Flinx Transcendent

Chapter 7

Flinx was not so straightforward an opponent. Using hands and feet he was able to block thrusting claws before they could cut and tear. Employing his greater height, he was able to fend off his foe"s repeated attempts to fasten strong jaws on arm or leg. He did not strike out himself, made no attempt to cripple or immobilize his enemy. It was Eiipul"s help he sought, not his death. If he could just continue to hold his attacker off, his youth and greater stamina ought to slow the contest to a point where he could simply tackle an exhausted Eiipul and hold his opponent down until he conceded.

Lord Eiipul IX was no fool. He knew when he was being toyed with. Instead of making him think, this only enraged him further. The human, a softskin softskin, was condescending condescending to him! In hand-to-hand combat! It was scarcely to be believed. He redoubled his efforts. But regardless of the attacking combination he employed, each time he struck, the softskin somehow managed to deflect his most forceful effort. Truly, the human was taller, and truly, he had the advantage of youth, but Eiipul felt that his long experience should have more than countered both of these factors. Instead he found every thrust shunted aside, every kick blocked, every bite clamping down only on empty air. His legs were starting to grow heavy-he could not kick as high and as often as in earlier days. His breathing was coming in longer, deeper gasps. And his tail threatened to become an appendage useful for little more than maintaining balance. It was no longer the sound barrier-breaking weapon of yore. to him! In hand-to-hand combat! It was scarcely to be believed. He redoubled his efforts. But regardless of the attacking combination he employed, each time he struck, the softskin somehow managed to deflect his most forceful effort. Truly, the human was taller, and truly, he had the advantage of youth, but Eiipul felt that his long experience should have more than countered both of these factors. Instead he found every thrust shunted aside, every kick blocked, every bite clamping down only on empty air. His legs were starting to grow heavy-he could not kick as high and as often as in earlier days. His breathing was coming in longer, deeper gasps. And his tail threatened to become an appendage useful for little more than maintaining balance. It was no longer the sound barrier-breaking weapon of yore.

In addition to mounting fatigue, he was also beginning to feel the first inklings of fear.

He did not show it, of course. Not only his opponent but his offspring were watching. Why didn"t the softskin strike back? Why didn"t the softskin strike back? Several times Eiipul realized that a failed attack had exposed him to a potentially ruinous riposte by the human. And each time, his surprisingly agile opponent had simply waited for Eiipul to recover and attack again. Several times Eiipul realized that a failed attack had exposed him to a potentially ruinous riposte by the human. And each time, his surprisingly agile opponent had simply waited for Eiipul to recover and attack again.

Even though it was a strategy that had already failed several times, he decided to go low and try to take his taller opponent"s legs out from under him. Once again he feinted with both hands, one after the other, bit down with his jaws, and whirled. His tail whipped around, extending his reach beyond his feet.



Too slow, he realized immediately. Far too slow. The softskin could easily step back out of range. Or worse, leap forward. A move like that would put him on Eiipul"s back.

That was exactly what happened. Dimly, he heard the escalating hisses of dismay from his progeny and their d.a.m.nable friend Kiijeem. Though slim, the human was heavier than Eiipul expected. The alien weight forced him to the floor. He flailed with his tail but struck nothing; the softskin was too high on his back. One fleshy but muscular arm went under Eiipul"s chin, forcing his jaws closed, up, and back. The other limb-long, limber, and deceptively soft-pulled the n.o.ble"s right arm behind his back. Pressure was applied. Despite himself, Eiipul let out a hiss of pain. There was enough weight behind that grip to break the bone.

The human continued to pull-and abruptly rolled over onto his own back. A disoriented Eiipul found himself dragged on top, albeit with his arm still pinned. His tail was free now to strike downward against the human"s legs. Incongruously round pupils peered up into his own.

"I yield, n.o.ble Eiipul! I am defeated. I cast mysself upon your mercy."

What softskin twaddle was this? a bewildered Eiipul found himself wondering. The alien grip on his right arm was still unyielding. The human had been in complete control, in a position to end the fight however he saw fit. Instead, he had chosen to roll over onto his back and surrender. It made no sense, absolutely no sense.

As little sense, in fact, as the softskin"s mad, lunatic tale about an undetectable threat to the entire galaxy and his individual involvement in some fantastic attempt to deal with it.

