He groaned low down, then informed, "I"m chasing the mayor."
"What is that?"
"Number one. The big boss. The sheriff, pohanko, or whatever you call him."
"I"m no wiser," she said, genuinely puzzled.
"The man who runs this town. The leading citizen."
"Make it a little clearer," she suggested, trying hard to help him. "Who or what should this citizen be
leading?""You and Seth and everyone else." He waved a hand to encompa.s.s the entire burg.Frowning, she said, "Leading us where?""Wherever you"re going."
She gave up, beaten, and signed the white-coated waiter to come to her a.s.sistance.
"Matt, are we going any place?"
"How should I know?"
"Well, ask Seth then."
He went away, came back with, "Seth says he"s going home at six o"clock and what"s it to you?"
"Anyone leading him there?" she inquired.
"Don"t be daft," Matt advised. "He knows his own way and he"s cold sober."
Harrison chipped in with, "Look, I don"t see why there should be so much difficulty about this. Just tell me where I can find an official, any official-the police chief, the city treasurer, the mortuary keeper or even a mere justice of the peace."
"What"s an official?" asked Matt, openly puzzled.
"What"s a justice of the peace?" added the brunette.
His mind side-slipped and did a couple of spins. It took him quite a while to rea.s.semble his thoughts and try another tack.
"Supposing," he said to Matt, "this joint catches fire. What would you do?"
"Fan it to keep it going," responded Matt, fed up and making no effort to conceal the fact. He returned to the counter with the air of one who has no time to waste on half-wits.
"He"d put it out," informed the brunette. "What else would you expect him to do?"
"Supposing he couldn"t?"
"He"d call in others to help him."
"And would they?"
"Of course," she a.s.sured, surveying him with pity. "They"d jump at the chance. They"d be planting a nice crop of strong obs, wouldn"t they?"
"Yes, I guess so." He began to feel stalled, but made a last shot at the problem. "What if the fire were too big and fast for pa.s.sers-by to tackle?"
"Seth would summon the fire squad."
Defeat receded. A touch of triumph replaced it.
"Ah, so there is a fire squad! That"s what I meant by something official. That"s what I"ve been after all along. Quick, tell me where I can find the depot."
"Bottom end of Twelfth. You can"t miss it."
"Thanks." He got up in a hurry. "See you again sometime." Going out fast, he grabbed his bicycle, shoved off from the curb. * * *
The fire depot was a big place holding four telescopic ladders, a spray tower and two multiple pumps, all motorized on the usual array of fat rubber b.a.l.l.s. Inside, Harrison came face to face with a small man wearing immense plus fours.
"Looking for someone?" asked the small man.
"The fire chief," said Harrison.
"Who"s he?"
By this time prepared for that sort of thing, Harrison spoke as one would to a child. "See here, mister, this is a fire-fighting outfit. Somebody bosses it. Somebody organizes the shebang, fills forms, presses b.u.t.tons, recommends promotions, kicks the shiftless, takes all the credit, transfers all the blame and generally lords it around. He"s the most important guy in the bunch and everybody knows it." His forefinger tapped the other"s chest. "And he"s the fella I"m going to talk to if it"s the last thing I do."
"n.o.body"s any more important than anyone else. How can they be? I think you"re crazy."
"You"re welcome to think what you like, but I"m telling you that-"
A shrill bell clamored, cutting off the sentence. Twenty men appeared as if by magic, boarded a ladder
and a multi-pump, roared into the street.
Squat, basin-shaped helmets were the crews" only item of common attire. Apart from these, they plumbed the depths of sartorial iniquity. The man with the plus fours, who had gained the pump in one bold leap, was whirled out standing between a fat firefighter wearing a rainbow-hued c.u.mmerbund and a thin one sporting a canary yellow kilt. A latecomer decorated with earrings shaped like little bells hotly
pursued the pump, s.n.a.t.c.hed at its tailboard, missed, disconsolately watched the outfit disappear from sight. He walked back, swinging his helmet in one hand.
"Just my lousy luck," he informed the gaping Harrison. "The sweetest call of the year. A big brewery.
The sooner they get there the bigger the obs they"ll plant on it." He licked his lips at the thought, sat on a coil of canvas hose. "Oh, well, maybe it"s all for the good of my health."
"Tell me something," Harrison insisted. "How do you get a living?"
"There"s a h.e.l.l of a question. You can see for yourself. I"m on the fire squad."
"I know. What I mean is, who pays you?"
"Pays me?"
"Gives you money for all this."
"You talk kind of peculiar. What is money?"
Harrison rubbed his cranium to a.s.sist the circulation of blood through the brain. What is money?
Yeouw. He tried another angle.
"Supposing your wife needs a new coat, how does she get it?"
"Goes to a store saddled with fire-obs, of course. She kills one or two for them."
"But what if no clothing store has had a fire?"
"You"re pretty ignorant, brother. Where in this world do you come from?" His ear bells swung as he
studied the other a moment, then went on, "Almost all stores have fire-obs. If they"ve any sense, they allocate so many per month by way of insurance. They look ahead, just in case, see? They plant obs on us, in a way, so that when we rush to the rescue we"ve got to kill off a dollop of theirs before we can plant any new ones of our own. That stops us overdoing it and making hogs of ourselves. Sort of cuts down the stores" liabilities. It makes sense, doesn"t it?"
"Maybe, but-"
"I get it now," interrupted the other, narrowing his eyes. "You"re from that s.p.a.ceship. You"re an Antigand."
"I"m a Terran," said Harrison with suitable dignity. "What"s more, all the folk who originally settled this
planet were Terrans."
"You trying to teach me history?" He gave a harsh laugh. "You"re wrong. There was a five per cent strain of Martian."
"Even the Martians are descended from Terran settlers," riposted Harrison.
"So what? That was a devil of a long time back. Things change, in case you haven"t heard. We"ve no
Terrans or Martians on this world-except for your crowd which has come in unasked. We"re all Gands here. And you nosey pokes are Antigands."
"We aren"t anti-anything that I know of. Where did you get that idea?"
"Myob!" said the other, suddenly determined to refuse further agreement. He tossed his helmet to one
side, spat on the floor.
"Huh?"
"You heard me. Go trundle your scooter."
Harrison gave up and did just that, he pedaled gloomily back to the ship.
* * * His Excellency pinned him with an authoritative optic. "So you"re back at last, mister. How many are coming and at what time?"
"None, sir," said Harrison, feeling kind of feeble.
"None?" August eyebrows rose up. "Do you mean that they have refused my invitation?"
"No, sir."
The amba.s.sador waited a moment, then said, "Come out with it, mister. Don"t stand there gawping as if
your push-and-puff contraption has just given birth to a roller skate. You say they haven"t refused my invitation-but n.o.body is coming. What am I to make of that?"
"I didn"t ask anyone."
"So you didn"t ask!" Turning, he said to Grayder, Shelton and the others, "He didn"t ask!" His attention came back to Harrison. "You forgot all about it, I presume? Intoxicated by liberty and the power of man over machine, you flashed around the town at nothing less than eighteen miles per hour, creating consternation among the citizenry, tossing their traffic laws into the ash can, putting persons in peril of their lives, not even troubling to ring your bell or-"
"I haven"t got a bell, sir," denied Harrison, inwardly resenting this list of enormities. "I have a whistle
operated by rotation of the rear wheel.""There!" said the amba.s.sador, like one abandoning all hope. He sat down, smacked his forehead several times. "Somebody"s going to get a bubble-pipe." He pointed a tragic finger. "And he"s got a whistle."