I could tell by his expression that he wasn"t really expecting me to take anything back.
"Yes, well about that. I really haven"t changed my mind. And I think I might have sorted out another job in New York. And it"s just going to take a lot of organization to move and adjust and sort everything here and as it"s the beginning of a year, I don"t have much work to do at the moment and I was wondering if you could at all think about whether you actually could see if you could perhaps-"
"Take a breath! You"re usually a lot more eloquent than this, Anna," Paul said, grinning at me. "You don"t want to work your full notice period?"
I nodded.
"Is it a law firm you"re going to in New York?"
"No, General Counsel of Palmerston Hotels, I think. Nothing"s finalized yet."
Paul nodded. "Sounds interesting, Anna. Well, it"s not a compet.i.tor and it is quiet in terms of work at the moment. We"re expecting a busy quarter though. Let me have a think about it and I"ll talk to some of the other partners and come back to you."
"Thank you so much. Anything you could do, I would really appreciate."
I practically skipped out of the office and down the corridor. That sounded hopeful. It would be great if I had news before the next time I spoke to Ethan.
Usually, the first week in January was all about catching up with colleagues and avoiding doing any work for as long as possible, but I set about compiling lists of things I had to do before I left. If they told me I didn"t have to work my notice, I wanted to be able to go as quickly as possible. My secretary was going to hate me because she was going to be a.s.s deep in filing by lunchtime.
By midday I still hadn"t heard from Ethan, so I sent him another text.
A: Spoke to Paul. He"s thinking about it. I"m hopeful. I love you.
SG: Good. Hung over, speak later. Love you.
Hung over? Ethan was never hung over. Where had he been last night?
Before I had a chance to ask him, Lucy barged into my office. "A little bird told me you were leaving," she said.
"Yes, that"s right." I really wanted to be able to tell her that I was moving in with Ethan Scott, the object of her l.u.s.t for the previous four months. But there was no point in making things difficult for Ethan.
"Have you been made an offer you can"t refuse? I hear some firms are offering twenty percent raises to move. Have you got a good deal?"
"I"m not moving for the money. I"m going to New York."
"New York?" she spat out.
I nodded.
"To work?"
Lucy wouldn"t be someone from London I missed.
"And live, yes."
"You have a job in New York?"
"Yes."
"Well, I might be out there, too. I work so closely with Ethan that I"m bound to get the secondment I"ve applied for," she announced.
I raised my eyebrow and then grinned because I"d caught that move from Ethan. "Good luck with that," I said.
"Wouldn"t that be great? In New York together, doing the single girl thing?"
"But maybe you"d be dating Ethan by then?" I added. It was mean and I shouldn"t have said it but I couldn"t resist.
"That"s a good point. I"d probably be busy accompanying him to parties or dinners. I"m sure I could squeeze you in at some point."
"Well, you just let me know, Lucy. You"ll have to excuse me, I have to make a call."
Lucy spun around and stalked out of my office.
I spent the rest of the day working hard. My heart and mind were somewhere else now and I wanted my body to catch up.
When I left at seven thirty, there were few people left. Most of my colleagues were making the most of their clients still being distracted by the holiday season and leaving the office early.
I was headed to dinner with Leah. London was cold but not as cold as New York. The thought made me realize I"d still not heard from Ethan. I pulled out my phone and dragged off my glove so I could more easily dial his number.
He didn"t answer, so I hung up without leaving a message. Then I decided that maybe I wanted to leave a message and tell him that I"d spoken to Paul, so I dialed him again.
He answered on the second ring. "Anna? What is it?"
"Nothing, I was expecting your voicemail. I just called and you didn"t pick up."
"I"m in the middle of a meeting. I can"t just pick up." He sounded p.i.s.sed off and stressed.
"I know. I didn"t mean to interrupt." I paused, wanting him to say something but he didn"t. "I was just going to leave you a message."
"Well, I"ve picked up now, so what is it?"
He"d never been so short with me. So cold. It winded me and left me grasping for words. "Nothing, I just . . . I spoke to Paul and I think he was open about my notice period. But it"s not urgent. We can talk about it this evening."
"Fine. I"ll call you later if I get a chance. Today"s going to be very busy. I gotta go."
"Okay, bye, I love you."
"Later."
"Ethan?"
"Yes?"
"Are you okay?"
"Yes, busy."
"Okay," I said, and then he was gone.
I found that I"d stopped walking and I was standing with commuters rushing each side of me. What had just happened? Even when Ethan was busy and stressed with work he was never like that with me. He was never rude or snappy. Maybe Al had reported him for breaching the frat policy? But why would he be mad at me?
Something felt wrong.
I typed out a text.
A: I"m worried about you. You sound stressed. Would a naked picture help?
