"How"s she doing?" Serenity knew that Glory didn"t really like to talk about her mom, but she wanted her best friend to know that she cared.
"Good days and bad days. Today"s a good day. Can"t be too thankful for those."
"And here I am complaining about a boy."
Glory waved her off. "I live vicariously through you, my little bird. So, by all means, complain away and while you"re at it, please be sure to give me any juicy details that you feel should be omitted."
"Exactly, why would I give you details that I feel should be omitted?"
"Because those are always the best ones."
Serenity laughed and knew she had done the right thing by coming to Glory. She wasn"t sure how her friend stayed so positive, but it always seemed to rub off on those around her, and for that she was grateful.
That night would be the second night that Dair would be unable to see Serenity. He had planned on going and seeing her at some point during the day but plans had changed. He and Raphael had gone to check on Emma and, after finding her hiding in the closet of her room, decided that they couldn"t leave her alone, not with Mildred high as a kite and entertaining every sort of miscreant known to man.
"Where on earth does she find these men?" Dair asked Raphael as they sat in the dark room while Emma slept. They had taken up sentry at her door planning to take out any person who headed in her direction. More than likely, none of these individuals would be too sorely missed. The day had seemed to drag as they listened to fights and other sounds that no child should ever have to hear. Raphael had attempted to distract the young girl with magic which wasn"t really magic at all, but simply his divine powers. She had been fascinated at first but slowly she lost interest and began to withdraw within herself.
"They"re drifters mostly. Apparently, Mildred has herself a reputation for entertaining," Raphael explained, the disgust in his tone evident. "I"ll never understand people like her who waste the life the Creator has given them. Don"t they realize they only get one? Haven"t they any desire to do good? Don"t they want to leave the world having enhanced the life of just one other person?"
"You know as well as I do that many only seek selfish gain and temporary pleasure."
"It is such a waste." Raphael walked over to the window and opened the dilapidated blinds. "You have no idea what little Emma"s destiny is?"
Dair wished that he did, but this was one of the times that the Creator wasn"t giving anything away. All he knew was that she and Serenity were tied together. "No, sometimes I get little flashes when I prepare their dreams but with Emma I get nothing."
"She"s tied to Serenity."
Dair nodded confirming what they"d already talk about before.
"I have a feeling that whatever it is they will do, it is very, very important."
Dair agreed because otherwise he would not be involved, though he hadn"t voiced it out loud. Truth be told he not only did he know their fates were entwined but that it wasn"t going to necessarily be a happy outcome. He looked over at the sleeping child when she started to stir. Dair walked over to her and placed his hand on her forehead. "Sleep, little Emma. Have good dreams and worry not for you have your own two guardians watching over you."
Two days pa.s.sed before Dair was able to see Serenity again. He and Raphael had made sure that Emma made it to school safely, and then Dair was called away on a follow-up to another a.s.signment. By the time Tuesday night rolled around, he was aching to see her.
He appeared in her room wrapping the shadows around himself as he watched her sleep. Just as she always did, she took his breath away.
"I didn"t think you were coming back." Her voice broke the silence and stirred something deep inside of him. He hadn"t realized she was awake.
"How did you know I was here?"
"I can feel you."
Her declaration had him reeling. She could feel him? How was that even possible?
"I don"t understand it either," she admitted. "But I just know when you are near. It"s like an electrical buzz in my veins and it hums throughout my body."
Dair walked over to her bed and sat down on the edge of it close to her. She turned so that she was lying on her side looking up at him. Her hair was wild around her, making her look like an alluring siren.
"I wanted to see you; I just had things I had to take care of."
"Another a.s.signment?"
"One of the things was an a.s.signment; the other was just someone in need of help." Serenity must have picked up on the sorrow in his voice because she reached out and placed her hand on his.
"Are you alright?" she asked.
Was he? He didn"t even know. There was just something about the entire situation with Emma and Serenity that had him feeling uneasy. "Honestly, I"m not sure."
"Who is this person that needs help? Is there something I can do?"
Despite his dismal mood, Dair found a smile pulling at his lips. This female who continually thought of others was once again willing to help, even a perfect stranger. "I actually think you will be meeting her regardless of what I want. Her name is Emma." Dair waited for the recognition to dawn on her face.
"Wait, Emma? As in the Emma? The Emma that was in my dream?" She sat up and pulled the covers close as a shiver ran through her. Dair wanted to wrap her in his arms but he was still a little unsure of whether or not she would welcome his touch.
