So the game goes on after Mary has chosen a new John.
GOING TO JERUSALEM
This is a piano game, but does not require great skill. One person goes to the piano, while the others arrange in a line as many chairs, less one, as there are players, the chairs alternately facing opposite directions. Then, as the pianist begins to play, the others commence marching around the line of chairs, keeping time to the music. When this suddenly ceases, everybody tries to sit down, but as there is one less chair than players, somebody is left standing, and must remain out of the game. Then another chair is removed, and the march continues, until the chairs decrease to one, and the players to two.
Whichever of these succeeds in seating himself as the music stops, has won the game.
"WHAT D"YE BUY?"
This game may be played by any number from three to thirteen. There are a dozen good-sized pieces of cardboard, each bearing a colored ill.u.s.tration of one of the "trades" following, viz.: a milliner, a fishmonger, a greengrocer, plumber, a music-seller, a toyman, mason, a pastry-cook, a hardware-man, a tailor, a poulterer, and a doctor.
Besides these there are a number of smaller tickets, half a dozen to each trade. Each of these has the name of the particular trade, and also the name of some article in which the particular tradesman in question may be considered to deal. A book accompanies the cards, containing a nonsense story, with a blank at the end of each sentence.
One of the players is chosen as leader, and the others each select a trade, receiving the appropriate picture, and the six cards containing the names of the articles in which the tradesman deals. He places his "sign" before him on the table, and holds the remainder of his cards in his hand. The leader then reads the story, and whenever he comes to one of the blanks, he glances towards one of the other players, who must immediately, under penalty of a forfeit, supply the blank with some article he sells, at the same time laying down the card bearing its name. The incongruity of the article named with the context make the fun of the game, which is heightened by the vigilance which each player must exercise in order to avoid a forfeit. Where the number of players is very small, each may undertake two or more trades.
We will give an ill.u.s.tration. The concluding words indicate the trade of the person at whom the leader glances to fill up a given hiatus.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I propose to relate some curious adventures which befell me and my wife Peggy the other day, but as I am troubled with a complaint called "Non mi ricordo," or the "Can"t remembers,"
I shall want each of you to tell me what you sell; therefore, when I stop and look at one of you, you must be brisk in recommending your goods. Whoever does not name something before I count "three" must pay a forfeit. Attention!
"Last Friday week I was awakened very early in the morning by a loud knocking at my door in Humguffin Court. I got up in a great fright, and put on"--(looks at Toyman, who replies, "A fool"s cap and bells,"
and lays down that card).
"When I got downstairs, who should be there but a fat porter, with a knot, on which he carried"--(Poulterer) "a pound of pork sausages."
""Hallo!" said I, "my fellow, what do you want at this time of day?" He answered"--(Fishmonger) ""A cod"s head and shoulders.""
""Get along with you," I said; "there"s my neighbor, Dr. Drenchall, I see, wants""--(Butcher) ""a sheep"s head.""
"I now went up to shave, but my soap-dish was gone, and the maid brought me instead"--(Milliner) "a lady"s chip hat."
"My razor had been taken to chop firewood, so I used"--(Greengrocer) "a cuc.u.mber."
"I then washed my face in"--(Doctor) "a cup of quinine," "cleaned my teeth with"--(Fishmonger) "a fresh herring," and "combed my hair with"--(Pastrycook) "a jam tart."
"My best coat was taken possession of by p.u.s.s.y and kittens, so I whipped on"--(Hardware-man) "a dripping pan."
"The monkey, seeing how funny I looked, s.n.a.t.c.hed off my wig, and clapped on my head"--(Poulterer) "a fat hen."
"I now awoke my wife, and asked her what she had nice for breakfast; she said"--(Doctor) "a mustard plaster."
"Then I scolded Sukey, the servant, and called her"--(Poulterer) "a tough old turkey."
"But she saucily told me I was no better than"--(Music-seller) "an old fiddle."
"I soon had enough of that, so I asked my wife to go with me to buy"--(Tailor) "a pair of trousers."
"But she said she must have her lunch first, which consisted of----"
etc., etc., through half a dozen pages, the tradesmen supply more or less appropriate articles to fill up the gaps in the discourse.
CHAPTER V.
RAISIN TORTOISE--LEMON PIG--SEASICK Pa.s.sENGER--ENCHANTED RAISINS--LUMP OF SUGAR--MYSTERIOUS PRODUCTION--FAMILY GIANT
THE RAISIN TORTOISE
This n.o.ble animal is constructed as follows: A muscatel raisin forms the body, and small portions of the stalk of the same fruit the head and legs. With a little judgment in the selection of the pieces of stalk and the mode in which they are thrust into the body, it is surprising what a life-like tortoise may be thus produced. While the work of art in question is being handed round on a plate for admiration, the artist may further distinguish himself, if the wherewithal is obtainable, by constructing
THE LEMON PIG
The body of the pig consists of a lemon. The shape of this fruit renders it particularly well adapted for this purpose, the crease or shoulder at the small end of the lemon being just the right shape to form the head and neck of the pig. With three or four lemons to choose from, you cannot fail to find at least one which will answer the purpose exactly. The mouth and ears are made by cutting the ring with a penknife, the legs of short ends of lucifer matches, and the eyes either of black pins, thrust in up to the head, or grape stones.
