He suddenly found himself wishing he was somewhere, anywhere, else. That he did not have to explain himself yet again, to still another cl.u.s.ter of sentients standing in judgment of him and his motives. And yet again, he had no choice.
"There are within the Commonwealth humans who want to kill me. There are in the government those who want to arrest me. And there are those in the United Church who want to question me. Given the state of affairs surrounding my person, you"ll understand when I say I can only reveal myself and what I know to a chosen few."
"And what, tssaak tssaak, do you you want out of all thiss?" the Emperor of all the AAnn asked him sagely. want out of all thiss?" the Emperor of all the AAnn asked him sagely.
"The same thing I"ve wanted all my life," Flinx told him. "To be left alone."
"Yet your conviction that ssomehow you are vital to any attempt to counter thiss oncoming peril meanss that you cannot be left alone. But at the ssame time you cannot a.s.sk for all the help you would wissh becausse thosse whosse a.s.sisstance you might sseek would be interessted in other detailss of your "sstate of affairss," as you put it." Navvur W gestured second-degree empathy. "What a dreadful disscord musst be your life!"
Flinx felt obliged to protest. "There are good moments."
It sounded weak even to him.
"You do not ssay "good dayss."" Navvur had not been chosen supreme leader of his kind because he lacked insight. "There iss much that our resspective sspeciess do not have in common, but I believe an appreciation of irony iss sshared by both. From what you tell me, it would appear that you are ssafer here, at thiss moment, ssurrounded by ssworn enemiess of your government, than you would be on many of your own worldss." Teeth that were still sharp flashed in jaws that could still bite. "You may be the only ssoftsskin within hundredss of parssecss who iss ssafe from being sslain at the firsst opportunity."
Flinx was not startled by the Emperor"s observation, but neither had he expected it. "I don"t feel safe anywhere. It may be my destiny to never feel safe anywhere."
One of the shaken n.o.bles who had suffered and survived Flinx"s shared experience spoke up. "Doess it plea.s.se you to know that you have made many of uss uss feel far less ssafe?" feel far less ssafe?"
Flinx looked over at her. "I don"t like frightening people. That was not my intent." He looked at Lord Eiipul, then back at the Emperor. "You forced my hand."
"To our benefit, or to our detriment." A pensive Navvur gestured second-degree disquiet. "I wonder."
"I only share the truth," Flinx mumbled unhappily.
"Truly," hissed several thoughtful onlookers.
"So-what is your decision, honored Navvur? What are you going to do with me?" Standing alone, Flinx waited.
In addition to a single set of round eyes, a sizable number of reptilian ones were focused on Navvur W. The Emperor appeared to be meditating. But it was only for show. He had already decided how to deal with this exceptionally curious softskin who laid claim to a Tier name, hissed eloquently the true tongue, and had demonstrated the ability to foresee an apocalypse-or merely frighten. Aware of his audience, he gathered his Imperial self.
"Either you are an honesst mutation of a mosst unique ssort-or you are the cleveresst conjurer in the sspiral arm. One thing I have decided you are not iss a sspy. You talk far too much to be a deviouss agent of your or any other government. You have sshared or sshammed a wonder. My heart tellss me it doess not exisst. My head-my head fearss that it may.
"Only becausse of that ssmall and implaussible possibility I have decided to sspare your life."
Animated hissing rose from the circle of AAnn that surrounded the softskin and the Emperor. Some of it voiced accord, some hostility, some was simply supportive of whatever choice their Emperor chose to make. Among the congregation of attentive nye, Lord Eiipul IX looked relieved most of all.
"Thank you, venerable Navvur." Flinx"s grat.i.tude was heartfelt. "If it turns out that I"m able to do something, it will preserve the AAnn as unreservedly as it does my own kind."
The Emperor spoke without looking at the tall human. "I have the feeling thosse of uss currently alive will never know whether you ssucceed or fail."
"I will find a way to let you know," Flinx was surprised to hear himself replying.
Navvur looked up anew. "You truly believe the reality of what you have sshown, don"t you? If it iss sso, then you will need all the help you can get." A hand gestured at the closely packed crowd of n.o.bles and advisers. "I fear that we cannot a.s.sisst you directly in your effort. But it iss perhapss possible to improve the climate in which you apply yoursself.
"As ssomeone of your wide-ranging knowledge iss doubtless aware, though no active sstate of warfare pressently exisstss between the Empire and the Commonwealth, with sso many pointss of tangency and expanssion, minor unofficial dissputess frequently arisse."