"Yes. But her name is actually Emma Whitmore." He waited for her reaction before continuing. When she just continued to look up at him with worried eyes, he decided to tell her the rest. "Emma has moved to Yellville. Her parents were killed in a shooting and her aunt now has custody of her."
"Oh wow, her aunt lives in Yellville? Who is her aunt?"
"Mildred Jones." Dair immediately saw the recognition of the name in Serenity"s eyes.
"She"s living with that woman?" Her eyes widened and her lips drew into a tight line.
He nodded. "Raphael, one of the angels and my closest friend and I have been looking out for her."
Serenity let out a long breath. Too concerned about the child she ignored the whole angel part. "That is not a safe place for her, Dair. Everyone knows Mildred and knows her reputation. How could anyone give her a child?"
"I won"t let anything happen to her," he promised and meant it with every fiber of his being.
"Neither will I," she gritted out.
Dair reached up and ran a finger across her flushed cheek. "So fierce, my princess of peace," he told her and saw her eyes soften as she looked at him. "You have no idea just how amazing you are."
"I"m nothing special, Dair," she said and tried to look away, but Dair held her chin to keep her head from turning.
He leaned down until his lips were inches from hers. "Never say such a thing again. Even if the Creator hadn"t singled you out for whatever destiny it is He has for you, you are still special. You give of yourself even when others don"t appreciate you. That sort of selflessness is not common." His eyes held her for a few minutes more and then he finally gave into the burning desire. He needed to taste her, yearned to know her lips in an intimate way, and couldn"t hold himself back any longer. He moved slowly to give her time to tell him no, but he could see the surrender in her eyes and the need as she leaned towards him. Dair felt her warm breath on his face and her respirations increased. He wondered if her heart was pounding out a rhythm as hard as his was. He released her chin and slid his hand down and around to the back of her neck. Serenity"s eyes grew heavy with yearning and slowly closed as Dair finally pressed his lips to hers.
In that moment he was sure there must be a halleluiah chorus being sung somewhere because something so good could not possibly go uncelebrated. He felt her move, climbing up so that her body was pressed to his. Dair used his other arm to wrap it around her waist and pulled her on to his lap never breaking the kiss. Serenity sucked in a deep breath at the bold move and he took advantage of the open access she gave him by slipping his tongue into the warmth of her mouth. Dair had never kissed anyone before, but he was sure that it wouldn"t feel like that with anyone else. He was also sure that he would want to do it more often than not. His grip tightened on her neck as he deepened the kiss, needing to be closer to her, to somehow crawl inside of her and be a part of her. Was this what it meant to be one with your mate? As his hand slid up her back, pulling her tighter against him, his mind drifted to more intimate thoughts, and he realized that if kissing Serenity was this intense, he didn"t know how he could survive being more intimate with her, if that day were to ever come. He pulled away from her lips but not because he was in any way done with her. His lips traveled across her jaw and down her neck. Serenity"s head fell back, giving him access to her smooth skin, and he took full advantage of it. He knew it was getting time to stop, but as his lips and tongue tasted her flesh, Dair found that he couldn"t pull away. And when Serenity reached up and began running her fingers through his hair, he knew he was quickly reaching the point of no return.
When his hand slipped from her back and up to her collar, pushing it down further so he could trail kisses across the exposed flesh, he let out a low growl. "Princess, tell me to stop." To his surprised, and if he was honest, delight, Serenity didn"t tell him to stop but instead pulled his head closer and lower. Her chest rose and fell causing the swell of her breast to rise up and greet him with entirely too much eagerness. Dair ripped his mouth away from her and turned his head. His own breathing was unsteady, and his hand shook as he moved her collar back in place, covering the delicious skin that he so badly wanted to explore.
They were both quiet as they attempted to gather themselves. Dair hoped that Serenity wasn"t feeling rejected, because that was the furthest thing from his intentions. He simply was trying to protect her virtue. No man who would take something so precious before he made a woman his in the eyes of the Creator deserved such a gift. No matter how badly Dair wanted to claim Serenity in every way possible, he would not disrespect her in such a way.
"That was...unexpected."
He finally turned to meet her gaze. His brow drew together as his head tilted and he studied her. "Really? Because I was pretty confident that the pa.s.sion between us would be explosive and I do believe I was right." He loved the blush that covered her skin and loved the way the warmth of it felt against the hand that was still holding the back of her neck.
