THIRTY-NINE.
Jackson "No gun slinging for a few weeks." The doctor secured the bandage on Jackson"s side. "Although by the look of that shoulder, I"d say you don"t listen well." The doctor examined the recently healed wound. Jackson had forgotten about.
"Yeah, I"ve never been much of a listener," Jackson confirmed with a frown.
"Well, surprisingly, it"s healing nicely," the doctor said as he pulled off his gloves and tossed them into the garbage can by the door. "I"ve had the pleasure of meeting that lovely young lady waiting outside your door, and if you have any sense at all, I"d say you"d better start," the doctor said with an amused shake of his head.
"Thanks, Doc," Jackson said.
"Of course." The doctor gave him a nod as he slipped through the door.
"He"s all yours," Jackson heard him announce to Lexie as he walked out into the hall.
Lexie"s beautiful face appeared in the doorway and Jackson felt the smile immediately capture his mouth. Every time he looked at her it was like seeing the rising sun after a long, cold night.
Jackson grabbed his shirt off the examination table.
"I vote for leaving your shirt off," Lexie said playfully as she approached him.
"Come here." Jackson held his hand out for her. She placed hers in his and he pulled her into him, wrapping his arms around her. It always felt so wonderful to hold onto her. Her fingers traced the edge of the bandage as she leaned into him.
"Does it hurt?" she asked, pulling away to look up at him.
"Nah." Jackson brushed the hair from her face and pressed his lips to hers. He felt like he was home. The haunted part of him that couldn"t rest until Stodden was stopped was finally quiet. All the noise in his head was suddenly muted and he was left staring into the most beautiful eyes in world. He was never one to believe in luck, but in this moment it was hard not to. Though, his momentary bliss was short lived when reality started to shake its ugly head. Stodden"s words echoed in the back of his mind, reminding him of his true colors.
"Where is everyone?" Jackson asked.
"Waiting for you in Giles" room."
"Let"s go see the old man," Jackson said, taking Lexie"s hand.
Nate was leaning on his crutches next to Teddy as they looked over papers that were scattered over Giles" feet as he lay in his bed. Stephanie was sitting in the chair tucked in the corner with a cup of coffee in her hand. She looked completely enthralled in the conversation between Teddy and Nate. Dane was standing against the walls with his arms crossed, watching over the entire room.
"There he is," Dane said when he noticed Jackson.
Everyone turned around to see Jackson and Lexie walk into the room.
"So you made it. Teddy and Dane were arguing who should get your job if you didn"t," Giles joked. He was looking much better since the last time he had seen him. Jackson walked up to the side of his bed. "It"s good to see you, Jackson," Giles said.
"You too," Jackson replied.
"Giles is just being nice. What we were actually arguing about was who gets to console Lexie," Teddy teased.
Jackson just shook his head in disbelief. "You are unbelievable." He smiled. "What"s all this?" Jackson pointed toward the files.
"Nate had me look into something for him," Teddy explained.
"My mother was pregnant when she was taken and the autopsy revealed that she had given birth just before her death," Nate said in a rush.
"I"m sorry, man." Jackson placed his hand on Nate"s shoulder.
"I think my brother is still alive, Jackson," Nate confessed.
Jackson looked into Nate"s hopeful expression.
"Brother? What"d you find?" Jackson asked, glancing between Nate and Teddy.
"Six months after Nate"s mother was taken, the Mastens adopted a baby boy," Teddy informed him.
"What makes you think he"s Nate"s brother?" Jackson asked.
Teddy picked up a photograph of Terence Masten and his wife next to their son on his graduation. "This picture is a few years old, but it speaks for itself." He pa.s.sed it to Jackson.
Jackson looked at the young man in the picture. "Holy f.u.c.k." He looked up at Nate. The resemblance was remarkable.
"It"s enough to convince me to look into it," Nate said with a nod of his head.
Jackson grabbed Nate by the back of the neck and pulled him in for a hug. "You let me know if you need my help." Jackson patted him on the back.
"Thanks, man," Nate said.
"I have some more good news," Giles said. "The doctors said I"m free to leave this place, so one of you is taking me home."
"Dane and I will take you. We"re heading back to Westford anyway," Teddy offered.
