A special meeting or synod of the clergy was convened by the Rural Dean, to take into consideration among other things, my defection, and to decide what public notice should be taken on the subject of this great scandal. I also attended this meeting, and found my brethren in a very angry and excited state. One after another got up and made grievous charges against me, about the proceedings in my church and parish. The burden of their distress, however, seemed to be noise and excitement.

They said that "There was brawling in my church, and howling in my schoolroom, women fainting and men shouting in a most fanatical manner.

They had not witnessed these scenes themselves, but they were credibly informed of them. Moreover, they a.s.serted, on good authority, that I preached a very different doctrine to that which was authorized by the Church. I had declared that there was no salvation by the Church and Sacraments, but by simple faith in Christ; that any man--it did not matter what his previous life had been--if he only came to my preaching, and did as I told him, would be saved." These, and many other such charges, were made and supported by shouts of "Hear! hear!" and cries of "Shame!" The Rural Dean said he was glad Mr. Haslam was present to answer for himself; he had observed that I had sat very quietly to hear others; and he now hoped that a patient hearing would be given to me.

I rose, and said I was very thankful to be there, and to have this opportunity of testifying before them all that the Lord had converted my soul!

There was a little interruption here, but after a time I was permitted to go on. I said that before I was converted, I was even more zealous than any of them against this change, and greatly prejudiced against it.

I actually flogged a big boy in my school for going to a chapel and professing to be converted; this I did before all the children, and he promised that he would "never be converted any more." I could, therefore, well understand their present feelings, and said that I was not angry with them, but rather prayed that they might, in their turn, be enabled to see these things as I now saw them, and be saved as I was.

Upon this, there arose a great disturbance. The Rural Dean gave me credit for candour, and said he thought I meant well, but that I implied too much against my brethren; however, he had said before, and would repeat it, that I had listened quietly" to what others had said, and that now I was ent.i.tled to a patient hearing a little longer.

But this could not be, for I was stopped at every Fresh statement I made, and had so many questions put to me, that I begged for only one at a time. I was enabled to stand my ground calmly, and endeavoured to answer the charges in order as they were brought out. To all appearances, I had to stand quite alone in that tumultuous party. We had met at twelve o"clock, and after four hours were still in the heat of conflict.

At last, to conclude this extraordinary meeting, one of the Clergy rose and said that he felt it was his painful yet necessary duty to propose that "a vote of censure be pa.s.sed on Mr. Haslam." It was not seconded, and so fell to the ground. Whereupon, another rose ""to record a protest against revival meetings, as contrary to the usage of the Church." This also failed; and as no one else had anything to say, the conclave of divines broke up. What they would have said or done, if I had not attended to be torn to pieces by them, I know not; all I can say is, that they separated without eating me up. Some of them came to me afterwards and seemed pleased that I had stood my ground so good-naturedly, and thought that I had had a great badgering.

The opposition did not stop there--sermons were preached in several of the neighbouring churches, and people earnestly warned against attending certain services, and told not to countenance them by their presence.

The newspapers also took up the matter, and public report was not behind in its usual exaggeration.

I give here an extract from a Letter I thought it necessary to write at this time, on "RELIGIOUS EXCITEMENT":

"My Dear Sir,--I have been seriously considering, for some time, the necessity of making a public statement respecting the work of G.o.d in this place; with a view partly of drawing attention to an all-important, though very neglected subject; and partly with a view of giving some definite and authoritative form to the various and varied reports which are in circulation. It is vain to pretend to know nothing about them, and it is equally vain to suppose that reports about our proceedings are likely to lose less by repet.i.tion, than those on other subjects of less moment.

"I embrace, therefore, the opportunity which your Sermon on RELIGIOUS EXCITEMENT offers, to make a statement.

"I do remonstrate against your publishing to the world a sermon avowedly against "proceedings connected with a neighbouring church;" and that instead of encouragement, counsel, and cooperation in what I know is the work of G.o.d, I receive this public rebuke. I make this remonstrance the more earnestly, because several of the opinions you have expressed, are not, as I believe, consistent with the teaching of our Church; and lastly, I venture to be the remonstrant, because I am the person, and mine the church, which are the objects of your animadversions.

