We had faced about and were retracing our steps, past the rows of peculiarly home-like houses that line Milwaukee"s magnificent lake sh.o.r.e. Windows were hung with holiday scarlet and holly, and here and there a face was visible at a window, looking out at the man and woman walking swiftly along the wind-swept heights that rose far above the lake.
A wretched revolt seized me as I gazed at the substantial comfort of those normal, happy homes.
"Why did you tell me! What good can that do? At least we were make-believe friends before. Suppose I were to tell you that I care, then what."
"I do not ask you to tell me," Von Gerhard replied, quietly.
"You need not. You know. You knew long, long ago. You know I love the big quietness of you, and your sureness, and the German way you have of twisting your sentences about, and the steady grip of your great firm hands, and the rareness of your laugh, and the simplicity of you. Why I love the very cleanliness of your ruddy skin, and the way your hair grows away from your forehead, and your walk, and your voice and--Oh, what is the use of it all?"
"Just this, Dawn. The light of day sweetens all things. We have dragged this thing out into the sunlight, where, if it grows, it will grow sanely and healthily. It was but an ugly, distorted, unsightly thing, sending out pale unhealthy shoots in the dark, unwholesome cellars of our inner consciences. Norah"s knowing was the cleanest, sweetest thing about it."
"How wonderfully you understand her, and how right you are! Her knowing seems to make it as it should be, doesn"t it? I am braver already, for the knowledge of it. It shall make no difference between us?"
"There is no difference, Dawn," said he.
"No. It is only in the story-books that they sigh, and groan and utter silly nonsense. We are not like that. Perhaps, after a bit, you will meet some one you care for greatly--not plump, or blond, or German, perhaps, but still--"
"Doch you are flippant?"
"I must say those things to keep the tears back. You would not have me wailing here in the street. Tell me just one thing, and there shall be no more fluttering breaths and languishing looks. Tell me, when did you begin to care?"
We had reached Knapfs" door-step. The short winter day was already drawing to its close. In the half-light Von Gerhard"s eyes glowed luminous.
"Since the day I first met you at Norah"s," he said, simply.
I stared at him, aghast, my ever-present sense of humor struggling to the surface. "Not--not on that day when you came into the room where I sat in the chair by the window, with a flowered quilt humped about my shoulders! And a fever-sore twisting my mouth! And my complexion the color of cheese, and my hair plastered back from my forehead, and my eyes like boiled onions!"
"Thank G.o.d for your gift of laughter," Von Gerhard said, and took my hand in his for one brief moment before he turned and walked away.
Quite prosaically I opened the big front door at Knapfs" to find Herr Knapf standing in the hallway with his:
"Nabben", Frau Orme."
And there was the sane and soothing scent of Wienerschnitzel and spluttering things in the air. And I ran upstairs to my room and turned on all the lights and looked at the starry-eyed creature in the mirror.
Then I took the biggest, newest photograph of Norah from the mantel and looked at her for a long, long minute, while she looked back at me in her brave true way.
"Thank you, dear," I said to her. "Thank you. Would you think me stagey and silly if I were to kiss you, just once, on your beautiful trusting eyes?"
A telephone bell tinkled downstairs and Herr Knapf stationed himself at the foot of the stairs and roared my name.
When I had picked up the receiver: "This is Ernst," said the voice at the other end of the wire. "I have just remembered that I had asked you down-town for supper."
"I would rather thank G.o.d fasting," I replied, very softly, and hung the receiver on its hook.
CHAPTER XII. BENNIE THE CONSOLER
In a corner of Frau Nirlanger"s bedroom, sheltered from draughts and glaring light, is a little wooden bed, painted blue and ornamented with stout red roses that are faded by time and much abuse. Every evening at eight o"clock three anxious-browed women hold low-spoken conclave about the quaint old bed, while its occupant sleeps and smiles as he sleeps, and clasps to his breast a chewed-looking woolly dog. For a new joy has come to the sad little Frau Nirlanger, and I, quite by accident, was the cause of bringing it to her. The queer little blue bed, with its faded roses, was brought down from the attic by Frau Knapf, for she is one of the three foster mothers of the small occupant of the bed. The occupant of the bed is named Bennie, and a corporation formed for the purpose of bringing him up in the way he should go is composed of: Dawn O"Hara Orme, President and Distracted Guardian; Mrs. Konrad Nirlanger, Cuddler-in-chief and Authority on the Subject of Bennie"s Bed-time; Mr.
Blackie Griffith, Good Angel, General Cut-up and Monitor off"n Bennie"s Neckties and Toys; Dr. Ernst von Gerhard, Chief Medical Adviser, and Sweller of the Exchequer, with the Privilege of Selecting All Candies.
Members of the corporation meet with great frequency evenings and Sundays, much to the detriment of a certain Book-in-the-making with which Dawn O"Hara Orme was wont to struggle o" evenings.
