But Jase said, after the young woman had left, "I"ll take mine to my room, if you don"t mind, nadi. I"m feeling unsteady."
Jase rose. Bren did. One part of him said in spite of Jase"s evasions and in spite of his anger he should go over to Jase and put his arm around his shoulders. He should offer - something of an emotional support.
But he didn"t. As Jase never quite addressed him with the intimate form in Ragi, though he did it toward Jase.
Jase had never made such gestures toward him in that interpersonally sensitive language. Maybe Jase didn"t think he was of status to do it. Maybe there was another reason.
Whatever it was, they"d never made such gestures toward one another, certainly not intruded so far as an embrace, between the only two humans on the mainland. He"d held out a hand to welcome Jase when he"d pulled him from the capsule and into the world. Jase had accepted that hand, but hadn"t met him with the enthusiasm or the openness the transmissions from the ship had prepared him to expect.
The one gesture, nothing more, from either side. And somehow they"d found no way to begin again. Not in six months.
It seemed impossible to try in this situation, when sensibilities were raw-edged and, he admitted it, when he wasn"t sure he"d mean any such move toward a greater closeness with Jase, because of an anger the causes of which he wasn"t himself right now sure of.
He stood there as Jase walked away and out the door.
CHAPTER 6.
MAYBE HE SHOULD have made the try. Maybe, Bren thought, he should go after Jase all the same and make the gesture and try to sort out exactly why and at what he was angry, and why (he detected so, at least) Jase was so deeply angry, too.
But at such a juncture, what he did could intrude on sensibilities and shove the situation beyond all reason. He might instead do something he could bring to Jase as a peace offering. He might take measures to calm the situation. He might try to ease the strain on Jase and then talk to him, once the anger had settled. In both of them.
He saw the servant standing at the door, hands folded, waiting for his order, aware, perhaps that something was wrong.
"Is nand" Saidin still on duty?"
"I believe she has retired, nand" paidhi, but I doubt very much she is asleep. Shall I call her?"
"No. Is nadi Tano awake? Or nad" Algini?"
"Both or either, nand" paidhi. Shall I call them?"
"Do," he said; and stood sipping his drink until a quiet step and a shadow in the doorway advised him of presence.
"Nadi?" Tano asked. Both of them had come, and entered the room at his implied invitation.
"Nadiin," he said, intensely aware how they would blame themselves for a failure in information. "Jase says his father has died. He had this news from Mospheira, he says, four days ago, and complains he was not able to contact his mother on the ship because security couldn"t clear a call to the ship or contact me. Are we able to remedy this?"
"I will make immediate inquiry, nand" paidhi," Algini said, ever the proper, to-the-point one; and Tano, equally atop any business he was supposed to monitor: "The record shows the call from Mospheira. The staff has it on tape. It was in Mosphei". Do you wish to hear it?"
"I do." It was his business to. Someone had better find out what was going on, and how much else that message had contained, and he was the one who admitted to speaking the language. He was sure that certain atevi did, even that certain atevi close to him were staying up nights increasing their fluency at Jase"s expense, while Jase persisted in resorting to human language, but with what accuracy atevi were understanding the biology behind the vocabulary, he was far from certain. "Did nand" Jase seem upset?"
"That was not in the report, nadi. He stayed to his room a great deal, that was all. One phone call came to him from Mospheira, late in the evening, four days ago. No others are on the record."
He didn"t have enough information to cue them to report information they might not know they had.
More, he had to be extremely careful. Everything at the interface of atevi responsibility and human emotions was difficult and subject to error. As long as he"d lived among atevi, he could guess one"s man"chi toward a lord, and he knew the specific man"chi of Tano and Algini and others toward Tabini, but he knew very little of their family ties or how man"chi to a lord fit into man"chi toward a mother or a father. He"d heard heard Tano speak of his own father, and of a desire to have the man"s good opinion, but he also knew that Tano had defied his father"s wishes to pursue a Guild career. He"d had Tano recommend relatives for posts as "reliable persons," a reliability one could attribute to man"chi, and the fact that it wasn"t biologically likely for treason to operate where man"chi existed. Tano speak of his own father, and of a desire to have the man"s good opinion, but he also knew that Tano had defied his father"s wishes to pursue a Guild career. He"d had Tano recommend relatives for posts as "reliable persons," a reliability one could attribute to man"chi, and the fact that it wasn"t biologically likely for treason to operate where man"chi existed.
