I continued to stare, and as I did the handbag I"d placed on the table by my orb after I"d arrived and before I"d joined Valentine jumped in its place.
This meant I jumped in my seat and stared at that.
My handbag skipped again and I heard a distinct buzz that I knew came from my phone.
I released a relieved breath as I understood what was happening and reached for it, for I was simply getting a text.
I pulled the phone out of my bag and activated it.
However, there were no notifications of a text.
My eyes slid to my crystal ball and a frisson of awareness slinked up my spine.
My ball was telling me something.
My magic was telling me something.
And what I knew was my magic was my magic.
Good magic.
So wherever that magic led me to, in my bones, I felt it safe to follow.
I touched the phone b.u.t.ton, went to my keypad and entered the digits from my crystal ball into it.
Sitting straight in my chair, I lifted the phone to my ear and listened to it ring.
Shortly into this, a man"s voice boomed, "You got Lud."
Lud?
Who was Lud?
"Yo? h.e.l.lo?" the voice called.
Lud.
Oh no.
Lud!
As in...Ludlum.
The digits were for Noc"s father"s phone.
b.a.l.l.s!
"One more time, someone there?" he asked.
"h.e.l.lo, Mr. Hawthorne?" I said it as a question even if I knew the answer.
"Right, darlin", no offense, your job ain"t fun, but I"m not a big fan of marketing calls so do me a favor and take me off your call list."
"Mr. Hawthorne," I stated but couldn"t, for the life of me, decide what to say next.
"Will you do that for me?" he asked.
"This is Franka," I declared.
He said nothing and I thought he"d disengaged.
"Mr. Hawthorne?"
"Franka?"
I nodded swiftly even if he couldn"t see me. "Yes, Franka. Franka Drakkar. Er, Frannie. I"m Noc"s...I"m, erm, Noc"s...well, I"m just Noc"s," I introduced stupidly.
G.o.ds!
"Interesting way to put it," he muttered, sounding amused and then suddenly he did not sound anything of the sort when he asked, "Is my boy okay?"
"Yes, yes, he"s fine. Absolutely. I mean, yes. He is. In most senses. Very fine. I mean to say that.... Actually, what I mean is, he"s quite well. But he"s also..."
Drat!
Why didn"t I disconnect the moment I knew who it was?
There was nothing for it, I hadn"t, so I had to go on.
"He"s also, well...not."
"d.a.m.n," he muttered, seemingly knowing precisely what I was saying. "Uh, sorry, honey. I mean, darn."
"Cursing does not offend me," I shared.
He was back to muttering. "Knowin" my boy, that"s probably good."
He was right about that.
Abruptly, I got cold feet (not that they"d ever been warm).
d.a.m.n my crystal ball.
"I need to apologize. I"m rethinking the wisdom of calling you," I told him even though I hadn"t actually called him knowing I was doing any such thing.
"No, I"m thinkin" it"s probably very wise you called me."
I didn"t know what to say so I didn"t say anything.
"Let me guess, he"s not in a very good mood these days," he said.
"Well, I think that I"m...what I mean to say is, your guess would be correct but I do believe that it"s me who"s putting him in that mood."
"Frannie, honey, it is one hundred percent not you."
Again, I had no idea what to say so I remained silent.
"He gets this way on the anniversary," Mr. Hawthorne relayed.
The anniversary?
"The anniversary of what?" I queried.
"Judy pa.s.sing."
Even sitting, I had to brace my hand to the tabletop to steady myself.
Judy. His stepmother. The only mother he"d known.
The mother he"d been forced to watch die.
"We had a thing," he went on. "The boys were young when it happened and it was me who made the decision, and Noc didn"t agree with it so we had a go "round about it. He shared how he felt and he was clear on that, even then. This being she didn"t wanna be buried but I wanted somewhere to go where I could be with her. Where the boys could be with her. So I buried her. And every year, day she died, I get my boys together and we go there to be with her. Take some lawn chairs and lay "em out. Bring her flowers. Sit with her. Throw back some bourbon. Talk about her. Have her with us for a while."
I thought this lovely and horrible, in equal measures.
Noc"s father kept speaking.
"Noc wasn"t a big fan I went against Judy"s wishes and didn"t cremate her. And he"s also not a big fan of going to see her. Know it. Maybe should let it go. But it"s the only time I got with my family back together, all of us, and it may be me bein" selfish but I don"t care how old he is. I"m still his dad. And she"s the only mom he had. So I feel he should give me that. Me and Judy. He should give us both that."
It took a moment for me to do it and my voice was not my own when I replied, "I cannot say you"re wrong about that, Mr. Hawthorne."