Jackson wrapped his arm around Lexie"s shoulder. "We"re heading out, ladies," Jackson teased. "We"re going back to the hotel to grab a few hours of sleep and then I need to get this girl home."
"Are you coming, Stephanie?" Lexie asked.
"No, I"m gonna stay with Nate. I already broke the news to my parents, so I might as well wait out their wrath," Stephanie said as she walked around the bed to give Lexie a parting hug.
"Mike"s mom called me. He"s been missing for a few days. Do you think we should be worried?" A line creased Stephanie"s brows.
"He"ll show up eventually. It"s not the first time. Did they check the clubs?" Lexie asked dismissively.
"Yeah, no sign of him. He was so angry. You don"t think he would do anything stupid, do you?" Stephanie asked worriedly.
"It"s Mike we"re talking about."
"Oh s.h.i.t." Stephanie looked wide-eyed at Lexie.
"Listen, Steph. Stay here and help Nate. When I get home I"ll track him down. He"s been known to disappear on occasion."
"Okay, you"re right. I"ll be home soon. We"ll figure it out, and don"t forget we have lots of boring to catch up on." Stephanie smiled.
"Yes we do."
CHAPTER FORTY.
Lexie.
When Lexie opened the door to her mother"s house she was met with Cherry"s beaming face.
"There"s my beauty," Cherry gushed and threw her arms around Lexie before she even made it through the door. It felt so good to be home as she squeezed Cherry back.
"You look well, darling." Cherry stepped back to get a good look at her.
"I am," Lexie said. "How are you?"
"Fantastic, now that you"re back. All this worrying you guys were making me do was threatening to give me wrinkles." Cherry patted the skin beneath her eyes in a dramatic display.
Lexie laughed as she walked into the kitchen. "I missed you, Cherry." She took a deep breath, dropped her purse on the kitchen table, and collapsed into the chair.
"Where"s your hot piece of a.s.s boyfriend?" Cherry asked, setting a wine gla.s.s in front of Lexie.
"He was making a phone call. He"ll be in any minute," Lexie said as she sat her chin in her hands and leaned on the table. "I feel like I could sleep for days."
"I"d join you for a gla.s.s but I have to get this hot b.u.t.t to the diner. They can"t survive without me," Cherry said with a wink. "I really like this small town. Everyone loves my twist on the famous pies and you know my mystery meat really fascinates the locals."
"I bet it does," Lexie said, grabbing Cherry"s hand and giving it a squeeze. "Thanks for holding the fort."
"Any time," Cherry said. "I love that little diner."
"Did you hear from Evan?" Lexie asked hopefully.
"Not since he left, but he said as soon as he was allowed visitors he would demand we all come."
"Good, he better," Lexie replied.
"So glad you"re back." Cherry kissed her on the forehead and grabbed her keys off the table.
"Cherry?" Lexie called after her.
"Yeah, sweetness?"
"I"m so glad you"re here." Lexie smiled. "You know, we might never let you leave."
"I hope not." Cherry blew her a kiss before opening the door and slipping outside.
Lexie took a sip of her wine and noticed the bottle of nail polish in her bag. She picked it up and looked at it with a sad smile.
She pushed herself to her feet and walked into the living room, toward the fireplace. Her mother had a collection of some of her favorite things lined up on the mantle. Lexie looked at her mother"s favorite tea cup, pictures, books, candles, and the quirky little wood carving. All the memories of her mother washed over her with full-bodied emotion as she felt tears run down her cheeks. She missed her mother so much and the pain was still so fresh.
The door opened and Jackson walked in. "Cherry just slapped my a.s.s," Jackson said, shaking his head.
Lexie tried to smile but she couldn"t hide the sadness that was radiating from her. Jackson"s face fell when he noticed. "What"s wrong?"
Jackson looked up at the framed picture of Lexie and her mother and understanding dawned over his face. He wrapped his arm around her and rubbed her shoulder.
"I"m all right. I just miss her. I will always miss her," Lexie admitted. "And just glad to be home."
"I wish I could tell you the pain goes away," Jackson said sadly.
"I know. It helps if I think about the good things. Like you. I"m glad you"re here with me," Lexie confessed, leaning into him.
