Feels like everyone is just holding their breath, Jo thought, catching Cadie"s slightly shadowed eyes. Water slapped against the hull softly as everyone on board waited for Naomi to make a move. She sat still for several seconds, turning the cell phone over and over in one hand as she tugged at her bottom lip with the fingers of the other.
"So..." she finally said. "I guess I"d better call him." She stood and climbed up out of the c.o.c.kpit, picking her way forward to find a little more privacy.
Cadie wondered briefly if she should follow, but thought better of it. She"ll be letting us all know exactly how it went, if I know her.
Sure enough, it wasn"t many minutes before Naomi"s fate became obvious to all. Subdued talking was followed by a protracted pause. Jo, the only one with an un.o.bstructed view of the front of the boat, watched the senator"s silhouette. After being almost rock-still for several minutes, Naomi suddenly exploded into motion, letting loose a long ragged howl of frustration and tossing the cell phone high and far.
The ensuing silence was punctuated by the distant splash of the electronic projectile.
"Tell me that wasn"t my phone," Paul muttered.
"Okay, that wasn"t your phone," Jo lied grimly.
Further conversation was prevented by the return of the senator who stomped back down into the c.o.c.kpit and slumped in her usual corner.
"What"s the news?" Toby asked quietly.
Naomi sighed. "-They want us back there as soon as possible."
It"s always "us" when she"s in trouble, Cadie thought ruefully.
Toby grunted and turned to Jo. "Don"t suppose you know the airline schedules off the top of your head, Jo?" he asked.
Jo nodded. "I know enough to know the first plane to Sydney"s at 9.30am tomorrow," she replied. "That will get you there in time to connect with the outgoing lunchtime flights to LA or San Francisco."
"And you can get us back to the airport in time for that?"
Jo did some rough calculations in her head. "Not unless we sail at night, which isn"t the best plan. But there"s no problem. We can organize a water taxi to get out here by, say, 5.30am. Early enough to get you to Hamilton Island in plenty of time."
Toby nodded. "Then I suggest we all start packing," he said quietly.
Larissa piped up from where she leaned against the starboard rail. "Why do we all have to go back now? There are still a few days to go," she whined.
Naomi stopped her progress towards the companionway and Cadie watched as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Ohhh, Larissa, that was not a good move, the blonde thought with a guilty feeling of relief that the oncoming blast wasn"t going to be directed at her.
The senator turned, walked over to the lanky brunette, and leaned down so she was inches away from Larissa"s slightly startled face. "I"ll tell you why, Larissa," she hissed. "Because I paid for the whole d.a.m.n thing. Because it"s my reputation that got you out of jail in the first place." Jo and Cadie exchanged glances, the blonde smiling slightly at the skipper"s eloquently arched eyebrow. "And because I G.o.dd.a.m.n well said so. Is that all right with you?" Larissa nodded mutely, shrinking away from the senator"s intimidating presence. "Right. Let"s get on with it then, shall we?"
The senator stomped down the companionway and disappeared below. For a few seconds the other pa.s.sengers just sat in silence, absorbing their changed circ.u.mstances. Then, one by one, they stood and trailed down after her. Cadie was the last to go, jumping down off the cowling and casting a find smile in Jo"s direction.
Unexpectedly Jo found it hard to swallow for the tugging ache in her throat. She tried to smile back at the blonde before Cadie turned and headed below decks, but she knew her response had been wobbly at best. d.a.m.n. I thought there would be more time before I started feeling like this. She was aware of Jenny watching her quietly from the top of the companionway and she turned away from the crewman"s scrutiny. I refuse to cry. If I cry now, how the h.e.l.l am I going to cope when she leaves in the morning?
"She threw my G.o.dd.a.m.ned phone into the ocean," Paul lamented from where he stood near the boom. "Can you believe that?"
Perfect end to a perfect day. She reached around and undipped her own cell phone, keying in the Cheswick Marine office manager"s home phone number. "Hi, Doris, it"s Jo," she said when the woman answered. Jo glanced down at her watch, grimacing at the lateness of the hour. "Yeah, I"m really sorry about disturbing you at home this late. But we"ve got a bit of a problem and I need you to make some quick arrangements for me..."
Cadie moved quietly around the cabin, collecting odds and ends that still needed to be packed, and sliding them into nooks and crannies in either her or Naomi"s bags. Normally she wouldn"t have worried about who ended up with what, but a little voice in her head told her to keep her stuff close by.
I"ve already started separating our lives, she realized with a rush. She thought about all the logistics leaving Naomi was going to entail and the complexity of it felt overwhelming. She fought down a slightly panicky feeling. Make like Scarlett O"Hara, Arcadia. Think about today, today and worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. She glanced over to the bed where Naomi was sprawled untidily. The senator had fallen asleep not long after they had started packing, preferring, as usual, to let Cadie do the work.
