"Haruka, what did you just say?"Lila was unsure if she heard him correctly. Because there"s no way, he would say something like that. The guy who knew nothing about giving girls compliments; the one who had to seek Mikami"s advice on many matters since the two of them started dating.
Lila recalled a conversation they had when they first dated. She casually asked about the dress incidence last year, where she went through all that trouble to dress up for him. " It"s because you look always look good. It"s something that doesn"t need to be said right? It"s silently agreed on."
That"s right; that reason made enough sense to her. Even without words, they can properly convey their feelings with each other. About her wanting to live with him after she said she would go with him. She thought it was something he already understood.
Haruka repeated, "Tonight, become my wife is what I said."
Lila felt her cheeks burn, although this position alone was already enough to send her heart beating rapidly. But those words and the look in his eyes, piercing so deeply into her like that. He said "wife."
"Please stop teasing and joking with me," Lila murmured. Rather is this some new form of teasing of his? Lila knows that Haruka likes to tease her a lot.
He backed away from her slightly and frowned. She watched as he took out a cigarette packet from the drawer and lit it.
"Haruka?"
Haruka sighed and ran his cigarette-free hand through his hair in frustration. "Why would I joke with you about this?"
"Because um---"
"I don"t know how much you remember but, if it"s a proposal. You"re the one who proposed to me first."
Her cheeks heat up at his words. Actually, she remembers that, but it was only recently where she did. So Haruka, he"s seriously proposing? Lila grabbed the blanket and pulled it over her head. She wanted nothing more than to disappear. Wait, wait. Why is this happening? How did it turn out like this? M—more importantly, her heart is beating too fast.
Haruka appeared relaxed and elegant as he took another wif at his cigarette. Lila peeked through the blanket. He didn"t press her for an answer and seemed to be deep in thought.
Marry.
Come to think of it; she never discussed with Kiryu whether the engagement was over just because they broke up and were no longer a couple. It did not mean the engagement was over.
"You haven"t discussed this with Austin Kiryu yet, so I don"t want your response." Haruka clearly read her mind.
Lila pulled the blanket lower so she could look at him. Seeing his pained expression, Lila extended her hand out through the gap, "Hug?"
"...If I get close to you now, it will end up like how it did earlier. Do you want that?"
His question surprised her. Did she want it? Did she want him? That question is stupid. Of course, she wants him; she"s never desired anyone more than she has him. Her thoughts broke off when Haruka suddenly got close to her.
"H-Haruka?"
His fingers brushed against her lips, "I love you.." he murmured, "But recently I"m starting to understand. I don"t deserve you; I never did."
Deserve?
To become his wife.
To live with him. For the longest of time what Lila has probably desired the most is that, to have a family. Something she could never experience before. She was lonely in that household, although Kiryu and Akari sometimes came to speak and play with her, something was missing. It took her a long time, but when she finally figured it out, she thought, " Ah so that"s what it was." If Lila accepted Haruka"s hand now then she will be able to be with him truly; she would no longer have to separate from him. But, she can"t make that decision now.
Lila said nothing and just wrapped her arms around him, pulling him closer to her. For now, this is all she can do; she doesn"t know what to say. But, "I"m very happy," Lila whispered against his ear. She was happy, hearing those words from Haruka. To think she became this important to him.
Ah, his hands - they are cold. He"s afraid; he"s trembling. The reason he proposed, "You don"t want me to do my mission," Lila knew she was putting those words out there
Haruka hugged her tightly, "Yeah, you already found a miracle excuse for me not to accept job offers from the boss. So I thought I could do something for you."
Lila smiled at him, "Haruka, please believe in me," she extended her hands out to touch his face, "I can"t become devoured that easily. Teras.h.i.+ma Lila isn"t that weak of a woman."
That"s right, because if someone were to devour her.
That person would certainly be the one doing so.
"But using that way of protecting me I am very happy," Lila said. That"s right, even if he did say those words for this motive. It still made her happy. Because this entire time, she has wanted someone to say those words to her.
Feeling warmth across her cheeks, she turned to see him smiling softly at her, "Those words I just said I"m serious. I want us to become man and wife. Although from the looks of it I"ll have to postpone it," Haruka said sighing deeply.
Lila laughed, "En, but I"m glad. This time you"re the one who proposed."
Haruka rolled his eyes, "Technically I proposed then too."
Lila laughed.
He pulled her into his embrace, "I"d like to continue from before. But you"re tired. Rest for now Ari?"
"Thank you," Lila thanked him and snuggled up to his body.
Meeting Haruka and everyone else, she experienced a new form of happiness. Coming to Light Town and then England, Lila"s world has grown bigger. Her world has expanded, and even the corrupted parts of the world looked so beautiful to her. And being loved by Karas.h.i.+ma Haruka is one of the biggest miracles for her. If possible, she would like to tie herself to him truly. But that wish is not possible. Right now her body is still breaking down due to the effects of the darkness.
Unlike when she"s with Kiryu, Haruka can handle it. But eventually, it will start to affect him. Lila doesn"t want him to see it, doesn"t want Haruka seeing the her who ends up consumed in darkness. But Lila knew time was running out, she felt it with her body degrading every single day. Every single time she ends up sick like this, it acts as a sign for the end.
"Ari?"
Please, please just a bit longer. Lila wants to spend her days peacefully with this person. Please extend the time she has left before the darkness consumes her. Please don"t take away this person"s precious smile so soon. If she wishes for too many things, she will look greedy, but Lila could not summarise her wish into something short.