Bennie had been one of those little tragedies that find their way into juvenile court. Bennie"s story was common enough, but Bennie himself had been different. Ten minutes after his first appearance in the court room everyone, from the big, bald judge to the newest probation officer, had fallen in love with him. Somehow, you wanted to smooth the hair from his forehead, tip his pale little face upward, and very gently kiss his smooth, white brow. Which alone was enough to distinguish Bennie, for Juvenile court children, as a rule, are distinctly not kissable.
Bennie"s mother was accused of being unfit to care for her boy, and Bennie was temporarily installed in the Detention Home. There the superintendent and his plump and kindly wife had fallen head over heels in love with him, and had dressed him in a smart little Norfolk suit and a frivolous plaid silk tie. There were delays in the case, and postponement after postponement, so that Bennie appeared in the court room every Tuesday for four weeks. The reporters, and the probation officers and policemen became very chummy with Bennie, and showered him with bright new pennies and certain wonderful candies. Superintendent Arnett of the Detention Home was as proud of the boy as though he were his own. And when Bennie would look shyly and questioningly into his face for permission to accept the proffered offerings, the big superintendent would chuckle delightedly. Bennie had a strangely mobile face for such a baby, and the whitest, smoothest brow I have ever seen.
The comedy and tears and misery and laughter of the big, white-walled court room were too much for Bennie. He would gaze about with puzzled blue eyes; then, giving up the situation as something too vast for his comprehension, he would fall to drawing curly-cues on a bit of paper with a great yellow pencil presented him by one of the newspaper men.
Every Tuesday the rows of benches were packed with a motley crowd of Poles, Russians, Slavs, Italians, Greeks, Lithuanians--a crowd made up of fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, neighbors, friends, and enemies of the boys and girls whose fate was in the hands of the big man seated in the revolving chair up in front. But Bennie"s mother was not of this crowd; this pitiful, ludicrous crowd filling the great room with the stifling, rancid odor of the poor. Nor was Bennie.
He sat, clear-eyed and unsmiling, in the depths of a great chair on the court side of the railing and gravely received the attentions of the lawyers, and reporters and court room attaches who had grown fond of the grave little figure.
Then, on the fifth Tuesday, Bennie"s mother appeared. How she had come to be that child"s mother G.o.d only knows--or perhaps He had had nothing to do with it. She was terribly sober and frightened. Her face was swollen and bruised, and beneath one eye there was a puffy green-and-blue swelling. Her sordid story was common enough as the probation officer told it. The woman had been living in one wretched room with the boy. Her husband had deserted her. There was no food, and little furniture. The queer feature of it, said the probation officer, was that the woman managed to keep the boy fairly neat and clean, regardless of her own condition, and he generally had food of some sort, although the mother sometimes went without food for days. Through the squalor and misery and degradation of her own life Bennie had somehow been kept unsullied, a thing apart.
"H"m!" said judge Wheeling, and looked at Bennie. Bennie was standing beside his mother. He was very quiet, and his eyes were smiling up into those of the battered creature who was fighting for him. "I guess we"ll have to take you out of this," the judge decided, abruptly. "That boy is too good to go to waste."
The sodden, dazed woman before him did not immediately get the full meaning of his words. She still stood there, swaying a bit, and staring unintelligently at the judge. Then, quite suddenly, she realized it.
She took a quick step forward. Her hand went up to her breast, to her throat, to her lips, with an odd, stifled gesture.
"You ain"t going to take him away! From me! No, you wouldn"t do that, would you? Not for--not for always! You wouldn"t do that--you wouldn"t--"
Judge Wheeling waved her away. But the woman dropped to her knees.
"Judge, give me a chance! I"ll stop drinking. Only don"t take him away from me! Don"t, judge, don"t! He"s all I"ve got in the world. Give me a chance. Three months! Six months! A year!"
"Get up!" ordered judge Wheeling, gruffly, "and stop that! It won"t do you a bit of good."
And then a wonderful thing happened. The woman rose to her feet. A new and strange dignity had come into her battered face. The lines of suffering and vice were erased as by magic, and she seemed to grow taller, younger, almost beautiful. When she spoke again it was slowly and distinctly, her words quite free from the blur of the barroom and street vernacular.
"I tell you you must give me a chance. You cannot take a child from a mother in this way. I tell you, if you will only help me I can crawl back up the road that I"ve traveled. I was not always like this. There was another life, before--before--Oh, since then there have been years of blackness, and hunger, and cold and--worse! But I never dragged the boy into it. Look at him!"
Our eyes traveled from the woman"s transfigured face to that of the boy.
We could trace a wonderful likeness where before we had seen none. But the woman went on in her steady, even tone.
"I can"t talk as I should, because my brain isn"t clear. It"s the drink.
When you drink, you forget. But you must help me. I can"t do it alone.
I can remember how to live straight, just as I can remember how to talk straight. Let me show you that I"m not all bad. Give me a chance.
Take the boy and then give him back to me when you are satisfied. I"ll try--G.o.d only knows how I"ll try. Only don"t take him away forever, Judge! Don"t do that!"
Judge Wheeling ran an uncomfortable finger around his collar"s edge.
"Any friends living here?"
"No! No!"
"Sure about that?"
"Quite sure."