Dream Star

She won"t ever forget it, the moment she first saw Haruka"s weak side. "Haruka needs me more than Kiryu does." Lila took a deep breath, and she turned to Kiryu. She wonders if she can calmly have that talk with Kiryu now.

She spoke about becoming independent of him and all that. But in the end, just the mere thought of him actually leaving her side is painful. She is sorry, Kiryu. "I don"t blame him at all. If only I were honest with my feelings from the very start. Kiryu is always thanking me. He always expresses his grat.i.tude for everything I have done for him."

But she wonders if he knew exactly how grateful she is. Their meeting, she is so relieved they met back then even though she had her mother and Ren-san, something was missing.

"I"m sorry, Lila, you miss your father, don"t you?"

It may have been exactly that. She probably missed her father. Even though as a child, she only had vague recollections of him. The warmth of that person"s hand was something she always sought. Her mother noticed it. Even though she had been stubborn and denied it for so long, after she met Austin Kiryu, it felt like that whole in her heart filled up.

If she didn"t have Kiryu by her side when Ren-san left this world and when her mother left, then Lila is sure she would never have made it this far.

Perhaps if she continues to sing, she will one day meet Mother again. Those thoughts have supported her this entire seven years and helped get her where she is now. But what happens after? Mother returned now, even though the chances were slim before. Her mother is back now, and yet there are still many problems.

But her mother has proved that she won"t back away anymore, and she will fight through the pain. When Mother returned, Lila was worried about her for a while. She still seemed very strange. However, whenever she had such thoughts. Lila saw father hold mother tightly.

A comforting embrace and a gentle kiss from the person you love. For her mother, that was enough to calm her turbulent emotions.

What about her? What does she truly desire? Does she desire for someone to hold her tight? Or does she desire for an affectionate kiss? To be held until her body and thoughts are dizzy with only thoughts about that person? If that"s what she wants, then doesn"t she have it already?

Haruka gives her that every day, he gives her so much love.

….

It was past midnight when she realized Haruka was gone. "Kiryu is very good at distracting people." But, maybe she went along with it. Did Kiryu think she would get upset? "What a foolish guy." Lila knew Haruka would leave; eventually, he is always busy. Lila doesn"t ask him where he rushes off to anymore. From their last serious discussion, it was clear.

Lila slowly made her way down the steps. She weakly drags herself.

Her entire body was in so much pain. She felt so hot like she would burst into flames.

But none of that made any difference to her. Lila knew she had to go to him. Haruka is surely nearby; he must have come back. After reaching the end of the stairwell, she eventually found who she was looking for. Haruka sat crouched down at the end of the corridor.

"Haruka."

Haruka looked up with a bitter smile. "How is Kiryu?"

Lila clenched her fist. "So he was watching?" What a sly and cruel person. Was he trying to test her?

"Back then, all I wanted money, social status, and fame. I thought that there wouldn"t be anything I couldn"t do if only I had those things. But at the time, the conditions were very harsh. No matter how much I wanted to, I couldn"t escape. At the time, I felt as though it was the same whether I died or not. No matter how many connections I made with people, none of it could fill the gap in my heart."

Ah, so this is the bomb that"s been hidden inside him this entire time. He finally exploded. So many dark and negative emotions are filling this room, surrounding and consuming him now. She doesn"t have to use her powers to tell. This person has been suffering this entire time.

He"s always been all alone in this world. Even when he grasps some form of light, it slips out from his hands so quickly. The moment he becomes attached, it vanishes. Haruka is similar to her.

"I don"t care about anything anymore. I"m exhausted."

If…if she returns to Kiryu now, he will hold her and tell her it will be fine. But if she does, she"s sure that he will disappear and she may never see this person again. This person…she at least wants to give him something…

Lila bent down and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I still love only you," Lila mumbled.

"Is that so?"

"Yes." She said softly. "Do you find it strange that I still have feelings for you after everything?"

"Sorry." Haruka apologized. "Earlier, you looked so happy with Austin Kiryu, so I thought that maybe I ought to let you go."

"You know that would make me angry." Lila trailed off. "I want to leave this town with you soon."

"Are you sure? I know you"re attached to this place."

"This place is filled with so many memories. I"ve always liked being high up, from a high place I can see the view of the town. One of my favourite views of the town is from the waterbus. I loved the way the town looked from there, I was so close to everyone and yet something separated me from them. I think I know what that something is now.." she gently placed a kiss on Haruka"s neck. "For me, this place wasn"t enough; it was only a small fraction of what I wanted. I want to see the world, meet different people, and fall in love with the same person over and over again."

"Lila.. sorry, sorry," Haruka mumbled. "From now on, I will tell you everything. So don"t, don"t leave me."

"I could never leave you. I love you so much."