Chapter 29 – Every Day the Protagonist Wants to Capture Me
Chapter 29 Getting it on
Chu Yu"s body was still frozen from head to foot and unable to move. In that moment, he cursed the eighteen G.o.ds and Buddhas from the bottom of his heart.
He did not expect Xie Xi to suddenly attack him and take advantage of how he was not guarded against him. Now the inhibiting earth qi had sealed up his spirit veins so that he couldn"t move, let alone form hand seals.
Xie Xi, who had a look that was like a smile and yet not, took off his bloodied robe and flung it towards the bed, saying: "I took one off, shouldn"t my brother also take one off?"
Pardon me, but no.
Chu Yu’s mouth twitched: "Xie Xi, calm down."
Xie Xi paused then said: "s.h.i.+xiong, let me tell you, I am quite calm."
Chu Yu had a strange feeling that something was out of place and frowned. "… Didn’t you just call me by my name? Why did you suddenly return to calling me s.h.i.+xiong?"
Xie Xi leisurely pulled open Chu Yu"s collar and said lightly: "I was worried that s.h.i.+xiong might still be angry at me and I didn’t want to offend. I was also a little angry so I didn"t want to call you s.h.i.+xiong. But since s.h.i.+xiong doesn"t blame me, then I"m also not angry anymore. Naturally, I must respect my s.h.i.+xiong and call him politely again."
By this point Chu Yu’s robe had been taken off. Xie Xi lowered his head then suddenly started gently licking Chu Yu"s neck. He then opened his mouth and started biting at his Adam’s apple.
Having sensitive place was played with in such a way made Chu Yu"s face turn faintly red. His breathing quickened slightly but the next moment the expression on his face turned angry: "Is this what you call respect?"
Xie Xi raised his eyebrows and easily pulled apart Chu Yu"s legs, placing his knees in between while holding his hips, like he did once before when they were trapped in the illusion. With wicked intentions, Xie Xi started rubbing the place between Chu Yu"s legs.
Chu Yu held back the impulse to curse and took a deep breath: "Xie Xi, don’t force me."
Xie Xi"s expression was calm: "s.h.i.+xiong deceived me once. I also used deception. s.h.i.+xiong forced me to go back. I also forced him to go back. Isn"t that right? I like s.h.i.+xiong so I will not bicker about these things. s.h.i.+xiong was always evasive and talked ambiguously. Instead of losing you so in such a foolish way, I would be better off being more aggressive. s.h.i.+xiong, isn"t that right?"
After saying that, Xie Xi casually took off his inner robe, revealing a strong chest that was mostly healed but was still stained with blood. Some of the a.s.sorted wounds hadn"t closed and were still bleeding, making Chu Yu feel horrified.
Chu Yu closed his eyes. Suddenly there was a notification sound in his head.
The System that had been completely silent for a long time in accordance to his demand now said: "Because the host always turns off the comment barrage view ~ the number of barrage comments had exceeded the limit ~ in three seconds ~ the comment barrage will automatically pop up ~ three ~ two ~ one ~"
Chu Yu was seized with terror: "****! Not now!"
Then his eyes were flooded by comments.
[UserBuErChen: ****, the little s.h.i.+di"s anger is off the charts! ▼w▼ After ten years, old enough to eat! +2 Points]
[UserTootToot: Swiping my card on the bus! Muah! Muah! (kissing sound) +2 Points]
[UserNine: Ah, I dropped my student card. +2 Points]
[UserSorryForBeingOP : I dropped my driver"s card. +2 Points]
[UserAutumnFlowersFall: Little gong, top him! Do it! Get it on with Da s.h.i.+xiong! Do Da s.h.i.+xiong until he can"t get out of bed for three days! +2 Points]
[UserDazedandConfused: **** you! I remember this was on the front page. I bookmarked it a long time ago then today I see it changed channel! ****! This turned gay! My eyes! -2 Points]
[UserBuErChen: Whoa, a straight guy appeared! 0 Points]
(TN: On the internet the admins or creators are jokingly called "bus drivers." People who want something, like access to a group or more content, sometimes call themselves "pa.s.sengers." Hence, "swipe the card" is posting a comment to "pay" for content/access. Dropping the student card, etc. are jokes. Basically, they are leaving comments and also asking for more content. Thirsty fujos.h.i.+ asking for s.m.u.t?)
You ****er!
System, you did this on purpose!
Chu Yu almost couldn"t stop himself from coughing up a mouthful of blood. Blinking, he tried hard to disregard the frenzied barrage of comments. He squinted and tried to see Xie Xi"s expression more clearly. Chu Yu couldn"t see if he was happy or angry but Xie"s Xi"s voice was soft as he whispered in Chu Yu"s ear: "It seems that my efforts were insufficient and I must try harder… in spite of everything s.h.i.+xiong didn"t respond at all."
