*You piece of-"
*Stop it!" Khaden yelled, stepping between his father and brother. *I started this, not Taj."
Mike grabbed Khaden by his favourite Ramones T-shirt and shoved him aside. The shirt tore. Khaden slammed into the table.
Rage filled every cell of his body and pushed against his skin. He"d had enough of the lies, the tension and the fights. His mind a black, swirling mess, Khaden gritted his teeth and clenched his fist. With a grunt, he punched Mike as hard as he could.
Mike staggered and slumped to the floor, his eyelids fluttering.
Khaden"s mind cleared. He shrunk back. What had he done? He was no better than Mike.
*Khade?" Taj tugged on his shoulder.
*I hate him, I hate her and I hate you!" screamed Khaden. He sprinted from the kitchen and out of the house into the dark night.
Sas Khaden came around last night. He looked even worse than he did last time, not b.l.o.o.d.y, but sweaty and shaky, and sure he"d killed Mike. After Mum calmed him down, she went around to their place to check on Mike. Got to give her that, she"s tough! I can"t believe I always thought she was a flake.
While Mum was gone, Khaden and I talked and talked and decided on a few things.
We have to tell Ruby about us. Soon.
We have to be more honest with each other (which means I"m going to tell him about Dad, Lee and everything, but just not tonight, I"m too tired.) We both have to be more patient with Ruby.
(Okay, so I have to be more patient with Ruby, Khade is patient with everyone.) The dares and stuff have to stop.
We"re going to ask Ruby to come to the Angst Ridden concert at The Bas.e.m.e.nt. (Taj is mixing, so he"s getting us in.) aKhadena and I were good.
When Mum came back home at about two o"clock, she told us she"d taken Taj home after finding him walking the streets looking for Khaden. When Mum and Taj arrived at Khade"s place, Mike was sitting on the front door step, bleeding from a gash above his ear. Khaden hadn"t caused that-Taj had.
Mum took Mike to the hospital, where he had four st.i.tches, and then took him home. She said they talked, but wouldn"t tell me what about, just that Khade would be staying with us for a couple of days.
Now Mum and Khaden are in the lounge room talking, and I"m in bed, listening to their voices float under the door between the two rooms. I can"t hear their words, just the rise and fall of their voices.
I can"t work out what has made Mum so-I don"t know-not motherly, because she is still a complete ditz about cooking and other domestic stuff, but so caring and wise. Just not flaky anymore.
Now I just have to sort out Ruby and me. Fingers crossed she"ll come tomorrow night, even though it"s not her sort of music. It"ll be fun to be the three of us again. Khaden, Ruby and Sas.
And if I can just work out the stuff between Dad and me, my life will be perfect. I miss him.
Ruby I was alone, watching TV. Harrison was staying at his friend Jed"s place and Mum and Dad had just left to go to Archie"s end-of-year concert, which I"d weaselled out of by faking sick. Technically not a lie, as the thought of spending three hours on hard seats watching little kids in Christmas costumes prance about a makeshift stage did make me feel ill.
I lay on the sofa flicking from station to station. Every couple of flicks I"d check my mobile. I hadn"t heard from Sas or Khaden-no texts or messages on Facebook, Mys.p.a.ce or MSN-since the train thing. At one point, my paranoia was so strong, I checked to see if they"d dumped me as a computer friend too, but they hadn"t. That didn"t make me feel any better.
Nothing felt the same, not the sunshine, the water in the shower or even my mattress. My body felt heavier, harder to move, and food tasted like dead gra.s.s, or at least how I figured dead gra.s.s would taste. Dad avoided me. Mum watched me as though I was a bomb about to explode at any second. She kept asking if I was okay, which only made me feel worse. When Mum wasn"t asking me if I was okay, or if I needed to talk, she encouraged me to *phone a friend", as if my life was some demented TV game show.
Maybe she had a point. Maybe I should make the first move, but if Sas or Khaden contacted me first, it would mean more.
After flicking through the channels for the fourth time, I settled on an ancient movie, Ghost, more for the hilarious fashions than the story. That was when my phone vibrated on the coffee table. I stared at the message symbol with *Sas" beneath it.
I took a deep breath and reached for the phone.
*Hey. What"s goin on? S xo"
My thumb twitched against the side of my phone before I replied.
*Watching Ghost. Check out the overalls!" I waited before pressing send.
Sas"s reply was fast.
*Can u come over?"
*Sure. What"s up?"
*Nothing, just hanging. Stay over."
Sas wanted to hang out with me again. *Catch you in 15."
In the kitchen, I s.n.a.t.c.hed up the home phone and dialled Dad"s mobile.
*Ruby, what"s wrong?" he whispered. I could hear movement and knew he was leaving the hall. In the background I could hear that terrible Rusty Holden Ute Christmas song. Why did teachers think that was cute? I shuddered.
*Ruby?"
*I"m going to Sas"s place, Stuart."
The Rusty Holden Ute had faded to a buzz. Dad cleared his throat. *I thought you were ill."
*I am, but it"s not catching. Anyway, I don"t feel like being alone."
I could almost hear Dad"s brain grinding as he thought. *Ruby, if you"re up to anything, I swear..."
*Well it"s not like you can do anything about it, is there, Stuart, unless you"ve-"
*Don"t you dare call me Stuart," he hissed. *I am your father."
I scoffed. *Yeah."
*Ruby-"
*So, I"ll be back tomorrow."
*Your mother..."
*Mum has been nagging me to call my friends all week. She"ll be happy.
*Do I have a say?"
*Nope. Just telling you." I hung up and sprinted upstairs to pack.
Lou opened the door when I knocked. *h.e.l.lo, Ruby! Haven"t seen you for a while."