"You hold deservedly a high position among us in respect of rank and esteem for your piety and learning; but at the hazard of incurring the imputation of arrogance, I cannot, I must not, and I will not be unfaithful to the light in which I walk, by the grace of G.o.d; and therefore I do simply and plainly protest, in the first place, against the supposition that Excitement is a means which I am using, or an end I have in view; secondly, against the supposition that conversion is a gradual work, which is to be worked out by Sacraments and Means of Grace; and thirdly, against a teaching which supposes and actually declares that a Person may believe, may be pardoned, may be cleansed from sin, yet not know it."

"In the sense in which you censure Religious Excitement, namely, as a means to "force, as it were, the Spirit of the Lord," and "for the purpose of strongly working on the animal feelings, etc.," it may be justly censurable. Those who make excitement the end and object of their endeavours in a religious movement, must soon find the emptiness of it; they throw dust into their own eyes, and will ever verify your words that "excitement lifts up for a moment and then lets fall again," and that "like dram-drinking, it leaves those that indulge in it weaker than before."

"Those who really are engaged in the work of G.o.d, and especially conversion work, must meet with "excitement." It is impossible for a sinner, under connection of sin, to remain in a calm imperturbable state: or when the despairing sinner comes to a knowledge of that Saviour who made Atonement for him, to help being excited with joy.

n.o.ble or peasant, gentle or uneducated, I am sure there will be excitement, and overflowing joy and gladness.

"A man who never felt himself a lost sinner, and never knew his need of the Saviour, may reason gravely of the impropriety of "excitement," and the man who has never experienced the liberty of deliverance from the "horrible pit, and the mire and clay," may seem to be wise on the subject of Christian joy; but he knows it not. The outburst of joy in the newly born child of G.o.d, is as undiscriminating as the joyous mirth of children. But it becomes more subdued as the child grows on to "the conquering young man," and more chastened still when the "young man"

attains to that state which St. John terms "father." This I have no doubt is the kind of Christian joy you expect to see, and without which you are not satisfied.* But, dear friend, remember the perfect Temple was not built in one, but three days.

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* "I write unto you, little children, because your sins are forgiven you for His name"s sake. I write unto you, fathers, because ye have known Him that is from the beginning. I write unto you, young men, because ye have overcome the Wicked One."--1 John 2:12, 13.

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"We are at foundation work; and you rebuke us for an unfinished temple!

Your rebuke is not undeserved in one sense: we ought to have attained to great advancements, and to have begun long ago; but G.o.d has had patience with us. In this beginning" there seems to be confusion to superficial observers, and there must be "excitement;" but this, as I said, is not the end in view, or the means we use. It is not long since I could reason a against "excitement," and thought as many do now, that in connection With religion it is irreverent, and unbecoming.

"Oh, what a snare is this unfeeling "propriety!" It is really a dislike of being aroused from sleep; a fearful hugging of oneself into apathetic security, and lying down in the arms of the Wicked One for a fatal slumber. Oh that I could "excite" such persons! that I could arouse them! that by any means I could awaken these souls from the sleep of death! I would glory in the censure and rejoice in the blame. Would that I could reach your heart and the hearts of many of my other brethren; that we might unite together and raise a louder call! There should be a more excited blast, as from a trumpet, to stir the ma.s.ses of those who come duly and regularly "to hear us every Sunday," a louder, stronger, and more urgent and thrilling cry, Repent! Repent! We want more fearless plain speaking, more personal appeal. It is not refined to preach of the grave and death, judgment and h.e.l.l,--it is "ranting:" but nevertheless let us "rant;" let us be faithful; let us tell the sinner that he must die; and that he will die in his sins and perish for ever, except he repent and be converted that his sins may be blotted out. Let us tell him that he "is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the Name of the only-begotten Son of G.o.d" (John 3:18): that "the wrath of G.o.d abideth on him" (verse 35). Instead of arguments against "excitement," let us have a united cry against sin and frivolity wherever it is. There is excitement against "excitement" now; let there be excitement, if you will, against indifference, and neglect of religion."

Many of the proceedings in our parish were, I confess, more tumultuous than I could justify, more noisy and exciting than I thought needful; but I could not control the people. If they had been educated to ideas of propriety and self-control, the impulse of Divine power, which really then filled them, might have found expression in a more quiet and orderly manner. To hinder their rejoicings therefore, though they were considered so obnoxious, would have been to withstand the Spirit of G.o.d.

As the people had not been taught better, I could not interfere with them; I would rather bear the obloquy of men.

For instance, one day, by way of change, I had a meeting for the Bible Society, and invited some of the clergy who sympathized with its object.

