Chapter 1397 - Matters of the Heart
Shortly after calling the emergency council to a close, Vahn found himself back in his chambers with only Artoria and Mordred at his side. Even Gray had taken upon herself to step out for a moment as, while her status allowed her to be present for such things, she rarely stuck around for family matters.
Even without asking, Vahn already had an idea about what was troubling Mordred. It was something he and Artoria had talked about at length in the past so, after taking a seat, Vahn asked, "Tell me, do you regret becoming my daughter?"
Without any delay in her response, Mordred adopted a serious expression on her face as she stated, "There is no way that could ever be the case! Chichiue is an excellent father, someone I respect with all my heart...!!"
Hearing Mordred"s instant reply, Vahn couldn"t help but smile appreciatively but, taking advantage of her word choice, he added, "Not all your heart, I fear...there is a part that views me in a different light, is there not?"
Though she already expected this line of questioning, Mordred paled slightly, her head hanging low as her bangs covered her eyes. At the same time, she balled her hands into fists, words escaping her as she didn"t know the "correct" way to respond to such a question.
Just as Mordred"s eyes began to swim around for an excuse, she was liberated from her stupefied trance by a soft and warm hand being placed on her shoulder. When she looked up, she found her Hahaue smiling gently toward her and, though there was a complicated look visible in her eyes, she still whispered, "Calm down, Mordred. You should know better than most...your father isn"t someone you should fear."
Artoria wanted to say something to support her daughter but, understanding exactly what it was the latter wanted, she, too, was at a loss for words. After all, depending on how things went, there was a very good chance she would be losing her daughter in the near future.
If she were forced to admit her innermost thoughts, Artoria wouldn"t be able to deny that the last few years, while filled with various troubles but, had been incredibly fulfilling. She had learned from her failings as a Father and King and, though she believed she still had a long way to go, she liked to think she had become a capable Mother and Empress. Now, however, even though she had seen this coming for a long time, she couldn"t help but feel a small amount of anguish as, in a way, she had, once again, failed Mordred...
Seeing the struggle in her Hahaue"s eyes, Mordred"s feelings of guilt began to increase exponentially but, before she could say anything, a firm yet guiding voice reached her ears, calling her name and drawing her attention. Though she had known where the voice originated from, Mordred was still at a loss as, rather than conflict and struggle, her Chichiue had a calm and accepting look on his face. His smile didn"t seem forced and, rather than judgment or disappointment in his eyes, he looked at her the same way he always had, like a father trying to guide his daughter through her struggles...
Though she would normally feel better just having her Chichiue smile at her, Mordred"s feelings of guilt made it hard to even look at him, much less smile in turn. She hated that she couldn"t control her own emotions properly and, as a result, she was on the verge of destroying everything that had made her happy in life. She felt lower than the greedy and depraved men and women that made up the vast majority of the human race as, even after obtaining happiness, she couldn"t help but want even more...just like the people she hated most.
Sensing a palpable increase in Mordred"s negative emotions, Vahn"s smile faded slightly as he firmly said, "Mordred, raise your head.", drawing her eyes back to him. Then, before she could sink further into an ocean of negativity, he explained, "You have made a lot of progress over these last few years. Even if I locked myself away into a [s.p.a.ce-Time Orb], no amount of time would be adequate to put into words how grateful I feel towards you. Being a father is the greatest purpose I have ever found and, seeing how much you have grown over the last three years, it fills me with hope and gives me the confidence to walk my own path..."
Hearing her Chichiue"s words, Mordred"s emotions began waging a war within her mind but, on the surface, she did her best to appear calm and attentive. She would normally be beside herself with glee to hear him say such things but, due to the circ.u.mstances, it felt like metal stakes were being driven into her heart. Though she had a few expectations about how things were meant to go, no amount of mental imaging could have prepared her for this increasingly tense conversation. It was comparable to the feelings she had felt while facing her Hahaue down in her past life, something she never wanted to experience a second time.
As he had been closely gauging Mordred"s reaction, Vahn fought to prevent his smile from turning awry. He knew Mordred had never been the type to indulge flowery words and long explanations so, in the hopes her downward spiral would cease, he released a tired sigh within his mind while raising three fingers, explaining, "There are three choices available to you. Though these are not the only three, they are what your mother and I came up with after a number of long discussions...I hope you will properly consider your choices before making a decision."
Seeing that her now had Mordred"s undivided attention, Vahn gave an appreciative node before holding up one finger and explaining, "Your first option is to change your status from First Imperial Princess to First Imperial Prince. Before my meddling, you always identified as a man and I"ve seen how you interact with Fenrir, Mash, and Astrid. If you pursue this path, you will live the rest of your life as a man and, when the time comes, I will directly prepare you to rule in my stead."
