Cry Me A Sad River

14

There are some things between human beings that separate them from each other, these things can draw a deep crevice between one another, after the rain, it becomes a river and can never be crossed again.

If the surface of the river becomes enshrouded in heavy fog……

Just like the first time Qi Ming’s wet dream stained his underwear when he was fourteen, he had shoved his pants beneath his pillow after getting up that morning before leaving for school. When he reached home in the evening, he took the pants from that morning to the toilet. Encountering his mother, his face had flushed slightly.

His mother looked at him holding his pants and reached for it out of habit. Surprisingly, Qi Ming refused.

“Why are you washing pants, don’t I always wash it for you, are you possessed today, dumb boy,” His mother reached for it again, “Give it to me and you can go and read your books.”

Qi Ming turned, his face feeling as if it was burning, “No, I’ll wash it myself.” He moved his way around his mother and went into the toilet before locking the door.

His mother stood outside the door, listening to the spluttering of the tap before smiling knowingly.

Qi Ming walked out from the toilet, shaking off the water on his hand, just as he was wiping his hands on a towel, his mother stood in the hallway looking at him with a smile on her face, “Dumb boy, of course mother knows.”

A sudden uncomfortable feeling seeped into his heart from his blood vessels, like drinking overly sweet sugared water, so sweet that it hurts the throat. Like having a mosquito bite in the throat.

“No, I’ll be reading my books.” Qi Ming touched his face- it was uncomfortably warm.

“Oh yo, why are you being shy with your mother. Next time I’ll still wash it. Be good. You’re becoming a young man, haha.”

Qi Ming closed the door to his room and fell onto his bed before tugging the blanket over his head.

His mother’s voice on the phone outside the door is high-pitched and clear.

“Hey, Qi Fangcheng, your baby boy is becoming an adult, haha, let me tell you……”

Qi Ming laid on his bed, with the covers over his head, he reached out to the light switch on his wall, he turned it on and off, on and off. The light couldn’t pa.s.s through the blanket; only a faint glow flickered over his eyelids.

As if his head was covered with a layer of grey membrane, one that resembled the colour of dusk in the longtang, coupled with the heaty smell of cooking, it stifled his heart.

A few days later, one morning when he was heading out for school, his mother was chatting with a few other middle-aged women outside their door. Qi Ming tugged on his backpack and squeezed past them and told his mother that he was heading to school in a low voice.

Two steps later and Qi Ming could hear the conversation from behind him unfurling in his ears.

“Heard that your son, oh~ heh heh.” Disturbing laughter.

“Oh yo, Li Xiulan you have such a big mouth, how can you tell that to everyone.” His mother’s feigned anger. Her voice was pretentious and annoying, and the smile could be heard.

“Aiya, this is a good thing, isn’t it good to be able to hold your grandson. Ahahahah.” Dislikable laughter.

“The kids nowadays, really, so much nutrition, thinking back to the one in our house, sixteen!” An older woman.

Qi Ming drags out his bicycle form the shed harshly, too much force, the line of bicycles parked at the mouth of the longtang all came crashing down.

“Oh yo, he’s shy! Your Qi Ming is really innocent.”

“What innocent, what are you even saying, why are you so crude.” His mother laughed along with them.

Qi Ming wished he could throw a grenade at the longtang and return peace to the world.

Just as he turned out from the mouth of the longtang and was about to get onto his bicycle, he saw Yi Yao ahead of him.

“Your glorious deeds,” Yi Yao turned and waited for Qi Ming to catch up to him, “Even I heard of it.”

Qi Ming drew in a cold breath as he almost collided with an auntie who just came back from shopping, a series of “Oh yo, do you want to die, be more careful okay?!” ensued.

Yi Yao attempted to stifle her laughter and failed, “I can only say that your mother is really something, being able to talk about things like this, then again, old women are all like that.”

“Your mom doesn’t talk about it.” Qi Ming huffed. He puffed out his cheeks.

“Lin Huafeng?” Yi Yao rolled her eyes at him, “We can forget about her.”

“At least she didn’t say anything. Your first time……that happened.” Although he was only fourteen, but teachers all talked about it in health cla.s.s.

“My first time happened on the way back from school, I suddenly thought that ‘I’m done for’ and paddled home furiously, I felt like a thief and that the whole world was staring at me, that they all knew that the little girl who’s riding on that bike has her good friend coming. In the end, when I got home, I changed my pants and told my mom, she said nothing and rolled her eyes at me, pulled opened a drawer and threw a packet of pads at me. The only sentence she said was, ‘be careful, don’t dirty the sheets, and change your pants and wash it quickly, it’s disgustingly smelly’”, Yi Yao skidded to a stop at the red light and turned towards him, “At least your mother still washes your pants for you, be content, little young master.”

Yi Yao didn’t notice that the boy beside her was blushing furiously. He only asked her casually and didn’t think she’d tell him everything like pouring beans out from a pot. Since they are in a curious age and time where even if a boy touched a girl’s hand in cla.s.s, there’d be chaos.

“Why did you tell these to me……” Qi Ming’s faced resembled the red light.

“Are you dumb, didn’t you ask yourself?” Yi Yao frowned, “And then you become unhappy when I tell you, what a b.i.t.c.h.”

“You!” the boy’s face pales in anger, “Hmph! Sooner or later you’d turn into your mother! A mean forty-year-old woman!”