Publishedat 1st of July 2019 09:44:44 PMChapter 31.1
I hung up . My throat felt dry, so I reached over for a cup of water . But I discovered that my whole body was shaking, from my shoulders all the way down to my fingertips . The tremors seemed to come from the palpitations in my heart . Shallow ripples formed in the cup, pulsating with the same rhythm as my heart .
I became afraid .
I even started to have misgivings about shooting the film . I had grown too close to her, too close for comfort . I didn’t want to understand Yin Xuan any better . I felt like it was too dangerous .
Because of our outstanding collaboration, the director had specially added some scenes where the sisters went head on . Yin Xuan and my face-to-face meetings only grew in number .
From her face, I couldn’t find any trace of yesterday’s emotional breakdown . Yin Li looked on quietly like always . His face was rarely this calm . It seemed like he really didn’t know . It even got to the point that during a rest break, he un.o.btrusively walked near me as he went to get a cup of coffee .
“You dance better than Xuan Xuan . ” Then he suddenly seemed at a loss for words . After a moment, he finally continued . “I’m very happy . ”
I watched his departing figure . After that interaction, I was absent-minded for the whole scene .
Sometimes, I really hoped that time would slow down .
But the movie shooting still slowly came to a conclusion . Yin Xuan’s dedication to her role seemed to have lit a fire under the cast and crew . “Only I Dance” wrapped up shooting ahead of schedule .
“Then let’s go out to eat!” The director was clearly overjoyed . “It just so happens that Director Huang’s crew also wrapped up shooting today . Let’s celebrate with both teams . I’ll pay!”
“Mr . Yin, I’m really happy that I was able to work with Ms . Yin this time . It’s really hard to find someone as dedicated as her, even among professional actors . Since you’re our financial sponsor and supported us each step of the way, you can’t be missing from our celebration . Come along!”
Yin Li smiled and nodded .
All of the cast and crew were br.i.m.m.i.n.g with happiness . Very quickly, the other team that the director spoke of joined us and was swept up in our joy .
Their team seemed to be shooting an idol drama that would debut next summer . Though it wouldn’t air until far in the future, there still was a lot of talk about it . Its promotion was everywhere . Compared to our team full of ballet dancers, their team naturally had more clout .
With just a glance, I could see many famous actresses . I randomly looked up and saw Liu Nian .
Compared to the last time that I saw her, she was more slim . She had a very pretty blush on her cheeks, and that same air of naivety . Currently, she had a slight smile on her face and was walking towards Yin Li to sit next to him .
Everyone was drunk with merriment .
The atmosphere turned rowdy . The voices were too loud, and everything was in disarray . I walked towards the small garden behind the hotel’s restaurant .
These days, time seemed to flow at a pace faster than normal . I needed to have some alone time for myself .
I never expected that there would already be someone in the garden . I only heard a woman’s soft, frail sobs in the gloomy night .
I started to regret coming . Just as I was about to leave, I heard Yin Li’s voice .
“Sorry, I already have someone I love very much . ”
“Mr . Yin, this is the first time I’ve fallen in love like this . I’ve liked you all along, from the very first time we met . ” The voice apparently belonged to Liu Nian . “Then tell me, what sort of person is the girl you love?” This was probably the first time Liu Nian was brutally rejected like this . Her tone sounded like she was unwilling to accept the matter .
Yin Li grew quiet, then lightly said, “Someone who I probably won’t ever be with . From the very beginning, I had already lost her . ”
I fled .
Shooting had wrapped up . After some final production work, it would be officially considered over . And on that day, Yin Xuan would fall from grace . I, as the supporting actress, had nothing to do now that my scenes were shot . Even the director said that I didn’t need to come on set anymore . Perhaps this celebration banquet would be my final goodbye with Yin Xuan and Yin Li .
As the dinner came to a close, Yin Xuan walked over to my side .
“I will hold a press conference on the second day of the movie’s showings . I don’t want the film to receive attention because of my personal matters . It should be talked about because of its contents . ” As she spoke, her prideful face didn’t even show a single crack . “I just came to let you know that when the time comes, make sure to watch the live broadcast . ”
Then, Yin Xuan turned and walked over to her brother with a smile . “Brother, tonight’s just about over . Let’s go home . ”
“Yan Xiao, goodbye . ” She lifted her chin . She didn’t wait for Yin Li’s reaction and dragged him away .
I looked at their departing figures and was frozen for a moment . I finally said quietly in my heart, “Goodbye . ”
Afterwards, I returned to Wu Ke’s place . I knew in my heart that even though my instinct for ballet was very strong, I still needed to diligently practice for a sustained period of time . Going a day without practicing the basics would cause my body to deteriorate .
“Yan Xiao, you try too hard!” At first, Wu Ke welcomed my return . But after a few days, she grew anxious . “I know that you stepped onto the stage for the first time in the movie and produced a good result . But you can’t force yourself too much . You’re already overworking yourself!”
However, I didn’t take note of her words . I practiced as if I didn’t know what being tired meant . I spun until I felt dizzy .
I don’t know where my motivation for dance came from . I only felt that it was something natural . But this sort of practice didn’t bring me any improvement . Looking at myself in the mirror, I saw someone who couldn’t break through the plateau and was even less forgiving of myself . This sort of vicious feeling only made me increase my practice workload .
For a whole half month, I didn’t exit the studio . Sweat dripped, muscles ached, and time pa.s.sed . Frank could also tell that something was wrong with me . Sometimes, he even stopped recording and s.n.a.t.c.hed away the new ballet shoes I was about to put on .
“Alicia, stop! You are wrecking yourself! You are squandering your talents and the love you have for ballet!”
I forcefully grabbed the shoes out of his hands . “No . Your sponsor definitely wants to see a better me . I will continue . ”
Frank didn’t let it go like that . “My sponsor definitely doesn’t want to see you like this . ” He then walked out, sulking .
I continued facing the mirror and dancing . In between the pauses of the music, I could hear Frank pa.s.sionately speaking into the telephone . He seemed to have a habit of always reporting my developments to this sponsor .
I also knew what I was doing wasn’t healthy . Right now, I was unable to dance with a calm mind . Yin Xuan’s car crash made me forget ballet . But Yin Xuan seemed to also be guiding me . I forgot what ballet felt like . But I wanted to take back everything that was once mine . I wanted to take back my life and find my complete self again . Over this process, ballet gave me a sense of satisfaction and ident.i.ty . But currently, all that was slowly eroding .