My b.u.m had just hit the seat when Dad started. Words smashed into me-disgrace, irresponsible, idiotic, out of control. One word exploded in my brain. Dishonest.
I fought to stop my own words spraying at him like machine gun fire.
*Don"t scowl at me," he bellowed.
Mum uncrossed her legs and pulled her seat closer to the table. *Stuart, yelling isn"t going to achieve anything." Her voice was calm and soothing.
*Well, what will?" Dad asked. He glared at me and sucked in his lips. Something pulsed above his right eye. *That poor little dog." He drew out each word.
A sob lurched into my throat and I hung my head.
*You can tell the boys what happened to Mojo."
I nodded. The tears in my eyes made the world sparkle.
*Oh, and Ruby," he added, his voice even harder. *You"re grounded, absolutely not to leave the house except to go to work, for the rest of the holidays, and-"
*Stuart-"
*Don"t Stuart me, Ginny. I"m over her!" He was yelling. *It"s time she pulled her head in." He leaned forward, leering. *And," he repeated, his eyes narrowing. *I"m confiscating your phone and iPod, plus you"re banned from the computer until school goes back."
*Oh, come on." I leant back in my chair. *That"s not fair."
*Neither is what happened to Mojo."
Two words- tell him-slithered through the black hate clogging my mind.
The phone rang. Mum pushed back from the table.
*Leave it," snapped Dad.
*What if it"s Archie"s school?"
Dad sighed.
As Mum answered the phone, a rushing sound filled my head and my vision cleared. The wrinkles on Dad"s face were sharper, the greys sprinkled through his hair, brighter. *Do you remember my Economics excursion? The one to the law courts?"
Dad frowned. *What the h.e.l.l does that have to do with Mojo?"
*I saw you in a cafe in a lane off Lonsdale Street."
At first, his frown deepened. Then a look I couldn"t describe flashed across his face. Fear? Confusion? Maybe guilt. *I have no idea what you are talking about," he said, staring at his hands.
His face paled and my courage grew. *The bus dropped us in Little Lonsdale Street and we had to walk through this lane to the courts."
*Ruby, you must have been mistaken," he said, smiling as if I was a three-year-old. *There are no cafes around there."
I leant forward. *There"s a car park on one side of the street and a florist, a bakery and all these cafes on the other, and I saw you. You were sitting in the window and you both had coffees in gla.s.ses, lattes. She had a bowl of something, soup or salad and you had a focaccia or maybe a Turkish roll. There was a bunch of red gerberas on the table, wrapped in purple plastic." I leaned back from the table. *Mum loves red gerberas."
A few minutes ago, Dad was snarling and bellowing. Now he slunk in his chair, face white and sweaty.
*So maybe I"m not grounded after all," I said, staring straight at him. *And as for the whole confiscation thing..."
*Who have you told..." His whispered words trailed off as Mum shook off the caller, a telemarketer by the sounds of it.
If I hadn"t been sure before, I was now.
*I have to register our phone number on that Do Not Call website," said Mum, sitting back down. *I"m sick to death of ... Stuart, you look terrible. What"s wrong?" Mum reached to feel Dad"s forehead. He pulled away from her touch.
*Nothing. Indigestion." His chair sc.r.a.ped on the lino as he stood. At the kitchen sink, Dad poured a gla.s.s of water and gulped it down. He placed the empty gla.s.s on the bench and clutched the counter, knuckles white. He took a slow breath. *Ruby, your actions were irresponsible, but I think your mother is right, Mojo"s death is enough to teach you a lesson." The steel and anger had drained from his voice.
Mum"s eyes widened. *What about the grounding, confiscating the phone and things for the rest of the holidays?"
*Not necessary. I"m going to the bathroom."
When he"d gone, Mum stared at me. *What happened?"
I thought about telling her too, but the worry etched across her face stopped me. *Beats me. One minute he"s going off, the next he"s all quiet and weird. Can I go to my room?"
*Hmmm?" asked Mum, staring down the hall after Dad. She shook her head. *Yes, yes of course. I"ll check on Stuart."
