He got rid of Jean and took Gemma away so they could talk in private. It hadn"t taken long to find out that Gemma"s only real objection to him was Jean. Right then, he"d wanted to take the time to tell Gemma the full truth about him and Jean, but he"d only told her a bit of it. First, he needed to get everything straight between Jean and himself, then he could go to Gemma and tell her all of it.
15.
WITH RELUCTANCE, COLIN got out of his car and made his way up the back stairs to his apartment. He knew Jean was waiting for him because her silver Mercedes was still in the parking lot.
The first thing he saw when he opened the door to his apartment was his suitcase on the floor. She came out of his bedroom carrying a tiny tube of toothpaste.
"There you are," she said cheerfully. "I waited to see you but you"re so late that I was beginning to think I was going to have to drive home in the dark. Hope you don"t mind if I borrow a piece of your luggage."
"Jean, I . . ." He trailed off, not knowing how to begin. She was going through the old cabinets against the wall.
"Colin, dear, have you been lashing yourself over this? But of course you have. Your deep desire to always do good must be tugging at you. So how was the rest of your little get-together with your Edilean friends? After you sent me away?"
"Fine," he said. It was obvious that even though she hadn"t been in his apartment in months, she was searching for any items she"d left behind. "Let"s sit down and talk, all right?"
"No," she said. "I think that everything has been said. I just wish-" She put up her hands. "No, I promised myself I wouldn"t do this. It is as it is."
"Jean, please sit down and let"s talk about this."
She glared at him. "There is nothing to talk about. You chose someone else. The end. That"s all, folks!"
"You act like you and I were a solid couple and I dumped you."
"Again."
"What?"
"You dumped me again. For the second time. The first time was when I got a job in D.C. You were so jealous you walked out on me."
"Is that what you think I did?"
"I know that"s what you did. You had a job you hated, while I loved mine. Then I got an even better job and you threw a jealous fit and left me. And you walked out on your dad too."
Colin drew in his breath, unable to answer her accusations.
"So now you met some young college student and you"re leaving me. Again. I guess you think this one is going to put up with the way you ignore the women in your life."
Colin was recovering himself and there was a volcano of anger inside him. "I never ignored you. I lived your life," he said quietly.
"No you didn"t." She stopped moving about the room and looked at him. "You hid in my life. You thought you were too good to be a car salesman, but you suffered through it and made everyone miserable, me included. I felt so sorry for you that I took you in and let you live my life."
"Is that how you see it?" Colin asked softly. "There was nothing in it for you? Nothing between us?"
"Sure," she said. "For a while. My regret-" She glared at him. "I regret that I gave you my best years. If I hadn"t had to deal with you, I could be like those women today. I could have a couple of kids and be living in Georgetown now." Her voice was rising. "Do you know why I quit my job in D.C.?"
"Please tell me," he said, his voice cold.
"For you. You never realized that I left all that behind because of you. I missed you and wanted to be with you. I knew you didn"t have anyone, so I came back."
His eyes grew colder. "The scuttleb.u.t.t around the courthouse was that you got fired. I heard that you were sleeping with one of the partners, and his wife threatened to divorce him if you weren"t sent away."
For a moment, Jean"s face seemed to swell with her rage, but then she smiled. "Misusing your badge to snoop, are you?"
"Jean," Colin said, "why do we have to part this way? I told you when you came back that I didn"t think it would work."
"And I said it would." She went to a cabinet and poured herself a drink.
"You"re driving," he said.
"Don"t worry. It"s just club soda." She took a deep drink. "So what happens now? You get rid of me as soon as you can, then run back to your butch girlfriend?" She looked at him through her lashes. "You should have told me that"s what you liked. I would have done a little dress up. You like whips and chains too?"
"Jean, I think you should leave. Better yet, I should go. You stay here and sleep. I don"t want you driving when you"re this angry."
"And where will you go? Back to Mommy? Or to your boxing boyfriend?"
He put his hand on the doork.n.o.b. He couldn"t bear to hear any more of this. If she kept on, he"d be drawn into it, and he"d say things he would regret later.
