"But what if they try again? I know them; they won"t just leave me here! Promise me you will not harm them! There is no need, surely!"
I wished I had not spoken. His dark, haughty eyes rested upon me, half mocking and half tender. "I can make no such promise.
If they do nothing foolish, they will be safe, but that seems unlikely. Or if... ah, what will you give me in return for such a promise, Mina?"
I felt myself blushing. "You have had my blood. I have nothing else to offer."
"Not true," he said. "There is still your soul, your love, your loyalty and company in this long twilight of loneliness. You know what I want." A pang went through me.
"Me, to use against your enemies!"
"Ah, far more than that."
"If you kill me," I said, breathless, "and I become like you, Van Helsing and the others will destroy me without hesitation, rather than let me fall to evil. Be a.s.sured that they will find me, and that you will lose me!"
"You are so eager to surrender to G.o.d, to martyrdom. Why not defy Him a little? If He loves sinners, I must be among His favourites." The Count leaned forward and took my hands. His touch was light, yet I recoiled a little. "Always you flinch when I come near you. Is this with fear or pleasure - perhaps fear of pleasure? You have no need to fear me, Mina. I have done my worst."
"Truly, I am sure you have not. I want to go home. Let us go and I will ensure that Van Helsing and the others leave you in peace!"
"But will I leave them in peace?"
"I would have thought you too proud to sink to such vindictiveness. It seems ign.o.ble."
"I have never shown my enemies any mercy, beloved. I have always harried diem to the very end. I am too old to change my habits."
"Surely not."
"Don"t imagine you can change me."
"I don"t care to change you," I retorted. "My concern is to protect those I love. I have no concern for you whatsoever."
"You lie charmingly. Even for the Devil himself, you feel some sorrow, some pity."
"Then I confess. Of us all, I think you are the saddest."
My defiance only made him smile. "And you, Mina, cannot understand why you are so drawn to me. You know me better than you know your husband. He recoils from your pa.s.sion, does he not, and speaks of madness and cure - but I accept all that you are, dark and light."
Everything he said was true. Yes, I fear him, I despise him, but the fear and the despite are almost a habit, that I have to keep stoking up or else I forget to feel them. But this is the lulling influence of evil at work!
As we talked, I became aware of dogs barking and howling under the window. "What"s that?" I said, starting up.
"Nothing," he said with a dismissive gesture. "My helpers inform me of their presence, that is all. They remind us that no one may come in or go out without my authority."
I made no reply, but my spirits dropped even lower. There was no hope of escape or deliverance. Dracula regarded me as if he knew what I was thinking.
"Mina, have you thought upon what I asked you?"
"I have. My answer is no."
He sighed. "As always you follow your morals, not your heart."
"You are mistaken to think that they differ."
"Very well, we will talk of something else." He leaned towards me and spoke softly. "Consider your son. He is a beautiful child, but sickly, is he not? His heart and lungs are weak. He could die at any time. A head cold could take him from you. You do not expect him to reach adulthood, do you? Deny it all you will, in your heart you do not expect him to live. Perhaps at twelve, or ten, or seven . . ."
By now tears were running uncontrollably down my face. His words undid me utterly. I managed to hold myself upright in my chair but I was racked by sobs.
"He need not die, Mina. I can give him immortality.""Make him-"
"Immortal, yes."
"Undead!" I cried in horror.
"Whatever term you care to use, the point is this; what mother would not desire her son to live for ever? Or to outlive her, at the least. Mina, I have not touched a hair on his head; do you not trust me with him? I could almost love him like my own. Three kisses, so gentle he would not even feel them in his sweet sleep. Of themselves they would not kill him; I can be as delicate as I am brutal. But when his time comes - ah, then you need not mourn his death. For you know he will rise again, and come back to you, and be with you for ever. Your angelic, loving son."
My brain is on fire. I cannot rest or sleep for the endless grinding of my thoughts. When Dracula left me, it was without touching me physically; he took no more blood from me, nor did he force me to drink his. But with his words about Quincey, he did something far worse.
I will not sell my soul for my own immortality. But for my son"s -!
Oh dear, dear G.o.d, what have I done to be so tormented, so cursed?
16 November Thank heaven for shorthand - I write at speed, and in inexpressible distress.
After Dracula had gone, and I had finished my diary, I lay down beside Quincey and stroked his golden hair. He stirred in his sleep; I promised him that we will soon go home. He murmured, "But this is home, Mama. Elena says so."