He knew that Damiri had defied her clan to a.s.sociate herself romantically and politically (or should that be, politically and romantically) with Tabini, who was close to an ancestral enemy of her clan, a close neighbor in the Padi valley holdings, and certainly persona non grata with uncle Tatiseigi, the head of the Atageini clan. Antipathy on the part of a clan head (toward whom Damiri held man"chi) certainly hadn"t daunted Damiri - but then, few things did.
The one wisdom about atevi family relations that two centuries of paidhiin had gathered was that the bonds of affection that held a human family together were not only not present, they weren"t biologically possible.
Different hardwiring.
Different expectations.
Different familial relationships and different necessities.
One didn"t know, for instance, what an atevi child expected of his parents. Food and shelter up to a certain point, yes. The point of separation seemed to be about seventeen years, maybe twenty. That was all the acc.u.mulated experience could say. Anything else was rated speculative, in the textbooks. He himself tentatively theorized that as humans had to mature beyond emotional dependency on their parents, atevi had somehow to get out of man"chi toward their parents or the family unit would never mature. There had to be a psychological break, somewhere, for the culture to function beyond the family.
"If this were an ateva who had heard this news," he asked the two closest of his companions and guards, persons who, if they were human, he would have called friends, "what would other atevi expect of him? Princ.i.p.ally, what would other atevi expect him to feel, or do, under these circ.u.mstances?"
"If relations with his father were good," Tano said, "then one would expect sadness, nand" paidhi. He would go to his household. He would bury his father. He would confirm man"chi within his house and within his a.s.sociations."
Confirm man"chi. Confirm Confirm man"chi. With atevi, it was not only an overriding emotion. It was man"chi. With atevi, it was not only an overriding emotion. It was the the overriding emotion. A homing instinct under fire. The place you"d go. The person you"d rescue from a burning building. overriding emotion. A homing instinct under fire. The place you"d go. The person you"d rescue from a burning building.
"In what manner can one confirm confirm man"chi, nadi, if I may ask such a question? Please decline to answer if I cross some line of decency." man"chi, nadi, if I may ask such a question? Please decline to answer if I cross some line of decency."
"An expression, nand" paidhi. It"s an expression. One visits the household. One remembers. One a.s.sembles the living members of the household, for one thing, to know where their man"chi may lie now that this man"chi is put away. The household has to be rebuilt."
"The man"chi to the dead man is put away."
"Into the earth, nand" paidhi, or into the fire. One can only have man"chi to the living."
"Never to the dead?" He watched a lot of machimi plays, in the standard of which man"chi and its nuances was the pivot-point of treachery and action, double-crosses and last-moment decisions. "In the plays, nadi, this seems possible."
"If one believes in ghosts."
"Ah." It was a belief some atevi held.
And more had believed in them, as a matter of course, in the ancient world of the machimi plays. Such a belief in the supernatural didn"t include the two men present with him, he was quite sure. But belief in ghosts of course would tie directly into whether or not the dead could still claim loyalty.
"Also," Algini said in his quiet way, "the living will exact a penalty from living persons who might have been responsible. This does not not require a belief in ghosts. But in the old days, one might equally well exact a penalty of the dead." require a belief in ghosts. But in the old days, one might equally well exact a penalty of the dead."
He was curious. It went some distance toward explaining certain machimi, in which there seemed to be some actions of venerating or despising monuments and bones, heaving them into rivers and the like.
But it wasn"t wasn"t a solution for the problem he had. "Jase is upset," Bren said, "because he can"t reach his home or a.s.sure himself his mother is well." One didn"t phrase a question in the negative: atevi, if cued that one expected a negative, would helpfully agree it wasn"t likely. "Would security be concerned for an ateva"s actions under such a circ.u.mstance?" a solution for the problem he had. "Jase is upset," Bren said, "because he can"t reach his home or a.s.sure himself his mother is well." One didn"t phrase a question in the negative: atevi, if cued that one expected a negative, would helpfully agree it wasn"t likely. "Would security be concerned for an ateva"s actions under such a circ.u.mstance?"