Flinx gestured third-degree comprehension, even though he knew that the "minor unofficial disputes" the Emperor was referring to were usually the result of AAnn probing and aggression as the minions of the Empire worked to continuously test the limits of Commonwealth tolerance.
"I will composse and have issued a command," Navvur continued, "ordering that all ssuch dissputess are to be rigoroussly avoided for"-he considered briefly-"a period of one Commonwealth year from the date of your departure from Blasussarr. Thiss will enssure that any exertionss on your behalf that might take place in border regionss are not interrupted or thwarted by one of the petty missundersstandingss that sseem to plague the relationsship between your government and an Empire that sseeks only peace."
Sure it does, Flinx mused while prudently withholding comment. Anything he could say was likely to be counterproductive, and this was neither the time nor place to discuss the complex issue of ongoing hostility between their respective species. It appeared that his humble efforts to achieve little more than safe pa.s.sage off Blasusarr for himself and Pip had unintentionally accomplished rather more; what amounted to a year"s worth of interstellar peace between the Empire and the Commonwealth. It was not the first time his labors had produced an unexpected result.
Irony, he reflected, was the spice of circ.u.mstance.
"Thiss directive will not be publicized." Turning a slow circle, Navvur gazed warningly at his subjects, meeting the eyes of as many as he possibly could. "No word of it iss to pa.s.s beyond The Eye. Were it to become widely known, sspecific ssoftsskinss and particular nye might try to take advantage of it." When he completed his formal pirouette he was once again facing Flinx.
"I can pledge you no more than a year of peace between our peopless. Any attempt to extend it for a longer period of time would be to deny our very sselvess-and place even my possition in jeopardy." He gestured second-degree resignation. "Thosse not privy to the experience you sshared would not undersstand."
"I know," Flinx told him. "I realize the difficulty." The majority of humans and virtually no thranx would not have empathized with the Emperor"s position-but Flinx did. Here was another chameleon like himself, he mused. An individual for whom change was a constant, who could never relax if he expected to survive. In addition to belonging to separate sentient species, however, they were clearly marked by one other key difference.
He doubted the Emperor Navvur W spent part of every day worrying about his sanity.
Over the course of the following ten days spent waiting for the return from s.p.a.ce-plus of the reconfigured Teacher Teacher, he saw and experienced more of AAnn society and culture than specialized xenologists who had spent years studying and trying to understand the belligerent, dangerous, expansionist civilization that had long been in conflict with the Commonwealth. This despite the fact that his expanded circle of hosts did their best to keep his presence in Krra.s.sin a secret from the local population. While there was no potential problem in allowing resident AAnn a glimpse of a visiting human, paradoxically the Emperor and his inner circle were cognizant of Flinx"s desire to keep his presence on Blasusarr hidden from his own kind. So to prevent word from reaching the staff of the one official, accredited Commonwealth mission in the capital, Flinx"s excursions were conducted in secrecy and with him wearing his simsuit.
Those among the Imperial advisers with an inclination to engineering who had a chance to examine him close-up were fascinated by the intricate camouflaging ensemble. Flinx readily identified with their interest, having himself on prior occasions been forced to deal with AAnn who had disguised themselves as humans. His mastery of their language and the revelation that he was an officially adopted member of a recognized Tier only increased his curiosity value. Though he continued to move about Krra.s.sin and its vicinity undercover, he found that he had become something of a minor celebrity among those a.s.signed to escort him.
All the more reason, he felt, to take his leave as soon as possible. But with no means of contacting the Teacher Teacher while it was making its way back to the Blasusarrian system from deep s.p.a.ce, he could only wait, be thankful he was still alive, and do his best to satisfy the curiosity of his hosts while hiding his true ident.i.ty, abilities, and resources from as many as possible. while it was making its way back to the Blasusarrian system from deep s.p.a.ce, he could only wait, be thankful he was still alive, and do his best to satisfy the curiosity of his hosts while hiding his true ident.i.ty, abilities, and resources from as many as possible.
As promised, several Blasusarrian ten-days pa.s.sed before the communit built into his suit signaled for attention. It was not necessary for him to check the signal"s origin. Only one offworld individual knew his location, and it was not organic.
"I have successfully entered orbit in the new guise of a private research vessel from Orakk.u.m." Though anxiety was not an emotion programmed into the Teacher"s Teacher"s manifold speech patterns, Flinx chose to believe that he could hear a smidgen of concern in the message. "Please acknowledge if you have survived." manifold speech patterns, Flinx chose to believe that he could hear a smidgen of concern in the message. "Please acknowledge if you have survived."
"Survived and thrived, I think-much to my own surprise."
