There are many good patient-hearted girls, whose lips never complain, but hollow eyes, pale faces, and clouded dispositions utter silent complaints and give evidence of buried ambitions.
f.a.n.n.y"s face was always rosy and smiling: her eyes cheerful and fiery, her disposition always gay, frank and contented; her every feature proved that what she did she did from her heart and her heart was well pleased. Her happy ever-gay presence enlightened the while gloomy circle around her, as when some angel walks in the darkness, with a halo of glory around his figure.
From year to year I found matters so at home when I returned for the holidays: and from year to year one definite idea grew and took shape in our minds mutually.
We never spoke of it: but we all knew.
She knew--I knew, her parents knew and so did mine; nor did we think anything else could happen. It was only a question of time. We were so sure about it that we never spoke of it.
After finishing my course of studies, I became a lawyer; and, when I received my first appointment in a treasury office, one day I drew f.a.n.n.y"s hand within mine, and said to her:
"f.a.n.n.y dear, you remember the story of Jacob in the Bible?"
"Yes."
"Do you not think Jacob was an excellent fellow, in that he could serve seven years to win his wife?"
"I cannot deny that he was."
"Then you must acknowledge that I am still more excellent for I have already served eight years--to win you."
f.a.n.n.y looked up at me with those eyes of the summer-morning smile, and with childish happiness replied:
"And to prove your excellence still further, you must wait two years more."
"Why?" I asked, downcast.
"Why?" she said with quiet earnestness. "Do you not know there is a vacant place at our table; and until that is filled, there can be no gladness in this house. Could you be happy, if you had to read every day in your mother"s eyes the query, "where is that other?" All your gladness would wound that suffering heart, and every dumb look she gave would be a reproach for our gladness. Oh, Desi, no marriage is possible here, as long as mourning lasts."
And as she said this to prevent me loving her, she only forced me to love her the more.
"How far above me you are!"
"Why those two short years will fly away, as the rest. Our thoughts for each other do not date from yesterday, and, as we grow old, we shall have time enough to grow happy. I shall wait, and in this waiting I have enough gladness."
Oh how I would have loved to kiss her for those words: but that face was so holy before me, I should have considered it a sacrilege to touch it with my lips.
"We remain then as we were."
"Very well."
"Not a word of it for two years yet, when you are released from your word of honor you gave to Lorand, and may discover his whereabouts. Why this long secrecy? That I cannot understand. I have never had any ambition to dive more deeply into your secret than you yourselves have allowed me to: but if you made a promise, keep it; and if by this promise you have thrown your family, yourself, and me into ten years"
mourning, let us wear it until it falls from us."
I grasped the dear girl"s hand, I acknowledged how terribly right she was; then with her gay, playful humor she hurried back to mother, and no one could have fancied from her face, that she could be serious for a moment.
I risked one more audacious attempt in this matter.
I wrote to Lorand, putting before him that the horizon all round was already so clear, that he might march round the country to the sound of trumpets, announcing that he is so and so, without finding anyone to arrest him, as it was the same whether it was ten years or eight, he might let us off the last two years, and admit us to him.
Lorand wrote back these short lines in answer:
"We do not bargain about that for which we gave our word of honor."
It was a very brief refusal.
I troubled him no more with that request. I waited and endured, while the days pa.s.sed.... Ah, Lorand, for your sake I sacrificed two years of heaven on earth!
CHAPTER XX
THE FATAL DAY!
It had come at last!
We had already begun to count the days that remained.
One week before the final day, I received a letter from Lorand, in which he begged me not to go to meet him at Lankadomb, but rather to give a rendezvous in Szolnok: he did not wish the scene of rapture to be spoiled by the sarcasms of Topandy.
I was just as well pleased.
For days all had been ready for the journey. I hunted up everything in the way of a souvenir which I had still from those days ten years before when I had parted from Lorand, even down to that last sc.r.a.p of paper,[70] which now occupied my every thought.
[Footnote 70: The paper of Madame Balnokhazy"s letter which was used for the fatal lot-drawing.]
It would have been labor lost on my part to tell the ladies how bad the roads in the lowlands are at that time of year, that in any case Lorand would come to them a day later. Nor indeed did I try to dissuade them from making the journey. Which of them would have remained home at such a time? Which of them would have given up a single moment of that day, when she might once more embrace Lorand? They both came to me.
We arrived at Szolnok one day before Lorand: I only begged them to remain in their room until I had spoken with Lorand.
They promised and remained the whole day in one room of the inn, while I strolled the whole day about the courtyard on the watch for every arriving carriage.
An unusual number of guests came on that day to the inn: gay companions of Topandy from the neighborhood, to whom Lorand had given a rendezvous there. Some I knew personally, the others by reputation; the latter"s acquaintance too was soon made.
It struck me as peculiar that Lorand had written to me that he did not wish the elegiac tone of our first gathering to be disturbed by the voice of the stoics of Lankadomb, yet he had invited the whole Epicurean alliance here--a fact which was likely to give a dithyrambic tone to our meeting.
Well, amus.e.m.e.nt there must be. I like fellows who amuse themselves.
It was late evening when a five-horsed coach drove into the courtyard--in the first to get out I recognized Gyali.
What did he want among us?
After him stepped out a brisk old man whose moustache and eyebrows I remembered of old. It was my uncle, Topandy.
Remarkable!