Tynan"s scent was earthier, like the warm spiciness of cardamom wrapped with a note of sandalwood and a dash of laundry softener. He was raw s.e.x and home sweet home wrapped up in one yummy, mouthwatering smell. She wanted to press her nose up against his chest and breathe him in. Wait, what? No, no she didn"t.
Except she did. She really, really did. And she didn"t know what to do with that impulse. Her new awareness of him scared her. She tried to tell herself it was just because he was so large and imposing. But the way his gaze made parts of her body tingle and melt revealed the naked truth. She was physically turned on by Tynan Cates. Ugh. That wasn"t a situation she could let stand.
Her only saving grace was that it appeared the feeling wasn"t reciprocated. She apparently did nothing for the man. Hallelujah! He"d made that obvious from day one. Heck, not a surprise either. She wasn"t femme fatale material. What did Tynan call her? Tink. So, an angry pixie. Yeah, sadly, true. At five-three-okay, fine, almost five-three-no chest to speak of, and eyes almost too large for her face, she couldn"t be a Victoria"s Secret model if she tried. She"d heard all the pixie and Disney Princess jokes. To be honest, she"d never minded because she"d known Joe loved her. He had never made her feel less than. With Joe, her lack of height, hips, and bust line had never been something she"d worried about.
"Let me help you with that."
Lu jumped when Tynan spoke from close behind her. Man, for a big man he had quiet footsteps.
His arms reached over her head to pry out a hidden nail at the top, keeping the two-by-four stuck. When he leaned forward to tug, the heat from his body wrapped around her. It was like being surrounded by a stone wall warmed from the sun.
"Okay, go ahead and pull."
She couldn"t even think with him lined up behind her. Spinning around to face him, she leaned against the piece of wood. The two-by-four. Her eyes stared into his chest. And oh lord, his scent teased her until she was close to leaning in and rubbing her whole body against him like a frisky cat. "P-pull what?"
"Oh, lady, you don"t want to start this." His voice came out low and gravely, almost like a growl.
Her eyes slowly rose up his chest, over his powerful shoulders, up his thick neck to his clenched jaw. He hadn"t shaved in a few days and he looked rough and hard-edged. Her gaze fused with his, sucked up like a magnet by those eyes. Those eyes made her wish she could lock her thoughts behind a steel wall. His gaze held her captive. Bound and laid bare. Lord, please don"t let him be able to read minds.
"I know. I really, really don"t." She shook her head, but her hand moved of its own accord up to touch the hard muscles of his chest. Surely she meant to press him away, only her hand caressed him instead. Back and forth, as her body leaned forward into his heat before she caught herself and jerked back, pulling her hands into her body. "I guess this happens to you all the time, huh?"
Tynan looked down at her and shook his head slowly. "Nope. Can"t say that it does. Probably it"s just curiosity, or a case of opposites attracting. Let"s go. One kiss to get it out of your system so we can focus on the job again. You know, the one I"m paying you for."
"A kiss? To get this curiosity out of my system?" She nodded while her insides quivered. Oh, holy c.r.a.p. Wait. She hadn"t kissed anyone but Joe since before ninth grade. That was ten years ago. Joe"s lips had been the last to touch hers. Oh G.o.d, she really didn"t want to ruin that, but that was so twisted, right? She almost had to kiss this man to get past that or she"d be some crazy, unkissed woman for the rest of her life. "Yes, I think we should just do it. Go ahead. Lay it on me. Quick."
Lu closed her eyes to block out that it wasn"t Joe, puckered up, and waited. Nothing happened. She cracked open one eye, then both, looking up to see what was taking him so long.
"No, I don"t think so." He stood with his arms crossed, almost daring her from high above. "You started this when you checked out my a.s.s last week. And you started it just now. It"s your move."
Oh lord. She couldn"t do this. Although . . . the man didn"t find her s.e.xually attractive at all. What safer guy could there be to have her first kiss in over three years with? This was good. Great, even. Ha! Talk about no pressure. All she had to do was kiss him and that would be the end of it.
"Fine." She stepped forward into his heat and realized the first problem. Without his help, she"d have to climb him like a koala in a tree to reach his lips. "Wait. Stay right there."
Over in the corner was a tub of drywall mud. It was about twelve inches high, so she dragged it over along the ground-hey, it was heavy!-right in front of Tynan. She accidentally swung it onto his toes first. Thankfully, his steel-toed boots protected him from damage. He grimaced. Most of the damage. She stood on top of the tub, which brought her up almost even with him.