They attended, and others came out of curiosity "to see these revival people." We had a large gathering, and everything began smoothly. "My Scripture-reader, who was naturally a most excitable and noisy man, tried to do his best before the clergy; he spoke of the sweet words which they had heard from the reverend speakers; it was charming, he said, to hear of a good cause supported in such "mellifluous accents,"

and so forth. He got a little wild towards the end, but on the whole he was to be praised for his kind efforts to give a quiet tone to the meeting". By this time, our friend "Billy Bray" had appeared on the scene, and gave us chapter and verse from one end of the Bible to the other, on the subject of "dancing for joy." He propounded his theory, that if a man did not praise G.o.d, he would not rise in the resurrection; if he only praised G.o.d with his mouth, he would rise like those things carved on the tombstones, with swelling cheeks and wings; if he clapped his hands (suiting his actions to the words) he would have a pair of hands as well at the resurrection; and if he danced with his feet, he would rise complete. He hoped to rise like that, to sing, to clap his hands, dance, and jump too. The worst of jumping in this world, he said, was that he had to come down again, but even in heaven he supposed the higher he danced and jumped, the higher he would be; walking in heaven, to his mind, was praising G.o.d, one foot said "Glory," and the other "Hallelujah."

Under Billy"s original theories the people were warming up, and becoming a little responsive, and "Billy" himself was getting excited. In reference to some remarks which had been made by a previous speaker about Samson, he said that he felt as happy and strong as Samson; then suddenly he put his arms round me, as I was standing gesticulating and making signs to the people to be still, and taking me up as he had done once before, he carried me down the schoolroom, crying out, "Here go the postes! Glory! hallelujah!" It was useless to resist, for he held me with an iron grasp; so I remained still, hoping at every step that he would put me down. I suppose he imagined himself to be Samson carrying off the gates of Gaza. "The people got what they called "happy," and shouted and praised G.o.d most vociferously. I gave out a hymn, but the joy of the Cornish people could not be restrained within the bounds of a tune, or form of words. Some of them became very excited and unmanageable; only those who have witnessed such scenes can understand what I mean. The power of G.o.d was great, though the demonstrations were very human. My visitors trembled with fear, and made their escape as precipitately as they possibly could. To those who are not in the power of the Spirit such rejoicings are unintelligible; lookers-on are stumbled or offended because they only see and feel the human manifestation, and not the Divine power; they are like people who get all the smoke, and none of the warmth of the fire.

I made up my mind for the worst, for we had a reporter there, and some others who were only too ready to make the most of such a scene.

Nevertheless I would rather have the same thing over and over again, than have the most stately and orderly ceremonials conjoined with spiritual death. These things, with all their proprieties, are very chilling to living souls, and all the more hurtful because dead souls are satisfied by them instead of being disturbed.

Dear Mr. Aitken was very angry with us, when he heard the things which were reported; and, like a good spiritual father, he came over to teach us better. He preached one of his own strong sermons, on the difference between emotion and principle, and after beating us down very hard, his dear heart relented, and he tried to cheer and lift us up. This last is always an easy thing to do in Cornwall. The people soon responded to his efforts, and began to praise G.o.d; and then he took fire, and praised too. Mutually exciting and being excited, his powerful voice could be heard above the din of hundreds of shouting voices. The dear man was happy in his soul, and so was I, and we did not care a halfpenny for the outside world, newspapers, or anything else.

We had obloquy with opposition; and even to my personal friends I could not give satisfactory explanations of these things. One suggested that I should read a paper at the next Clerical Meeting, and give a statement in exposition of my views and practices. This I consented to do, and Mr.

Aitken kindly helped me to write it. On the appointed day I undertook to read it, on condition that no one interrupted me till I had finished. It was a hard task for them to sit still, but they managed to do so; and at the end, burst out upon me in a volley of censure and disapprobation. I was obliged to tell them that they were not converted, and therefore could not understand these things.

I wrote a pamphlet to show that the Church of England"s teaching was based on conversion, and not on baptism; and that the Reformation was to the Church of England what Conversion was to the individual reformers.

Taking my own change as an ill.u.s.tration, I said, that I used to rest on Baptism and the Church, and that now I was standing on the Rock, Christ Jesus. Once I worked for life, and now I worked from life; that is, because I possessed it. I declared that this was the characteristic difference between the Church of England as it is, and as it was when connected with the Church of Rome. This pamphlet would not satisfy them.