Voices drew his attention. Unexpectedly released from their anguish by the surprising turn of events, his offspring were shouting wildly at him.

"Throat!" his daughter was screaming. "Tear out hiss throat!"

"Legss!" Eiipul IXb was hissing from the top of his larynx. "Dissembowel before it can risse!" Standing beside him, a thoughtful Kiijeem remained silent. Less personally involved in the preceding combat, only he among the trio of younglings suspected what had actually occurred.

Opening his mouth, Lord Eiipul revealed teeth that were far more sharklike than mammalian. Slowly, he lowered his gaping jaws toward Flinx. Off to the side Pip fluttered uncertainly.

When that compilation of razor-sharp dent.i.tion had dropped very close to the human"s face, Eiipul hissed in an angry whisper, "Why are you doing thiss?"

"Doing what?" With both his hands occupied the human could not gesture any degree of guile, but Eiipul divined it nonetheless.

"Allowing me a triumph. I could not touch you and wa.s.s clearly tiring. You patronize me, ssoftsskin!"

Flinx smiled tightly even as he wondered if the AAnn n.o.ble was familiar enough with humankind to recognize the significance of the expression. "No-truly, no. I submit for the same reasons I challenged. To obtain your help-and because your offspring are looking on. While I feel no hesitation to do you injury, I would not have you lose status before them and their friend."

Ignoring the imploring from his progeny to finish the fight, Eiipul drew back slightly. "Truly, you are the mosst AAnn of ssoftsskinss I have ever encountered or heard tell of. Your adoptive Tier sshould be proud. I would hear more of how you came to be one of them."

Flinx"s smile widened ever so slightly. "That may prove difficult if you rip my throat out or disembowel me."

"Truly that would inconvenience conversation." Raising his voice, he straightened atop the p.r.o.ne human and glared over at his offspring. His tail whipped victoriously back and forth behind him, clearing Flinx"s legs by barely a centimeter.

"The ssoftsskin ha.s.s proven himsself a worthy adverssary! On behalf of our family and our ancesstorss I have generoussly decided to grant him leniency. You will oblige me in thiss matter and upon hiss relea.s.se make no covert movess to sstrike him." Once again putting his jaws close to the human"s face, he whispered a second time. "I musst a.s.sk you to relea.s.se my right arm lesst my declaration ssmell of facetioussness." Flinx promptly complied, and then allowed Eiipul to "help" the vanquished human to his feet.

"Most impressive is your fighting, most impressive is your character, honored nye," Flinx murmured humbly. "I owe you my life."

Though expressively challenged due to their stiff, scaly epidermis, the looks on the faces of Eiipul"s offspring as they gazed admiringly at their victorious parent were probably worth a good quarter-jump in family status-at least in their young eyes. Significantly, Kiijeem"s expression was considerably less rapt-but he said nothing.

It was always useful, Flinx knew, when one could, to demonstrate to any AAnn, even a youth, the efficacy of diplomacy over force.

"There sstill remainss the matter of what to do with you, ssoftsskin." Eiipul studied his tall visitor contemplatively. The anger and antagonism that had been simmering within him previously had largely faded away, Flinx perceived. The AAnn"s emotions were more under control-and reflective of his continuing confusion. "I am sstill inclined to deliver you to the proper authoritiess, except ..."

"Except ...," Flinx prompted him, adding a second-degree genuflection of appreciation.

"Thiss inssane sstory of yourss. I know of many ssentientss, AAnn and otherwisse, who found themsselvess driven to death by their delussionss. But you sstrike me as rational as well as intelligent. Your tale and your actionss sseem to me to be sstrongly at oddss with one another. You believe in thiss delussion of yourss sso deeply that you are willing to die to further propound it?"

"Such is the choice that life and circ.u.mstance have forced upon me," Flinx replied coolly.

His host hissed softly. "If you are lying, or delussional as are sso many of your kind, or if thiss iss ssome kind of conjurer trick, be a.s.sured that I will learn the truth. And then I will ssee to it that you are dealt with more harsshly than otherwisse would be the ca.s.se." His tone hardened. "Your unprecedented affiliation with a Tier family notwithsstanding."

Flinx had antic.i.p.ated and prepared for just such a response. "It won"t matter. If what I will try to show you fails to eventuate-and there is never any guarantee of success-then you can have me taken away and killed and the galaxy and everything in it goes to h.e.l.l anyway. So in the long run, it doesn"t matter."