"If this death was due to another person," Algini said, "one would expect to watch him carefully."
"Or if this death dissolved essential man"chi," Tano said, "A wife, for instance. Her clan would be free to act. A set of cousins ambitious to transfer man"chi to their their line. The family could break apart." line. The family could break apart."
"Would he -" He knew these men well enough to ask about very delicate, ordinarily undiscussed, matters. "Would an ateva under such circ.u.mstances feel feel such man"chi to the cousins, say, if they succeeded in transferring the clan"s man"chi to themselves and away from his father"s line?" such man"chi to the cousins, say, if they succeeded in transferring the clan"s man"chi to themselves and away from his father"s line?"
"Not necessarily," Algini said and, rare for him, a dark frown came to his face.
That warned him that perhaps he"d touched something more than theoretical with Algini. Or perhaps just inquired into too delicate an area of atevi emotion. So he asked no further.
And because it was necessary meticulously to inform the ones who guarded Jase: "Jase would like to go back to the ship to a.s.sure himself of his mother"s welfare. This he of course can"t do. He He says he wished to call the ship and was prevented because, he says, he couldn"t get through security to reach me to authorize it. I can only guess. He does follow rules and schedules meticulously. Perhaps this results from living on a ship in s.p.a.ce. I don"t know. And he may have been unwilling to face atevi with his emotions out of control - I"ve told him very emphatically not to do that. It may have prevented him from fully explaining his distress to security." It was a cold and an embarra.s.sing thing, to try to dice human feelings so finely that another mindset could grasp logically what was going on. "I would guess that he was already exhausted, either emotionally upset since I left or trying to achieve a good result - even my approval - on my return; and suddenly an emotional blow has. .h.i.t him when he was alone, immersed in a strange language, surrounded by strange faces, and under my instruction not to react emotionally with atevi." says he wished to call the ship and was prevented because, he says, he couldn"t get through security to reach me to authorize it. I can only guess. He does follow rules and schedules meticulously. Perhaps this results from living on a ship in s.p.a.ce. I don"t know. And he may have been unwilling to face atevi with his emotions out of control - I"ve told him very emphatically not to do that. It may have prevented him from fully explaining his distress to security." It was a cold and an embarra.s.sing thing, to try to dice human feelings so finely that another mindset could grasp logically what was going on. "I would guess that he was already exhausted, either emotionally upset since I left or trying to achieve a good result - even my approval - on my return; and suddenly an emotional blow has. .h.i.t him when he was alone, immersed in a strange language, surrounded by strange faces, and under my instruction not to react emotionally with atevi."
"Ah," Tano said, and both atevi faces showed comprehension. Of what - G.o.d knew.
"Remember," he said, "that this is a human being, and that this is not truly truly man"chi he feels but something as central to his being. Understand that he is under very extreme stress, and he"s trying not to react. But I have serious questions, nadiin, about the propriety of humans on that ship toward him, who may have slighted him in a major way. I want to know whether the ship tried to contact him, I want to know where that message went if someone attempted to contact him, and why he had to hear this bad news finally relayed from the island, from Yolanda Mercheson." man"chi he feels but something as central to his being. Understand that he is under very extreme stress, and he"s trying not to react. But I have serious questions, nadiin, about the propriety of humans on that ship toward him, who may have slighted him in a major way. I want to know whether the ship tried to contact him, I want to know where that message went if someone attempted to contact him, and why he had to hear this bad news finally relayed from the island, from Yolanda Mercheson."
"To whom has he attributed this failure of information?" Tano asked.
"I would a.s.sume, perhaps unjustly, to Manasi himself." Manasi was one of Tabini"s security, who"d moved in to run the security office when he had Tano and Algini off with him. "He suspects atevi have withheld it from him. This is much more palatable to him than the thought that his people did. But whatever the truth is, whether it leads to atevi or to his ship, I need to know know the truth, no matter how much truth I later decide to tell him." the truth, no matter how much truth I later decide to tell him."