"I didn"t mean that; I just meant I didn"t realize what a floozy I was." She laughed a little. Dair could tell she was truly embarra.s.sed.
"Hey, look at me," he told her when she glanced away. Her eyes found his and he hoped she would see the sincerity in them when he spoke. "You have nothing to be embarra.s.sed about. I was very close to begging you to let me relieve you of these frustrating clothes so that I could make you mine in every way. If anyone should be embarra.s.sed or ashamed, it"s me. Given just a few moments longer, Princess, and my hands were going to begin wandering to places that should only be touched by your husband." She was speechless. Her mouth dropped open slightly and then closed only to repeat the action several more times. Dair chuckled and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. "Surely, you aren"t surprised to find out that you are so desirable."
"Well honestly, I"ve never cared whether a guy desired me."
"Is it cruel of me to be happy that you"ve never felt that way about another male?"
Serenity laughed. "Only if it"s cruel of me to be glad that considering your age, you"ve never been with other girls."
Dair wrapped both arms around her waist and pulled her closer to him, his larger form allowing him to lay his cheek against her hair. The floral scent of her shampoo was nice, but it was the scent beneath that, her scent, that had his mouth watering. Dair had never dealt with the feelings of desire and had to admit that he wasn"t exactly sure how to handle them. They were much more intense than he had ever imagined, and he truly wondered how mere mortals kept their control. His body nearly shook with need for her. Serenity pulled back to look up at him, a frown marring her beautiful face.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
"Aside from the fact that your body feels incredibly good against mine, your scent is making my mouth water like a man whose thirst hasn"t been quenched in a century, and everything inside of me is screaming for me to take you and to claim you like some primal beastyes, I"m okay." Her eyes widened at his declaration and he could tell she was struggling with how to respond.
"Perhaps, I should get off your lap," she suggested and started to move.
Dair tightened his grip on her and slowly shook his head. "I"m not ready to let you go." Those words meant so much more than just letting her climb back into bed and out of the shelter of his hold. He truly knew that he would never be ready to let her go. Dair realized then just how badly he wanted to be human, to have a human life span so that he could share it the Serenity. He wanted to marry her, love her, have babies with her, and grow old with her. There was a time when he wondered how humans could get into relationships knowing that their days together were numbered. They would not have an eternity together, and yet now he realized that it only made their love and commitment all the more precious. Two imperfect souls come togetherbecoming one and sharing joy, hurt, sorrow, love, and so much moreall the while never knowing if they will even have one more day together. They weren"t promised a tomorrow. Their days were appointed by the Creator, and though their lives on earth were not even close to the splendor that their home with their Creator would be, it was still priceless in its own right. The relationship between male and female, mate and mate, husband and wife was a precious gift. It was a covenant between the man and woman and their Creator. It was to be protected at all costs and to be nourished beyond all other relationshipssave the one they had with their Creator. And Dair wanted that with a desperation that scared him. He didn"t just want it with any female. He wanted it with Serenity, his princess, his love.
Serenity laid her head against Dair"s chest allowing the rhythm of his heart beat to soothe her. She felt raw and exposed after having experienced something so intense with Dair. Deep in her bones she could feel that what they had, what was building between them, was not an everyday sort of crush. It was deep, ardent, and all encompa.s.sing. As Dair"s lips had demanded her response, to which she more than happily answered, Serenity was sure she had felt their souls connect. Was it realistic? She didn"t know. Did it make any sense? Absolutely not. But there it was in all its unbelievable glory, a connection she had never felt with anyoneand knew she might never feel with anotherhad bridged itself between them. He had claimed he wasn"t ready to let her go, and she was far from ready for him to release her. She wanted to be sheltered in his arms forever and shielded from the dark things in the world. Dair made her feel safe for the first time since her parents" deaths. He made her feel treasured and adored. She didn"t know how she was going to handle it when he left, because she knew he would eventually have to leave. There was no two ways about it. Dair was immortal with a task appointed to him by the Creator and she was human. She just didn"t see a way that they could be together.
Serenity felt his hand slide down her hair to her back repeatedly petting her, comforting her as if he understood her pain. And maybe he could feel it the way she had felt his soul. Her arms slipped around his waist and his back muscle"s flexed against her hands. He was so strong, so solid, and she imagined if things were different he would be a man who stuck. He would be a man who would take a wife and never let her go. He would stick it out through every obstacle, every joy, and every pain, and he wouldn"t want them to just be surviving, he would want them to flourish. Dair would want there to be pa.s.sion and desire, want, and love. Yes, he would be a man who stuck, and yet she couldn"t have him.