I then wrote and published a letter to the Archdeacon, in which, in my young zeal, I charged the clergy with being unconverted, and doing the devil"s work of hindering the salvation of souls, and that they seemed to stand on their parish boundaries and say, "This is my parish, and you shall not come here to disturb the sleep of death which now reigns."

This poured no oil upon the waters.

I then wrote another pamphlet upon which I spent much time, thought, and prayer. I took the ma.n.u.script and read it to Mr. Aitken. He walked up and down in his large room, while I was reading, and e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.ed, as only he could, "Bless G.o.d! Glory be to G.o.d!" When I finished, I said, "Shall I print it?"

He said, "It is worth printing, but it will do no good. It is like a little doggie barking at a dead elephant. We shall never convert the.

Church as a body: we must try and get at individuals. I am quite convinced we shall not succeed unless we work in this, way."

CHAPTER 17

Individual Cases, 1853.

An Archbishop of Canterbury, in old times, contrasted public preaching with personal dealing in this way: When we preach, it is like dashing water from a bucket upon so many vessels which are arranged before us-some drops fall into one, and some into another, while others remain empty; but when we speak to individuals, it is like pouring water into the neck of a vessel.

I gave up writing and printing pamphlets, and went on as quietly as I could with my own work, looking out for individual cases as they presented themselves in the providence of G.o.d. In this way, without fermenting controversy or keeping up public excitement, I was able more effectually to impart my meaning, than by printed statements, which I found were misunderstood or distorted; and what is more, I was able to apply the truth with an individual "Have you?" It would take more s.p.a.ce than I can afford to tell of the souls which were gained in this way. I will give here only a few instances, which are interesting, and which will sustain the thread of my narrative. The first was in the case of one who began an argument on Baptismal Grace. I asked him what it was.

"I know what converting or saving" grace is; but what is this?" He did not say more, than that in Baptism he was made a member of Christ, a child of G.o.d, and an inheritor of the kingdom of heaven.

"But," I asked, "suppose you have not repented and believed, what then?"

Receiving no answer, I continued, "Then, nothing; but the responsibility and the name."

A few days afterwards he came to me, saying that I had made him quite miserable, and asked me whether I meant to deny the necessity of baptism. I said, "Certainly not, but the condition of faith and repentance must be fulfilled. Whatever Baptismal Regeneration may be, Spiritual Regeneration is the work of the Spirit in those who believe in Christ Jesus." After a long talk and prayer, he appeared to understand that a conscious change should be wrought in him, and a spiritual faculty imparted, by which he could "see the kingdom of G.o.d." He remained for the evening service and meeting in the schoolroom and was much impressed with what he witnessed. Instead of going away, he stayed with me till after midnight, when he found peace with G.o.d (as he said) in the church where we had been praying. Then he ordered his horse and rode home; but before he set out, he exacted a promise from me that I would not mention his conversion to any one. I consented to this, on the condition that he announce the change which had been wrought in him, from his pulpit on the following Sunday.

A few days afterwards my friend came to me in a great rage, and charged me with announcing his conversion all over the town. I told him that I was not sure enough of it myself to say anything about it, and that I had not spoken to a single person on the subject. Still he seemed to doubt me, for he said his brother had been with him, and had told him that it was known all over the town that he had been to Baldhu, and that he was converted. Upon inquiry, I found out that my servant, who sat up till after mid-night to get his horse, had overheard our conversation, and was the offending party.

I am always afraid of persons who are ashamed to acknowledge their conversion. My friend, I am sorry to say, made no announcement, but went on preaching as if he had always been the same, and consequently never came out to be of any use or help in the work. His testimony was indistinct also, and without any power. He became a very popular preacher afterwards, which was his great ambition, for he cared more for a large congregation than for Wining Souls.

Soon after this, I fell across another of my old friends in the street.

He tried to avoid me, but I went up and shook hands with him. At first he would not look at me, and said he was afraid of me because I had changed my views. I a.s.sured him that I had not changed anything, but that I had myself been changed. As he was listening, I went on to tell him that I had long tried to make myself good enough for G.o.d"s acceptance, but finding that Christ would not receive reformed characters, I came to Him as a poor lost sinner, and He saved me. Seeing that he continued attentive, I was proceeding to make my meaning plainer, when he turned round, and looking sternly at me, said, "If I understand you, I am to cry for mercy as "a common sinner.""

"Yes," I replied, being very pleased to find that he had understood me so well.

"Then." he said, "I will do no such thing." With this, he turned away and departed. When he saw that I was following him, he said, "I desire you will not speak to me any more. I do not agree with you."

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