Sas Why, when you"ve had a great, no, perfect day, is the next one a shocker? If Khaden hadn"t talked me into asking Ruby to come to the pool with us, Mojo would still be alive, Khaden and I wouldn"t have fought and I wouldn"t feel so awful.
I don"t want to write about what happened to Mojo. It"s bad enough that I keep seeing her running towards us, one minute tongue hanging out, eyes bright and tail wagging, the next, her face twisted in pain and her tail tucked between her legs. The way Mojo tried to keep running to Ruby was just horrible. And all I can smell is blood and that foul vet clinic. If only I could shake those images and wash the stink out of my nostrils.
I didn"t want to see Mojo dead in that room, but Khaden made me go.
Okay, so he didn"t make me, but I could tell by his face that I had to go. That tiny room and Ruby"s sobs. Ugggh.It made me feel sick-not vomiting sick, but awful sick, like something more than Mojo died.
Poor Mojo.
Poor Ruby.
It was the first time in ages I"d seen Ruby"s dad, too. Stuart"s changed-he"s lost weight and is buff for an old guy, but not as buff as Dad. He"s wearing trendier clothes, too, though now that I think about it, his clothes were a bit too young for him. But it wasn"t how he dressed or how fit he looked that stood out the most. The biggest change was the way acted, how he treated Ruby, right there in front of everyone, after Mojo had died and all. It was as though Mojo"s death was a nuisance. I wonder if he"s like that all the time, if Stuart is what"s up with Ruby.
After Ginny dropped Khaden and me home, I figured my day could only get better, but it didn"t. Everything was okay until Khaden and I went out the back and lay side-by-side under the ma.s.sive lemon tree in the back yard, looking through the leaves and lemons to the blue sky. Khaden said he felt sorry for Ruby and insisted that we needed to be nicer to her, especially after Mojo. I knew he was right, that the whole Mojo thing was horrible, but Ruby had been strange before Mojo. When I pointed out how she"d run off, chucked mentals and acted all paranoid, Khaden just shrugged and said he didn"t see that she was any different.
Was he for real? I tried a different approach and pointed out that technically, because Ruby didn"t snib the gate, and because she started the game of chicken, Mojo"s death was her fault.
Khaden went off and said he was sick of me pushing Ruby into doing stuff, sick of Ruby and me competing with each other.
Me compete against Ruby? That made me furious. I told him I was over Ruby and her moods and was just about ready to end the friendship.
Next thing we were both standing and yelling, a bit like Dad and Mum used to before the divorce, only we weren"t pointing and calling each other names.
Then I said it *Your problem is you don"t understand women-it"s not like your mum..." I stopped before I said more, but it was too late. He was gone, thundering down the side path.
Perfect to zero in twenty-four hours flat.
Dad used to tell me, when we were talking, that life was a gift to be treasured. Wrong! Life sucks.
Later...
Okay, so life doesn"t suck as much as I thought. Khaden came back after dinner and is asleep on the sofa again, but not because Mike had hit him. Khaden came back because Mike was away and Taj had gone out. Mum insisted Khade stay over and help us put up the Christmas tree, which cost Mum fifty bucks. For a thing that will die in a few weeks! Anyway, after we"d finished decorating the tree, Khaden and I talked for ages about all sorts of stuff-TV, Christmas gifts, and Ruby.
Khade has a point. I should try harder with Ruby. We"ve decided we"re going to leave her for the weekend, then ask her to meet us at the park so the three of us can hang out again, maybe go to Khaden"s and listen to him play the guitar. It"s ages since I"ve heard him play.
Everything is good again. Our first fight. Is that a milestone?
IM Chat Sas: Hey Ruby, u ok?
Ruby: Archie"s calling me a murderer Sas: That"s not fair Ruby: He has a point Sas: Come on, Ruby. It was an accident Ruby: Meh. Wot"s on for the w"end?
Sas: Babysitting. Mum has open houses, then study on Sunday. U?
Ruby: Work-both days because of Xmas. Grrrr Sas: Good money for Sundays?
Ruby: Yeah-time and a half. What"s Khaden doing?
