"This won"t do," Ruth said briskly, forcing herself to sit up a little straighten "Now, Dean, if you"ll carve that bird, we"ll have a hot meal."
"Yes, ma"am."
Bowls were pa.s.sed, and all worked to stem their emotions. When Lorri had her first bite, she laughed softly.
"I think the men aboard theEvery Stormwould envy me now."
"What"s theEvery Storm?"Max asked before she thought, but Lorri didn"t seem to mind.
"The PT boat that rescued me."
I Max"s eyes got huge, but she stopped herself from any more,i questions. Lorri didn"t seem to notice.
"fThis is delicious, Mother," Lorri said.
"Thank you, dear."
"What, Max," Lorri asked between bites, "no other questions?"
"Well," she answered, her voice quiet with distress, "I didn"t [Want to ask anything I shouldn"t."
Si Lorri put her fork down and looked at her family. They looked : at her, knowing they were all treading on new ground.
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Lori Wick I.
"Have you all decided that I can"t be questioned?" Lorri asked quietly.
"We didn"t want to be insensitive," Ruth answered, and Lorri nodded.
"I do appreciate that, but you can ask me if you want to know something."
"All right," Ruth said.
The four went back to their meal, and surprisingly, Dean was the one to break the silence.
"Why don"t you tell Max about the head on the PT boat?"
Lorri smiled. "You"ve never seen anything so small, Max. It made the powder room look like a dance hall."
"And was there only one?"
"No, there was also one for the crew."
"Where did you sleep?"
"In the officer"s quarters."
"Where did they sleep-the officers?"
"Well, Lieutenant Riggs slept in there too, but Ensign West-land moved in with the crew. At least I think that"s how it was. I was a little dazed during that time."
"You slept in with the lieutenant?" Max asked, her voice speaking volumes.
"He hung a blanket," Dean told her, his voice dry.
"Did he tell you about that?" Lorri asked Dean, surprise in her voice.
"Yes." His voice was still dry.
Ruth was quiet during all of this, certain that the details would be emerging over quite some time and trying not to think about having to tell Max the hard part.
Lorri spooned cranberry sauce onto her plate.
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"I didn"t think you could even buy cranberry sauce at this time of the year," Dean commented.
"You spend so much time in the grocery store," Ruth teased him gently, smiling when he laughed.
No more questions came up at the table. Lorri couldn"t eat all she"d put on her plate but didn"t worry. As she helped with the dishes, she was already planning on a turkey sandwich before bed. And maybe a little more cranberry sauce.
Ruth heard the soft knock on her door not long after she"d H climbed into bed. She was still sitting against the headboard with her diary and told whoever it was to come in.
"Mother," Max whispered as she peeked inside. v. "Come in, Max"
Max slipped inside and sat on the edge of the bed. She looked at her mother, not wanting to do anything to make her cry but $o desperate for answers that she couldn"t sleep.
"Did Grandpa talk to you? Did he tell you what happened while J) Raine was asleep?" "Yes."
"Can you tell me?"
"Yes, and it was not my plan to keep it from you, but I didn"t Jiknow how. to go about it when Lorri was still awake." Max nodded and waited.
"I"m going to keep it brief, Max, for both our sakes," Ruth began, i"ltears already filling her eyes. "There was a storm, and the small i;p/lane they were in crashed on an island, not in the ocean like we "talked about. Clarence Fuller and Josie were killed immediately.
i 102.
Lorri was on the island alone for six weeks before a PT boat stopped I"llfor repairs and found her." A shudder ran over Ruth"s frame, but IIshe made herself continue. "They took her to the base at Seaford, IIand your grandpa was there. From there it took some time to arrange pa.s.sage home."
Max was silent. She had pictured the ocean and not realized the part about an island, but it made such sense: "So Josie, I mean, her body, will just stay on the island?"
Ruth nodded, not able to speak. I"What island was it?"
"I"m not sure it even has a name."
Max looked confused, and Ruth waited.
"So did Lorri have to bury Josie and the pilot?"
Ruth could only nod.
I"llThe younger woman"s face crumpled with grief and tears, and Ruth reached for her daughter. Max sobbed against her mother"s nightgown, certain that she had never known such pain. IFor long minutes they clung to each other, trying to weather this new blast of grief and live to tell about it. Imagining all that Lorri had been through was dreadful, but the sudden thought of asking details of her was so abhorrent that neither one could even conceive of that.