"I understand survived," the ship responded promptly, "and am joyed to receive the information. In the context of the circ.u.mstances that mandated my hasty departure, I do not comprehend "thrived.""
Alone in the comfortable and well-secured first-floor room that had been provided by the government for the duration of his stay, Flinx was able to speak freely. He had discovered that he enjoyed lying on his back in the basin of heated sand that was a favored means of relaxation among the AAnn. It reminded him of the picture-perfect beaches on Nur.
"You know how sometimes I enter into seemingly simple situations and they blow up out of all proportion?" he began.
"Not you, Flinx. I have never observed that happening to you."
The ship"s exterior might have been reconfigured during its hiatus in s.p.a.ce-plus in order to fool Planetary Security, Flinx mused, but its integrated sarcasm remained unchanged.
"Several incidents of significance have occurred in your absence." Head turned slightly to the right, he addressed the communit pickup inside the head of the suit, neatly shucked nearby. "The bad thing is that many more AAnn have become aware of my presence here. The good thing is that I have been able to turn that to my advantage."
"I cannot conceive," the Teacher Teacher responded, "of how your presence on Blasusarr becoming known to additional AAnn could in any way become advantageous." responded, "of how your presence on Blasusarr becoming known to additional AAnn could in any way become advantageous."
"A few months ago, neither could I," he replied. "I"ll explain it all when I"m back on board." Sitting up on the sand, Flinx let the heated grains trickle through his bare toes.
"When should I send down a shuttle?"
Flinx looked around his chamber. Normally spare and utilitarian, it was filled with gifts from AAnn acquaintances and admirers. Dominating the display was a glistening, vitreous sculpture that was a present from Lord Eiipul IX himself and his extended family. Unexpectedly, Flinx found his eyes growing moist. Chraluuc of the Ssaiinn should have been there with him.
"That won"t be necessary. Provide your coordinates. It would be impolite not to offer my hosts the opportunity to supply the necessary extra-atmospheric transportation."
"Your "hosts" ... ?" The shipmind contemplated possible interpretations of this seemingly contradictory designation. "You are not confined or under duress and are speaking freely?"
"a.n.a.lyze my speech and decide for yourself."
As a matter of security, the Teacher Teacher had already done so. "It is clear that a most remarkable turn of events has taken place in my absence. Not the first time something like it has occurred." had already done so. "It is clear that a most remarkable turn of events has taken place in my absence. Not the first time something like it has occurred."
Flinx shrugged, though there was no one present to see it. "It"s how I was raised, ship. To adapt to difficult circ.u.mstances."
"I suppose I should not be surprised. I will provide the coordinates. When should I expect your arrival?"
"As soon as my hosts can arrange it. I"ll alert you." Unexpectedly, he heard himself asking, "Everything is all right with you? Have you been seeing to the maintenance of the plants in the lounge?"
"My physical condition is excellent. Your decorative vegetation appears to be flourishing. Some of the oldest required tr.i.m.m.i.n.g. In contrast, certain more recent arrivals exhibit what appears to be a kind of internal biological restraint that keeps them from overgrowing. No doubt a xen.o.botanist would find such cytological self-discipline of more than pa.s.sing interest."
"Maybe I"ll do some research myself once I"m back aboard," Flinx commented absently.
Rising from the sand, he stood motionless while blowers gently removed adhering granules from his back and lower body. Whereas the virtually moisture-free particles slid neatly off the slick scales of the AAnn, the therapeutic grains tended to stick to his sweaty mammalian epidermis. Bending over, he brushed at his legs to hasten the process. Nearby, Pip"s head emerged from where she had contentedly buried herself in the depths of the heated basin.
"Get out of there. We"re leaving," he murmured.
Leaving for work, he told himself. Leaving for destiny, whatever it now had in store for him. His immediate future, at least, was determined. That in itself was something of a change for him. Once back on board the Teacher Teacher he knew he could look forward to weeks and probably months of continuing to search for a single alien mechanism that could by now be anywhere in the Blight-or even beyond it. Not a needle in a haystack, but an atom in the needle in the haystack. Yet again the prospect of locating the wandering Tar-Aiym weapons platform struck him as hopeless. But he had promised his friends and mentors that he would try. he knew he could look forward to weeks and probably months of continuing to search for a single alien mechanism that could by now be anywhere in the Blight-or even beyond it. Not a needle in a haystack, but an atom in the needle in the haystack. Yet again the prospect of locating the wandering Tar-Aiym weapons platform struck him as hopeless. But he had promised his friends and mentors that he would try.
As he prepared to use the local communicator to contact his hosts and inform them of his intent to depart, it occurred to him that the search might not seem quite so hopeless if he had help.
