Perhaps it was generally known, and perhaps it was thought that he had come to win Rose for his worldly advantage! The idea was overwhelmingly new to him. Up started self-love in arms. He would renounce her.
It is no insignificant contest when love has to crush self-love utterly.
At moments it can be done. Love has divine moments. There are times also when Love draws part of his being from self-love, and can find no support without it.
But how could he renounce her, when she came forth to him,--smiling, speaking freshly and lightly, and with the colour on her cheeks which showed that she had done her part? How could he retract a step?
"I have told Mama, Evan. That"s over. She heard it first from me."
"And she?"
"Dear Evan, if you are going to be sensitive, I"ll run away. You that fear no danger, and are the bravest man I ever knew! I think you are really trembling. She will speak to Papa, and then--and then, I suppose, they will both ask you whether you intend to give me up, or no. I"m afraid you"ll do the former."
"Your mother--Lady Jocelyn listened to you, Rose? You told her all?"
"Every bit."
"And what does she think of me?"
"Thinks you very handsome and astonishing, and me very idiotic and natural, and that there is a great deal of bother in the world, and that my n.o.ble relatives will lay the blame of it on her. No, dear, not all that; but she talked very sensibly to me, and kindly. You know she is called a philosopher: n.o.body knows how deep-hearted she is, though. My mother is true as steel. I can"t separate the kindness from the sense, or I would tell you all she said. When I say kindness, I don"t mean any "Oh, my child," and tears, and kisses, and maundering, you know. You mustn"t mind her thinking me a little fool. You want to know what she thinks of you. She said nothing to hurt you, Evan, and we have gained ground so far, and now we"ll go and face our enemies. Uncle Mel expects to hear about your appointment, in a day or two, and----"
"Oh, Rose!" Evan burst out.
"What is it?"
"Why must I owe everything to you?"
"Why, dear? Why, because, if you do, it"s very much better than your owing it to anybody else. Proud again?"
Not proud: only second fiddle.
"You know, dear Evan, when two people love, there is no such thing as owing between them."
"Rose, I have been thinking. It is not too late. I love you, G.o.d knows!
I did in Portugal: I do now--more and more. But Oh, my bright angel!" he ended the sentence in his breast.
"Well? but--what?"
Evan sounded down the meaning of his "but." Stripped of the usual heroics, it was, "what will be thought of me?" not a small matter to any of us. He caught a distant glimpse of the little bit of bare selfishness, and shrank from it.
"Too late," cried Rose. "The battle has commenced now, and, Mr.
Harrington, I will lean on your arm, and be led to my dear friends yonder. Do they think that I am going to put on a mask to please them?
Not for anybody! What they are to know they may as well know at once."
She looked in Evan"s face.
"Do you hesitate?"
He felt the contrast between his own and hers; between the n.i.g.g.ard spirit of the beggarly receiver, and the high bloom of the exalted giver. Nevertheless, he loved her too well not to share much of her nature, and wedding it suddenly, he said:
"Rose; tell me, now. If you were to see the place where I was born, could you love me still?"
"Yes, Evan."
"If you were to hear me spoken of with contempt--"
"Who dares?" cried Rose. "Never to me!"
"Contempt of what I spring from, Rose. Names used... Names are used ..."
"Tush!--names!" said Rose, reddening. "How cowardly that is! Have you finished? Oh, faint heart! I suppose I"m not a fair lady, or you wouldn"t have won me. Now, come. Remember, Evan, I conceal nothing; and if anything makes you wretched here, do think how I love you."
In his own firm belief he had said everything to arrest her in her course, and been silenced by transcendent logic. She thought the same.
Rose made up to the conclave under the maple.
The voices hushed as they approached.
"Capital weather," said Rose. "Does Harry come back from London to-morrow--does anybody know?"
"Not aware," Laxley was heard to reply.
"I want to speak a word to you, Rose," said Mrs. Shorne.
"With the greatest pleasure, my dear aunt": and Rose walked after her.
"My dear Rose," Mrs. Shorne commenced, "your conduct requires that I should really talk to you most seriously. You are probably not aware of what you are doing: n.o.body likes ease and natural familiarity more than I do. I am persuaded it is nothing but your innocence. You are young to the world"s ways, and perhaps a little too headstrong, and vain."
"Conceited and wilful," added Rose.
"If you like the words better. But I must say--I do not wish to trouble your father--you know he cannot bear worry--but I must say, that if you do not listen to me, he must be spoken to."
"Why not Mama?"
"I should naturally select my brother first. No doubt you understand me."
"Any distant allusion to Mr. Harrington?"
"Pertness will not avail you, Rose."
"So you want me to do secretly what I am doing openly?"
"You must and shall remember you are a Jocelyn, Rose."
"Only half, my dear aunt!"
"And by birth a lady, Rose."
"And I ought to look under my eyes, and blush, and shrink, whenever I come near a gentleman, aunt!"