cheeks were flushed with excitement, her eyes dilated, she was practically panting from desire. With each word I spoke, her scent became stronger, more powerful, harder to resist.
"Ren-"
"G.o.d, Violet! I want nothing more than to make love to you right now."
She was staring deeply into my eyes; her heart was pounding. I could hear the roar of
her blood rushing in my ears and it called to me.
"Y-you do?" she asked, brushing her lips across mine ever so lightly.
She had barely touched my mouth, yet I was melting. Liquid heat spread throughout my
entire being, the antic.i.p.ation of how it would feel to kiss her, really kiss her, setting
every nerve aflame.
"To worship you," I admitted, reaching out to caress the side of her face. "To take you to the heights of pa.s.sion, to push you to your limit and beyond. I could succ.u.mb to your charms so easily, Violet."
She shivered slightly. Her tongue darted out and swept across my lower lip, begging entrance.
"But I can"t," I finished stepping away, breaking the connection, creating distance. "It would be wrong of me."
"Wrong?" she repeated, slightly bewildered.
I continued to step back, nodding slowly. "I"m sorry, Violet," I told her. And I meant it, too. Then I walked out of the bathroom, out of my bedroom, down the stairs, and out the front door. If I wasn"t fearful of the ocean, I might have tried to swim for it. But the shipwreck that left me stuck for months in the Atlantic back in 1806 soured me on the water.
I sighed. The sun had just set, the temperature had dropped, and the rain had turned to snow. I tilted my head back, closed my eyes, and let the large fluffy flakes fall upon my face. The cold didn"t bother me. I knew that I could tolerate it. I could tolerate going without food for a few days too, for that matter. For several long minutes, I seriously considered the option of fleeing to the caves down by the sh.o.r.e.
"Ren? What on earth are you doing out here? It"s freezing and..."
My shoulders slumped in defeat. She"d probably track me down there, too. I realized then that I should have gone with the gay thing.
"It"s snowing!" she exclaimed, placing one bare foot hesitantly on the top step. She looked up at the sky and held her hands out, trying to catch the snowflakes as they gently drifted down upon us, the long white sleeves of my starched shirt making her look like an angel.
"Be careful. The stone steps get awfully slip-"
The words were barely out of my mouth when her foot slid out from under her. Although I rarely have the need to, I can move very quickly, and within a blink of an eye I had her in my arms.
"Are you all right?" I asked her.
"My ankle, I think I twisted it."
I carried her back inside, kicked the door closed and stood there for a moment, contemplating my next step. I figured that my escaping to the caves was now completely out of the question. Humans need food and water. And with a b.u.m ankle she wasn"t going to be able to fend for herself until Pete could come and take her away. On the other hand, she wasn"t going to be traipsing around and sneaking up on me with her flaming hair, sensual mouth and those deep green eyes that I was once again getting lost in. I could have contact with her on my terms...in small, tolerable doses.
"This time you"re definitely staring at my eyes," she murmured softly.
"A man could get lost in those eyes," I whispered more to myself than to her, feeling suddenly self-conscious and uncertain.
Violet smiled at me and began to play with the hairs at the base of my skull. "I can"t quite figure you out, Byron Renfield."
"That makes two of us," I admitted as I started to climb the stairs.
Violet leaned in even closer to me, her lips brushing up against the sh.e.l.l of my ear. I could feel the warmth of her breath on the side of my neck and I could feel the soft outline of her breast pressing against my chest.
"Where are you taking me?"
"Bed. You rest. I cook. We eat."
In the s.p.a.ce of an hour this woman had come into my home and reduced me to
speaking like some ridiculous parody of a cave man. This was getting to be humiliating. I walked into the guestroom, deposited her on top of the antique sleigh bed, and turned to leave, secure in the fact that she couldn"t follow me and that I just needed a few minutes alone to regain my composure.
"Why would it be wrong?"
That stopped me. Not the question itself so much. It was more the tone of it. Insecure.
She shouldn"t doubt herself. She was perfection.
"Ren, why would it be wrong? You, um, you made it sound pretty enticing."
I couldn"t turn around. I couldn"t look at her. "It"s not you. It"s me."
"Which really means it"s me," she said.