She looked into his eyes and lost her breath. "Whoa. This is why I don"t do heights. You have less oxygen up here."
He had lowered his arms from across his chest, waiting for her to make her move.
Oh boy; it felt as if she"d forgotten how to kiss. And where to start, where to place her hands, how to move her lips once she placed them against his. Just pucker up and kiss.
Pucker and kiss. Pucker and kiss. She nodded to herself, ignoring Tynan"s raised eyebrow, and leaned forward. Okay, maybe threw herself forward is more like what happened, and she sort of smacked her mouth into his. Ouch. Their noses. .h.i.t, too, and not in a Tom Hanks-Meg Ryan romantic comedy kind of way. Ow! "Sorry! I"m sorry. I had too much momentum. Let me try again."
"You know what?" Tynan backed up a step. And then another even bigger step away, his arms raised in surrender. "Never mind. I"m good."
"Oh yeah. You"re probably right. That . . . that was . . . you know, my bad. Sorry. Sure I get it. That"s probably a good idea." It was like a strong wind had blown through her emotions and left her a tangled-up mess of relief, embarra.s.sment, and s.e.xual frustration. "It"s good to have a hands-off policy. No fraternization. I mean, that would be like a CEO messing with his secretary on his desk, right? Everyone knows that"s a bad idea."
He nodded slowly, as if he was reconsidering the situation. "Right."
"Woo, that was a close call." She rubbed her nose where she"d hit it against Tynan"s, then jumped down off the bucket and became superefficient and hyperfocused on her work for the first time since Tynan had hired her.
d.a.m.n, the woman made him crazy. He lost his mind around her, but maybe that was because he couldn"t get rid of his whatever it was-attraction, chemistry, obsession-the way he would have in the past. By taking the woman to bed and having a mutually hot, satisfying fling until it flamed out. His decision to take a break from relationships had been a whole lot easier before Lu had crashed into his world. She was a human buzzsaw in his carefully constructed life.
One kiss to get it out of your system. How stupid was that? He"d had some stupid ideas before, but that one was up near the top. His only excuse was that the touch of her hands on his chest had scrambled his brain. Then, when she"d stepped up to near eye level, he"d fallen into her mysterious brown eyes without a thought of stopping himself. Her sweet scent, today vanilla and lemons, had wrapped around him like a rope and reeled him in.
When his phone rang he jumped to answer it. It was a perfect excuse to get the h.e.l.l away from Lu. He walked to the far side of the lobby and looked out the window toward the street to take the call. Well, d.a.m.n. Houdini and the cat his dog had brought home yesterday were sitting out front on the sidewalk staring in.
"Yeah?"
"h.e.l.lo to you too, Ty."
He winced at the tone in Quinn"s voice. "Sorry. You just called at a bad time. What"s up?"
"I wanted a favor, but if this is a bad time, I"ll just call-nope, I can"t call another brother. You"re my only brother who knows how to play lacrosse. I promised Henry Lee I would help coach his lacrosse team. Today"s the first practice, but I just got called to an accident scene over on Highway 29."
He moved to stand in the open doorway and watched his dog and cat walk toward him. He"d have to leave anyway to deal with his pets, so what the heck? It would also give him some much-needed s.p.a.ce away from Lu.
"It"s only for forty-five minutes," Quinn added. "It"s a bunch of six-year-old beginners. They"re just learning stick skills. You"ll probably spend most of the time telling them not to smack each other on their helmets."
"Okay, sure. But I have to run my dog home again first." Houdini now sat in the doorway, his tail wagging against the ground in nervous, frantic swishes. The cat sat beside him, looking bored.
"Just take him with you. If you teach him to fetch lacrosse b.a.l.l.s, we"ll let him be the team mascot."
"Right. Okay, but you owe me one."
"You bet."
As he hung up, Lu walked over next to him.
"What a sweet dog. Is he yours?" She squatted down and held her hand out to Houdini.
Houdini graced her with a disdainful look and turned his head away in rejection. His shy, attention-loving dog, who until this very moment had loved every stranger he"d met, ignored her. The cat gave her a hiss, too, before skittering next to Houdini.
Lu stood up and took a step back, tucking her hands into her overall pockets. "I don"t think your dog likes me. And your cat isn"t a fan either."
Yeah, it sure didn"t look like it. Maybe they sensed his tension around Lu. "So not everyone falls for your pixie magic like the whole crew did. You"ll live."
"Sure." She shrugged and wandered back to knock out the stud she"d been working on.