Sas: Beats me. Guitar? Working? Want to meet up Monday? Park?
Ruby: Cool-10?
Sas: See you then :P Ruby Sas, Khaden and I arrived at the park at the same time, but from different directions. Khaden and Sas strolled across the oval, laughing. When Sas saw me, she sprinted over and gave me a ma.s.sive hug. *You okay? After Mojo and all?"
I squeezed her tight then wiggled out of the hug. *It was awful."
*Yeah," said Khaden, leaning against the monkey bars. *It sucked. Did you ring that guy who drove us to the vet"s?"
*Last night. Mum"s going to take him beer to say thanks." I cleared my throat, trying to dislodge the sorrow lumped there.
*Surprised to see you here, after the way your dad was," said Sas.
*Yeah, I didn"t think we"d see you again until your thirtieth birthday, at least." Khaden shook his head.
I forced a laugh.
*Let"s just say we came to an understanding."
*What do you mean?" asked Sas.
Despite the hug and the show of concern, I couldn"t shake the feeling they weren"t telling me something, and that stopped me from spilling everything. Plus, I wasn"t sure I could talk about Mojo or what I knew about Dad without breaking down. *So what are we doing today?"
Khaden pulled himself onto the bars and hung upside down like we used to at primary school. *Come around to my place and I"ll play you this song I wrote," he said as he flipped to stand again.
*What"s it about?" asked Sas.
Khaden shrugged. *Love song, I guess."
My skin p.r.i.c.kled. I needed to drown the memories of Mojo, Dad, and all that meant for us as a family, to push away the thick sorrow threatening to swallow me. *Nah, let"s do something. Go somewhere." I danced around them. *We could go to the junction-I need a new mascara-or we could go up to the supermarket and do the trolley thing again."
*Easy tiger," said Khaden, frowning.
*Yeah, let"s just hang out at Khade"s," said Sas.
I stopped dancing. *What"s wrong with you two?"
They exchanged a look.
*Ruby, the other day was awful," said Sas. *Why don"t we just take it easy, lay low today, okay?"
*Nope. I need to do something fun."
A hot breeze ruffled the leaves and clouds scudded together. Another loaded look darted between Khaden and Sas.
*We could see a movie at Chadstone," said Khaden.
It was a start. *So, let"s do it!"
When the bus pulled up at Chadstone, Khaden, Sas and I ran down the aisle, ignoring the tutts from the older pa.s.sengers who hadn"t found our stories and laughter as entertaining as we had.
The heat from the cement was intense. I jumped from the bus step to the footpath. *Where to?"
*Follow me," said Sas. The shopping centre was packed. Christmas decorations crammed shop windows and hung from the ceiling, and Christmas carols filled the air.
*Oh, come on," said Khaden, when we walked past the escalators to the cinema. *What about the movie?"
*Mascara first, then movie, I promise," said Sas, leaning her chin on his shoulder. *Any movie you want."
*Any?" asked Khaden, ruffling her hair.
Sas rolled her eyes. *Yes, even that sci fi, end of the world thing. Right, Ruby?"
I screwed up my nose, but Sas frowned. *Sure thing," I said, heading to the discount chain store.
Sas dragged me towards the department store. *No way, Ruby. Quality mascara."
*The security there is pretty major."
*Make-up"s this way." Sas ignored me and charged into the belly of the place. She stopped by the handbags. *So here"s the thing, we each get something, okay? And no buying anything as a decoy."
I shifted under her stare.
*Meet back here in ten minutes."
With the need to bury all that sadness stronger than my fear, I stepped around a blonde woman in jeans and headed to the wall of make-up. For some reason, I decided to go for middle-of-the-range mascara. I untwirled a couple of wands, checked the colours and picked up a mascara with a gold case. Double black. Perfect. I slipped it between my skin and the waistband of my shorts like I had with the lipgloss. Before I headed back to the handbags to meet Sas and Khaden, I tried lipsticks on the back of my hand and smelt perfume testers.
*Where"s Sas?" I asked Khaden, who was slouched by a handbag display, hands in his pockets.