His eyes narrowed to ice blue chips. The brandy traced a path over onenipple and afro wed to her stomach. His gaze followed the trail ittook, observing the widening of its path as the thin material soaked upthe liquid.
He didn"t make a move to get her a towel~ to dry herself. He was out of helpfulness for the night. Raine wiped away tears from the cornerof her eyes. The brandy had taken a burning wrong turn down herwindpipe, and it didn"t look as if she"d have to worry about drinkingthe rest of it--she was wearing it instead. She crossed over to Mac and took a dishtowel out of the drawer. She dabbed at the wetness with embarra.s.sment. She was a total washout as a femme fatale. Instead of giving her courage, the brandy had loosened her muscles to the point ofclumsiness. She raised her eyes to meet his gaze, and her movementsgradually stilled. Macauley"s face was taut and wild, and he waswatching every move she made with the intent look of a bird of prey.And then he looked in her eyes, and the towel fell, forgotten, from herhand. Desire. She knew intuitively what she saw in those glitteringblue eyes, and the recognition fanned her own. It wasn"t an emotion" she"d had much familiarity with in the past. But it was impossible tomistake.
She"d learned all she knew about the feeling from him. She reached out a shaky hand to touch him and, if possible, he went even stiller. She traced the strong breastbone that delineated his torso. One thumb brushed gently across the taut nub on his chest, and he hissed; Thesound caused her eyelids to droop, and her hand slid lower. He caught it in his own. " Time to get you to bed," he said, his voice a hoa.r.s.e rasp.
She knew there was no sensual hidden meaning in his words, and shecould have wept.
She was inexperienced, but enough of a woman to know that he wantedher. And enough of a realist to know he wasn"t going to allow himselfto act on his desire. She preceded him out of the kitchen. He went through the routine of the last few weeks. He locked the back door and flicked the light off behind her. Checking the door to the garage, heefficiently moved to the front, locked it and set the alarm. He caughtup with her where she"d hesitated at the stairs, and unthinkinglyreached by her to flip off the lights. He heard her gasp and knewimmediately what he"d done. He"d witnessed her careful progressthrough the house enough times. Before turning off the light for theroom in back of her, Raine always flipped on the one ahead. One hand reversed his careless act, but not before her body had slammed againsthis, her fingers grasping at the waistband of his jeans. He knew, withhis head, that he"d startled her with the abrupt descension ofdarkness. He never would have been so careless if his mind hadn"t been shattered in a million different pieces from watching her a few minutes ago. But even knowing that her need for him stemmed from her fearcouldn"t dim the tidal wave of arousal that finally burst forth. His hand dropped of its own accord and traveled quickly to fasten on herwaist. He pulled her even closer, lowered his mouth and found hers.The simmering desire he"d been fighting boiled out of control, andreason receded. Her lips were sweet with the remnants of the brandy,and without thought he pressed them open ~ and swept the taste of theliquor from her mouth with his tongue. He couldn"t blame the brandyfor the speed with which her taste went to his head. Her hands, whichhad had such a death grip on the waistband of his pants, moved upwardto clasp around his waist. ;~ Without releasing her lips, he slippedhis arm below her b.u.t.tocks and lifted her up a step, so she was closerto his own height. He angled his mouth for a closer fit, and thedemand it made was implicit. His tongue skated over hers and thenreturned to claim it. Her knees grew weak, and Raine"s arms climbed totwine around his neck, one hand entangling in the longer hair at his nape. The speed with which his dam of desire had burst dizzied her.But its," strength erased the single moment of panic she"d had ingness, and it was forgotten in the surging pleasure of his touch.
The moisture on the front of Raine"s nightgown dampened his skin, andMac broke the kiss as he remembered how the wetness had occurred.
