This chapter was translated for only. And only for those people who don’t mind reading unprofessional translation that was being translated FREELY at the translator’s and editor’s own free times. So rude & ent.i.tled people aren’t welcome to read this translation!!! So GO AWAY….
By Qian Lu
Chapter 74
Choice (Part 2)
Murong Shu Qing could see that Jing Shui’s heart that showed conflicting views and was in pain, so she felt sorry for her, but what should she tell her! There were many things that could not be satisfied in people’s hearts, lightly wiping the tears that were in Jing Shui’s face, Murong Shu Qing softly sighed and lowly said: “Jing Shui, there are many times that one can not have both the fish and the bear paws, do not look at the choice as a suffering, at the very least, you have the right to choose.”
In this era, the women’s abilities to choose were way too little, there would be many people, like fathers, husbands, masters, etc, who made the decisions for all of their lives. They did not need to have their own awareness and needs, all of their educations were for them to obey somebody"s orders. However, even though the decision seemed to be painful for her, but she could have a willpower to make it.
Slowly covering her eyes, Jing Shui did not look at Murong Shu Qing anymore, and returned to that quiet but empty appearance like before. For a long time, Jing Shui slowly stooped her body down and lied down to lean on Murong Shu Qing’s embrace. With her choking and sobbing’s voice, she said with difficulty: “But I do not know what to choose, Miss, you teach me, is that ok?”
Murong Shu Qing"s hand that was caressing Jing Shui’s long hair suddenly became rigid, how could she teach her? Just not letting her to pay attention to other people and seek her own beauty, or letting her to carry on with her kindhearted personality and undertake this suffering on her own. She could make the decision for her, but Jing Shui would still have to bear the choice on her own in the end. Since this was like this, how could she teach her after all.
Finally, unable to see Jing Shui’s silent weep like this, Murong Shu Qing’s slow but calm voice lightly echoed by the side of Jing Shui’s ear: “If you cure your face, you will obtain the happiness that you want and harm another person at the same time. You will carry the guilty conscience and suffering, this kind of happiness and suffering, which one was heavier and which one was lighter, in your opinion? Then, that will be your choice!”
If curing her face could bring her blessing and happiness, it would be worth it, but if it would give her many more guilty consciences and uneasiness, then it was not necessary. No matter what choice that Jing Shui made, she would show her tolerance, give her support, and warmth. But she would still not regret that she let her to make the choice on her own, because this was a requirement to grow up, to choose her own life, no matter if it was happiness or suffering, she would have to make her own decision and take responsibility of her own decision.
The night wind was gradually colder, the rustling sound of the tree leaves was echoing, Jing Shui’s thin and with her plain clothing could not withstand this kind of cold wind, and she was just soaking in her own train of thought and did not actually aware of it. But Murong Shu Qing anxiously grasped her cold hand, carefully supported Jing Shui to get up, and Murong Shu Qing put her own brocade coat and draped it on her body, then she pulled her to enter her room.
Jing Shui was only mechanically following Murong Shu Qing to enter the room and go to bed, her eyes were already somewhat swollen and were still looking upfront concentratedly. Murong Shu Qing shook her head, and covered Jing Shui with a blanket, then she appeasingly said: “Sleep first, you can slowly think it again later, do not force yourselves, if you listen clearly the voice from your heart, you will not regret with whatever decision that you will make.”
Jing Shui seemed to listen to what she said, and quietly closed her eyes. Murong Shu Qing knew that even though she closed her eyes, but her eyelashes were continuously trembling to show Jing Shui’s anxious heart. Tonight, no matter whether it was her or Jing Shui, she was afraid that both of them would not be able to sleep.
Since after that night, Jing Shui did not see Qi Rui again, even when he shouted outside the door, Jing Shui did not bother with him, so Qi Rui was restless. When he was almost driven mad, Murong Shu Qing prevented him from rushing to come in.
“I advice you not to go in now.” Murong Shu Qing was standing at the courtyard door to block Qi Rui’s rude and impetuous figure to come into Jing Shui Ya Xu.
“Why?” Last time, after he finished talking with her, she just ran away, and was not willing to see him now, he somewhat regretted it. If he did not listen to Qing-er’s words at that time, did not let Jing Shui know the truth, and only told her that she could cure her face, it would not be like this now.
Murong Shu Qing helplessly shook her head gently, Qi Rui was already out of his wits now, the way he was thinking in his heart could not conceal the expression on his face now. But was it really good to deceive somebody from the truth in the name of love! It would not, at that time, Jing Shui would not be happier than now, she was just being confronted that someone would be hurt because of her, it was an irreversible fact.
In the middle of the cold wind, Murong Shu Qing did not back down at all to face Qi Rui’s hysterical expression, she tranquilly and calmly answered: “She needs to quietly ponder over it now, you can not help her, not one of us can help her, she can only make the decision on her own, the only thing that we can do is to fully support her in whatever decision that she will make. It is better for you to leave first.”
Qi Rui still wanted to say something, but he was not able to bring it up again, and only watching attentively at the trace of that thin figure that was inside the courtyard, she had lost weight. Why were there many tribulations like this between the two of them? Qi Rui was in some pain so he closed his exhausted eyes, and no longer saw her many distressed things!