His departure from Blasusarr was quietly momentous. As the first softskin to cement actual friendship as opposed to formal alliance with the Imperial government, he was eligible for a suitably honorific send-off. Instead, with the disappointed consent of his hosts, he departed in a small, unprepossessing military shuttle. The unaware crew was surprised to see so many important personages present to exchange farewells with a single tall but otherwise ordinary-appearing nye. Tentative inquiries as to the traveler"s ident.i.ty were met with an official response that was notable only for its lack of actual information. The crew did not press the matter. The solitary traveler was left to himself, and the crew went about the business of preparing for liftoff with the efficiency for which the AAnn military was noted.
"Farewell." Lord Eiipul IX exchanged final throat-grabs with the softskin in the simsuit. "I rissked a great deal on your behalf. I am glad I have nothing to regret. In fact, grissanb grissanb, my family"ss sstatuss iss sstrengthened becausse of it."
"I"m pleased." Stroking the side of his suit over the concealed resting pouch within, Flinx calmed Pip. She always seemed to know when they were about to leave for somewhere new.
Partings were concluded with other AAnn he had met. Last of all was young Kiijeem. His female parent was in the small group, her tongue flicking proudly.
"You have brought status to your family," Flinx told him.
"Truly." Slitted pupils regarded Flinx"s own as the young nye"s tail switched smoothly back and forth. "For ssomeone I sshould have killed on ssight, you have proven to be a usseful acquaintance."
"Keep that thought." Flinx smiled, careful not to show his teeth. "The useful part, not the bit about killing."
Kiijeem"s responsive gesticulation was a sign of third-degree poise. "I am AAnn. I can never put killing from my mind."
Flinx gestured understanding. "Then try to concentrate it where it will do more good than harm." He turned to start up the ramp that led into the waiting shuttle.
The leathery tip of a tail touched his spine. Looking around, he saw that Kiijeem remained reluctant to step back and rejoin the crowd of onlookers.
"Will I ever see you again, Flinx LLVVRXX of the Tier Ssaiinn? Will I ever be able once more to crouch and conversse with you about peopless and worldss beyond my ken, that I will only be able to learn of and vissit in the form of your kind and knowing desscriptionss?"
The AAnn being very fond of protocol and formalities, Flinx had antic.i.p.ated that the ritual surrounding his departure would be somewhat prolonged. He had expected to be impatient. He had expected to be tired. He had even expected to be bored.
He had not expected to be touched.
Flanking the entrance to the military shuttle, one of the soldiers who had been observing the ceremony let out a hiss of uncertainty as she noted the actions of the older and young nye on the ramp below. Their vacillation seemed a waste of time and energy. It made no sense to her. She glanced across at her colleague.
"I know that we were warned that there might be ssome a.s.spectss to thiss particular leave-taking that could be perceived as out of the ordinary-but for what possible rea.s.son could the pa.s.senger and the youth be gripping each other"ss handss like that?"
Tired from standing, the other soldier gestured third-degree lack of interest. "Who knowss? Perhapss they are preparing to fight."
As the AAnn shuttle decelerated in preparation for rendezvousing with what appeared to be an unusually ill-equipped Imperial scientific research vessel, Flinx found himself gazing in admiration at a ship he did not recognize. In the course of its stealthy sojourn in s.p.a.ce-plus the Teacher Teacher had completely revamped its exterior. Gone was the battered and slightly disreputable epidermis of an interworld cargo craft. In its place was an exterior adroit enough to fool the occupants of any Imperial craft. Once safely back within the boundaries of the Commonwealth, the ship would revert to a more mundane human-designed configuration. But until it pa.s.sed beyond the borders of the Empire, it would continue to cleave to its latest nonhuman schematic. had completely revamped its exterior. Gone was the battered and slightly disreputable epidermis of an interworld cargo craft. In its place was an exterior adroit enough to fool the occupants of any Imperial craft. Once safely back within the boundaries of the Commonwealth, the ship would revert to a more mundane human-designed configuration. But until it pa.s.sed beyond the borders of the Empire, it would continue to cleave to its latest nonhuman schematic.
A speedy, formal farewell to the commander of the shuttle, a transfer to a receiving lock equally disguised, and Flinx found himself back in the familiar, comforting surrounds of his ship. Outside, lit by the actinic glow of desert-swathed Blasusarr, the AAnn shuttle was pulling away. Once at a safe distance it ignited its main drive and dropped swiftly toward the world below. A world that he had experienced and come to know perhaps better than any other member of his species.