"Nadi Bren," Algini said, "we will find the answer. We received no call from staff regarding any such matter."
"Nadiin," he said, "I have every confidence in you. I have every confidence in nand" Dasibi and in nand" Manasi. Please express it in your inquiry - please accuse no one. I leave it all to your discretion."
Look not to his clerical staff for fault, and not to Manasi, he strongly felt, rather to the aiji"s staff on the coast, at Mogari-nai, where the great dish drank down messages from s.p.a.ce and relayed them supposedly without censorship to him and through him to Jase. There had been politics at Mogari-nai, somewhere in the administration of that facility, which had withheld information from him on prior occasions, even against Tabini"s orders. It was a tangled matter of loyalties which one hoped, but not trusted, had been rectified last fall.
Look even - one could think it - to Tabini himself, who might have ordered the interception and withholding of that message for various reasons, including the reason that Bren-paidhi wasn"t at hand to handle the matter and they couldn"t know how Jase would react.
But Tabini Tabini would certainly have no difficulty reaching Tano and Algini if Manasi thought Jase was about to blow up. would certainly have no difficulty reaching Tano and Algini if Manasi thought Jase was about to blow up.
Information stalled in the system? Some message lying on a desk awaiting action? Perhaps. He was sure that the messages at Mogari-nai were gone over meticulously by atevi who could translate - and any personal message to Jase, as opposed to the usual routines, would raise warning flags, and possibly go to higher security, which could appreciably slow down transmission.
"Nadiin," he said, because he knew the extreme good will of these two men, and the conflict it might pose them, "if this thread should go under the aiji"s door, advise me but leave it untouched. It will be my concern."
"Bren-ji, one will immediately advise you if that should be the case."
That from Tano, with no demur from his partner. Their man"chi was to Tabini, to him only through through Tabini, and what they said was with the understanding, unspoken, that he knew and that they knew that certain atevi d.a.m.ned well understood Mosphei" and the dialect of the ship. Tabini, and what they said was with the understanding, unspoken, that he knew and that they knew that certain atevi d.a.m.ned well understood Mosphei" and the dialect of the ship.
He suspected most of all that troublesome elements existed somewhere within the defense organization that protected the coast; and that such might have interfered, again, at Mogari-nai - or here, within the walls of the Bu-javid.
Tabini himself understood more Mosphei" than he let on. Threads that went under the aiji"s door - or the hypersecret establishment of Mogari-nai - might cross and recross multiple times.
But an information slowdown could allow a critical situation to become a disaster. It also could signal a situation of man"chi; and that had to be fixed.
"That"s all I need," he said. "And don"t scant your own rest, nadiin-ji. Have some junior person begin the inquiry tonight. Pursue it tomorrow."
"Yes," Tano said, accepting orders which Bren feared he would not follow, nor would Algini. They slept on questions no better than he did.
The question was always - how how did atevi interpret what humans asked, and how well did they forecast human actions? The War of the Landing hadn"t happened because both sides had did atevi interpret what humans asked, and how well did they forecast human actions? The War of the Landing hadn"t happened because both sides had meant meant to go to war. to go to war.
So he sat, in the sitting room, in his robe, at a small, fragile desk, writing by hand in the formal court script, for Tabini: Aiji-ma, Mercheson-daja has informed nand" Jase of his father"s unexpected death, causes unknown.
Bearing in mind your other imminent concerns - - No, that wouldn"t do. He struck that last line: one left the aiji to the aiji"s concerns and didn"t express opinions on paper regarding Saigimi"s death being any any concern to the aiji at all. concern to the aiji at all.