"You make me think things, imagine things, that I can"t have and shouldn"t want. We"re
from two different worlds, you and I," I told her, feeling weighed down by guilt.
"I"m from earth, Ren. Where are you from?"
"I was speaking metaphorically."
"Ren, there"s obviously an attraction between us, a connection-"
My heart was racing, pounding in my chest. I was holding on to the doorjamb, hovering on the threshold, trying to take just one...more...step. And I couldn"t. Correction. I didn"t want to.
"d.a.m.n it!" I growled. "Why did you have to come here? This isn"t a good time for me, what with Grace and Fred. I don"t need this now, this distraction, this temptation. Do you have any idea how hard this is to resist?"
She rolled onto her side and my shirt rode up, slightly exposing her thigh. I could smell her arousal again.
"You seem to be doing a regrettably good job."
"It"s been a long time since I"ve been with a woman, and..."
"And?"
"Violet, I"ve never been with a woman like you. But since you walked into this house, I"ve thought of little else."
"A woman like me, two different worlds. What are you saying, exactly? Look, I may not live on my own island but-"
"This has nothing to do with money."
"Are you sure?"
"Completely," I said. "I can"t get close to you, Violet."
I turned to walk out adding, "I can"t get close with anyone," before closing the door behind me.
7:04:59 PM brenfield: Thank G.o.d you"re there. Can you come over? I need to have s.e.x. Bad.
7:05:17 PM iamrita: Smooth Byron, really smooth.
7:05:41 PM brenfield: Is that a "no"?
7:06:15 PM iamrita: I haven"t seen or heard from you in six months. m.a.s.t.u.r.b.a.t.e.
7:06:50 PM brenfield: I tried. It"s not working. I"m not above begging at the moment.
7:07:14 PM iamrita: I can"t. I"m with someone. You said it would be all right. I get lonely, Byron.
7:07:23 PM brenfield: By someone do you mean a...person?
7:07:45 PM iamrita: What? No! Wait a minute...
7:07:58 PM brenfield: Gotta go.
7:08:36 PM iamrita: Have you f.u.c.ked her?
7:08:42 PM brenfield: Who?
7:08:59 PM iamrita: The human. The one that has you all worked up.
7:09:07 PM brenfield: No 7:09:16 PM iamrita: But you want to?
7:09:18 PM brenfield: No 7:09:21 PM iamrita: Whew! You scared me for a minute.
7:09:33 PM brenfield: I want to make love to her.
7:09:38 PM iamrita: No!!!
7:09:48 PM brenfield: I know! It"s horrible. What the h.e.l.l am I supposed to do? She"s here in the house.
7:10:03 PM iamrita: You could kill her. She"s going to die eventually anyways so not a big loss, really.
7:10:25 PM iamrita: Byron? You there?
7:10:41 PM brenfield: I"m trying to think. I"m having a major crisis here. Could you maybe try to be helpful?
7:11:04 PM iamrita: Sorry. I"m thinking. How"s my portfolio doing, btw?
7:11:21 PM brenfield: Fine. But if you"re not going to remain at my beck and call enticing me with meaningless s.e.x anymore, why am I handling your investments?
7:12:24 PM iamrita: Because I"m your friend?
7:12:38 PM brenfield: You"re offering friendship? Right this minute I"d rather have you blow me.
7:13:11 PM iamrita: You know I"d give up Chad in a heartbeat, Byron. You only need to ask.
7:13:48 PM brenfield: Chad? His name is Chad? You"re kidding.
7:13:14 PM iamrita: No. And he"s at the door. I"ll e-mail if I think of anything. And Byron? We"ve always been friends.
She was sleeping. Sprawled out on the guest bed, the edge of my shirt riding up just enough to tease me. There was a chill in the room. I set her dinner tray down on the dresser, then knelt before the fireplace and quietly removed the grate. It took me just a few minutes to get it started. I"d had lots of practice after all, centuries worth.
I sensed it the moment she woke. I didn"t have to turn around. I knew. She was watching me.
"The fire will take the chill out of the air in a minute or two. I brought you dinner."
"What about your dinner?" she asked.
"I"ve already eaten," I lied. "Let me help you under the covers, and then I"ll position the tray."