Mason.
My eyes burn with unshed tears as I watch him devour me. Slow and deliberate swirls of his tongue and strong lips pull against my overheated flesh.
I should"ve known this would happen: that giving him this part of me would only open me up to falling even deeper in love with him.
I gasp as he buries his fingers inside me, growling against me in a way that vibrates my most sensitive parts. My fingers dig into the bed, searching for something to hold onto so this o.r.g.a.s.m doesn"t launch me through the air. As hard as I try to stay grounded, the wave hits with a force that sends my head to the pillow and my back bowing. Stars explode in my vision as he continues to feed and not let up even after my pulsing o.r.g.a.s.m fades.
It"s too much and not enough. I pull against his hair, rolling my hips in an attempt to get free or maybe get more. My head scrambles until it feels like it might combust.
"Mason."
Drunk with need, I roll my hips. He climbs up my body, placing his very naked and aroused self between my legs.
"Good morning."
""Morning." I suck in a long breath as he enters me slowly until he"s firmly seated inside me.
He offers his lips to me, and I greedily kiss him, tasting myself on his mouth. It doesn"t seem like much, but it"s as if the gesture is meant to remind me whom I belong to. "I think I like waking you up."
I nip at his bottom lip. "I think I like you waking me up."
He pulls almost all the way out, before moving back in, each time circling his hips to rub against me. I"m already so close and we"ve barely begun. Again, he continues in torturously slow glides back and forth, around and back, until I"m moving beneath him to go faster.
"Last night, I was too rough with you." His eyes never leave mine, and I don"t miss the flicker of pain that pa.s.ses behind them.
"No, you weren"t. I want you to do it again." My cheeks heat at my honesty. The truth is I loved his anger. It felt similar to my own, something I could relate to.
"There"ll be times for that"-he traces the line of my jaw to my lips with his own-"but now I want to make love to you."
"I"ve never been made love to before."
Don"t cry, don"t cry.
The corner of his mouth lifts, but only slightly. "You have, we just didn"t have a name for it then."
I don"t know who kissed whom first, but our mouths came together in perfect time as he loved me with his body. He took his time, making sure to hit every single spot that sent sparks across my skin. Just like the roll of the waves while sitting on the long board, he works himself over me in a steady but constant rhythm. Not s.e.x or f.u.c.king, but a combining of souls for the singular purpose of communicating a tender adoration. Unconditional love.
A forever kind of love.
His jaw hardens, and his neck tenses as we slowly crawl towards release, together. Neither of us in a rush, we climb gradually, every deliberate stroke a step closer to what"s sure to be an earth-shattering o.r.g.a.s.m. Tenderness shines through his eyes as he watches me, and my throat swells as I fight back the tears.
It doesn"t take a mind reader to know his thoughts are on us, on all that"s going to happen once we leave the safety of this bed. The protection of this moment. With a force unequal to any I"ve felt before, my body detonates. My nails bite into his biceps as I soundlessly cry out his name. My head swirls in a fog, and I grip him tighter through the aftershocks that wrack my limbs. He growls into my neck, his strokes still constant and controlled, but the sting of his teeth and heat that pours from his body, signal his release. He drops on top of me, not bothering to hold himself up and shield me from his weight.
I"m breathless, pressed deep into the mattress while he"s buried inside me, and I"ve never felt safer or more taken care of, more connected to another human being.
He rolls off me, and I"m instantly slapped in the face with the loss of his presence and the harsh reality of what"s to come.
This is good-bye. For now.
Fear grips me from within, and my muscles shake uncontrollably.
"Come here, baby. It"s okay." He pulls me close, rolling to his side so that we"re face-to-face. His glare burns into mine. "One day at a time. One minute at a time if you have to." He pulls my hands to his chest, holding them to his pounding heart. "No decision is permanent, except this one."
I nod and focus on how clear and determined he looks now. Nothing like the man I saw last night who was filled with doubt and anger.
"Whatever happens, you keep in contact with me at all times, understand? If I don"t hear from you, I"m going after you."
"But-"
He shakes his head. "Nope. No buts. You"re not in this alone. Not anymore."
Warmth overtakes me and I suck in a deep breath. All I"ve ever been in this is alone. But not now.
"Stay public. As much as you can, try to stay public. If you"re forced to be alone with him, always have your phone."
I nod. "Okay."
He nods too. "Good." His eyes slam shut, and he brings my bunched hands to his mouth, kisses my knuckles then drops them back to press against his chest. When he opens his eyes, I cringe against the worry and pain reflected in them. "And please, if you can get out of, you know, if you can avoid-f.u.c.k!" He groans and shakes his head.
s.e.x. I get it.
I won"t make him say it. "I will. I promise. Headache, period, whatever I have to do to get out of it, I promise I will."
He shakes his head, mouth twisted in a disgusted frown.
"Mason." I rest my forehead against his. "G.o.d, I"m going to hate every second of this. Being away from you will kill me. I"ll do this quickly. Knowing that Lana"s vindication and you, the two most important things to me in this entire world, are waiting for me on the other end, I"ll make the most of every second and see this through. I promise."
He rolls his head back and forth against mine, growling. "I can"t f.u.c.king believe I"m letting this happen."