Cadie watched the familiar outline of her partner"s face for a while. She was again struck by how much the woman had changed from the young college activist she had connected with 12 years earlier.
I should feel sadder about the prospect of leaving you, Naomi. She lovingly tucked a certain cream-colored sweatshirt into the corner of her suitcase. But I don"t. I"m scared, and I don"t know when it"s going to happen, but I don"t have any doubts about it anymore. Being with you hasn"t been what I"ve wanted for myself for a long time. And it only took a couple of weeks around Jo to make me see that. She snorted quietly at herself. h.e.l.l, truth be told, it took about two hours.
She shivered slightly, rubbing her arms to chase away the predawn chill. She knew the water taxi would be coming for them soon.
I don"t want to leave. I don"t want to leave Jo. She leaned over the suitcase, hands pressed onto the top of her clothes, eyes closed as a wave of melancholy threatened to unbalance her. Oh G.o.d, Jo-Jo. I don"t want to go, because I don"t know when I can come back again. And the truth is I don"t want to spend another minute without you. I"ve gone from being someone else"s partner, to being totally and utterly yours. Lock, stock, and barrel. A picture of the tall skipper"s s.e.xy, lopsided grin floated behind her eyelids and Cadie felt herself smile. Not that you would put it that way, my love. But that"s how it feels to me.
A light knocking on the door tore at her attention.
"Come on in."
She looked over as Jenny stuck her head around the door. "Water taxi will be here in about half an hour, Cadie," the hostess said softly.
"Thanks," the blonde replied. She glanced over at her slumbering bedmate. "We"ll be ready, despite all appearances to the contrary."
Jenny smiled back before disappearing again and Cadie sighed. She walked over to the bed and reached down, shaking the senator"s shoulder gently. "Come on, Naomi, time to face the music."
Jo hugged her knees up to her chest and stretched her sweatshirt over them to fight off the pre-dawn chill. She gazed out to the east where pale pinks and yellows were starting to tint the sky. A long, thin line of cloud banded the horizon, its underside glowing orange as the sun threatened to peek above the waterline.
The dark-haired skipper rested the back of her head against the mast, content to let the growing activity below decks carry on without her. Jo hadn"t slept at all but she felt strangely alert, her senses were buzzing.
I don"t want to forget any of this. I don"t want to forget a single detail of the last time I see Cadie. If she manages to get back here someday I want to have something I can compare that happiness to. The perverse logic of that tickled her sense of humor. If she manages to get back here.
She could feel and hear the pa.s.sengers start to move around below. Jenny had done the rounds, warning everyone the water taxi was closing in, and already Paul was helping to move luggage up on deck.
Jo glanced down at her watch. Barely 5.30am. They should get back to the island in time to pick up their spare gear and get to the airport, she mused.
Doris had made some hasty phone calls late the night before and managed to book the Americans onto flights all the way back to Chicago.
Almost 9000 miles away. Nine thousand miles and one enormous G.o.dd.a.m.n ocean away. Jesus, I don"t even have her phone number. As the sun breasted the horizon, bathing the tall woman"s angular face in pale warmth, Jo fought the panicky knot of tension in her stomach.
"Jo-Jo!"
The skipper looked back over her left shoulder to see Jenny waving from the stern. The hostess pointed towards the mainland and Jo squinted. There in the distance was a large yellow motor launch churning through the waves towards them.
"Water taxi, Skipper!"
Jo waved back in acknowledgement and picked herself up off the deck. As she brushed off her shorts she noticed the Americans making their way up on deck. Everyone stood silently watching the approaching vessel. Therese and Sarah had their arms around each other. Toby, taller than his partner, had one arm draped over Jason"s shoulder, his chin resting on top of the shorter man"s head. Larissa and Kelli, as usual, slouched indifferently away from the rest of the group. Naomi was pacing again, up and back in a tight arc that wore Jo out just looking at her.
d.a.m.n she"s wired tighter than the rigging, Jo thought.
Last one up on deck was Cadie. Unlike the others, the blonde was not looking out towards the water taxi. Instead she turned to find Jo. Their eyes locked and like so many times in the past two and a half weeks, the pair felt the world contract around them. Jo slowly began walking towards the stern, while Cadie stood silently in the c.o.c.kpit. The skipper crouched down on the c.o.c.kpit cowling, clasping her hands in front of her as she leaned her forearms on her thighs.
"Good morning," she said softly.
Cadie shook her head slowly back and forth, and Jo could see the early light catching tears that were close to br.i.m.m.i.n.g over blonde lashes. "Not really, no," Cadie replied shakily.