Tynan gave the keys to Cash to lock up, lifted his animals into his truck, and drove over to the elementary school. The group of boys was already gathered on the field, with a few parents sitting in folding sports chairs along the edge. He rolled the truck windows all the way down and commanded Houdini and the cat to stay in the truck.
A high school kid jogged over with a bag of b.a.l.l.s and a handful of sticks. "h.e.l.lo, Mr. Cates. Officer Cates said I should help you today."
"Boyd." He"d given Boyd a part-time job over the summer. The kid reminded him of himself at that age. "What"d you do this time?"
The teen kicked at a tuft of gra.s.s in front of him. "Spray painted graffiti."
"You"ve got to think these things through, Boyd." Tynan didn"t put up with his excuses. "We talked about this last time, remember?"
"I know. It"s just-" He stopped when he realized who he was talking to. "Yes. I remember."
He knew what this kid was going through. h.e.l.l, twelve years ago he was this kid. A bundle of an excess of pent-up energy. Full of p.i.s.s and vinegar and the focus and discipline of a gnat.
"Okay, well, how about you start by jogging them around the field once?"
"Sure, Coach." Boyd dropped the equipment in the gra.s.s and jogged off as directed.
Someone pulled on his pants leg. He looked down at Henry Lee. "Hey, HL, how"s things?"
The kid shrugged. "Where"s Coach Quinn?"
"He had to stay at work late." Hawk was a cop, so Henry Lee was probably used to it. "Guess you know about that, huh?"
"Yeah, but I wanted to ask Coach Quinn a favor." Henry Lee kicked his lacrosse stick with his cleat-shod foot, then released a big shoulder-slumping sigh.
"Can"t you go by the station after school tomorrow and ask him?" Quinn was the kid"s G.o.dfather. Tynan was pretty sure he was going to say yes to the kid no matter what it was.
"I guess." The kid swooshed his stick at the gra.s.s, then looked up, his face sober. "Can I ask you instead?"
"Sure, I guess." How bad could it be? The kid was six years old. Dammit, Quinn was better at this stuff. "Although you probably should talk this over with your daddy. I know my dad always has the best advice."
Henry Lee"s face fell like he"d lost his puppy. Oh, h.e.l.l. He hoped he didn"t cry. He wasn"t very good with crying kids. Tynan had one just-rub-dirt-on-it speech in his repertoire that he"d used in the Army. It might not work with a six-year-old.
"Could you find my daddy a girlfriend?"
Tynan choked and coughed. "You want me to do what?"
"I been looking for a mommy for us for a while now. But every time I find one there"s always something wrong with her."
He really wanted to know what was wrong with these didn"t-make-the-cut women but knew that would only encourage Henry Lee. Tynan let himself imagine the fun he and Quinn could have with this, setting Hawk up with women, then filed it away with things mature men didn"t do to their friends.
He got down on one knee so he could talk to Henry Lee on the same level, resting a hand on his shoulder pads. "HL, you really need to talk to your daddy about this."
"I did."
"And what did he say?" It was hard to see the kid"s whole body sag, but life deals everyone a c.r.a.ppy hand at some point. Those c.r.a.ppy deals and how they dealt with them were what shaped a person and made them what they were. And sometimes you got those c.r.a.ppy deals at six.
"He said he can"t marry a lady just because she"s a good mommy."
Looking into Henry Lee"s sad eyes, Tynan felt stark sympathy for him. h.e.l.l, he felt worse for poor Hawk. Guilt must stab him daily looking into that face. He tried to channel a six-year-old"s logic. "What"s your most favorite toy in the world?"
HL scrunched his face up in concentration. "My Super Ninja Squirrel."
"Why? What"s makes it special?"
"It has a cape and mask, and it fights bad guys, and it has a turbo-action tail that spins around and knocks out his enemies like this"-Henry Lee dropped the lacrosse stick and spun around in quick, ninjalike moves, as if fighting an imaginary bad guy-"and it can karate chop a T. rex or a shark."
"HL, dude, your Super Ninja Squirrel sounds awesome." Tynan raised his hand and they gave each other a high five. "So, what if I said I was replacing it with a toy I picked out, say a Tickle Me Elmo doll or one of those new Transformers action figures?"
Henry Lee frowned up at Tynan. "I wouldn"t like it."
"Why not?"
" "Cause it"s not the same. My Ninja Squirrel is special."