Qi Rui tightly fisted his hands, relaxed them and tightened them again, he kept repeating these actions, finally, he eventually took a deep breath, and decided to leave.
Murong Shu Qing was standing at the side of the door, slightly looked up to raise her head, the sunshine during winter was not scorching at all, but it was still able to warm the people’s hearts. The chrysanthemums that filled the courtyard, were already withering gradually, but there were still a few stubborn flowers that were still blossoming. Jing Shui who was sitting on the wooden chair in a distant, looked just like a simple and n.o.ble person, Murong Shu Qing believed that her moral conducts were as tough and durable.
The next day, Lu Yi was still seeing Jing Shui who was sitting there from early morning, just like yesterday, she did not seem to be moving at all. She did not eat nor sleep, and it made Lu Yi feel so anxious that she wanted to go and console her, but she did not know what to say either. Anxiously coming to the side of Murong Shu Qing, she hesitatingly said: “Miss, Jing Shui, she ~~!”
Murong Shu Qing gave Lu Yi a peaceful smile, and answered: “It is alright.”
Even though her mouth said it this way, but Murong Shu Qing’s heart was very clear that Jing Shui’s situation was not very good. It was extremely possible that she was not choosing, but she was rather being in her own world and trying to escape everything.
Lu Yi could obviously see that Jing Shui’s situation was very bad. She could see that Jing Shui’s pale complexion, so she murmuringly said: “I do not understand, Young Master is very genuine and sincere towards Jing Shui, he absolutely does not care about her face. If Jing Shui does not cling to this matter like this, they can be an enviable couple by now.” She did not really understand, why would Jing Shui torment herself like this, and also torment the Young Master.
Murong Shu Qing slightly shook her head, her gentle voice appeared to lightly chant: “It is precisely because Jing Shui feels Qi Rui’s sincerity, so she wants to give him her perfect own self. In front of this love, she only feels that her own self has flaws even more. But she has not completely understood yet, that the true meaning of love is not what is shown on the surface.”
She could not let her continue like this, so Murong Shu Qing came to sit down next to Jing Shui, the ice cold stone made Murong Shu Qing feel the chilliness that immersed into her body. But she did not know how long Jing Shui had been sitting here. Gently patting her shoulder, for a long time, Jing Shui slowly raised her head, but she could not focus on Murong Shu Qing’s clear eyes.
Waiting until she gradually recovered her mind, Murong Shu Qing perked up a gentle smile, and gently said: “Jing Shui, accompany me to go out today.”
Not knowing whether she was infected by Murong Shu Qing’s warm smile, or if she wanted to escape the impossible struggle that she had in her brain, Jing Shui refreshingly answered: “Alright!”
Murong Shu Qing took Jing Shui out of the Shuang Tian Bie Yuan, the carriage was slowly traveling along the trail of the shaded forest, both sides of the scenery could not be regarded as beautiful, but it was still quiet and exquisite. Jing Shui, apart when she was out, she seemed to have little interaction with other people, she once again resumed her manner just like when she was at Jing Shui Ya Xu. Watching attentively in front of her, Murong Shu Qing thought for a while, and she made Yan Yu to turn towards the other direction speedily.
The carriage was not traveling slowly anymore, it was rather traveling hurriedly on the mountain path, both sides of the scenery flashed through very quickly, so one could only see that dead leaves when one raised one’s head. The b.u.mpy mountain road made Jing Shui recovered gradually, so she was holding on the window to support her swaying body. Jing Shui was puzzled, and she asked in a whisper: “Miss, we ~~ where are we going up to?”
Murong Shu Qing faintly answered: “Ling Shan mountain.” Three day’s ago, she originally did not want to go to Xi Lie Yue’s invitation, but since she was taking Jing Shui out today, there was no harm to go at the last minute. On one hand, Ling Shan mountain"s scenery was famous far and wide, secondly, letting Jing Shui met with this unusual woman, was also good.
Very soon, the carriage slowly stopped, Murong Shu Qing took the lead and agilely got out of the carriage, and reached out her hand to support Jing Shui to get down. Jing Shui was hesitating for a moment, and slowly got down the carriage. She actually forgot to bring a veil for today’s outing.
The two people were just barely standing inside the pavilion not too far away, a loud and clear mocking voice came through: “You, this arrogance person is too much! The sun will be setting quickly.”
With regards to this insolent and provoking laughter, Murong Shu Qing did not feel strange at all, except for Xi Lie Yue, there would not be any other woman who would be so bold and unrestrained like this. Jing Shui heard the voice, she was automatically stiffen, and immediately hid behind Murong Shu Qing, then lightly covered her face with her left hand. But she was actually curious with the sound of that clear and bright laughter from the Master, so she slightly stretched out her head a little to secretly look at the remarkably beautiful woman who smiled without any restraint, at the pavilion not to far away.
Murong Shu Qing lazily took her, and lead along Jing Shui’s hand to slowly walk and enter the pavilion.
Just barely entering the pavilion, a man’s voice that carried a slight bewilderment and unbelievable feeling, echoed hesitatingly: “This is ~~ Qin Gongzi?”
Murong Shu Qing raised her head, and b.u.mped into a pair of eyes that looked as deep as the ocean.
Sian’s notes:
Another person finds out that Qin Shu Gongzi is actually a Guniang (young lady). Hehehe… Who’s this guy?