Chapter 3: That Crafty man (The Tutor"s POV]
RAW:
Author: (Moon Echo)
T/N: This is partially edited. Appreciate if anyone willing to point out any mistake. So here goes…. This mini ma.s.s release is to celebrate the one year anniversary of Incarose Jealousy MTL….. #12
I think that they were a strange sibling.
They were like the spinning yarns that regards one another with the sense of distance only understood by themselves [T/N: I guess like this?]. It might have been inevitable that they ended up tangling with each other.
However, now that I thought about it carefully, I should have shown them a different road.
It was because I was their teacher. As a leader and a guidance, I wonder if there was something that I could do to show them the way…. Even though it was already meaningless, I could not help but felt a little bit of regret because of it.
I, who had been known as a prodigy and a wonder child from young age had been chosen as the tutor for the young Rachel-sama despite being one who was still quite young.
Later, when I asked about it, it seemed that it was agreeable for the teacher to be someone closer in age. Even though I was born in a lower-rank family as compared to the Ducal and Viscount"s house, I was admitted as a teacher due to fact that I was a possible future candidate as Rachel-sama’s. This matter had not been conveyed towards Rachel-sama herself, however, this fact is already well known among the Kruger"s house.
Rather than a fiancée, I was only a husband candidate. Therefore, for the sake of Rachel"s and my happiness, I had thought that this was a good insurance.
For a person to give and received love, they surely need to show themselves up frequently, and I guess this setting was actually convenient for me.
That"s why I did not mind it a bit. If Rachel-sama were to fall in love with me who had always revolved around her, then I will be able to succeed the Ducal family, and if it was not meant to be, with the backing from the Ducal’s house, I will be able to become the officer in the Royal palace. No matter how talented I am, without a strong backing, it was meaningless. Therefore, whichever outcomes in the end, I will not lose a thing.
For me, to be able to achieve those thing in the end, wasn"t it good that I just need to dedicate a few years of my life to them?
It was that kind of deal.
"Clovis~ sensei! Good afternoon."
"Rachel-sama, it should be [Gokigen-yoh], right?"
"A~ I have made a mistake."
I did not feel any kind of love towards this girl who was still young. Though, I do think that this person was cute, but it was nothing more than that. However, as time goes by, it was true that I had been thinking how this girl had transformed from a small kid to a girl and from a girl to an adorable young lady.
However, it was also the truth that there was a gap of ten years between that girl and me which somehow become a deep ravine on how we regarded about each other. Rather than the feeling between a man and a woman, it felt more like the relation between a brother and a sister, despite not being blood related, though. This had also made the relationship seems so vague.
Well, after teaching Rachel-sama for a couple of years, with the strong demand from Seira-sama, it seemed that I was also going to guide her study. Although outwardly I was granted with the permission to teach her, it seemed that, that girl had purposely designated me as her teacher with the intentions of preparing some kind of a scheme.
—I wonder if she tried to deprive me from my position as the future candidate of her older sister"s partner.
At that time, I already knew the inner circ.u.mstances of the Ducal’s house and I had been viewing Seira-sama with some kind of a prejudice.
Compared to her older sister, that girl had always been tossed around by others as something that they want to get rid off. And I guess, that is the reason why, she wanted to take something that belonged to her older sister as hers; and since I was the closest to her, it was actually convenient for her to choose me instead; what"s more, even though I was from a lower rank aristocrat family, with my excellent grasp of the surrounding and good appearance, that could be considered as a bonus to her.
However, when I reflected on it later on, I guess that I had been too self-conscious and it seemed that her intention was actually different from my earlier speculation.
"Sensei, have you ever seen the sea before?"
That was the first sentence that she had uttered to me that seemed to be out of the studying context. It was the first time that her eyes focused on me.
I felt like I saw an illusion that there was an invisible flash of blue from the inside of her eyes.
"I have. My distant maternal aunt was married off to a country near the sea. I have talked with her on multiple times in regard to this topic when I was small."
"…..I see."
"Is Seira-sama interested in sea?"
"Well… I"m not sure about that."
You could never imagined seeing a girl at the age of 10 to be able to laugh so profoundly.
She started to look over the window as if seeing something so dazzling in the far off distance that the words died in my mouth.
"…I just wanted to see it."
"…That might be difficult?"
"Why?"
"The sea only existed in the other country. Therefore, it will be difficult for a n.o.ble lady to actually leave this country and go far away to another country."
"Hahaha… Oh well, after all, I am still the young lady of a ducal house, right?"
—I wonder how many people thought of her so… I somehow had a false impression that those words were said while being laced with a sarcasm.
I thought that this girl was clinging on her position as the daughter of the Ducal’s house, however, her expression itself, seemed to contradict her words, as if she was denying her life by her own hand.
There was also a reason that make me believed that she had been lying about her outward appearances. It appeared in such straightforward manner to me and not to mention that she was also a good student. Whatever problem that I put out for her to solve, she able to absorb all of it like a fish who had finally met the water. She also did not miss with the preparation for the study as well as reviewing all of the material and in fact her learning speed had long surpa.s.sed her older sister.
It might only be me and her attendant who knew about this fact. She was after all, living with the contempt from the people in this house. No one had ever taken notice of her natural disposition. No one even cares about this shadow in the presence of the sun.
Even though I knew about this fact, I had never changed myself. In order to protect my own position, I decided to avert my eyes from the darkness that lurking within the ducal house…. I have never considered myself doing something wrong. However, as a person who had been chosen to guide them, it cannot be said that my judgement was correct.
Shortly after Rachel-sama completed her study, Seira-sama had also decided to quit and when I asked her the reason for it, she told me that it was because she no longer have a need for that anymore.
She told me just that. What was left to study was no longer necessary for the common people.
As a result, that girl instead asked me to tell her [the information on the other countries as well as the story of the sea]. Apart from that, she did not even viewed me as the possible candidates for her older sister"s partner.
The atmosphere that had surrounded this pair of sisters were totally different.
Rachel was like the incarnation of the sun, which was full of virtue, innocence and also charming. All the servants yearned for her. Once she appeared at the evening party, she lightens up that place and stole the gaze of the surrounding people. Everyone was fascinated by her and everyone also accepted her favourably.
–Seira-sama in other hand, was always persisted with her peaceful persona; her tranquility aura was no longer considered as being gloomy. She was like the moonlight that did not possess any kind of temperature. The air that surrounded her seemed to feel so sharp, that it capable of cutting someone, thus no one was trying to get near to it.
There was no one who likes the shadow. And the shadow-like Seira-sama was also unwilling to be near others. Despite that, others seemed incapable of averting their eyes from her, as if, there some kind of mysterious magnetism around her that pulling themselves in.
I thought about the light and the darkness, and due to these opposite charms, that these two were sisters. There seemed to be a thread that connects these sisters who did not resemble each other which made them stood back to back, inseparable.
Each of us had our own role to play with, and for this Ducal’s house, it was by sacrificing Seira-sama.
It was difficult to break what was already distorted and perfected once. However, this problem might be able to be solved gradually.
I was their teacher, and I was also the man who had treated both of them equally. In the presence of knowledge, equality was my creed. If I had decided to become the bridge, Seira-sama will never be banished from this country. And I wonder if that will be a form of liberation for me. However, it was a terribly foolish thing to consider now.
Everything was already too late. Just about everything was already overdue.
It was already too late, and there was no one here.
I seemed have been praising myself as the rare and outstanding talent in the world, but it appeared that the crow who have been flying in the sky, had been laughing at me over the degree of pride that I had over my own existence.
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