Jackson dropped his arm from Lexie, she immediately missed his touch. "I have to tell you something." Jackson seemed nervous as he scratched his chin. "It"s about what Stodden said about the fire. He was telling the truth," Jackson admitted.
"I know," Lexie said, meeting his gaze. "I saw the look on your face when he said it."
"I"ve done a lot of bad s.h.i.t in my life, Lexie. A lot of s.h.i.t I can"t undo, and that still haunts me. That night is one of many."
"You can tell me when you"re ready," Lexie suggested, knowing how difficult this conversation was for him.
"No, I need to tell you. You deserve to know what I"ve done." Jackson searched her eyes and Lexie offered him encouragement.
"It was the day before I was arrested for the final time. Giles pulled me off the street the next day, but it wasn"t soon enough. I was still working for Black at the time as his f.u.c.king puppet. He told me what to do and I did it, no questions asked. He sent us to burn down a house. I didn"t think much about it. Black had always used extreme measures to send a message to anyone who didn"t obey him. He told us no one was home." Jackson paused to take a deep, calming breath. "I sat in my car and watched the guys pour gasoline all around the house and douse the front step. I thought I saw movement in the window upstairs. I watched it for a moment but believed it was just my imagination." Lexie could see Jackson"s eyes glisten as he looked at nothing in particular. He was lost in the haunting memory. "I still can still see the match light and then the flames completely engulf the house. I can still feel the heat on my face as I watched it burn." Jackson closed his eyes. "I didn"t know there was a family in there until I read the f.u.c.king paper in the police station a few days later. "It hate myself for it. I hate myself for all the terrible s.h.i.t I"ve done. I should have checked the house." Jackson opened his eyes again and what Lexie saw scared her.
"Jackson, look at me." Lexie grabbed his arm and turned him toward her. "Those deaths are on Black. If you weren"t there that night, he would have sent someone else. It was a horrible thing that happened, but you didn"t know. You didn"t knowingly hurt them."
"I might as well have," Jackson confessed.
"No, you can"t think like that. It will destroy you," Lexie insisted. "We need to learn from our mistakes and make better decisions. You"re not that person anymore."
"When Stodden was still alive it was easy to convince myself to stay, but ever since we walked out of that club, the reasons that I should go are piling up," Jackson admitted. "If I walk away you can have a fresh start without the reminders of the terrible things that have happened. With me you will never truly be safe. My job puts me in danger every day."
"Stop it, Jackson. Don"t you dare say another word," Lexie demanded. "I was stuck in the past before all this happened. I didn"t really have a future because I couldn"t stop looking behind me." Lexie held up the nail polish. "Alex bought this color for me. He painted it on my toes the morning before he was killed." Lexie looked into Jackson"s eyes. He was quiet as he waited for her to continue. "After it happened, I would paint my toes whenever the color would begin to chip away, because in some way that made it seem like he was still with me. I lived in this bubble, surviving one day to the next until the bottle ran out. I was terrified what it meant. I just wanted to stay close to him the only way I knew how. I searched everywhere for that color until I found it that day with you." Lexie paused to take a deep, calming breath. "But I haven"t been able to bring myself to put it on because I know I don"t want to live in the past anymore. I want to remember, but now I want a future. You made me realize there is more for me in the world than what I have already lived. I"m not scared of danger, Jackson. I"m not scared of what you"ve done. The only thing I"m scared of was the girl I was. You are part of my life now whether you agree with it or not. I will not let you walk away from me. I"ll take you however you come because I"m in love with you."
"Remember when you asked me if beautiful things can come from horrible beginnings?" Jackson asked.
"Yeah."
"They can," Jackson said. His smile felt so warm and bright it melted away all the sadness.
Lexie set the nail polish on the mantle and ran her fingers over it. "To remembering those we have loved and lost, and also to remind us that we owe it to them to live."
Jackson reached in his jacket pocket and pulled out the Walkman he still carried with him. He looked at it for a moment thoughtfully before placing it beside the nail polish.
"Your father would be proud of you, Jackson."
"He would"ve loved you," Jackson confessed. She could feel the tension draining from him as he placed his hands on either side of her face and leaned in close. "G.o.d, I know I do," Jackson whispered against her mouth before claiming it.