Frightening huh? Lila recalled her last encounter with the man. Indeed, she understood why anybody would fear him. That man is scarier than Lucifer. Then again, the later became kinder because of her mother. The hanyou realm, and that side, huh? Unlike the rest of her siblings, she inherited the blood the strongest. That"s why she is the heir to the family. Her sister nor her brothers cared about it, though. All of them expressed their concern, though."The hanyou side isn"t swayed easily either. But, for a long time now, many voiced their dissatisfaction against Mother. Even long before we"re born, such conflicts took place. Mother"s disappearance didn"t help either."
"That"s the thing, Lila," Arata mumbled. "All those people who wanted your mother dead or were dissatisfied with her are either retired. Or no longer in this world. The ones who are around now are their children, yes. But, those kids won"t disobey Sumire-san. The entire realm should be under your mother"s control. But it isn"t, Zane can enter that place freely and gain influence."
Lila didn"t say anything at first; even now, the cycle of conflict hasn"t changed. Even now, there are those who are suffering. The rest of the conversation seemed a blur to her.
It was quiet for a bit when Arata left. But that quietness faded when Haruka suggested they go outside. Lila was a bit surprised since he was mad about her going jogging earlier.
"Are you sure?" Lila asked.
Haruka smiled, "Let"s go on a date, wife."
Her eyes brightened at the words date, and she nodded happily.
___
Haruka drove for another two hours before coming to a halt. He glanced over at the black-haired girl who had fallen asleep. He wonders if she"s dreaming of something peaceful now. The past few days she"s been plagued with nothing but nightmares.
Haruka bends over and whispers, "Wife, we"ve arrived," he shook her shoulders lightly.
He stood up and got out of the car; as he shut the door, he hears shuffling by the time he reached the wall. The black-haired girl emerged from the car. She glanced around at the scenery in awe. He extended his hand out and pulled her up onto the wall. Despite the heavy snowfall here, it has yet to turn into ice, so the snow is still relatively smooth.
"It"s really beautiful, Haruka. It feels like we"re in a dream."
"Yeah, I knew you"d like it. When I was exploring the other day, I found it. Must be due to my excellent foresight."
Light laughter escaped the brunette"s lips, "You do use whatever opportunity you can get to compliment yourself."
Even more than touching her, to spend moments like her with this is something he prefers. For her to rest so comfortably in his hold like this, despite the cold, all he can feel is the warmth transmitting from her back. "When you take a look at this, you really can tell that it"s winter."
"It wasn"t so obvious before. But it is, that season already."
For the two of them, winter holds so many memories. Memories that connect together; and memories that differ from each other. It was winter when he confessed to her, and winter when they got together — Winter, when that person pa.s.sed away, winter when Sophia left him to pursue her dreams.
Winter containing fond and beautiful memories, as well as sad ones. Every time winter comes about, he feels as though the feelings he has towards her continue to increase. But for her every time winter comes around, it"s a trial, a test of her heart and emotions.
"Are you comfortable?" Haruka asked, noticing her s.h.i.+fting about in his arms.
"Yes... Am I being unfair right now?"
"Out of all the times, you ask that it"s in this situation where I"m barely touching you?" Aside from his arms that are wrapped around her waist, he isn"t touching her at all.
"Perhaps that"s why I"m saying it now," Lila trails off, "You know I probably won"t ever directly tell Kiryu that it"s over. I"ll probably never be able to say it"s all finished and get him to move on. I"m very bad at expressing my feelings, after all, even now, what I"m about to say is going to sound wishy-washy and half-hearted. But you"ll listen to me regardless, won"t you, Haruka?"
"Yeah."
It doesn"t matter how selfish she is.
"The reason I suddenly decided to pull off a solo live is because of the conversation I had with Yori. It was rather long and wordy, so I won"t repeat everything she said. But I shall tell you what words. .h.i.t me the most. To not feel guilty about my actions, and to not hold myself back anymore, to sing my feelings clearly. I wonder what it was, but after she said those words, I felt an emotional trigger of some sort.
I suppose that"s what you"d call my switch? I want to sing, to sing solo and let people hear my feelings. To everyone, to let my voice reach the vast ends of the universe. Feelings that I cannot understand myself let alone hope others would understand. But, whenever I sing his songs, I feel like I"m able to breathe again."
Even though he"s the one that caused her excess breath problem, but then again, he knew what was going to come out of this conversation is not something bitter, but nor is it exactly sweet. It"s filled with something that cannot be seen by the eye.
Haruka hesitated, but he vaguely asked, "What about my songs?"
"I don"t know."
He leaves it at that, afraid that if he pursues the topic anymore. Those ugly and dark feelings would emerge again. Once the brunette felt better, the two of them stood up and walked on the wall. For a while, there is nothing but silence between them. Whenever things are like this, Haruka racks his head, thinking about what he can do.
___
The kiss came suddenly out of nowhere. But it came at the right time, Lila felt the tears well up in her eyes again. That vague question Haruka about his songs. Lila didn"t know how to answer it. How could she possibly answer something like that? Wouldn"t it mean choosing between him and Kiryu? When it concerns her heart, she already chose Haruka over Kiryu. Does that mean she ought to give way, and chose Kiryu for her songs?
"What a stupid idea," Lila thought. It wouldn"t be fair on both Haruka and Kiryu, who are serious about writing songs for her when she chose Kiryu"s black and white sign. Lila hesitated slightly. For her, that song is very special, but Haruka"s gave off the same vibe too.
"Fuwahhh…"
The kiss grew more pa.s.sionate, and Lila felt her knees go weak. Haruka must have noticed since he wrapped it around his waist. "You okay, wife?" Haruka asked. Lila could only respond with short gasps as she rested her head on his shoulder. A chuckle pa.s.sed his lips, "Sorry, did I go, overboard?"
What an idiot, isn"t it obvious he went overboard? Then again for Karas.h.i.+ma Haruka, this is most likely not overboard for him. Lila shook her head, "I just need a few minutes."
And then what happens afterward? Will he kiss her again? Lila was looking forward to it.
"Mmm, my wife is amazing. She can keep up with my stamina."
If she had the strength, she would have hit him. "Is your purpose in life now to tease me or something?"