His host gestured third-degree accord. "All fatalisstss are at peace with themsselvess until the knife beginss to cut. Then reality takess over." He shifted his stance, relaxing his legs. "What do I have to do to partic.i.p.ate in thiss "experience" you proposse to sshare? Nothing requiring elaborate or extenssive planning, I hope. I disslike the wa.s.sting of time. Not even a ssoftsskin sshould be late for hiss own demisse."

"That"s something I"m always prepared for," Flinx admitted, "though I admit to being receptive to regular postponements." Looking around, he searched for something soft. A hard species that had evolved in a tough environment, the AAnn did not go in for plush pillows and thick rugs. Settling on a small depression filled with ornamental colored sand, he walked over and lay down. It was as unyielding as the rest of the floor, but at least it was warmed from beneath. Responding to a gesture from her master, Pip darted away from where she had continued to confront the three young nye and rejoined him, settling down to coil herself contentedly on his chest. He regretted that he was about to unsettle her emotions. Hopefully they would become no less agitated than his own.

Realizing that he was as comfortable as he was going to get, he looked up and over at the increasingly bemused Lord Eiipul IX.

"We are ready to begin, n.o.ble nye. Or at least to try. Do you have anything that will help you sleep?"

It was always the same. It was always slightly different. Different and the same. It was always horrifying.

When he regained consciousness he was drenched in sweat. At least, he reflected, by letting himself drift and be drawn mentally outward toward the distant reaches of the universe while he was naked he did not come back to reality encased in cold, wet clothes. Forcing open his eyes, he immediately looked downward in the direction of the slight weight on his chest. Eyes open, Pip was struggling to uncoil her body and unfurl her wings. She did not sweat, but he could sense her distress. As a more primitive empath, she shared his feelings without knowing exactly what he felt. This time she seemed in an unusual rush to regain her strength.

Possibly it had something to do with the weapons Eiipul IXb and IXc were aiming in his direction.

Kiijeem stood behind them. At the moment, his own emotions were badly muddled. While looking askance at his friends, he was eyeing the rapidly reviving Flinx with the usual expectation and uncertainty-but this time there was also an unmistakable trace of the innate aggression he had radiated when he had first encountered the visiting human.

Something was wrong, Flinx realized. Pip was perceiving it as well, which explained why she was fighting harder than usual to recover from the experience. She was in a hurry to get airborne so that she could protect him. Reaching down, he put a hand around her body, pinning her wings against her sides as he exuded feelings of tranquility and rea.s.surance. She relaxed a little, but not completely. It was evident she did not altogether buy the contrived calm he was struggling to impart.

He was not sure that he did, either.

"What have you done to our patriarch?" Eiipul IXc hissed threateningly as she kept the pistol she was holding pointed directly at the center of Flinx"s torso. Eiipul IXc hissed threateningly as she kept the pistol she was holding pointed directly at the center of Flinx"s torso.

"Nothing more or less than what I said that I would try to do." In the absence of specifics he spoke as calmly as he could while facing the weapon. "Which was to attempt to provide incontrovertible proof of my story. I think that I did that. I felt felt that I did that, though in the state of stasis that is entered it"s difficult to be certain of anything." that I did that, though in the state of stasis that is entered it"s difficult to be certain of anything."

"Be certain of thiss," her brother growled at him. "If the damage perssisstss, the next sstate you enter will be that of extinction."

As soon as he felt enough of his strength had returned, Flinx sat up. "Damage?" A coldness began to creep up his spine. What had he done? "I don"t understand."

Without lowering their weapons, the twins stepped back. "Look upon the Lord Eiipul, and you will." The pistol jerked in the brother"s hand. "Try to flee and you will die, along with your gaudy pet."

Still holding tightly to Pip, Flinx locked eyes with the minidrag before depositing her gently onto his right shoulder. Under the circ.u.mstances he was having a difficult time sustaining the emotional illusion that all was well and everything was fine. Her gaze kept darting from him to the Eiipul offspring and back again. He struggled to contain her with his feelings even as his own were seriously conflicted.