Though she expected any number of things, Mordred hadn"t even considered the possibility she would be offered the chance to become a man. For a brief moment, her mind drew a complete blank as, in more ways than one, it was something she had always desired. Prior to being "reborn", she had even considered the fact she had been born a female as a kind of curse. Though it helped that her "father" had also been female, making her feel a lot closer to the person she had most respected, she still had the mentality than men were, in many ways, superior.
While Mordred"s mind was still drawing a blank, Vahn held up a second finger, pulling her back to reality as he explained, "Your second option is to continue fulfilling your duties as Imperial Princess, increasing your status and prestige through your own efforts. This is similar to your current path but, towards the end, I can promise you something beyond your current ambitions. Rather than be the Emperor of one world, I will nurture you to become a being above even the G.o.ds. If you choose this path...becoming a G.o.ddess, you will be able to stay at my side for eternity, helping me to shape, not just one world, but countless worlds. Also, as the standards for G.o.ds are completely different than those of mortals, I will...take you as one of my wives..."
Hearing her Chichue"s final words, Mordred"s breathing became audible and, though she managed to retain her composure, it was easy to see how much they had affected her. She was the type that always sought to rise above, gaining even greater power and authority. Being told she would be able to become a literal G.o.ddess, ruling over countless worlds, there was no way she could ignore such an opportunity. Though it was true that she could have always followed this route, the same could be said for becoming a male as, so long as she earnestly desired something, her Chichiue would not deny her...
As this thought crossed her mind, so too did Mordred"s awareness of her current situation. From the very beginning, her Chichiue had only been listing out options that had always been available to her, not special deals that would come and go if she refused them. If she really wanted, creating a fourth, fifth, or even a hundredth option was possible. The only thing he really cared about was that she was happy and, so long as it didn"t interfere with the happiness of others, she was free to choose at her leisure.
In timing with this conclusion, Vahn held up his third finder, adopting a somewhat wry smile as he added, "The third option is the easiest, really...you give up your status as Imperial Princess, denounce our parent-child relations.h.i.+p, and follow a path similar to Illya. Truthfully, there is very little difference between your situation and hers. I would be a hypocrite if I refused you for no better reason than my ongoing relations.h.i.+p with your mother. In a way, your situation is even less complicated as, in much the same way as Gray, you were born into...unique circ.u.mstances."
Hearing the third option provided, Mordred fought hard to prevent herself from laughing out loud, even as tears began to build in her eyes. It was both funny yet surprisingly painful to be reminded of the fact that she could always just throw away her status. Though her Chichiue treated her with the care and concern of an actual parent, they weren"t truly related and, if she chose to be selfish and pursue her desires, the seemingly unbreakable bond they had forged as parent and child would be shattered in an instant. This thought was liberating but, at the same time, Mordred couldn"t help feeling indescribable anguish...
Seeing Mordred fighting back tears with an awkward smile on her face, Vahn"s own heart felt pained so, instead of discussing the matter further, he patted his right thigh and said, "Come, sit.", in a soft and gentle tone. As a result, he found himself practically tackled by the still armor-clad Mordred as, for reasons she couldn"t put into words, she began crying her heart out. Shortly after, Artoria came to sit at her side and, for the better part of twenty minutes, they comforted the crying Mordred as a Mother and Father should...
---
Though she hated crying, Mordred couldn"t deny that she always felt much better afterward. Her body felt lighter and, as she almost exclusively cried around her parents, there was always a soothing warmth that came along with it. She would never admit it but she enjoyed being pampered as, prior to her "rebirth", Mordred had never been able to experience anything like the care and concern of a parent...
After calming down enough to organize her thoughts, Mordred broke the silence by sitting straight and declaring, "I refuse to give up my status as your daughter. I thought I would be happy being one of your women but I won"t abandon everything I have worked for just to become one of many. I will become much stronger, strong enough to lay even G.o.ds low in a single blow. Then, no matter how much time pa.s.ses, we will always be together...as family...and much more..."
Mordred"s words were directed to both of her parents but, as she was sitting on her Chichiue"s lap, it was hard not to stare directly into his eyes. They held a force that seemed to draw others in and, at times, Mordred had wanted to swim within their depths. With this in mind, she decided to just throw propriety aside for a brief moment and, knowing it would probably be the last time for many years, she wrapped her arms around her Chichiue"s neck and claimed his lips as compensation for, well, a lot of things...
(A/N: Alternate t.i.tles: "Not your average family tensions...","The choice is yours...","Prelude to the Dragon"s rise (UwU)...!")
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