Now I curse the day I ever befriended her!
I fell asleep, and slept very deeply, almost as if I had been drugged - indeed, I am now almost certain that I was.
When I woke, it was well into morning, and Quincey had gone.
I ran down to his room; there was no sign of him or Elena, and the fire was dead in the grate, as if there had been no one there for hours. The door from the keep to the house was locked as always. I was frantic for a few hours, though I endeavoured to be as calm as I possibly could. I knew where the Count must be - unless he also had deserted me.
But at midday- a very foggy, grey day, with leaves dropping like brown rain from the trees - I heard the locks and bolts being drawn back. I ran down the stairs and was met half-way by Dracula. He looked so grim and angry that he quite unnerved me.
I told him I could not find Elena and Quincey. "I heard nothing, my son was gone from my side when I woke!"
"They have left Carfax," he said simply.
"Why?"
He took my wrist and led me back to my room. "Elena has taken Quincey away, against my wishes," he said, low and furious.
"She has defied me."
I could not understand, and said as much. Dracula seemed as outraged as I was distressed. He answered, "Yesterday she begged me to make her Undead. Her impatience angered me, and I refused. She is jealous of you, beloved. This is her revenge against us both."
And it is worse than Dracula himself taking my son - for at least he has some authority, some integrity; he may be a devil, but he is at least a familiar one! Elena - who knows what is going on in her tormented mind? I put my hands upon his chest and implored him to help me find her.
"Of course," he said. He was calm again, and so tender I was comforted. "Mina, whatever else I may be, in this you can trust me.
We will find her together. She went on foot; she cannot have gone far. Make ready to leave."
As he went to the doorway, a thought occurred to me. "But how did she get past the dogs?" The Count did not answer; he began to turn away but I became more insistent. "Surely I would have heard a commotion, at least? They would not have let her pa.s.s in silence."
"But I trained them to treat her as a friend," he replied. "That was my misjudgement."
"What if Van Helsing and the others are watching the abbey? They might have seen her leave. They may see us leave, and follow."
"The worse for them if they do," he said harshly. "But these are my concerns, not yours. Your presence will ensure that your foolish hero-husband and his accomplices keep their distance."
I am still being used as hostage, I know, but my only care is to find Quincey. I can but pray that if Jonathan and the others follow us, they do nothing to endanger Quincey"s life.
"And if Elena has taken a carriage, or a train? How are we to find her?"
Dracula answered, "She cannot escape me, for my blood is in her, and wherever she goes, her brain cannot help but call to mine."
JONATHAN HARKER"S JOURNAL.
16 November, evening I don"t know if we have been heroes or lunatics today.
Seward has had a couple of men watching Carfax Abbey; they tell us there"s been no activity, no coming or going, but whether they have been idle or un.o.bservant, I do not know. Whatever the case, Dracula has outwitted us.
We made a second a.s.sault on Carfax this afternoon, armed with meat, clubs and a rifle against the dogs. As before the dogs attacked us, but this time we were ready; the meat provided only a temporary distraction, and Seward shot two dead before we gained the crypt door.
We knew the sound of gunfire - even m.u.f.fled by the mist and thick stone walls of the abbey - must have been heard inside. Our hope was that, as it was afternoon, Dracula would still be at his rest. Yet as we entered the crypt, the house had an eerily dead feeling - as if nothing were left there to hear us.
The crypt was as dark and odiferous as I recalled, the walls furry with grime. Now we had time to look around, I saw that the earth boxes, which he brought seven years ago from Castle Dracula, were still there, apparently undisturbed since we had last seen them there. I wondered, but did not voice the question (for it seemed sacrilegious), if the effect of the Holy Wafer were permanent, or if it faded as the Wafer dissolved into the soil? Whatever the case, Dracula seemed not to be using them.
The first tomb we opened was the one into which Dracula had forced Mina. It was empty.
We slowly explored the niches, pushing back lids and looking into tombs, finding only ancient skeletons. I remained terrified that we would find Mina in one. Or even Quincey, or Elena. So terrified that I was near to hysteria.
We did not find Mina, but suddenly Van Helsing let out a heart-rending shout. Seward and I rushed to him, and found him staring down at a male corpse, which lay wide-eyed in an open coffin on a dais. It was Kovacs. His skin was ruddy, the lips positively swollen with blood and indented by the tips of two sharp canine teeth. On whom had he fed his unholy appet.i.te?