Lord Eiipul IX lay on a horizontal resting platform nearby, where his offspring and Kiijeem had moved him. The nye was lying on his right side (AAnn did not lie on their backs), eyes wide open, nictating membranes retracted, staring into the distance. Bending toward him under the watchful, seething glares of his progeny, Flinx waved one hand slowly back and forth over his host"s face. The eyes did not respond. The AAnn was breathing slowly and steadily, but he did not react to any of Flinx"s physical stimuli nor indicate in any other fashion that he was still alive. Though no expert on AAnn physiology, Flinx felt fairly confident in voicing a diagnosis.

"Lord Eiipul is in shock."

"Truly," growled his daughter. "Tell uss ssomething we know not. Tell uss how to bring him back."

"I"d try some energizing medications," Flinx told her. "Anything organic and benign that"s likely to give the nervous system a jolt and ..."

"We have already done thuss." With his free hand Eiipul IXb pointed to a nearby spiral table. A small air injection device rested on the polished stone. Glancing at the attached opaque clip, Flinx had no way of telling whether it was full or empty. "Hiss body twitchess in ressponsse to sspecific sstimulantss, but otherwisse there iss no reaction. Sshouting ssimilarly provokess no ressponsse."

His mind, Flinx mused. It was his mind. The AAnn"s consciousness was adrift. Eiipul had not come back all the way. Clarity had survived the shared experience of a glancing contact with the Great Evil without suffering any permanent physical or mental side effects. Had he misjudged the mature nye"s capacity for coping with the same kind of contact? Was the makeup of the AAnn psyche so different that it could not survive a similar encounter?

Once more he looked down at the immobilized nye. Flinx felt he was rapidly running out of time. Traditionally impatient by nature, the younger Eiipuls would not wait forever before shooting to cripple him and then calling for a.s.sistance.

If he could not reach the benumbed AAnn physically or through eye contact, Flinx realized, then he would have to try to do so emotively.

Closing his eyes, he reached out. He had done this under pressure before. The present circ.u.mstances were no more or less threatening than a number of similar situations he had been forced to cope with.

At first he encountered nothing. Emotionally Lord Eiipul was a blank, an empty vessel devoid of feeling. Probing the alien emotive void, Flinx grew more and more apprehensive. If the paralysis extended this deeply, Lord Eiipul might truly be gone, his mind locked in permanent retreat.

There-something. A hint of awareness, cowering in the distance, enveloped in fear and anxiety. He reached toward it, projecting the most serene and soothing feelings he could muster. What he touched was not human. It was thoroughly AAnn. Certain sentiments, however, or at least variants thereof, are common to the majority of sentient species.

Dread and loathing, for example.

Lord Eiipul IX was the descendant of a long line of n.o.ble nye whose ancestry could be traced back to single-planetary origins. He was highly intelligent, a trained fighter, skilled in the arts of war, politics, economics, and status rivalry. Decades of intense compet.i.tion within the fierce upper strata of AAnn society had left him scarred but never bowed. There was nothing in the Empire, the Commonwealth, or the unknown dark galactic reaches framing both that he found intimidating. Gently, expertly, with skill born of years of ever-increasing experience, Flinx ma.s.saged and worked to repair the AAnn"s tattered emotions.

Lord Eiipul woke up screaming.

Nothing they had experienced in their young lives prepared Eiipul"s offspring or Kiijeem for that reaction. The brother dropped his pistol while his sister, stumbling backward until she pressed up against the nearest wall, just did manage to keep a shaky grip on hers. To his credit Kiijeem held his ground. Or perhaps he was simply unable to move. Frozen to the spot, he stared at the resting platform on which the n.o.ble, the estimable, the most venerable Lord Eiipul IX was twitching and tossing and shrieking like a newborn that had been cast into a fire. AAnn, especially those in their prime, did not react like this. No matter the circ.u.mstances, regardless of pain or suffering, they forever held fast to a legacy of stoicism that bordered on the fanatical.

Confronted with the unexpectedly violent reaction, Flinx did the only thing he could think of: bending over and reaching down, he wrapped both arms around the possessed nye and held him tightly as he tried to still the convulsions. While Pip slithered crazily around his neck and shoulders, he pulled the AAnn as close to him as he dared. Madly flailing claws slashed at his bare chest. Wincing from the pain, turning his head to one side to protect his eyes and face, Flinx ignored the cuts and lacerations as he concentrated on projecting feelings of rea.s.surance, comfort, and support onto the sufferer. Uncertain how to react, desperately wanting to help but afraid to interfere, the three younger AAnn remained as they were and just stared.