Panting, he drew the material of the shift tightly across her breastand lowered his mouth, finding the spot where she"d spilled. He sucked strongly, a little roughly, the brandy on the material coating histongue as he lashed the pebbled hardness of her nipple beneath. A broken cry came from her, and she twisted against his mouth. This was what she"d wanted, his control broken, his reason gone. For a moment,earlier, she"d been almost frightened by the thought of unleashing hispa.s.sion. But now she couldn"t get 6enough of it. She"d never expectedthat she could inspire such emotion in a man, nor that she"d want to.But Macauley"s loss of control sent shivers of exhilaration shootingthrough her veins. The narrow straps of her shift were lowered downher slim arms, and Mac raised his head. The fabric was wet from his mouth over her breast, and he observed the pouting nipple thrustingagainst it. Then he pulled the material down to her wrists and turnedher so her back was against the railing. He went down on one knee in front of her and drew his chest across her b.r.e.a.s.t.s. Sparks flew insideher at the rasp of his hair-roughened torso dragging against hersensitized nipples. Her breath caught at the exquisite sensation, sopleasurable it bordered on pain. And then she felt herself being heldcloser, her shoulders arching over the railing as wet heat enclosed hernipple. The suction of his mouth caused a corresponding weakness inher limbs. Mac raised his head slightly and looked down at her withslitted eyes. Her pretty b.r.e.a.s.t.s were shapely, almost conical, herpink nipples drawn to firm points. His hand replaced his mouth on thebreast he"d abandoned, ma.s.saging it as his other hand plumped its twinfor his lips. His lips tugged at her, and the searing heat wa.s.suddenly too much Raine. She twisted in his arms. The shift had slid down to her wrists, and suddenly she couldn"t bear to have her handsconfined. She wanted them free, like his. She wanted the pleasure ofskating them over his skin, finding the places that made him moan. Whenhe raised his head again she wiggled from the narrow straps, her handsgliding up his chest. He watched as the silky fabric caught on hernarrow hips, draping enticingly. He curled his fingers into thematerial and gave it a little tug, sending it to pool at her feet. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly, fighting for control. She wore only asc.r.a.p of midnight blue panties, more lace than fabric, which hintedenticingly at the mysterious shadow beneath them. The blood in his groin pounded demandingly. He cupped her mound in one large palm andpressed once, then again. She gasped and twisted against his hand.
The other slipped behind her and palmed one lace-clad b.u.t.tock,squeezing gently. Raine opened her mouth against his chest, draggingthe tip of her tongue across one taut male nub, wanting to bring him ameasure of the torment he was subjecting her to. Her hands stroked his chest, kneading his muscles, before dropping to his waist. When one delicate finger drew a pattern in the whorl of hair above his navel,Mac drew in his breath sharply.
He found the taut bundle of nerves between her legs, and his thumbtapped against it, eyes glinting with satisfaction when she buckedagainst him. He repeated the motion over and over. Raine"s hands clenched for an instant at his waistband, then with shaky fingers shereleased the b.u.t.ton of his jeans.
She lingered on the hard long length pressed tightly against the fly,fingers rubbing gently up and down. His mouth came down on hers fiercely, and she lowered the zipper. His breath hissed against herlips when he felt her small hands reach inside the jeans to hold him.His. control shredded when, an instant later, the jeans were pushedimpatiently off his hips and she was cradling all of him between herhands. With a primitive, unconscious movement he pushed heavily intoher touch. He reached a hand dow~ to close over hers, teaching her themotion, groaning when she mimicked the action perfectly. She couldn"t get enough of him. Her wandering fingers traced his length, thenreturned to squeeze gently. Then her breath was lost as her pantieswere drawn down her legs. " Step out of them," he rasped, and sheobeyed mindlessly. He insinuated a knee between her legs, parting herfor the return of his hand. This time he let his fingers slide throughthe delicate folds until he found the slick, damp heat of her. He eased a finger inside her and watched her go wild in his arms. She moaned and her inner muscles clenched. He used his knee to widen her stance, and his other arm snaked around her back, pulling her closer.He took her mouth in a deep, wild kiss, at the same time probing moredeeply with his finger. His thumb rubbed rhythmically in accompanimentto his finger, and she whimpered into his mouth at the dual a.s.sault.