"Here," Ruth handed Max a tissue, "blow your nose."
Max sat up, eyes red and puffy, and used the tissue. She took some long, shuddering breaths and realized her headache was back.
"I couldn"t sleep," Max admitted. "I wanted to know, and I couldn"t stop thinking about it."
"I know, honey. It"s awful, and that"s why I didn"t want us to press Lorri to tell us."
"Does she know that we know?"
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"I"m not sure she"s thought about it one way or the other. As you can tell, she"s still not herself." Max nodded.
"Your grandfather told me that she"s more filled out now than when he first saw her."
"She had a sandwich before she went to bed," Max reminded her mother, trying to be hopeful.
Ruth nodded. "She"s home now. And we"ll take care of her, and she"ll be pur old Lorri again."
"The only thing missing is Jo."
Ruth internally Qinched at those words, but Max had always been open and honest with her feelings, and she never wanted her to be something she wasn"t.
(l"Oh, Mother!" Max suddenly grabbed her hand. "Who"s going to tell Ken?"
"Your grandfather."
, Not believing it possible to have more tears, Max cried again.
, She didn"t stay long in her mother"s room as her headache became worse and she longed for her bed, but every time she thought about her sister"s fiance", fresh tears threatened. Finally heading I to her room, she climbed into bed and fell asleep with Ken ^Showers" face in her mind.
104I.
TliHZ Dean knew somepne was up and about Buddy"s collar jingled [i"as his head came off the floor, and Dean heard footsteps in the I hall. He waited for water to run in the bathroom but heard nothi Jing as he slipped from the bed and into his robe and slippers.
. IOnce in the upstairs hallway, a glow from the downstairs told Ihim he"d been right. He headed that way, not bothering to be 1 joverly quiet so he wouldn"t startle whoever was downstairs, j J It was Ruth. She sat in the living room, curled onto a corner Jof the sofa, her head buried in her arms. The light on the table burned next to her, but the rest of the room was in darkness. Dean took the other end of the sofa and quietly waited. It didn"t take long.
"I can"t stand it, Dean." Her voice was thick with emotion. "My baby"s last memory of her sister is having to bury her. I can"t stand it."
Dean was silent as she cried. He had already been forced to digest this fact, but it wasn"t much easier for him to accept.
"Not only is Josie gone, but Lorri had to bury her. The thought of it pains me until I don"t think I can breathe."
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She had looked up at him, and Dean just let her talk. "You buried a son and a spouse, Dean. And now I"ve done both. I grieved for Tom-you know how much I miss him-but losing Josie is different."
"It is different." Dean"s voice was low and sad. "Losing my Maxine was unbelievably painful, but losing Tom was like losing a part of myself. I don"t know if there"s any other way to describe it."
"I think you must be right. A corner of my heart is constantly on Josie, but now that I have details, Lorri"s in that painful corner as well. When I picture her digging in the dirt..."
She couldn"t go on, and Dean wasn"t sure that she should. For some time neither one spoke. Ruth would cry and then containtherself. Dean sat in his quiet agony. Eventually he began to pray. "Dear Father, I thank you for bringing Lorri back to us. Thank,JYou that she"s home safe. Help us to endure this pain, Lord. Jo is ith You, and that should bring us great joy, but right now we Blare lodged in our pain. Please don"t let us lose sight of You and pour plans for each of us. Please help us. For Your sake and in Pour Son"s name, amen."
"Thank you, Dean," Ruth whispered. "It will come, Ruth. I promise you. Your grief will turn a corner, id the intensity will pa.s.s. G.o.d understands all about losing a Id. Just keep going back to Him."
Ruth could only nod because the tears were starting again, in came close and gave her a hug before leaving her on her . He knew there was little he could do. To some extent, all of em would have to walk this path with G.o.d alone.
106.
Lori Wick "She sleeps a lot," Max said to her mother at lunchtime the next day.
"Yes, she does."
"Is she really all right?"
"Yes, she was checked by a doctor at the base in Australia. There"s also a huge time change to deal with, and it"s simply going to take some time to get back to normal."
Max wanted to ask how much time but knew that was being unreasonable. She knew it would never be quite the same again. The thought saddened her, so she tried to think about something else.
"Summer"s going by fast," she said.
"Yes, it is."
"I"m not going to want to go back to school."