I have informed my staff regarding nand" Jase"s normal behavior in such instances and inform you, aiji-ma, that I foresee a time of tension in the household. I am also concerned for meanings behind the failure of that message to get through to him or to me in a timely fashion. It seems to have come to Mercheson-paidhi first, which should not have happened, as Mercheson is not Jase"s superior, as the ship authorities well know. It was embarra.s.sing and distressing to him to have heard such news from a source who should have been less well-informed than he was. If this was the choice of the ship"s officers, there may be implications in their behavior regarding this matter: this could have benign causes, in either too great a zeal to protect Jase from knowledge of his have informed my staff regarding nand" Jase"s normal behavior in such instances and inform you, aiji-ma, that I foresee a time of tension in the household. I am also concerned for meanings behind the failure of that message to get through to him or to me in a timely fashion. It seems to have come to Mercheson-paidhi first, which should not have happened, as Mercheson is not Jase"s superior, as the ship authorities well know. It was embarra.s.sing and distressing to him to have heard such news from a source who should have been less well-informed than he was. If this was the choice of the ship"s officers, there may be implications in their behavior regarding this matter: this could have benign causes, in either too great a zeal to protect Jase from knowledge of his r family"s distress or knowledge that I was absent from the premises and therefore that nand" Jase was alone. Not benign, however, would be the determination of the officers of the ship that nand" Mercheson should obtain quicker and more up-to-date briefings than they allow to nand" Jase. These negative implications are certainly possible conclusions he might draw, and I am concerned.
Seeing, however, a third choice, that the withholding of information might be action emanating from your office, I have set my staff to learn the facts so that I may be accurate and prudent in a.s.sessments I present to you.
That, to pave the way for Algini and Tano.
Lest you concern yourself regarding nand" Jase, - Beyond any doubt, Damiri"s staff reported to her regularly, and Damiri reported what seemed useful to Tabini, right next door: so it was inconceivable she didn"t know by now everything the staff knew; Tabini probably knew, and he was sure both Jase"s behavior and his plus the fact he had called his two chiefs of security in for a conference had been amply reported.
- his behavior considering the extreme stress and my absence has been restrained and circ.u.mspect. Laboring under what may be a serious blow, he has nevertheless held himself for days from displaying feelings extremely difficult for a human to repress under far less strenuous conditions, all to obey my order not to display inexplicable emotion near atevi. I am greatly distressed that I was absent at the time and unable to provide advice or a.s.sistance to him, but he behaved very well indeed his behavior considering the extreme stress and my absence has been restrained and circ.u.mspect. Laboring under what may be a serious blow, he has nevertheless held himself for days from displaying feelings extremely difficult for a human to repress under far less strenuous conditions, all to obey my order not to display inexplicable emotion near atevi. I am greatly distressed that I was absent at the time and unable to provide advice or a.s.sistance to him, but he behaved very well indeed.
He disliked dissecting Jase"s private feelings. He truly disliked it. But he tried to be clinical, for the information of the one man - and the woman - who most needed to understand how well Jase had actually performed: Jase had occasionally upset the serving staff, who had witnessed prior explosions and must wonder what was the difference in the paidhi they knew and the one who came from the ship.
But staff storms settled, once staff was rea.s.sured that it was not their fault. Even in that, Jase was doing a very good job. Atevi had never seen the temper-storms even the most well-trained paidhi-candidates threw when language-deprivation set in, back in the university on Mospheira; and they didn"t see it in Jase - Jase"s were mere verbal explosions, restrained perhaps because of Jase"s own upbringing, or because the atevi world around him was so very quiet and void of anger.
But he did hope that Tabini"s good opinion would affect Damiri"s, and that Damiri"s would in turn become the staff"s judgment of Jason Graham. It would certainly make life easier in this apartment. He hoped, too, that it might ease the strain on Jase if he could, through Damiri, encourage the staff to understanding. He knew that information flowed in and out by the servants. And one wanted a good reputation.
Aiji-ma, I should add that he had exhausted himself In study to please me and to meet my schedule, unknowing to what extent news about to fall on him would challenge his self-control.
I should advise you of the normal course of human reaction to such a loss - first to think about past time and missed opportunities regarding his relative. In such a time the future has no map for him; his present is full of responsibilities to relatives which, in his situation, he cannot satisfy. Frustration may well manifest, which may lead to anger with himself or with me, or even with the dead. But this anger will in no wise threaten harm to me or to the staff...