"You have school tomorrow," he whispered into the dark room. "I need to let you get some rest."
"Will you stay?" The words were out before she could bite them back.
Dair stood up holding her in his arms as if she weighed no more than a child and laid her in her bed. He pulled the covers up to her chin and then walked around to the other side of the bed. To her surprise and delight, he laid down next to her, on top of the covers, and wrapped a strong arm around her midsection pulling her close to him.
"Dream of me, Princess," Dair whispered into her ear.
"Then weave me a dream, Sandman," she said softly, "and then we can dream together."
As her eyes grew heavy, she heard Dair"s voice telling her to sleep and to open her mind to him and to let him in. That was no hardship she thought as sleep finally claimed her.
Chapter 7.
"To see a squirrel in your dreams means that you will soon make one or more new friends. While you should take advantage of the opportunity, be wary of being too trusting too soon. Take care not to reveal the location of your stash of nuts."
Emma"s first day of school in Yellville wasn"t nearly as scary as she had first thought it would be. Of course it could be because of the huge angel, though invisible to everyone else, had stayed with her throughout the day making sure everything went smoothly. Emma had told him several times that she didn"t need a babysitter. Raphael"s response had been that maybe he would learn something too, since he had never gone to elementary school. She couldn"t imagine what an angel, who had been around since the dawn of time, could learn in the second grade, but then again she and her parents use to watch the show Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader and her parents got questions wrong all the time. So maybe the angel could learn something. She had to be careful not to talk to him though because it would look like she was talking to herself. It was bad enough that most people already knew that she was living in a shack with her drunk aunt; she didn"t want them thinking she was crazy as well. Emma could see the look in the teacher"s eyes, a look her mama would have said was pity, and it made her grit her teeth. She didn"t want anyone"s pity. Emma just wanted to be treated like a normal girl.
By lunch time she had met two girls who had the potential to be friends. Penny Jane and Charlotte had both seemed to take Emma under their wings.
"Do you have any brother or sisters?" Penny Jane asked as she pulled her sandwich and chips from her h.e.l.lo Kitty lunch box. Emma couldn"t help but look enviously at the sandwich, after having been unable to identify the slop on her tray that the school was trying to pa.s.s off as food. Realizing they were still waiting for an answer, Emma forced her eyes away from Penny Jane"s lunch.
"Nope, I"m an only child."
"That must be awesome," Charlotte said with awe in her voice. "I have six brothers and sisters. Six! And I"m number four so I never get anything new. All my clothes were worn by the older girls, all my toys were played with first by them, and even my hair brush used to be my older sister"s. It must be nice not to have to get used stuff."
Listening to Charlotte go on and on about her grievances, that was one of her vocabulary words her mom had constantly taught her, she couldn"t help but once again hear her mother"s voice. You remember to be thankful for whatever your circ.u.mstances, Emma Jean, because no matter how much you think you want something different, different doesn"t always equate to better. Her mother had been right. How many times had Emma wanted to move away from Memphis, away from the big city to a country house where she could have horses and rabbits? And here she was in a small, country town, and things were definitely not better.
Lunch continued with a constant flow of conversation from Charlotte and Penny Jane. She"d never seen two girls talk so fast. And half the time they finished each other"s sentences so the flow was never broken; they just kept right on going. Emma glanced at Raphael from the corner of her eye and nearly laughed when she saw him watching the two girls with wide eyes. It was obvious he hadn"t spent much time around eight-year-old girls. Poor guy didn"t know what he had signed on for.
By the end of the day, Emma was ready to get away from the stares from the teachers and the whispers and pointing from her immature cla.s.smates. Emma"s mama had always told her that being so smart was a blessing and a curse. It was a blessing because school was easy for her, almost too easy, but it was a curse because it made her an outsider. She often found it hard to be around kids her own age because they just seemed so clueless to her. Emma tried not to be judgmental, especially since it wasn"t their faults that their IQ levels probably didn"t come anywhere close to her own. They were simply products of their genetics, as was she. As she and Raphael exited the building, Emma took a deep breath letting the cold air fill her lungs. It was refreshing after being cooped up in the school all day.