He wanted her hot, writhing, ready for him. He wanted to wipe outanything that had come before this moment and leave only a lasting,searing memory of the two of them. But she was wet silk against hishand, and the feel of her straining against him, the sound of thelittle whimpers she was making torched his own control. He wanted her now--here and right now. He didn"t want to wait, couldn"t take a fewprecious moments to move her to a bed. He pushed his jeans and briefsoff and kicked them away. Reaching for her again, he lifted her upwith one arm beneath her b.u.t.tocks. He turned her away from the railingand pressed her back against the wall. He was between her legs, thetip of his shaft just nudging her tight entrance, when a modic.u.m ofreason skated across his mind. Not only had he surrendered his lastremaining vow to do ~what was best, what was right for Raine. He wasn"t taking enough . care with her, not being gentle enough. He didn"t want to bring back traumatic memories.
Squeezing his eyes tightly together, he threw back his head andclenched his teeth. His body was heaving, his muscles trembling as hefought the pa.s.sion-induced haze. She sensed the precise moment he hadsecond thoughts.
Her eyes flew open, and the sight of his big body trembling with effortagainst hers almost snapped her last link to sanity. " No, Macau-ley,"she whispered fiercely, achingly. She didn"t want his thought, or hisgentleness. She wanted him the way he"d taken her the first time,sensual longing without thinking. She"d accept nothing less from him now. She moved slightly, and the blunt tip of his s.e.x probed her. His forehead fell to lay against hers. His chest heaved as he drew in great breaths of air. " Now,"
she panted. " Right now.
Like this.
" There had been an instant, just an instant, when he actuallybelieved he"d be able to pull away, to do the decent thing and leaveher. But her words managed to convince him as nothing else could. She moved experimentally against him, and he groaned. He pulled her legsaround his hips, bracing her bottom with one arm. Then he let reasonlfade as he obeyed his screaming impulses and surged stronglyinto her. Her teeth closed on his shoulder, but he didn"t feel thesting of pain. Sweating and shaking, he held still in her and slippedone hand between their bodies. Finding her sensitized nub again, hepleasured her with his fingers until she was moaning and writhing,moving wildly on him. Only when he could feel how close she was tocompletion did he let his body take over.
His next thrust was deeper, and Raine cried out brokenly. He caughtthe sound in his mouth and surged into her again. Reflexively shetightened her legs around his waist and clung to his wide shoulders.Her muscles were coiled so tightly, she felt as though she"d explode.She moved against him frantically, accepting his thrusts and searchingunconsciously for something just out of reach. His hips slammedagainst hers again, and suddenly her senses exploded. Waves of ecstasytransported her to a place she"d only experienced with him. Feelingher delicate convulsions around him was all it took to shatter Mac"s control.
With one more wild, deep thrust, he crested, and reality faded away.
Chapter C.
heir breathing slowed after long minutes, When Mac finally raised hishead from Raine"s shoulder, she was almost afraid to open her eyes.Only now did she remember the regret that had stamped his face afterthe first time he"d made love to her. She wasn"t sure she could tolerate it again.
She forced herself to open her eyes, steeling herself against whatshe"d find in his. He stared at her and reached up a hand to brush thehair from her forehead. The tenderness of the motion almost made her weep. Brushing a kiss across the skin he"d just bared, he began towithdraw from her body.
She gasped a little at the feeling of desolation that swept her at theseparation. As if reading her mind, he didn"t back away as he loweredher body down his. Instead he scooped her up, and regardless of theclothes strewn behind them, walked deliberately up the stairs. He didn"t stop until he"d reached her room. Then he knelt on the bed and laid her carefully down.
She didn"t let go of his shoulders. She wasn"t going to let him leaveher without saying a thing. He was going to have to speak the words,although if he apologized to her this time, she knew she would breakdown. He studied her face in the dim light that spilled into the roomfrom the hallway. After several long moments he spoke. " I"m not sure this is what you needed tonight, Raine.
" His voice was low.
She scooted up to a sitting position. One hand went to his jaw. It was so rare to see him completely clean-shaven that she gave into anurge she"d had all evening and ran the back of her hand along his cheeklingeringly. Looking straight into his eyes, she murmured, " I neededyou, tonight, Macauley.