Chu Yu inwardly mocked the comments that artificially overlaid his vision. Then, suddenly, his lips were sucked as Xie Xi kissed him. Xie Xi"s warm breath intimately mingled with Chu Yu"s. Though he couldn"t see Xie Xi"s expression clearly, he felt his emotions through the kiss that was urgent and ruthless. Chu Yu tilted his head to try to avoid the kiss but his chin was firmly held still. Xie Xi pressed deeper, prying mouth open with the tip of his unyielding tongue and entangling Chu Yu"s tongue with his.
Xie Xi"s other hand wandered over his body, caressing here and there, rubbing his lower back. Gradually, it went lower and lower, exploring his body.
Chu Yu almost choked. Dizzy and light-headed, lights swam in front of his eyes.
However, gradually his body felt hotter and hotter and even became aroused.
Chu Yu wanted to cry but there weren"t enough tears: Chu Yu, Chu Yu, you are a straight man. Being push down by a man, not only do you not feel disgusted, you actually …
Xie Xi gently withdrew, chuckled, and said in a low voice: "s.h.i.+xiong, you reacted."
He tenderly pulled out the hairpin out from Chu Yu"s hair. Looking at the hairpin, Xie Xi couldn"t help but lower his head and gently kiss Chu Yu on the lips again with his eyes glistening. He shook his head and said: "I thought s.h.i.+xiong hated me and hated the hairpin that I gave him. I believe that it was thrown away … but just now I saw the sword ta.s.sel on Xun Sheng. In fact, s.h.i.+xiong doesn"t hate me, right?"
"…"
Chu Yu resigned himself to his fate in despair. His face was still expressionless but he couldn"t help panting. His chest heaved up and down violently.
Xie Xi propped himself up and looked down at Chu Yu on the bed. He smiled while lifting his hand and then he gently pulled down Chu Yu"s robe till it was halfway down his chest. Xie Xi"s ice-cold fingers that were still stained with blood caressed the cool, smooth, and delicate skin.
Catching sight of the blood on his hands, Xie Xi suddenly blinked and stared at them blankly in a daze, as if he had remembered something. He slowly withdrew his hand and bent down until one side of his face was on Chu Yu"s bare chest. Tightly cradling Chu Yu"s body in his arms, Xie Xi lay on top of him as if he was going to sleep.
Chu Yu originally had burned with anger but when he saw this action, his heart"s anger abated, though he still felt rather nervous.
Oh no, how could it be? Is it because he is the protagonist, so that no matter what he does, Chu Yu can"t genuinely be angry with him?
Xie Xi"s head rested on Chu Yu"s chest as he listened to the sound of Chu Yu’s heartbeat. His eyes stared blankly as if in a trance and turned red as they filled with tears: "s.h.i.+xiong… at that time I was really afraid. These thousands of days and nights I regretted it so much that I wanted to die! If I hadn"t left, it’s likely that you wouldn"t have found yourself in danger. Fortunately, you came back this time. Otherwise, if the Mausoleum Ruins opened and you didn’t return, I don’t know what … what I would have done …"
Chu Yu"s lips had been kissed until they were numb. He was silent for a moment then whispered: "I don"t blame you."
"I killed a lot of Demonic Path cultivators…" Xie Xi closed his eyes and murmured: "s.h.i.+xiong, I thought that if I killed a them all, maybe you would return."
His body"s paralysis gradually disappeared. With great effort Chu Yu stretched out his hands and stroked Xie Xi’s hair.
"s.h.i.+xiong, you promised me you would never leave me. You broke your word. I dare not believe in you again…"
For thousands of days and nights, Xie Xi had suffered. The only thing that could give him a little comfort was the sachet that Chu Yu gave him.
Xie Xi’s breathing gradually slowed and evened out. His still kept mumbling: "s.h.i.+xiong, come back…"
… He fell asleep?!
Chu Yu looked at the barrage of comments and, sure enough, the readers were complaining: "I"ve taken my pants off and this is what you show me?!"1 Raising his eyebrows, joyful at other people"s disappointment, Chu Yu saw that the "comment view off" b.u.t.ton had reappeared. He quickly turned off the comment view.
Looking down at Xie Xi, who was sleeping peacefully on his chest, Chu Yu didn"t know whether he should laugh or cry. Then he felt a bit frustrated.
Why should this child give up the all of the beautiful flowers in the harem for a chrysanthemum?
The simple-minded Chu Yu couldn"t think about this anymore. After a while, he turned and pushed Xie Xi onto the side of the bed. Although Xie Xi was asleep, his hands were still gripping Chu Yu"s robe. Chu Yu therefore had no choice but to kneel beside Xie Xi"s body and reach out a hand to take off his inner robe.
Suddenly the door was kicked open, "Little brother! You’re back…"
The shout ended abruptly. The last word trailed off: "…"
Chu Yu: "…"
Chu Yu didn"t dare to turn around to look.
There seemed to be scorching hot eyes behind him, staring at him, almost burning him. Chu Yu"s inner robe was halfway down his waist and his bare back was the target of a terrible gaze. To take it off or not to take it off? An entire zoo seemed to be roaring in his head.2
Entangled in his thoughts for some time, Chu Yu then boldly took off his inner robe. Immediately after, he heard a gasp from behind.