G.o.d save us if he threatens the premises, he thought. He had only to look up and about him to see the contents of a veritable museum, the possession and the heritage of the Atageini clan, one of the most critical and dangerous alliances Tabini had forged, expressed in needlepoint draperies, in priceless carvings and fragile porcelain, in carpets which servants cleaned on hands and knees with dust-cloths.
He wishes to visit familiar places. He does not believe in ghosts and he does not believe in their intervention as far as I understand his religious opinions. He is brave and strong-minded or he would not have come down here. I request and hope for answers to my inquiries so that I can provide him some measure of a.s.surance and rapid contact with his mother and other relatives on the ship. I will monitor such conversations and be sure of the content of messages pa.s.sed.
I stand ready to report to you far better news regarding progress on the ship. Lord Geigi, who treated me as a very honored guest, and the manager of Patinandi in his district have shown me very encouraging progress; and likewise the laboratory at Gioli is making progress on the design of the engines and likewise on the test site. I have some concerns on the recent change of management at Ladisiri.
That was the computer design. The Determinists and the Absolutists were all but going at each other with knives, and the two most talented designers had been literally having tea with each other as two of their aides met in the hall in a set-to that other aides had had to break up by main force.
I have personnel recommendations which may separate and isolate members of the development teams at two sites rather than having discordant persons within the same facility. I do suggest that you a.s.sign persons to look into the issues involved, which are beyond my grasp, but which seem bitter and divisive and which are not, by advis.e.m.e.nts I have received, following the design specifications have personnel recommendations which may separate and isolate members of the development teams at two sites rather than having discordant persons within the same facility. I do suggest that you a.s.sign persons to look into the issues involved, which are beyond my grasp, but which seem bitter and divisive and which are not, by advis.e.m.e.nts I have received, following the design specifications.
Freely translated, intervene in Ladisiri, aiji-ma, before someone gets killed.
And considering the province was dualistic in philosophy, with no felicitous third, the aiji might threaten to move the research to a rival inst.i.tution. That That might get the attention of the two staffs. Certainly the two senior directors were oblivious to the quarrels, being lost in a probably productive debate on a design that, G.o.d save them, might be useful in advanced theory but was not going to fly on this ship. might get the attention of the two staffs. Certainly the two senior directors were oblivious to the quarrels, being lost in a probably productive debate on a design that, G.o.d save them, might be useful in advanced theory but was not going to fly on this ship.
I also urge, aiji-ma, that the needs of the aeronautical engineers should have precedence over further theoretical research at this time also urge, aiji-ma, that the needs of the aeronautical engineers should have precedence over further theoretical research at this time.
I consider this a matter of great delicacy and great urgency, which I shall manage according to your orders or leave to more tactful persons at your discretion.
It was the one truly unmanageable problem they had with the project, give or take a few operational difficulties which were not at that level. This one - the aiji might have to straighten out by calling in the lord of the province and having an urgent discussion with him.
He was, however, finished with letters. He rolled the missive, slipped it into his message cylinder, and sealed it.
And chose to get up and walk the darkened hall to the lighted foyer and security station at the other end of that hall in search of a messenger rather than calling staff to carry it to security. He had no desire to have them disturb Tabini"s evening with it, and he could advise the junior staff to advise Tabini"s staff to that effect. As much as anything, he wanted to see whether the light was showing from under Jase""sdoor, to know whether Jase was asleep or awake, and by that - Well, he didn"t know, entirely, but he wanted to know Jase"s state of mind, whether he was still awake, which might indicate he was still debating matters with himself; and that might indicate he should should try to speak to him. try to speak to him.
He"d looked in that direction, seeing no light. He looked where he was going and found a towering pair of shadows between himself and the distant foyer light, one very broad-shouldered and not not the willowy silhouette of one of his staff. the willowy silhouette of one of his staff.
He spun and ran for his lighted bedroom and slammed his door. And shot the bolt.
And kept himself from standing in front of the door in doing so. He had a gun. He had it in the bureau drawer. He wasn"t supposed to have it. Surely staff had heard the disturbance. If they were alive.
Came a footstep on the carpet outside. A gentle tap.