I shifted the overnight bag on my shoulder. *Kind of grounded after..."
Lou smiled. *The cling wrap?"
I raised my eyebrows.
*Well, it"s not like you smashed her windows or scratched the duco, is it?"
*Wish my mum and dad saw it that way."
*How is Ginny?" asked Lou, still standing in the doorway. *I haven"t seen her for ages. Or Stuart."
*They"re at Archie"s end-of-year concert."
*What torture," said Lou. *I bribed the girls to miss tonight. Cost me two DVDs, a packet of microwave popcorn and a trip to Luna Park after Christmas. You, Sas and Khaden can take them." She sighed. *Now I just have to find an excuse to miss Madison"s graduation. Sas"s ceremony went on and on." She rolled her eyes. *That"s right, you were there too!" Her laugh reminded me of a bird"s trill. *Honestly, it"s just the end of primary school." She stepped back to let me past. *Sas is in her room with Khaden."
I grinned. We were Khaden, Ruby and Sas again. I pushed my overnight bag ahead of me with my knee, and headed to Sas"s room.
She met me in the doorway. *Hey!" Sas grabbed my bag and tossed it on her bed. I dumped my handbag beside it.
Her room looked fantastic, even better than when I"d last seen it. The curtains, in blocks of lime, purple and fuchsia, billowed with the breeze coming through the windows either side of the mantelpiece. Bright photo frames, the cream lamp, ma.s.sive Buddha, purple alarm clock and iPod speakers, jostled for s.p.a.ce on the mantelpiece. Heavy purple curtains hung over the gla.s.s doors, blocking out the lounge room. In front of them was a blue sofa and in the corner, a desk.
*It looks amazing, Sas."
*Doesn"t it?"
Khaden stepped back from the laptop on Sas"s desk. *How you been, Ruby?"
As he moved, I saw the silver frame edged with flowers. I stood frozen to the spot. For as long as I could remember, there"d been a photo of Sas as a little kid sitting on her dad"s shoulders in that frame. Now it held a photo of Sas and Khaden that I"d taken at the pool. They sat on Sas"s towel, heads together and smiling. Goose b.u.mps popped up along my arms and the back of my neck.
*Like it?" said Sas, brushing past. *My father gave it to me."
It took me a minute to realise she was talking about the laptop.
*Yeah. I guess."
*The hard drive is huge, bigger than Mum"s PC, and it has wireless broadband."
Sas"s voice washed over me as I stared at the photo and tried to make my smile real. I hadn"t been paranoid. Sas and Khaden had been different-they were different. Why hadn"t I realised before now? The signs were there-the looks, the stepping apart when I neared them, the ring-but somehow I had pretended it wasn"t happening.
If Sas and Khaden were more than friends, what did that mean for us-Khaden, Ruby and Sas? And if it didn"t mean anything for us, then why hadn"t they just told me?
My head spun.
*Awesome, isn"t it?" said Sas, wrapping an arm around my shoulder.
*Early Christmas present?"
*Nah, just another bribe to make me talk to him."
Everything-Sas"s voice, Khaden"s stance, even the air-felt different. I wiggled away from her and perched on the edge of the sofa, gripping my knees. *And this?"
She rolled her eyes. *Cast-off from his old place. Now that he"s moved, everything is "uber cool"-black and white, not that I"ve seen it. Eliza told me."
*We ready? asked Khaden.
*Ready for what?" As I spoke, I checked out Khaden. His hair was gelled into a mess, and he wore black bracelets on his arm, a Ramones t-shirts, but not his favourite, black skinny legs and, instead of his holey Volleys, tartan skate shoes. A faded purple bruise still clung to his jaw.
*Angst Ridden at The Bas.e.m.e.nt. Didn"t I put that in my text?" said Sas, applying mascara at the mirror. She wore a silky singlet with shoestring straps and skinny legs.
*Umm..." I looked down at my baby-doll top and thongs.
*You look great." Sas recapped the mascara. *Just change the thongs."
*Do I have time to do my hair and makeup?" I asked.
Sas looked at Khaden. *Sure. Just be quick."
I set to work on my hair and face.
*Sas, is your mum okay about the band and me staying over?"
Sas laughed. *She"s so delirious about missing tonight"s concert, she"d agree to anything. Anyway, we"ll be hanging out with Taj, so she"s cool. We just have to be back before midnight." Sas draped a scarf around her neck. *Set?"
*I guess." I packed away up my makeup and brush and reached for my handbag. *Umm ... is it ... like, is it an underage gig?"
*Are you going chicken out on us, Ruby?" asked Khaden.
*Yeah, thought you were fearless these days," added Sas.
*No, I mean, I am, I"m just checking about ID."
Khaden patted my shoulder. *Taj has taken care of that, and tickets. A peace offering."
I was too wound up to wonder why Taj was making him a peace offering.
Sas clapped. *So, let"s rock." She danced down the hall to the family room, where she said goodbye to her mum.
Lou hugged Khaden and made him promise to look after us. She kissed my cheek.
I did and said all the right things-we"ll be good and home on time-but it was like I wasn"t really there. All I could think about was Sas and Khaden, Khaden and Sas.
Why had they asked me tonight? It wasn"t as if I was into the indie rock, grunge stuff like them. Sas loved to say that I was into *commercial" pop, with a hint of disgust hanging around the edges of the word *commercial".
On the footpath, casting long shadows, we talked as if the train and fight had never happened. We laughed about the bombs at the pool, Lyndal"s expression when The Fink banished her from the gym, and the trolley thing.
I looked down at our shadows, linked together on the footpath, and realised I didn"t care why they"d asked me, I was just relieved they had, because being with them was easy. Comfortable. Right.