"I know," Jo said. She swallowed back a large chunk of ache and cleared her throat. "You should get to the airport in plenty of time. The folks from the hotel are going to meet the water taxi with your extra luggage and then drive you to the terminal." She knew she was just filling air, and she knew Cadie knew it too, as the blonde nodded her silent response.
Cadie gazed up at the woman she loved, taking in Jo"s mussed hair and the dark circles under hooded blue eyes. She hasn"t slept a wink either. I can only imagine what this feels like for her. She took a step closer to Jo, wanting desperately to say so much more than just goodbye.
"I"m sorry, Jossandra," she said. "I know how much this hurts."
"Ssshhh," Jo said, putting her finger against her own lips. "Don"t. Please. Just don"t forget me."
A sob threatened to escape Cadie"s lips and she put her own hand to her mouth in an effort to contain her emotion. Jo saw anguish close the beautiful eyes she adored and her own heart ached.
"Never," Cadie whispered. "I will be back, Jo-Jo."
Jo shook her head slowly. "No promises, Arcadia," she said quietly. "Just do what you need to do for you. I"ll be here."
Cadie nodded, but further communication was pre-empted by the arrival of the water taxi. Jo pushed herself up, but stayed put, knowing Jenny and Paul could handle things. The two crew tossed lines to the bobbing launch, pulling it closer till it was alongside the Seawolf"s transom. They then started pa.s.sing luggage to the two men onboard the taxi.
"Skipper!" It was Jason, and Jo smiled as the blond man bounded across the deck and threw himself at her in a huge bear hug. She chuckled as she returned the embrace.
"I wanted to thank you," Jason said, stepping back and clasping Jo"s hand. "Regardless of all the bulls.h.i.t with Naomi, Toby and I have had a fantastic time. We want to come back again on our own schedule and spend some more time with you guys." He grinned.
"It"s been a pleasure having you both aboard, mate," Jo replied graciously. "And you"re both welcome, any time. Good sailors will always find a berth on the Seawolf." She grinned back at him.
"I"m sorry she"s been so difficult," Jason said quietly, nodding his head to where the senator continued to pace.
"Forget it," Jo shook it off. "Not your fault for start, and I"ve had more difficult than her to contend with," She smiled again at the shorter man. "Good luck on the way home, though."
Jason rolled his eyes. "G.o.d, I think we"re going to need it," he laughed. "Anyway..." He let go of Jo"s hand and started backing away towards the stern. "Thanks again, Jo, and take care."
"You too, Jason."
She looked over and waved to Toby who gave her a thumbs-up as he clambered into the water taxi. Therese and Sarah, too, turned and waved to the skipper, calling out their thanks as they followed the two men. Larissa and Kelli barely looked back. Big surprise, thought Jo, grateful to see the back ends of the two women. The senator followed, casting one last malevolent look at the tall skipper who just raised an eyebrow in response.
Cadie was the last one to leave. She turned away from Jo to say goodbye to Paul and Jenny. She gave the hostess a quick hug and got a warm smile in return. "I hope the wedding is everything you want it to be, Jen," she said, trying her best to smile back.
"I"ll show you the pictures next time you"re here," Jenny said with a knowing smile, catching the blonde by surprise.
"Um...yes, yes please do that. I"d love to see them." A genuine grin touched Cadie"s eyes at the crewmember"s confidence. "Thanks, Jen. For everything."
Then she turned to Paul. The big crewman scooped her up in a hug, and Cadie giggled as she felt her feet leave the deck. "You take care of yourself, sailor, you hear me?" he said gruffly as he put her down.
"I will, Paulie," she replied. She looked intently up into the tall blond"s brown eyes. "Do me a favor?" she asked.
"If I can, you know I will," he responded, half-knowing what she was wanting.
Cadie glanced briefly towards Jo, who was standing in place, looking down at her feet miserably. "Look after her for me? She"s hurting." The big man nodded silently and Cadie kissed his cheek. "Thank you." She turned to disembark, but was halted by a hand on her shoulder, spinning her back around. She looked up into wide blue eyes that sparkled with unshed tears.
I didn"t even hear her coming, Cadie thought as she felt long arms sliding around her. How does she do that? All further thought was driven from her mind as Jo dipped her head and claimed Cadie"s mouth in a long and searing kiss that drew the blonde up and closer. She slid her hands up to cup Jo"s face and poured her whole heart into her response.
Jo"s knees buckled and she felt one of Cadie"s arms quickly drop and wrap around her waist to support her. They were vaguely aware of a disturbance on the water taxi behind them, but nothing broke the sanct.i.ty of the kiss, until finally, breathless, they pulled gently, slowly apart.
"I"m sorry," Jo murmured. "I couldn"t let you go without..."