"Oh, but that"s right. You bought a house, didn"t you? I spent months-years-trying to get you to buy a house with me, but you wouldn"t. You"ve just met this . . . this hermaphrodite and you buy one for her?!"
Abruptly, all the anger left her, and she dropped down on the couch and began to cry.
Colin knew he could have left her rage and false accusations, but he couldn"t leave her in tears. Reluctantly, he closed the door and went to sit beside her. Her sobs were shaking her shoulders, and when she leaned against him, he put his arm around her.
"Jean, I"m sorry," he said. "I"m sorry for all the hurt I"ve caused you. I didn"t leave you because I was jealous of your job."
"Then why?" she asked. "I thought we were good together. I thought we had everything."
If he told the truth, he"d have to say that they"d had nothing together, that it had all been hers-or his father"s. He left to pursue his own dreams, and that maybe he"d learned how to do that from her. Jean would never have taken a job she hated.
"Listen," he said softly and with sympathy in his voice, "why don"t you stay here tonight?"
"You"re going to your house? The one you bought for her?"
Colin dropped his arm from around her shoulder. "I bought a house here in Edilean before I ever met Gemma. Jean, I want to live here. In this town. What did you call the place? "Incestuous," wasn"t it? You told me you wouldn"t live in Edilean even if you were in a coffin. You must see that it could never work between us."
"Why didn"t you tell me this years ago? Now I"m thirty-six and-"
He stood up. "If I"d known it, I would have told you. And please don"t try to make me think that you"re now so old and plain you can"t get another man. From what I hear, you already have one. Or is he actually your brother?"
"Elliot is a guy I work with. I"m mentoring him."
"As I remember it, you"re a great mentor to young men." For a moment, they almost exchanged smiles, and Colin knew it was time for him to leave. "Jean, I"m going to go now. I"d say I"d call you, but I don"t think I should. For all your anger, you knew this was coming. My mistake was in leaving it too long. I"ll . . ." He was at the door. "I"m sure I"ll see you around the courthouses." He left the apartment, feeling part sad for what was gone from his life, and part elated at the mystery of the future that awaited him.
Inside the apartment, Jean stopped the tears and anger instantly.
"b.a.s.t.a.r.d!" she said aloud, then went to the cabinet and poured herself a Scotch. One thing about Colin was that he had good taste in liquor-and he could afford the best.
She looked through the tiny, ugly kitchen to see what she could cook. Nothing. She hadn"t eaten one of those revolting burgers at Colin"s boring friends" house. She hated the things anyway. Besides, the sight of that girl in her tiny shorts and even tinier tank top slamming away at that hunk of a man, Mike Newland, made Jean lose what appet.i.te she"d had.
Afterward, when Colin had dismissed Jean as though she weren"t important, she"d been furious-but she didn"t show it. In backwater Edilean, she knew to smile until her face ached.
When her gla.s.s was half empty, she called her uncle. "Have you eaten?" she asked as casually as she could, but she made sure there was a little hiccup in her voice.
"No. Jean, are you all right?"
"It"s been a rough day."
"Come over and we"ll talk about it."
Jean hung up, smiling.
16.
YAWNING, GEMMA SCRAMBLED a couple of eggs and put two slices of whole wheat bread in the toaster. Last evening Ramsey and Tess had driven her home. Gemma hadn"t wanted to ride with them, but Joce had nudged her forward. She"d felt instant camaraderie with nearly everyone she"d met in Edilean, but there"d been animosity between her and Tess.
Tess started talking the minute Rams pulled out of the driveway. "Okay," she said, "I think I came on too strong and made a bad first impression."
"You scared her to death," Rams said.
"Not really-" Gemma began.
"Mike likes you," Tess said.
"That means you could commit murder and Tess would testify in your defense," Rams said.
"Would you mind?" Tess said to her husband. "I"m trying to apologize." She looked back at Gemma but didn"t seem to know what to say.