"I don"t really want to go back to Mildred"s yet," she told Raphael as they started walking. Based on a few glances from other kids she knew that Raphael had made himself visible. She didn"t give envious glances to those getting into cars where there was heat, walking was her only mode of transportation unless she wanted to take the bus, which she didn"t. Walking was good for her she told herself anytime she wanted to whine about it. Be thankful you can walk, Emma Jean. That"s what her mama would say. Man, she missed her mama. It was as if a hole had been ripped in her heart where her mother used to be, and now her heart didn"t beat right anymore. The rhythm was off, like someone clapping to music but their hands met two beats too late. And Emma didn"t know if it would ever be right again.
"How about we go back to the library and see that nice librarian?" Raphael suggested.
Emma thought that sounded like a much better idea than going back to the house where her aunt lived. She couldn"t call it home. She had no home, not anymore.
"So, did you learn anything?" Emma finally asked Raphael as they crunched through the snow. Emma loved the sound of snow beneath her shoes. The crunching sound was somehow gratifying because when you walked in snow you could see your progress. If she looked back behind her, Emma would see her footprints in the compressed snow and be able to see how far she"d gone. Sometimes, when there was no snow, when the sidewalks were dry, walking felt unproductive, as if she were standing in one placegoing nowheresimply just moving her legs. Yes, she liked the snow beneath her shoes; she liked that, until new snow fell or others walked over her steps, physical proof would show that she had indeed gone somewhere. And for some reason it was important to her that she not remain stagnant, another vocabulary word from her mama. Her attention was drawn away from the crunching when Raphael began to answer.
"At first no, but then we went to lunch. There I learned that some eight-year-old girls have no need of air when they are talking."
Emma burst in to a fit of giggles that had her holding her side as Raphael paused with her on the sidewalk. The look of exasperation on his face only had her laughing more. When she finally gained some control of herself a single brow on Raphael"s face rose. "Are you quite done?"
"I"m about as done as a frozen Christmas turkey," Emma grinned.
"What exactly does that mean?"
"It means that I"ve not yet begun to laugh at your horrid expression over energizer bunny eight year olds."
"You don"t seem eight," Raphael pointed out.
Emma shrugged. "On paper, I"m more like twentyaccording to my test scores anyways." Emma continued to chuckle under her breath as they started off again. When they finally reached the library, she was pretty sure her toes were so frozen they just might break in half. She and Raphael stomped the snow from their shoes before entering the library. The warm air rushed over her as she walked into the foyer with Raphael on her heels. Emma was immediately greeted with a smile from Darla that was just as warm as the air filling the room.
"I was hoping you"d come back," Darla grinned as she rounded the counter with arms already open. Emma had figured out that Darla was a hugger. As the kind woman knelt down and wrapped her arms around her, Emma bit her lip to hold in the emotions that continually seemed to threaten her control. She used to get hugs every day. She used to come home to a smile and the chatter of her mama asking her all about the school day. But those days were just memories.
Darla pulled back and held Emma"s shoulders and studied her face. Emma met her eyes, having been taught to look at people when they were talking. "I don"t suppose you"d be willing to help me take care of a little problem would you, Emma?"
Emma considered that whatever problem Darla had, it was nothing compared to her aunt"s issues. "Sure, I can help."
"Yeah!" Darla exclaimed in a way that only she would be able to pull off as genuine. "I seemed to have baked too many cookies, and I would hate for them to go to waste."
Emma smiled up at the librarian. "Well, you"re in luck, Mrs. Darla, eating cookies just happens to be one of my best problem solving skills."
"None of that Mrs. stuff, it"s just Darla," she said with a wink and motioned for them to follow her.
An hour, and ten chocolate chip cookies too many, later, Emma sat helping Darla scan returned books back into the library reference system and place them on the recirculation cart which, Darla said, they would then use to return the books to their rightful place on the shelves. Emma was just happy to be doing something productive instead of hiding in the closet or talking to a mouse and a cat. She had decided the other night, when the mouse that shared her bedroom wall had stopped and stared at her as she spoke, that she definitely needed to get out more. Christmas music played from an old radio on the counter and she and Darla sang along. It was strangely comforting. Emma was pretty sure that if she didn"t have the library to come to everyday, her life would be miserable. It was bordering on that already, but that was only when she was at her aunt"s house.
Emma and Darla both looked up when the door to the library opened and in walked a girl Emma immediately recognized from her dream. It was Serenity in the flesh. She smiled a knowing smile at her and Emma knew that Serenity recognized her as well.