THE SEASICK Pa.s.sENGER
The requirements for this touching picture are an orange, a pocket handkerchief or soft table napkin, and a narrow water goblet. The orange is first prepared by cutting in the rind with a penknife the best ears, nose, and mouth which the artist can compa.s.s, a couple of raisin-pips supplying the place of eyes. A pocket handkerchief is stretched lightly over the gla.s.s, and the prepared orange laid thereon.
The pocket-handkerchief is then moved gently backward and forward over the top of the gla.s.s, imparting to the orange a rolling motion, and affording a laughable but striking caricature of the agonies of a seasick pa.s.senger.
THE ENCHANTED RAISINS
Take four raisins or bread-pills, and place them about a foot apart, so as to form a square on the table. Next fold a couple of table-napkins, each into a pad of five inches square. Take one of these in each hand, the fingers undermost and the thumb uppermost. Then inform the company that you are about to give them a lesson in the art of hanky-panky, etc., and in the course of your remarks, bring down the two napkins carelessly over the two raisins farthest from you.
Leave the right-hand napkin on the table, but, in withdrawing the hand, bring away the raisin between the second and third fingers, and at the same moment remarking, "You must watch particularly how many raisins I place under each napkin." Lift the left napkin (as if merely to show that there is one raisin only beneath it), and transfer it to the palm of the outstretched right hand, behind which the raisin is now concealed. Without any perceptible pause, but at the same time without any appearance of haste, replace the folded napkin on raisin No. 2, and in so doing, leave raisin No. 1 beside it. Now take up raisin No.
3 (with the right hand). Put the hand under the table, and in doing so get raisin No. 3 between the second and third fingers, as much behind the hand as possible. Give a rap with the knuckles on the underside of the table, at the same time saying, "Pa.s.s!" and forthwith pick up the left-hand napkin with the left hand, showing the raisins 1 and 2 beneath it. All eyes are drawn to the two raisins on the table, and as the right hand comes into sight from beneath the table, the left quietly transfers the napkin to it, thereby effectually concealing the presence of raisin No. 3. The napkin is again laid over raisins 1 and 2, and No. 3 is secretly deposited with them. No. 4 is then taken in the right hand, and the process repeated, when three raisins are naturally discovered, the napkin being once more replaced, and No. 4 left with the rest. There are now four raisins under the left-hand napkin, and none under that on the right hand, though the spectators are persuaded that there is one under the latter, and only three under the former. The trick being now practically over, the performer may please himself as to the form of the denouement, and, having gone through any appropriate form of incantation, commands the imaginary one to go and join the other three, which is found to have taken place accordingly.
THE DEMON LUMP OF SUGAR
The performer commences by borrowing two hats, which he places, crowns upward, upon the table, drawing particular attention to the fact that there is nothing whatever under either of them. He next demands the loan of the family sugar basin, and requests some one to select from it a lump of sugar (preferably one of an unusual and easily distinguished shape), at the same time informing them that, by means of a secret process, only known to himself, he will undertake to swallow such lump of sugar before their eyes, and yet, after a few minutes"
interval, bring it under either of the two hats they may choose. The company, having been prepared by the last trick to expect some ingenious piece of sleight-of-hand, are all on the _qui vive_ to prevent any subst.i.tution of another lump of sugar, or any pretence of swallowing without actually doing so. However, the performer does unmistakably take the identical lump of sugar chosen and crushes it to pieces with his teeth. He then asks, with unabated confidence, under which of the two hats he shall bring it, and, the choice having been made, places the chosen hat on his own head, and in that way fulfills his undertaking.
THE MYSTERIOUS PRODUCTION
This is another feat of the _genus_ "sell," and to produce due effect, should only be introduced after the performer has, by virtue of a little genuine magic, prepared the company to expect from him something a little out of the common. He begins by informing the spectators that he is about to show them a great mystery, a production of nature on which no human being has ever yet set eye, and which, when they have once seen, no human being will ever set eyes on again. When the general interest is sufficiently awakened, he takes a nut from the dish, and, having gravely cracked it, exhibits the kernel, and says, "Here is an object which you will admit no human being has ever seen, and which"
(here he puts it into his mouth and gravely swallows it) "I am quite sure n.o.body will ever see again."
THE FAMILY GIANT
A very fair giant, for domestic purposes, may be produced by the simple expedient of seating a young lad astride on the shoulders of one of the older members of the company, and draping the combined figure with a long cloak or Inverness cape. The "head" portion may, of course, be "made up" as much as you please, the more complete the disguise the more effective being the giant. A ferocious-looking moustache and whiskers will greatly add to his appearance. If some ready-witted member of the party will undertake to act as showman, and exhibit the giant, holding a lively conversation with him, and calling attention to his gigantic idiosyncrasies, a great deal of fun may be produced.
The joke should not, however, be very long continued, as the feelings of the "legs" have to be considered. If too long deprived of air and light they are apt to wax rebellious, and either carry the giant in the directions he would fain avoid, or even occasionally to strike together, and bring the giant"s days to a sudden and undignified termination.
CHAPTER VI
THE WHAT-DO-YOU-THINK?--KNIGHT OF THE WHISTLE--"CAN DO LITTLE"-- THROWING LIGHT