That would cheer him up surely? I smiled to myself and buried my phone back in my pocket and continued my walk to meet Leah at the restaurant.
Chapter Twelve.
Ethan I"d snapped at Anna and I hated myself for it. I was being an a.s.shole. But I couldn"t shake the black cloud that had settled over me, and part of me blamed her for it. I kept telling myself that it was my hangover, but I knew better. Was it such big deal that she didn"t want to marry me? It shouldn"t be. We could be happy together without being married, surely. But somehow and suddenly, it had become a big deal.
Anna "Daniel"s just popped to the loo. Is it okay that he came?" Leah asked as she poured white wine into an empty gla.s.s opposite me at the restaurant.
"Of course." I would have preferred just Leah and me for dinner. Not that I didn"t adore Daniel, but it was always slightly different when it was the three of us.
"Are you okay?" Leah asked.
"Yeah, I just-Ethan"s stressed and he was a bit snappy with me on the phone. I know I"m being over sensitive, he"s just never been like that with me and it just makes it worse when he"s so far away." My throat began to thicken and I took a sip of my wine. "Maybe it"s all getting a bit too real for him and he"s having doubts?"
"He"s crazy for you. He"s not having doubts. It will be fine. Talk to him later."
Daniel came back to the table and kissed me on the cheek. "What"s going on?" he asked. Have you got a moving date?"
"I"m still waiting to hear. I spoke to Paul earlier and he"s going to come back to me, but he sounded positive about it."
"I"m going to miss you so much," Leah said.
"G.o.d, Leah don"t. The mood I"m in, I"ll start bawling and you"ll have to carry me home."
Daniel pulled a glum looking Leah toward him. "I go to New York all the time-you can just come with me. You"ll see plenty of each other."
"The mood Ethan"s in, he"ll probably call it all off and I"ll be stuck here anyway."
"Don"t be silly," Leah said. "He was going to propose, I"m sure of it." Leah then proceeded to tell Daniel about our New Year"s Eve and how Ethan had hired out the top of the Empire State Building. "Don"t you think it"s the sort of thing you do when you propose?" Leah asked him.
"He didn"t though?" Daniel asked.
I shook my head. "Just because he did something thoughtful and romantic doesn"t mean he was going to ask me to marry him. And anyway, I have no interest in getting married."
"You don"t?" Daniel looked surprised.
"No, not really. I"ve never seen the point. So many people end up unhappy or divorced. Isn"t it more romantic to stay together because you want to, rather than because you signed a bit of paper?"
Daniel looked at me, almost as if he were concerned.
"And anyway, guys hate the idea of marriage," I continued.
"Well, I"m a guy and I don"t hate the idea of marriage," Daniel said. "I think it"s important to be able to say to the world and each other that you love someone, and you"re committing the rest of your lives together. I don"t know how I"d feel if Leah didn"t want to marry me. It"s true, I don"t care at all for the wedding, but the wedding and being married are two different things."
"Yeah, but you"re Daniel Armitage. You"re not most guys."
"Is Ethan most guys?" Leah asked.
"I don"t even know why we"re talking about this. He hasn"t asked me. We didn"t talk about it and after our conversation today we"re never likely to." I surrept.i.tiously checked my phone. He"d not even responded to the naked photo offer. Something must be up.
"Well, the top of the Empire State building for just the two of you on New Year"s Eve sounds like he wants you to be happy," Daniel said. "And that can only be a good thing."
Back at the flat, I"d still not heard from Ethan. I wanted to call him but I didn"t want to disturb him again. I decided to give Mandy a call instead. It would be about six in New York, so she was likely to be home and Andrew would still be at work.
"Hey, soon-to-be New Yorker," Mandy squealed as she answered the phone.
I couldn"t help but smile. "Hey, I called to wish you happy New Year. Is now a good time?"
"Of course. Happy New Year. I"m so pleased you called. How"s the jetlag? Have you got a date for moving yet?"
"No date, but I"m hopeful I won"t have to work the full three months. I should hear in the next few days. I"ve started to pack things up in the office though, and I"ll start on the flat tomorrow."
"You don"t sound excited."
I didn"t feel it. I felt heavy. "Well, you know there"s a lot to do."
"Ethan is desperate to get you over here as soon as possible."
"Hmmm, maybe."
"What do you mean "maybe"? Of course he is. The man would do anything for you. He"s head over heels."
"He didn"t sound it earlier. I think we just had our first argument. Or maybe we didn"t and I"m just overreacting."
"What did you argue about? New Year"s?"
"No, and what about New Year"s?"
"What were you arguing about then?"
"He was just snappy with me, and told me I was disturbing him and that he had a hangover. But what about New Year"s?" Was she deliberately avoiding my question?