Only you.
" He closed his eyes tightly for a moment. An emotion washed over him that he couldn"t identify, didn"t dare identify. She"d needed him. He knew she wasn"t talking about protection from the person threateningher. She meant him, Mac O"Neill. He"d never been needed like that before, wanted for himself only, and the feeling was gut-wrenchinglyalluring. It was also quite possibly the most frightening thing he"dever had to face. " I"ll be right back," he muttered and pushed offthe bed. Raine let out a shaky breath. She"d just taken a huge risk,and he"d almost run from her room.
But not before she"d witnessed the effect her words had on him. Theyhad meant something to him, she was certain of that. She just wasn"tcertain what. She"d faced many of her own fears over the last few years. But learning to let another person walk up behind her andfacing her fear of the dark hadn"t left her nearly as vulnerable aslaying her heart out to this man. He wasn"t comfortable with emotion,not from others, and most certainly not from himself. She didn"t know why she"d expected any different reaction from him. Or why she let ithurt so much. He entered the room again, a wet cloth in his hand.Seating himself on the side of the bed, he bent over her and slowly,carefully drew the cloth between her thighs. They clenched reflexivelyat the intimate gesture. It was ridiculous to feel embarra.s.sed after what they"d shared, but she couldn"t control ~the feeling. She looked into his face. His expression was a little grim, but determined.Slowly she relaxed and he completed the task, his face a mask ofintense concentration.
When he"d finished and pulled away, she forced herself to remainsilent. She wasn"t going to beg him to stay with her; she wouldn"tallow herself to.
Raine wasn"t sure she would be able to stop once she started pleading.His back was turned toward her as he sat on the edge of the bed, andshe could see the muscles play across the broad expanse. He looked like a man fighting a war with himself, and her heart ached painfullyfor him. Then his muscles un tensed He turned deliberately and laybeside her, drawing her close to him. With one hand he pulled th.e.s.h.eet over the two of them.
Then he arranged her against him, pressing her face to the hollow ofhis shoulder and anchoring her to him with one strong leg across bothof hers.
His arm wrapped across her waist. Recognizing the inner struggle thathad taken place, she realized what this decision had cost him. Her heart squeezed with joy as she snuggled into his embrace. One lone tear trickled from the corner of her eye. " Macauley," she whisperedachingly. A feather-light kiss brushed against her hair. " Sleep,baby," he ordered huskily. " I"ll stay.
Just sleep.
" Her breathing gradually slowing, her body relaxed against his. Mac fought slumber as he held her. The feel of her in his arms, soft andtrusting, was too sweet not to savon He stared into the blanket ofdarkness, waiting for the guilt to begin, for the regret to take over.Reason had a way of seeping insidiously back into a mind that had onlymoments ago been lost to pa.s.sion.
But the guilt, though hovering at a distance, for once stayed at bay.This had felt too d.a.m.n right, too inevitable to regret. His mind was racing in furious circles, trying to reconcile what he knew was rightwith taking what he wanted. Because all he wanted was the woman cradled in his arms right now. Raine came awake to the delicious aroma of coffee. Her vision was the last of her senses to become alert. Slowly she managed to open her eyes.
Macauley was sitting next to her on the side of the bed, waving a mugof coffee under her nose. Her eyes dropped again, a smile creepingacross her lips. The happiness that filled her was idiotic, andimpossible to suppress.
" I"ve said it before," she murmured lazily. " You"re a handy guy tohave around.
" " Always glad to be of service, ma"am," he drawled. One of her eyespopped open and then the other. She studied him suspiciously. His face was impa.s.sive. There was no way of guessing if the doubleentendre had been intentional or not. She sighed and rubbed her eyes.Sitting up in bed, she rested against the headboard and reached out forthe mug he was offering her.
" Mmm," she said appreciatively, after she"d taken a sip. " Thank you.
But where"s yours?
" " I"ve already had half a pot," he answered dryly.
He was wearing a pair of jeans and nothing else, but she could tellthat he"d been up for a while. His hair was still damp, and curlingslightly in back.