The acc.u.mulation of arcane knowledge and esoteric experiences was a habit he had no desire to break, he mused as he made his way through the familiar corridors.
"Welcome back." The shipmind greeted him as he emerged into the command center. His favorite cold drink was waiting for him on one arm of the pilot"s chair. He took the drink but did not sit down, preferring to sip as he stood and stared out the curved, sweeping port. Beyond, Blasusarr gleamed in the light of its star. He had gone where few humans had gone before him and had done so in a manner previously unimaginable. His achievement far exceeded anything he had dared hope for when he had arrived weeks ago. Not only was he leaving the Imperial homeworld in one piece, he was departing having made new friendships, having acquired new knowledge, and having secured (even if only for a year) a peace treaty between AAnn and humanxkind.
Not bad for a few weeks" furtive and highly illegal stopover, he reflected.
"It"s good to be back. Did you miss me?"
"I was naturally concerned for your well-being," the ship replied equably. "The question implies application of an emotion to which I am not mathematically privy." There was a slight, probably programmed pause. "I do admit to wanting to know how you went from being flushed and chased from hiding to returning via an AAnn Imperial military shuttlecraft. I feel this perceptible contradiction const.i.tutes a deficiency in my database that is seriously demanding of redress."
Sighing deeply, Flinx turned from the port and slumped down in the chair. "I"ll fill you in on all the details in the course of our journey. Prepare departure."
"Should I take up again the previous vector?" was the prompt query. "So that we may continue with the prior search? Which, I am compelled to point out, has suffered recently from your detour and a delay that can only be described as grievous."
"I know, I know," Flinx muttered irritably. "I swear, you"re like an old mother hen sometimes!"
"An important function of my programming, though in no wise avian. You yourself have repeatedly remarked on its importance."
"I know that, too." Flinx chugged the rest of his drink, deliberately chilling his mouth and throat. The headache that was coalescing at the back of his skull had nothing to do with the temperature of the liquid he was imbibing. "First Jast, then Visaria, then Gestalt, and now here." Not for the first time he wished for a face he could look into, talk to, evaluate. But there was only the interior of the ship, with its molded walls and silent, compliant instrumentation. From the time he had accepted the ship from its builders, the Ulru-Ujurrians, he had refused to a.s.sign it a visible avatar.
He saw enough faces in his dreams.
"I"ve learned something from each of those visits to each of those worlds, ship. And the one thing I"ve decided is that I can"t go on with this search by myself. I"ve got to have help. Support. And not just moral support of the kind offered by Bran and Tru. I don"t think I can go on with this alone."
"You are the only one who might establish contact with the wandering Tar-Aiym weapons platform that is the object of the search." The ship"s tone was simultaneously cool, unforgiving, and sympathetic. "What kind of help could you possibly need? Or find useful?"
"I"m trying to clarify." Wrestling with words and concepts, Flinx struggled to explain himself to a machine. "It"s just-it"s too much for one person. It"s too much for me anymore." Looking up he found himself staring, in lieu of a face, at one of the several visual pickups that lined the room. "Maybe, at heart, that"s the real reason I"ve kept off going back into the Blight."
The ship lapsed into silence. When it felt that enough time had pa.s.sed and the stillness had endured long enough, it inquired just as if there had been no discussion preceding its request, "Vector?"
Without hesitation this time, Flinx supplied one.
The Teacher Teacher did not delay in reacting. "You gainsay your own words. You contradict your own emotions. You do not seek the indicated destination in search of help. You have another motive. Reasons that have nothing to do with the critical search on which we are embarked." Programming aside, the ship"s tone was unabashedly accusatory. did not delay in reacting. "You gainsay your own words. You contradict your own emotions. You do not seek the indicated destination in search of help. You have another motive. Reasons that have nothing to do with the critical search on which we are embarked." Programming aside, the ship"s tone was unabashedly accusatory.
"I understand your reaction, but you"re wrong," Flinx insisted. "Or half wrong. Yes, I have an ulterior motive for wanting to go there. But it"s also where I hope to find help. The kind of help I most need. Once we"re safely back in s.p.a.ce-plus I"ll fill you in on the details and try to make you understand. I know it"s not an easy concept for a machine to grasp."
"I already understand," the shipmind grumbled. "You can pa.r.s.e all you want, but it will take some effort on your part to convince me that I have left anything out of my judgment. A detour is still a detour."
That was all the Teacher Teacher had to say on the subject. Despite Flinx"s demurral it knew enough about humans to follow his reasoning. had to say on the subject. Despite Flinx"s demurral it knew enough about humans to follow his reasoning.
Just as it knew enough to recognize an equivocation when it heard one....