Slowly, agonizingly, little by emotive little, Flinx brought Lord Eiipul IX back. Back to reality, back to himself. The AAnn"s turbulent emotions calmed, the terror that had inundated him receded. An outer eyelid flickered, then the inner. His mind began to clear and his gaze to focus. Unhelpfully, the first thing they saw was the naked alien specter of Flinx hovering over him.

Instinctively, a four-fingered, claw-tipped hand rose and pushed. Releasing his hold with his left arm, Flinx quickly slid his right out from beneath the AAnn"s back and moved away. Blood from the nye"s unconscious, automatic clawing oozed down the tall human"s bare chest and belly to mix with the perspiration that always lingered from the debilitating mental journey.

Tentatively, Eiipul IXc stepped forward to peer down at the patriarch. "Honored ssire, we have been sso truly truly vexed! We have sseen you alive yet dead. We did not know what to do, how to help." Her gaze rose to the wounded softskin bleeding silently nearby. "We wanted to kill the vissitor-but at the ssame time we were afraid to kill it."

Grimacing, Lord Eiipul raised himself to a sitting position. His unusually rapid breathing was the only remaining indication that he had undergone an experience out of the ordinary. That, and the dark red liquid trickling from his mouth. His jaws had been clenched tightly enough to bleed.

He did not answer his offspring, did not respond to her declaration. Swinging his legs and tail off the platform, he placed his sandaled feet on the floor, stood motionless long enough to be confident of his balance, and then started toward the watching Flinx. On the third step he stumbled and nearly fell. Alarmed, the twins broke in his direction, but he waved them off. Using his tail for balance, he resumed his slow advance on the softskin.

Halting within arm"s reach, Eiipul turned his head to the left and exposed his throat. Within the room, no one breathed. When Flinx continued to hesitate, the n.o.ble reached out, took the human"s right hand, and placed it against his unprotected neck.

"You cannot kill me," he declared solemnly, "becausse I have jusst died."

As he observed the tableau, Kiijeem found himself remembering. Remembering how insistent he had been that the softskin allow him to share in the hazily described experience. How the human had refused and how angry he, Kiijeem AVMd, had become. He tried to swallow, only to discover that all the moisture had fled from his throat.

Flinx lowered his arm, allowing the AAnn to turn his head back to him once again. "I"m sorry. When words failed, I didn"t know any other way to convince you." Turning, he walked over to the sweeping window. Inclining his head, he bent slightly at the waist in order to look up at the night sky.

"It keeps speeding up. The phenomenon that"s coming this way. I and my friends-the few Commonwealth scientists who are also aware of it-thought it would be hundreds of years before the danger it poses would become imminent." Straightening as he reached up to caress Pip, he turned to look back at his host. "Each time I reach out to encounter it I"m less certain of that time frame. If it keeps on accelerating it"s conceivable it might burst out of the Great Emptiness and begin to affect the outer reaches of the galaxy as soon as in our lifetimes."

"Sshannt, ssoftsskin. There iss no need for additional empha.s.siss. I will not doubt your word again." Pivoting slightly, he finally addressed his offspring. "Sstand and breathe. I am alive, I am well, but I am changed. As would be anyone who had been obliged to sshare what I have jusst sshared." He looked back at Flinx. "I do not know how you did what you jusst did, human. Manifesstly, you are different. The how and why of that I leave to cleverer, more sspecialized mindss than mine. For now I will content mysself with that which I know. With what I have-experienced. I know it wa.s.s not an illussion. Would that it had been. You have accomplisshed what you intended, human. I believe your sstory."

For the first time that evening, Flinx allowed himself to unwind slightly. "Then you agree to hide me until my ship can return to pick me up, and will help me travel to the pickup site un.o.bserved?"

Lord Eiipul regarded the softskin standing before him. "No."

Flinx could not hide his surprise. The AAnn"s emotions belied his response. Something was being left unsaid. "I don"t understand."

"As you have all too clearly sshown," Eiipul replied, "thiss danger iss one that threatenss all civilizationss, all living thingss. It iss not, sshould not, be the province of one sspeciess-far less a ssingle repressentative of that sspeciess. You bear a burden I would not sshare for the chance to be chossen Emperor.