Gemma searched for a common ground between them. "It"s all right. Maybe after the baby is born, we can work out together."
"If Mike had his way, Sara and I"d be in the gym now," Tess said.
"That"s a good idea," Gemma said. "You could do light leg extensions and some arm work."
Tess shook her head. "You and Mike!"
Gemma was glad when Rams pulled into the Frazier driveway and let her off at the guesthouse. She thanked them, said good-bye, and unlocked her door. They only left when she was safely inside.
She was glad for the quiet after the long day. She picked up her canvas reading bag, put her cell phone and a box of letters dated 1775 in it, and went outside to read.
She was still searching for Winnie, still trying to find out more about the Heartwishes Stone. One thing she"d decided was that she would not make her dissertation about the Stone. Seeing the way the people of Edilean were so fascinated with the idea of being granted wishes, with everyone thinking what they"d wish for, made Gemma see the Stone as dangerous. What if the story of Nell"s wish coming true got out? No amount of telling people that everything that happened was just a coincidence would stop what could become a stampede. People would descend on little Edilean in ma.s.sive numbers-or on the Fraziers.
Gemma didn"t like to imagine all the things that could happen if the world heard about a Stone that could grant wishes.
To not make the Stone the basis of her dissertation wasn"t an easy decision for her. A paper on an unusual subject that was backed up by facts could get her a very good grade-and that would help her get an excellent job.
But it wasn"t worth it, she thought. A good grade, even a great job wasn"t worth the risk. Besides, she"d rather get the job on her own merits, not because she"d started a riot.
She was in bed by ten. At midnight, she was awakened by her phone buzzing. It was a text message from Colin asking if she"d help him buy furniture for his new house. She knew what he meant, but she couldn"t help texting, The stores are closed now. Go to bed.
He texted back.
Funny. Meet me at Fresh Market at 9 a.m. tomorrow?
Will be there.
she wrote back and turned off her phone.
This morning after she"d eaten, she took some time deciding what to wear. Was this to be considered their first date? she wondered. Were they going to one of those splendid furniture stores where everything cost a lot, or to one of those warehouses with no heating or cooling?
She had her hand on her only silk blouse when she thought that Mrs. Frazier and Jean would go to the cla.s.sy place. Colin was a warehouse-type man. She put on jeans and a pink linen shirt.
When she got to the grocery-she"d used MapQuest to find it-she didn"t see Colin. When he stepped out of a big black pickup truck, she smiled. "I guess the Fraziers change vehicles often."
"What?" Colin asked. "Oh, yeah, sure. You ready to go? I have drinks in the cab."
He got in the driver"s side, leaving Gemma to get in by herself. She had to step up high to get in. There was a gym bag on the floor and his hair was wet. It looked like he"d worked out this morning. She wished he"d invited her, but from the bleak expression he was wearing, maybe he"d needed to be alone. It was obvious that something was bothering him.
Colin started the big truck and pulled onto the road. "It"ll take over an hour to get to the store. Hope that"s okay."
She said it was, but then they were silent. After about ten minutes, Gemma couldn"t take it anymore. "Are you one of those men who wants a woman to beg him to tell her what"s wrong?"
He glanced at her. "What does that mean?"
"You know, the man sighs loud enough to blow magazines off the coffee table, she asks what"s wrong, he says nothing is, and it goes from there. It can take hours to get him to tell her that he"s angry about something his boss did."
"That"s not me," Colin said. "At least not usually. But tell me, if a man"s that much trouble, why does she bother trying to get him to tell her what"s wrong?"
Gemma threw up her hands. "Survival! He won"t leave her alone until she does drag it out of him, that"s why! He won"t let her read, watch TV, talk on the phone, nothing until he"s told her whatever he"s fretting about."
Colin raised an eyebrow. "Last boyfriend?"
"Last two boyfriends!"
"All right, I won"t be number three. Jean and I had it out yesterday, and the things she said are still bothering me."
Gemma waited for him to continue, but he said nothing. "So you are one of those men who needs to be coaxed?"