.k around on me I will cut off your c.o.c.k and wear it as a necklace." She smashed her mouth to his, her kiss brutal. Relentless.
Carson"s rough-tipped fingers tenderly caressed her cheeks, her throat, drawing her out of the place where she had something to prove.
His gentleness was her undoing. His mouth moved over hers sweetly as he whispered promises against her lips. "I love you more than life itself. You don"t ever have to worry that I"ll stray. You own me; heart, soul, mind, body and c.o.c.k. Forever."
"Good. Come on, let"s go inside."
He walked behind her. When she slipped the key in the lock, he kissed the back of her neck. "Need you. Skin to skin. Slow and sweet."
Turned out she needed that too.
Afterward, they were spooned together on the couch, her back to his front. "That was...like it always used to be between us."
Carson kissed the ball of her shoulder. "Yep." He stopped idly stroking her nipple to spread his hand out on her belly.
Somehow her earlier self-a.s.surance that she hadn"t started showing yet was a lie. She had a fairly substantial pooch.
"Carson?"
"Mmm?"
"I"m pregnant again."
"I know you are."
Carolyn turned toward him. "How?"
He kissed her nose. "We"ve been through this twice before, so I recognized the signs. I"m bettin" it happened that night...?"
"During calving when you were nearly frozen solid and I used blankets and body heat to get you warmed up."
"You got me downright hot. Three times if I recall correctly."
"Four if you count the b.l.o.w.j.o.b."
He laughed. "Of course it counts. Speaking of...you sucking me off in the car pretty much blew my mind."
"Been a while since I"ve done that. It"s a little hard to do with the boys along." Her smile faded. "You okay about the baby?"
"Completely okay. So that makes you..."
"About four months along. I"ve been holding off going to the doctor."
"Why?"
She shrugged. "Like you said. I"ve been down this road twice."
Carson became quiet and she knew he didn"t buy her reasoning. Finally he said, "You"re not goin" because of money."
"It"s not a big deal. By the time I"m closer to delivery and I need to see the doctor you"ll have sent the cattle to market and we will have the money."
"You have no idea how much this eats at me."
"What?"
"Bein" a s.h.i.tty provider for my family because the cattle business is a d.a.m.n c.r.a.pshoot on a good year. Christ. I can"t afford to get you the proper medical care. We"re still livin" hand to mouth and in this cramped d.a.m.n trailer. Happy as I am that we"re adding to our family, where are we gonna put another kid?"
Carolyn rolled to face him. She searched his eyes and saw such guilt and shame. "Carson. Sweetheart. What"s going on? You"re never so negative about ranching."
"Maybe it"s never seemed this dire before."
"Is that why you"ve been drinking?"
"Yeah. As much as I know it don"t help, it dulled that panicked feeling."
"How long have you been panicked?"
"Since the cattle sale last year barely covered our yearly operating expenses."
She pressed her palm over his heart. "Why didn"t you say anything to me?"
"Because it"s my job to worry about money, not yours."
"There"s your problem. It"s not a you thing or a me thing, but an us thing. We"ve been down this keeping secrets road before and it didn"t go well for us, remember?"
He kissed her furrowed brow. "I don"t know how the h.e.l.l I forgot."
"So talk to me."
"Dad is still expanding the ranch, which is good in theory, but in reality, it don"t make sense to buy land when it"ll sit unused because we can"t afford to buy extra cattle. Not only that, we don"t have the manpower to run more livestock. Cal and Charlie are good workers. Casper sucks most days. Dad ain"t as spry as he used to be. And I can"t work anymore than I already am."
Some of what he was saying made sense; some didn"t. Carolyn decided right then she needed to be more involved with the ins and outs of the cattle business.
"To make matters worse, whenever I question him, he reminds me the name on the land deed was his and the decisions about the ranch are still his. I"ve been thinking if I"m ready to pop my old man in the mouth every day, if maybe it"s time to go."
"Go?"
Carson tucked her hair behind her ear. "Sometimes I wonder what it"d be like just to pack up and go somewhere else. Be someone else."