Smoothly picking up the robe that Xie Xi had tossed aside, Chu Yu dryly coughed and turned back: "It’s not what you think…"
A half-naked person was lying on the bed, pale and tender. Chu Yu"s face was stiff but his cheeks were rosy. It looked like he was on the verge of removing his clothes. What else would people think?
In his hearts, tears were streaming down his cheeks: Really, he was the one who was forced…
The people who were at the door inhaled a cold breath of air. Their eyes wandered up and down, gazing at this extremely strange sight.
Chu Yu had a bad feeling about this. He wanted to open his mouth but it was as though he was lying on his deathbed in his final throes and that he had to accept the situation and move on. Then Third s.h.i.+di suddenly reacted. He bounced to the door and hurriedly closed it behind them.
Chu Yu had almost brought the right words up to his lips but they were frightened away by the banging of the door. Chu Yu stood still for a moment then grabbed his interspatial storage ring and took out the bronze mirror that he had picked up in the Mausoleum Ruins. The smooth and glossy, polished mirror shone in the clear light and reflected Chu Yu"s image clearly.
His hairpin had been pulled off and his black hair was flowing down to his shoulders. His eyes were bright red and glistening with tears. His lips were swollen and as red as though he had smeared them with rouge. Looking down, he saw that there were distinct, deep hickeys on his neck.
In short, his face was full of unsatisfied desire
Chu Yu almost dropped the mirror.
There"s something wrong with this image!!! He had been done in by the protagonist!!!
Chu Yu simply wanted to shrink away and hide inside the room. Looking back at the sleeping Xie Xi, Chu Yu"s eyebrows twitched but he patiently endured and put a quilt up on Xie Xi. Chu Yu put then on a new robe, and after hesitating for a moment, pushed the door open and went out.
At this time, the bright moon had risen. Magnificently parading across for thousands of turns, tonight it looked sombre and cheerless. At the stone table in the courtyard, Chu Sheng, Lu Qingan, and Third s.h.i.+di were seated in a row. The atmosphere was frosty yet at the same time it was right on the verge of exploding.
Well, the princess was not here. If she were there, the jury bringing him to trial would be even stronger.
= □ = … I really want to go back to the room to shake the protagonist.
What"s with this "caught in the act" event? Why does he feel like a molester on trial? What happened to the novel"s original plot?
Chu Yu swallowed. He barely managed to keep his usual cold, elegant, n.o.ble expression on his face. Trembling with fear, he put his hands behind his back and walked up beside Chu Sheng. He said: "… Big brother."
The brocon"s face revealed an expression as though there was a void in his heart. He seemed to be beside himself with panic. Ah, brocon, please try to control yourself…
Chu Sheng heard Chu Yu’s voice and regained control of his senses. However, the previous scene was still too shocking. It was as shocking as learning that Chu Yu had returned. He was a little more angry than surprised.
… A little?
Naturally, that would be impossible.
Chu Sheng flew into a rage: "Little brother! What’s going on! Does that kid force you to do anything?! Did he… get away with it?"
What shouldn"t be touched had been touched. This one"s own flesh and blood that should not have been kissed was kissed. They had slept together in the same bed for many years. They had even got married inside the illusion. Nonetheless, he was able to get away with his poor chrysanthemum still intact.
Chu Yu didn"t dare to speak when he saw the expression on Chu Sheng"s face that showed that this brocon was on the verge of collapse.
Third s.h.i.+di trembled on the side and couldn"t help but say weakly: "Lord Chu, that time, what we saw was… Da s.h.i.+xiong seemed to be on top …"
Chu Sheng threw a cold glance at him, sharp as a knife: "Shut up."
Third s.h.i.+di trembled and shut up.
Chu Sheng wiped tears from the corners of his eyes. His pained expression seemed to say: My family"s Yu-er was eaten by cats.3 My family"s cabbage was gnawed on by dogs. My younger brother was taken away by an ill-intentioned person.
Chu Yu couldn’t bear to look at him, but he couldn’t help but look at Lu Qingan, whose expression was the calmest: "s.h.i.+zun, I…"
Lu Qingan pressed his hand and said profoundly, "I know all about it."
Chu Yu almost sobbed. But he wasn"t happy for long because Lu Qingan shook his head and said lightly: "Xi-er has been injured so don"t be so impatient next time."
Aaaahhhhh!!!
s.h.i.+zun! Big brother! Third s.h.i.+di! Listen to me!
Translator’s Note:
I already took off my pants and this is what you show me??! – I rather like this Chinese idiom that is a colorful way of saying “I was expecting some spicy hot content but I got nothing!”As usual, please let me know if there are any errors and please leave a comment if you can. This is one of the funniest chapters in the story, IMO. I’d love to know what everyone thought of it.Poor Xie Xi! Imagine waiting ten years not knowing if you Da s.h.i.+xiong is dead or alive…Chrysanthemum still intact.Thanks for reading this.P.S. If you donated at you should have early access up to chapter 31 (first drafts only).