"Lud, Frannie. Please call me Lud."
"Lud," I whispered.
"Knew he wasn"t gonna be able to come this year, made him promise to do somethin" to remember her there. Reckon she"s with all of us all the time, the only way she can be. So told him I want him to find a pretty, peaceful spot, just be quiet and let her be with him. He said he"d do it. Maybe he"s just humoring his old man but gotta say, as much as I know he doesn"t like it, still hope he does it. And because I"m stubborn and love my boy and my wife, the first one I still got, thank the Lord, the last one we lost and it broke us in a way it took a lot of fixin" and we still ain"t right, I want him here next year. Want him to bring you. Want Judy to meet you."
Want Judy to meet you.
I"d never felt more honored.
"I think...I think, sir, she already knows me quite well," I shared carefully.
And hopefully.
Further hoping she liked what she knew.
"I think you are not wrong. Looked after Noc while she was breathin" in a way there"s no way she"d quit even after she"d stopped. He found you, she"d definitely start lookin" after you."
I said nothing, lost in the glory of knowing after his mother died giving Noc to this world, to me, he had another who looked after him at the same time feeling the loss he"d endured when she went away.
"You there, Frannie?"
"I just...need a moment," I murmured stiltedly.
He gave me that moment but in his, he said softly, "d.a.m.ned you do."
"Sorry?"
I heard him clear his throat before he replied, "You do. Heard it in Noc when he talked about you. Now I hear it in you. What I hear pleases me, Frannie, reckon you know that, just reckon you don"t know how much. And it makes me look forward even more to meeting you."
I knew what he was saying and I was beside myself with happiness he understood my feelings for his son.
But even if I had more information about what was happening, I didn"t comprehend the fullness of it.
Before I could broach that, Ludlum Hawthorne declared, "Obvious this is worryin" you and thank you for givin" that to my boy. And thank you again for doin" the right thing and callin" his old man to have a chat about it. But I got it from here."
Oh no.
I knew what "I got it" means and I didn"t have a good feeling about Noc"s father having anything if it had a thing to do with all this.
"Um...Lud-"
"We"ll hash it out and get ourselves sorted. Don"t you worry," he a.s.sured without a.s.suring me in the slightest. "No doubt you know we got a lotta love in our family but that doesn"t mean, four men, all of us pigheaded, we don"t clash. We do. First time you see it, I can understand it"ll worry you. But you"ll also see we get over it. We learned over and over again, doin" that the hard way, to hang on to what we got. And just so you know, anniversary pa.s.ses, he comes back to himself. My advice next time, just wait it out. He"ll be good as new in no time."
"Can I just say, Lud, that-"
He cut me off like he didn"t hear me speak.
"Now I gotta go. Bad timing, Sue"s dragging me out to lunch with her bridge cronies. Twice a year I gotta go to this lunch and if they didn"t raise buckets of money for cancer research, I"d be on my boat with a rod in my hand. But I"ll say, regardless of the subject matter, sure was good to talk to you. Next time we do it, I"ll make you giggle. I"m a comedian. A good one. And don"t listen to Noc or Dash or Orly when they say my material stinks. They don"t know what they"re talking about. I"m d.a.m.ned funny."
"I"m sure you are," I replied swiftly but didn"t get the rest out swiftly enough as he spoke again.
"Now you take care of yourself, honey, and would say take care of my boy but seems to me you got that down."
He was so very wrong.
He was also so very much not done.
"And maybe Sue and me"ll get on a plane so I can give you a hug in person and she can size you up for whatever outfits she"s gonna buy you come Christmas. If they"re not your thing, just give "em to charity but don"t say anything to her. Only way I"ll say it"s fortunate you live across the country, you won"t have to dress up in the stuff she buys and she won"t see you not doin" it. She gave the boys all Christmas sweaters three years ago and pouts that they refuse to wear "em. Won"t listen to a word I say on the subject that those sweaters are b.u.t.t-ugly and laughable besides. Noc"s has got a reindeer st.i.tched on it with a bell for a nose, for chrissakes. I mean, who in their right mind thinks a man is gonna wear a Christmas sweater with a reindeer on it with a bell for a nose? Love her to bits, she"s a d.a.m.n fine woman, but that don"t mean she don"t got some crazy ideas."
I had no earthly idea what he was talking about.
I also had no intention of asking. My anxiety was building and I needed to stop him from "hashing" anything out with Noc, and I needed to do that now.
To my grave misfortune, I didn"t get the chance to get into it for I heard him shout, not at me, "I"m ready, sweetheart, just on the phone with Noc"s Frannie!"
G.o.ds.