Don"t Turn from Summer (莫负寒夏) by Ding Mo (丁墨)
Chapter 50
Does someone ever tease his own girlfriend like this? Mu Hanxia: “Mhm, milk is just fine too.” Taking the wine he hands over, she sits down in the couch by the window with his arms around her. The light is serene and the stars spa.r.s.e. The room is warm and cozy with the heater on. Everything is so cozy.
“You didn’t date someone when you were in high school?” He suddenly asks.
Mu Hanxia gives him a surprised glance and answers, “Of course not.” After pausing a little, she continues, “My mom was badly sick at that time, I could barely copy with daily hospital visits those days. Besides, I never thought about dating in high school. Why would I do such a thing that could ruin my own future?”
Mu Hanxia glances up and catches the faint smiles at the corner of his mouth. She is baffled: “What are you laughing at? What’s laughable about this?”
“Nothing.” Naturally Lin Mochen won’t tell her too much about his thoughts at the moment. But the corners of his eyes and tips of eyebrows are tinted with slight delighted smiles. He puts down the wine gla.s.s, pulling her over to his laps, lowers his head and asks, “So...with me, this is your first time?”
Mu Hanxia answers with a “mhm” and says, “What’s wrong with dating for the first time? Am I not doing well? What a nice girlfriend!”
Lin Mochen is amused. Lowering his head, he starts to kiss her.
They kiss for a long time, some emotional turbulence going on quietly―seducing, tempting and coming closer―of which only they themselves know. But they come to a stop with Mu Hanxia successfully defending her last frontier and Lin Mochen wanting even more. Lin Mochen is a n.o.ble man. If he can’t get further with implicit or explicit suggestions, he will only gracefully continue to... seduce, instead of forcing her.
He has long taken off his suit jacket. Wearing just the shirt and the suit pants, his one arm leisurely rests on the armrest, with her lying against his chest. She is also very relaxed. Never before has she ever imagined herself being so relaxed in a man’s arms. She rests her head on his shirt against his chest and plays with his other hand.
“When your cla.s.smate mistakenly took you as a waitress, why didn’t you explain?” He asks.
Mu Hanxia answers, “Didn’t think there’s any need. Those who care about me won’t change their att.i.tude based on whether my circ.u.mstances are good or bad. As to those who don’t care, whether I clarify or not just doesn’t matter. But I just don’t understand one thing―I had little connection with her in high school and never offended her. Why she... doesn’t seem to hope to see me do well?”
Lin Mochen stokes her long hair and replies, “What’s strange about that? You were so outstanding in high school. You were better than her and she naturally would be jealous. Summer, not all bad intentions have rational explanations. Ah, we will see plenty of those mediocre people in our life. They always remain where they are on the road, focusing their eyes on others, and won’t really achieve anything. But we are different. We only need to move forward.”
His words make Mu Hanxia sigh to herself. She reaches out and wraps her arms around his neck: “You said it so well.”
Her hug makes Lin Mochen feel so comfortable that he can’t help lowering his head to kiss her again.
Half of the night, they just idle by, talking, kissing, hugging, and giggling, so close and so tender. The stars outside the window and the clouds in the sky are all reflected in each other’s eyes.
Mu Hanxia also tells him about the unfortunate happenings of her family years ago.
In fact those weren’t very unusual happenings. In this world, poverty and sufferings, difficulties and struggles are happening every day.
But Mu Hanxia and Lin Mochen are born different people. Even though he is from a divorced family, he never had to worry about money and circ.u.mstances. He wouldn’t have a time that he could hardly survive. He couldn’t even imagine a time when there’s no food in the family or when a hundred yuan would be an impossible amount to get.
But Mu Hanxia has been like this. She is like most of us, coming from a very common family which is not rich but enjoys the common happiness. However, an accidental strike of some unforeseen event could drag the family down. For example, her mother’s serious illness.
The family became short of money and turned to chaos. Smiles disappeared from their faces. Her father no longer smiled, neither did her mother, and nor the once lucky and proud Mu Hanxia. Father started to run shipping business just to make a little more money for medical expenses. At the time she was in the final year of high school, and had to visit the hospital every day. But she never told anyone her difficulties.
Then, Father had an accident and died with a huge debt.
Mu Hanxia almost fell apart.
......
“My mind wasn’t steadfast enough at the time.” In his arms, she said gently and slowly, “Clearly as I knew I could only change my fate by getting admitted into a college, I knew only after I got admitted, could I find ways to apply for charitable a.s.sistance. But I could not stop thinking what I could do even if I got admitted. Who would take care of my mother? Hire somebody? How could I trust them? What if no charity or company would want to a.s.sist me even after I got admitted? With only scholarship from the college, it wouldn’t be enough at all. There would be no way out whatsoever. Admitted, not way out. Not admitted, no way out either.”
Holding her hand in his, Lin Mochen’s eyes are like quiet water, flowing silently.
What then?
Then, the day before the College Entrance Exams (CEE), she received the notice of her mother in critical condition one more time. She was sleepless the whole night that night. The second day, when she sat in the exam venue that was filled with nervous atmosphere, she just felt as if the whole world was falling apart. No one could help her. No one understood the heavy burden on the shoulders of this eighteen-year-old girl. In the whole world, it felt like no single other person would face it with you.
Then, it was no surprise that she failed the CEE and couldn’t get into any college. For some time, she was do disappointed and distressed. But she didn’t even have time to complain or to look for other solutions. Instead, she found a job in the supermarket near home, because only this way, could she take care of her mother at home.
Then, three years later, her mother pa.s.sed away, full of apologies and sorrow. But for Mu Hanxia, who had settled her mind during the three years, there was only love to her mother. She didn’t have the least complaint. She said to her mother, “Mom, leave with peace and rest a.s.sured. We both tried our best. If you live in heaven, be happy and be free of illness and suffering. As for me, I will live well. I don’t feel I lost anything. This is just the way of my life. If I lose something, then I’m sure I have gained something as well. I gained the three years we spent together and I have absolutely no regret of that.”
......
“Later I gradually understood,” Mu Hanxia says, “There are many beautiful things in life that can be easily taken away by fate. So I told myself to live the present all the more and always try to enjoy the present.”
She smiles, but with a slightly absently look, and says, “However, if I could choose for a second time, I would calm myself down for the CEE and try to get a good score, instead of being totally beaten by the frustration. It was me myself who didn’t follow the path well.”
Lin Mochen has been listening quietly. But he suddenly grips her hand hard at these words: “What’s so bad about this path? There’s me on this path.”
His voice is low and tender in the deep night. Mu Hanxia is so touched. She looks up at her, murmuring coyly and vaguely, “But my cla.s.smates all follow their paths well. Seeing them still makes me somewhat regret about myself. I have always been trying to catch up. But it’s so hard...”
“You don’t need to catch up with them.” He says, “You will have the best in the future.”
“Mhm.” She will get the best, she decides, through her own hard work.
Kissing her, he is also thinking that he will give her the best.
His Cinderella has descended to the mortal world to experience all those hardships before coming to him.
But he just wants to get the best from the world and put them all at her feet.
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The next day, Lin Mochen instructs Sun Zhi to keep in-depth contract with Cao Dasheng, showing a determination of acquiring the lot by all means.