"I can."
He blinks open his eyes.
"You have a good heart, Mase."
"f.u.c.k, don"t say that. I"m allowing the woman I love to be in the arms of some sick f.u.c.k. I deserve to be castrated for that!"
"Stop it. No more looking back. It"s only forward for us. Forward and forever." I grip his face, forcing him to look at me. "Promise me we"re never saying good-bye."
I nods. "I promise."
"Say it." I need to hear it.
"I"ll never say good-bye."
"And neither will I. Never. No good-byes. Forward and forever."
A weak smile touches his lips. "The two effs."
"Well, for us there will be three." I wink with the hope of lightening his mood.
"You have a dirty mind, Miss Trixy." He pulls at my lower lip with his thumb, and I suck it deep into my mouth, eliciting a growl from his chest.
"We have a few more hours before I need to head home. I"ll show you how dirty my mind is."
His expression sobers, and he places a small kiss on my lips. "Promise me you"ll stay safe."
"For you? Always."
Twenty-nine.
Mason Three days feels like three months.
So far, Trix is no closer to finding her sister"s killer. She"s kept me informed through short phone calls and texts, even managed to come over for a few hours before she went to work yesterday, and for that I"m grateful. This guy she calls Hatchet has been MIA since the night Trix showed up drunk on my doorstep.
Although it would break her heart, I"m praying the f.u.c.ker never shows his face again.
I flex my sore fists, reveling in the ache of my joints as I gear up for a session with the heavy bags. There"s something to be said for being hate-fueled and resentful. These last few days in the gym have been some of my best. Amazing what happens when I paint a faceless man who"ll have his hands all over my woman on every f.u.c.king thing I punch.
After five minutes of jump rope, I throw my first punch, feeling stronger than I did even yesterday. Blow after blow, I imagine the man who will be seduced into giving up information by my woman.
f.u.c.k, f.u.c.k, f.u.c.k!
NOFX"s "Stickin" in my Eye" bleeds in my ears; the beat pushes me harder as I throw all my weight behind each hit. Sweat blurs my vision, but doesn"t slow my pace. With every strike, I throw up a silent prayer that Trix"s mission goes down in flames and we can return to where we were the night we got came back from San Jose. I throttle the bag with a series of jabs when NOFX fades to the pinging of my ringtone.
I rip my phone from the elastic case at my bicep. Drake"s name flashes on the screen.
Dammit.
I hit "accept," panting into the speaker hanging from my earbuds. "Drake, man . . . what"s up?"
"Whoa . . ." He chuckles. "You f.u.c.kin"?"
I work to catch my breath. "Shut up, a.s.shole."
"Needta" finish up? Call me back?" He laughs. "Hate to be the cause of a nasty case of blue b.a.l.l.s, brother."
Dumba.s.s.
"I"m training." I pull my bandana off my head and wipe my face. "You call for a reason?"
"I did. I"ll be in town this weekend. My dad"s putting us up at Caesars again."
My pulse pounds in my ears and my muscles tense. "Business?"
He"s silent for a few seconds then clears his throat. "Yeah."
I drop my chin and dig my fingers into my eyes. "Drake."
"It"s not what you think."
Like I don"t have enough s.h.i.t to deal with right now, Trix and her renegade mission, and now my hard-headed brother.
"Not bailing you out again. I"m done. This last time could"ve totally f.u.c.ked me."
"I know. I know. Listen. I need you to come by Sat.u.r.day night."
"No. Wait. Scratch that. f.u.c.k no." I pace and run a hand through my sweaty hair.
"It"s not me, man; it"s my dad. He"s asking for you."
"Yeah, well you can tell him to kiss my a.s.s." I"ve been more of a father to D than his biological father ever was. "He thinks he can snap and have me jumping, he"s out of his motherf.u.c.king mind."
Drake blows out a long, frustrated-sounding breath. "Don"t make him come after you, Mase. Puts me in a s.h.i.tty-a.s.s position. Just come by, see what he has to say."
"No, I told you-"
"He knows I want out."
I freeze my pacing and stare blindly at the heavy bag. "You told him you"re done?"
"Yeah. Thing is . . . f.u.c.k . . . Jessica"s pregnant."
I drop to the bench and lean back against the concrete wall. "Oh s.h.i.t."
"Exactly, oh s.h.i.t."
"Are you . . .? I mean, is it-"
"Mine?"
I didn"t want to just come out and ask, but after what I saw last weekend I have to wonder.
"She messes with me, but she"s a good girl. I don"t think she"d f.u.c.k anyone else." He groans. "h.e.l.l, I don"t know what I know. No way I"m asking her now though. She hasn"t stopped crying in days."
"So you"re pulling out of your dad"s s.h.i.t to . . . what?"
"What do you mean to what? Take care of my kid, my woman, what the f.u.c.k you think?" It"s only natural for me to doubt his intentions. The guy f.u.c.ks up things without even trying.
"Good to hear, D. Really. So, this Vegas thing, is it like a one last hurrah and then you"re out?"
"Something like that." He mumbles something I can"t make out. "s.h.i.t. I gotta run. Sat.u.r.day night. I"ll see you there."