And he had obviously had a recent shave. She reached out and ran a finger along his chin. " Twice in twenty-four hours," she saidteasingly. " What"s the occasion, O"Neill?
" " If it calls for that kind of reaction," he muttered, " I need toshave more often.
" " Not on my account," she a.s.sured him. " I"ve developed a realappreciation for that slightly sinister look you affect.
" His look wasn"t amused, but she smiled anyway. " What have you beendoing since you"ve been up?
" she asked. " I mean, besides drinking gallons of coffee and pruningthat beard of yours?
" He c.o.c.ked an eyebrow. " Sa.s.sy this morning, aren"t you?
" She stretched, not quite innocently, and her leg beneath the sheetglided over to touch his hip. " Yep.
What are you going to do about it?
" He felt a jolt of electricity from her touch, even through the bed covers.
He wasn"t going to consider answering that question. What he would like to do about it didn"t bear thinking of, much less discussing.Having a conversation of any kind in her bedroom this morning probablyhadn"t been a real wise move. His mouth twisted. Wise moves hadn"t exactly been his forte lately. He moved off the bed. " I thought," hesaid, his voice slightly hoa.r.s.e, " you might want to get away for alittle while today.
Unless you need to work, of course.
" She studied him in surprise. That suggestion was almost the last shewould have expected from him. Wakingup to find him there with coffeehad allayed her fear that he was going to withdraw completely, as hehad the last time they"d made love. The fact that he wasn"t had fragile hope blooming inside her. " I think I can spare a few hours,"she finally responded. " Just don"t tell Andr~ I"m loafing, though.
" " He won"t hear it from me," Mac promised dryly. " Actually, I"malmost done with my last piece.
Just a few more hours will do it.
So I"m okay on time.
" " Good.
" His voice was filled with satisfaction. " Then get cleaned up anddress for swimming.
" " We"re going to the beach?
" Her amazement grew.
"That," he said, as he moved toward the door, " is exactly where we"re
going.
We"ll have to stop on the way and pick up some lunch.
How fast can you get ready?
" " A half hour.
" He stopped in the doorway and issued her a disbelieving look. "
There isn"t a woman on earth who can move that fast, honey.
The truck leaves in an hour.
Better get your tush out of bed if you want to be in it.
" Mac ducked out of the room while she was still sputtering. "
Chauvinist!
" she called after him. She could picture the c.o.c.ky grin on his faceas his answer floated back. " Fifty-nine minutes and counting." Muttering to herself, Raine flung back the covers and put on her robe. She"d make him eat those words by getting ready in half the time he"dgiven her. But to do so, she was really going to have to fly.Twenty-five minutes later she pulled a coverup over her swimsuit andslipped into a pair of sandals. As she picked up the beach bag she"dpacked, she heard a male voice call her name from downstairs. " I"m coming," she shouted. Running down the stairs, she scolded, " That wasn"t even a half hour, you"re not as patient as you"-- She stopped inher tracks as Greg ambled out of the den. " Raine." His earnest brown eyes were worried. " What in heaven"s name happened here?
Your porch is a charred mess.
" " I know," she replied, biting her lip. The night she"d spent in
Mac"s arms had successfully driven the trauma of the fire from hermind, at least for a while. " Someone drove out here last night andleft several bottle bombs as calling cards.
But I"m all right," she hastened to add, stemming his next question. " Mac I meanY she stammered, "the police and the fire department came.There wasn"t too much damage done."
"This is horrible!"
he exclaimed, pushing his gla.s.ses up the bridge of his nose.
"My G.o.d, Raine, you could have been killed!"
"Things could have gotten serious,"
she admitted.
"I was fortunate that help arrived in time to keep the fire from
spreading to the house. I really believe that some of the, urn, security measures we"ve taken around here scared them off."
She supposed at the beginning Macauley"s presence in her life could be
loosely defined as a security measure, she mentally excused herself.
"Did you bring something out that needed my signature?"
she asked quickly, nodding toward the file folder in his hand.