Cadie"s fingers silenced her and Jo lost herself in the warm safety of the fair-haired woman"s gaze. "I know. I"m glad you did," Cadie replied softly, gently unraveling herself from Jo"s embrace, sliding her hands into the skipper"s and taking a reluctant step back. "I love you, Jo-Jo."
"And I you." Just their fingers were touching as Cadie backed towards the transom and the waiting water taxi. Over Cadie"s shoulder Jo could see the infuriated senator being held back by Jason and Toby. I just made things a lot harder for her, the skipper knew, acknowledging at the same time that nothing could have stopped her kissing the blonde.
Finally their fingertips brushed, then slid apart, and Cadie silently gave Jo a small wave, which the skipper returned with a crooked smile. Then the blonde took Paul"s offered hand and stepped up into the motor launch. Once aboard she dodged around Naomi and quickly made her way to the stern as the engines fired up and the boat turned away from the Seawolf.
Jo watched the blonde take up her position. She gently raised her fingers to her lips again and blew Cadie a kiss, stretching out her arm towards the departing launch. Cadie replied in kind and Jo caught the kiss, pulled it to her heart, and held it there.
Cadie looked back at the skipper silhouetted against the rising sun, her hand over her heart. Tears slid down the blonde"s cheeks as she held her own arm outstretched. Look at her. My G.o.ddess.
There goes half my heart, Jo thought, watching the love of her life slipping away to the horizon. Finally the ache in her throat took over and tears welled up and overflowed. For a few long minutes all she could do was stand there, one hand over her heart, eyes fixed on the rapidly shrinking motor launch, until finally it disappeared. She closed her eyes and let the tears flow unchecked. Vaguely aware of Paul and Jen moving quietly around the boat, giving her plenty of s.p.a.ce, she slumped down onto the deck, head in hands. This hurts so much. I didn"t know it would hurt this much.
Suddenly her phone rang, startling her as it pierced the early morning silence.
"Jesus," she exhaled, reaching for the device. "Who the h.e.l.l is calling this early?" she muttered, fumbling for the right key. "The day can"t get any worse from here, can It?" Finally she pushed the right b.u.t.ton. "Madison."
"Jo, it"s Doris." It was just as well the Cheswick office manager identified herself because her voice was almost unrecognizable, hoa.r.s.e and ragged with what sounded like panic.
"Doris? What"s wrong?" Jo asked immediately.
"It"s Ron, Jo. He"s had a heart attack. Come back in as soon as you can. Please. It"s bad."
Jo closed her eyes again, squeezing back the thumping headache, which had sprung into life at Doris" words. Wrong again, Madison. Wrong again.
"We"re on our way," she muttered, scrambling to her feet.
Chapter Twelve.
Even after the Sea wolf disappeared over the horizon, Cadie remained at the stern of the water taxi, gazing out to the east, blinking against the glare of the rising sun. If she closed her eyes she could still see the vision of her love-dark hair whipping around her head, golden circle of the sun blazing behind her, a hand clasped over her heart. It was a lovely picture, but Cadie felt only pain as she committed the details to memory.
A million thoughts and emotions churned through Cadie"s mind. Sorrow, love, indecision, anger, and frustration all warred for their place in her consciousness. Chief among them was an overwhelming sense that she was doing the wrong thing by leaving.
But how can that be? No matter how screwed up Naomi and I may be right now, we had something good once. Didn"t we? Cadie covered her face with her hands, momentarily swamped by indecision. That"s why I"m here, isn"t it? Because of our history. Because of all the loose ends. Because she needs me to help her get through this. Doesn"t she?
Behind Cadie, Jason and Toby had managed to wrestle the infuriated senator into the cabin of the water taxi. She sat between the two men, anger and jealousy radiating off her in malevolent waves. Naomi muttered and squirmed in her seat, shaking off Jason and Toby"s hands which had circled her upper arms.
"G.o.dd.a.m.n it, Naomi, you have got to get a grip on yourself," said Toby earnestly, barely resisting the urge to shake some sense into the woman. "Don"t you realize that she"s crucial to how things work out for you in the next few days?" He gestured towards the blonde leaning against the stern rail.
That caught Naomi"s attention and she tore furious eyes away from Cadie and fixed the PR man with a grim stare. "Explain," she growled.
"Well, Jesus, it"s not brain surgery," a frustrated Jason said from her other side. "You"re about to walk into a firestorm. The press think you were not only wasted on G.o.d knows what illegal substances, but that you were with a woman other than your partner at the time. The Australian media may not understand the significance of that, but once we hit US soil, Naomi, there"s gonna be h.e.l.l to pay. You"re the first openly lesbian Republican senator, for Christ"s sake. Part of why you were elected at all was the stability of your relationship with Cadie. You know that."
His partner took up the argument.