"Oh, mijn G.o.d, Andre!" Van Helsing cried. He beat his forehead with his fists; he sobbed in such a paroxysm of grief that Seward and I were powerless to help him. When he began to master himself, he said, "It did not sink in until this moment, that this terrible thing has happened to my dear friend! When we spoke to him, it was possible to believe he was still human. But to see him like this - oh, G.o.d Almighty, what justice is it that so good a man should come to this?"
Then the corpse blinked. My heart beat violently, despite all the horrors I have seen - but G.o.d preserve me from ever becoming inured to them! The creature that had been Andre Kovacs turned his head to look at Van Helsing, and red tears ran down his face.
That face was still n.o.ble and handsome, even in this unholy state. He reached out to Van Helsing. His movements were stiff and waxy, as he fought against the deep vampire sleep.
"Abraham," he said, in a voice of rust. "Ah, my friend, you came back to me."
"Yes."
"I have betrayed everyone. Forgive me."
"You are forgiven." Van Helsing spoke firmly, although tears were welling from his eyes, and he was already taking the stake and mallet from his canvas bag. Seward tried gently to remove them from him, for Van Helsing"s hands were shaking; but Van Helsing said, "No. As his dearest friend, it must be me who delivers him."
He put the point to Kovacs"s breastbone. I waited with beating heart for the end; for the fall of the mallet, the bursting of blood like some obscene red flower as the stake sank deep. And then the fiend gasping, arching its back as it writhed and convulsed, a foam of blood flying from its mouth. Then the silence, the look of peace. I was sweating, almost sick with waiting.
Just as Van Helsing lifted the mallet, Kovacs"s hand came up and grabbed the stake. "No!" he hissed in a deathly voice. "Don"t destroy me! The library -"
"Do it," Seward said firmly. "Don"t falter."
Too late. Van Helsing hesitated and lost his resolve. Stake and mallet tumbled from his grip. The corpse sat up in the coffin; I watched in frozen horror as Kovacs put his arms around Van Helsing"s neck. Both were weeping. I felt tears of pity and horror.
Then, from the side, I saw the vampire"s mouth open, heard the hiss of breath as he lunged at Van Helsing"s neck.
"No!" I cried. I brought my cross out of my jacket; in the gloom it shone with uncompromising brilliance. I thrust it at Kovacs"s face and he shrank back, loosing his hold on his friend. Van Helsing staggered back, coughing and robbing at his throat.
Meanwhile Seward grabbed the implements and stood ready to complete the task that Van Helsing had left unfinished.
"I am sorry," the fiend breathed. "I cannot master my nature." Lying down again, he put out his hands to Seward and me, as if we were lights that dazzled and burned him. "But I beg you, do not destroy me yet. Listen to me, I can help you. If you destroy me now you will never find your son and wife!"
"What do you mean?" I cried.
Seward held back. Van Helsing came right to the coffin lip, showing no fear of Kovacs. "If there is anything left in you that recalls and treasures our friendship still, tell us all that you know."
Kovacs"s face was at once unnatural and beautiful, like an effigy, his voice deep as a grave, slow and cold as clay. I was held in a kind of fascinated horror as I listened. "Dracula wanted you to destroy me. He knew you would come back. But you are too late.
They have gone."
"Gone - where?" All of this shocked me so much I felt that the whole world, not just myself, had turned mad. "Dracula will have gone to the Scholomance. It is my fault. There is some great secret of power there that Beherit does not want him to have, but now, because I failed, he will find and claim it. Then no one, not even you, my friend Abraham, will prevail against him. And he had to take the others with him, for he cannot leave them alone to fall into the hands of others. As long as they are with him, he knows you cannot touch him."
"You mean he"s taken Quincey to Transylvania?" I cried. "But it"s almost winter! The cold will kill him!"
"When did they leave?" Van Helsing asked.
"Before midday, I think. Elena came to tell me. To say goodbye. Beloved niece . .."
"Then we have time to catch them before they reach the coast!"
Seward said, "But he"ll use Mrs Harker and Quincey to keep us away."
"But at some time, he must rest on his native earth," Van Helsing said intently. "Then we strike."
"If we can find him!" I said. "He left without detection."
"That"s why you must take me with you," Kovacs said quietly. "I know his destination is the Scholomance. Only I can guide you to it."
"Why would you want to help us?" I asked bitterly. "You are one of Dracula"s kind now. Why should we trust you?"
"Because I must see Beherit again. Even if he destroys me, I can"t die without seeing the library one last time. Ah, the library, Abraham . . ."