"The Empire and the Commonwealth sstand at oddss yet pressently hold to an unea.s.sy peace. It iss plain to me that all ssuch conflict musst be put a.s.side lesst an unforesseen incident, an unpredictable encounter, might interfere with your effortss to try and counter thiss ... thiss ..."

Eloquent as Lord Eiipul was, he could not find the words to describe what he had just experienced. It was likely he did not wish to. Describing would require remembering. "While it iss unlikely you will be given overt a.s.sisstance, it musst be made certain that you are permitted to proceed with the a.s.surance that no facet of the Empire will in any way interfere with your effortss."

This was getting out of hand, Flinx saw. All he wanted was help in getting off Blasusarr safely and un.o.btrusively. But Lord Eiipul would not be denied.

"I ssee only one way to achieve ssuch a.s.surance, for good and for a certainty." He was watching the softskin closely. "What I jusst ssurvived. What you jusst sshowed to me. Can you-can you sshare it with more than one individual at a time?"

"I don"t know," Flinx answered honestly. "I myself have previously shared the contact with multiple minds, but they accompanied me unbidden, and they weren"t human."

"All to the good." Lord Eiipul sounded encouraged. "Neither am I. Neither are thosse with whom I wissh you to sshare sso that they too may be convinced, and sso that the Empire will do what it can to facilitate your effortss to ssave uss all."

Unable to stand by in silence any longer, Eiipul IXc stepped forward. "Honored parent, are you ssuggessting that the horror you jusst ssurvived be sshared with other nye?"

"It iss the only way," he told her with atypical gentleness. "I mysself would not accept the ssoftsskin"ss wordss by themsselvess. I had to be sshown. I had to experience experience. It would be the ssame with any otherss. They would not accept jusst an explanation any more than did I. Only by experiencing will they believe." He turned back to the waiting Flinx.

"I will take the preparatory sstepss. At the appropriate moment, I will make the necessary introduction." He gestured to where Flinx"s simsuit was neatly laid out on a polished section of floor. "I fear that for one more time, at lea.s.st, you musst employ your ingeniouss dissguisse."

Flinx took a deep breath. It was evident from his emotions as well as from his words that Lord Eiipul was not going to be dissuaded from the course of action he had chosen. On the positive side, Flinx had to admit that it would be very useful in the furtherance of his activities if the representatives of the AAnn Empire, wherever and whenever he might happen to encounter them, had been specifically instructed to give a certain tall young human freedom to proceed wherever and however he wished.

"All right," he replied resignedly. "If you think it"s that necessary. With whom do you want me to share? Mates of yours? Other family members?" He mulled other possibilities. "Representatives of the military?"

Lord Eiipul gestured first-degree inclusiveness underscored with pure unconditionality. "As the threat you sshowed to me iss the greatesst that can be imagined, sso therefore musst the greatesst be expossed to it. I sshall a.s.sume the necessary rissk."

Flinx was instantly on guard. "What risk?"

The AAnn met his gaze unflinchingly. "I will make arrangementss sso that you can sshare your experience of thiss galaxy-wide threat with the Imperial Gathering and with the Emperor himsself."

Startled hisses rose from his offspring. "Honored ssire, no!" Eiipul IXb rushed his parent, followed closely by his sister. Flinx noted that Kiijeem held back. This was a family matter. No matter what opinion he might hold, no matter what insight he felt he could bring to the discussion, the twins" friend would remain aloof from the debate. If the outcome went well, he stood to benefit. If it ended in disaster, he could claim noninvolvement. No wonder the strongest emotion Flinx read from his young friend was satisfaction. The feelings currently being broadcast by the two Eiipul progeny const.i.tuted another emotive state entirely.

They were frightened, as well as indignant.

"Conssider, my lord," his daughter was pleading, "that if the unprecedented confrontation you proposse sshould fail, it could mean the end of your career."

"Not only your career." Her brother was politely irate. "The family Eiipul itsself could be ruined. Everything that our ancesstorss have built, our illusstriouss family hisstory, our sstanding within the Empire-all could be ssacrificed on the altar of a ha.s.sty decission. We could losse everything-even our name."

Their patriarch was silent. For a moment Flinx thought the fretful twins might have persuaded Lord Eiipul to change his mind. But as it turned out he was only gathering his thoughts.

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