"Right. Just any old toy isn"t the same." Tynan stood up and placed his hand on HL"s shoulder. "It"s the same for your daddy and finding a girlfriend. You can"t just pick any woman for him. He has to think she"s special, and he has to pick her out himself."
Tilting his head, Henry Lee squinted an eye up at him.
"Does that make sense, HL?" Tynan gave himself a mental pat on the back for having successfully navigated this conversation. "Are you good?"
"Uh-huh." Henry Lee swung his stick and hit himself on the head. Good thing he was wearing his helmet. "Ouch. Can you help me find a girlfriend my daddy will think is special enough to pick?"
Well, h.e.l.l.
Chapter Eight.
The next day Tynan sat on a stack of sheetrock in the center of the library"s lobby. It had been another long day, but he looked around satisfied with the rate of progress. Miraculously, the pixie wasn"t slowing them down.
He snorted because he knew that was only because every man on his crew wanted to keep her, so even though they were flirting and joking with her, they were working d.a.m.n hard to stay on schedule. Surprisingly, Lu had made it through the first week with absolutely no prior construction experience. That much was obvious. But d.a.m.n, she was a fast learner. She picked up most tasks darn quick. And she could mult.i.task because she"d talk his head off while she worked. Yep, she was a regular worker bee-with anything below six feet.
Tynan a.s.signed her jobs and Lu did the ones that fit within her parameters of a "low-construction specialist." Which meant Tynan was climbing the ladder more than usual. Sure he thought about cutting her loose on each of his trips up the ladder, but then his brain talked him out of it. Whatever reason pushed a woman to take up construction out of the blue, it probably wasn"t good. Whatever it was, he figured paying her for two weeks wasn"t going to break him.
No, it was going without a full night"s sleep again that was going to break him. Reaching down for the bottle of water at his feet, he crooked his head left and then right, trying to work the kinks from his neck. d.a.m.n, he was tired. It felt a lot like when he"d first gotten home.
When Tynan had returned from his last deployment in Afghanistan, he had needed time to reorient himself. Time to decompress. Time to pack away some of the mental and emotional baggage he"d brought home with him. He knew his family had worried about him back in those early days. Days when he"d hole up in his house or disappear off into the woods for days on end. h.e.l.l, he even looked for answers in the bottom of a liquor bottle for about a month, but mostly he"d just check out mentally while surrounded by the people he loved and trusted the most. Even though he could see the worry in his family"s faces, he couldn"t pull it together those first few months.
He was never alone during that time because all the guys he"d lost showed up in his dreams every night. He had to fight to work through the pain and guilt. Because over there, in the middle of a war, there wasn"t time to mourn. He"d had to pack up all the emotion in order to stay focused on the next mission.
So his first few months back were a hard slog, but not as bad as other vets he knew. He didn"t suffer from PTSD. Nope. No flinching at loud noises. Which was helped by the slight hearing loss; hanging around artillery and loud plane engines will do that to you. Sure he might still check his six and tense up a bit when he saw something on the roadside or just before turning a corner on the sidewalk, but h.e.l.l, in today"s world, didn"t everybody?
He came back in one piece when not everyone in his squad did. Torrez lost an arm from small-arms fire. And O"Reilly got sent home with a head injury and burns after the rocket-propelled grenade hit his Humvee. And then there were the four they lost. Those haunted his dreams until he"d come up with a solution.
One night, after months of being unable to sleep because his men kept showing up every night in his dreams, he sat them down at a poker table and started to play. And slowly, as the nights piled up, he sat around the table with Murph, Shughart-daddy, and Alphabet. They bluffed over c.r.a.p poker hands, laughed, talked s.h.i.t, and, some nights, talked about life. In a sick, twisted way it helped him deal with the loss. It kept his band of brothers with him and helped him find his footing again. That was a comfort.
Except Joey. He couldn"t coax Joey to the table and into the game. Joey always sat slumped in the shadowy corner, staring at him like he was waiting for something. Like there was some unfinished business. Some unfinished conversation or deed Joey was expecting from him. h.e.l.l if he knew what it was.
After weeks of drinking at home by himself, too many sleepless nights, and his parents and brothers constantly checking on him, one day his brother Kaz finally stepped in.
Kaz was wicked smart and just about the calmest, most laid-back guy he knew. It took a lot to p.i.s.s Kaz off. Which was why Tynan was a little surprised when, of all his brothers, it was Kaz who showed up at his house one day demanding he get his s.h.i.t together. Tynan had been holed up in his house for four days and still crawling out of a two-day hangover, so not in the mood to listen to Kaz"s decrees.