"I believe you were," said Alfred, with alacrity. "It"s no good going now, for the medal"s certain to be in the melting-pot. Besides, I"ve no fancy for having the police in, interfering with my private business.
And I think it would be just as well if we neither of us said a word about it."
"Oh, I must tell Mrs Warboys," said Mrs Smithers. "I wouldn"t miss seeing her laugh over that story were it ever so. As for pore Mrs Push, when I come to the part when I put your boots on my feet because yours squeaked louder, and you"d got your head under the bed-clothes, and I said--"
"Oh, look here," said Alfred, desperately, "I do wish you wouldn"t. I"d really much rather not. It isn"t often I ask for anything particular, but if that story"s told it"s almost certain to be taken up in the wrong way as far as it concerns me. I"ve made a blunder and I"ve lost my medal. Ain"t that enough for you?"
"Then you"ve given up that Klondike idea," observed Mrs Smithers, with more consecutiveness than was immediately apparent.
"Certainly; oh, certainly! It was just a wandering notion that wouldn"t stand thinking over. And I shall smooth old Peter Begg down all right.
There will be a little give-and-take compromise on both sides. It only wants tactful handling. Garson & Begg have been very good friends to me, and I"m not going to throw them over. I couldn"t do it, even if you asked it."
"I don"t ask it," said Mrs Smithers, drily. "Get that fixed right by to-night and I won"t say nothing."
On his way to the City he reflected that it would indeed require tact.
However, he entered Mr Begg"s room and did his best.
"I"ve come," he said, "to apologise, sir, very humbly for the way I spoke yesterday. As you saw, I wasn"t myself, sir."
"Then you _were_ drunk?" said Mr Begg with mild interest.
"Oh, no, sir. At least it was more drugged. I"d suffered torments all day with toothache, and took a little laudanum for it, and that made me come over all anyhow. If I"d been myself I"d sooner have cut off my right hand--"
"That"ll do," said Mr Begg. "No more need be said about it in that case.
But when you are troubled with toothache again I should advise you either to take a little less laudanum _or to take a good deal more_. Now get on with your work."
Thus tact triumphed.
Mrs Smithers kept her word, and Mrs Warboys and the relict of the late Charles Push have missed a story which would undoubtedly have amused them. Smithers has returned to his natural _role_. The newspaper cuttings have been replaced by a chromo which happened to fit the frame exactly, and the happiness is general.
SOME NOTES ON CYRUS VERD
The name of Cyrus Verd, once so frequently seen in the newspapers and heard in conversation, has now for many years past been rarely mentioned. The absolute retirement of the latter part of his life helped the public--always ready to forget--to forget him. A few weeks ago at the club I happened to say something or other about him, and a man who, as a rule, knows his world turned to me and asked who Cyrus Verd was.
The obituary notice of him in the _Times_ the other day may possibly have revived interest in what was really rather an extraordinary personality. But the notice was brief, and beyond names and dates said little more than that he was "an eccentric millionaire, who, at the age of forty-five, chose to surrender almost the whole of his wealth and live a life of comparative poverty. It is said that this step was the result of some curious religious convictions, but Cyrus Verd himself never in his lifetime offered any explanation of it."
The few notes which I propose to add, including as they do a personal reminiscence of the man, may possibly be of interest. A writer of fiction constantly arranges his problem to suit his solution of it; it is perhaps beneficial, though somewhat humiliating, that he should occasionally turn his attention to the problems that real life sets him, and see how much more difficult it is to find the solution then.
Cyrus Verd came to England in his thirty-fourth year, an age at which many men are only at the commencement of their career. He had already made his fortune. I cannot say exactly how rich he was. Many newspaper paragraphs at the time gave estimates of his annual income--all different. I should say that the only man who really knew was Cyrus Verd himself. He owned steamships, railways, factories, mines, and enough land for a small nation. On his arrival in London many stories were told of his extravagance and eccentricity.
He was debating where he should reside, and a friend suggested that he should take or build a house in Park Lane.
"Where is Park Lane?" asked Cyrus Verd. He had been only two days in London.
"Runs along the east side of Hyde Park, in the most fashionable quarter.
Your coachman would know it."
Verd went to look at it, and returned.
"Yes," he said, "it would be a fair site for a house--one house. But there seems to be some brick tenements there of some sort or other already. I suppose I could get those cleared away?"
He made the attempt, and was very angry at first when he found that he could not "get those cleared away." But he soon grew more philosophical.
"Your people," he observed, "cling to their little homes, I guess."
He was always much disappointed at first if he found there was anything which he could not buy. He went over the National Gallery alone one morning; he was a judge of pictures, and occasionally he put a pencil cross on his catalogue. When he got downstairs again he said to the man who handed him his umbrella:
"My name"s Cyrus Verd, and I"m at the Metropole. Write that down. Send me round the things I"ve marked on my list and my secretary will hand you the cheque."
This story was much exaggerated in the newspapers; it was said that he had offered to buy the entire National Gallery, building and all, as it stood. I cannot say whether or not there was any truth in the report which appeared about the same time, to the effect that he had endeavoured to buy the Crown jewels; but, as far as I can judge his character, it does not seem impossible.
At the same time it would be rash to attempt to judge his character only from such reports as these. The secretary of a well-known charitable inst.i.tution made that mistake. He wrote to ask for a donation to the inst.i.tution, and guaranteed that it should be acknowledged by public advertis.e.m.e.nt in four of the leading dailies. Cyrus Verd wrote back that he had much pleasure in accepting the offer, and enclosed fourpence in stamps. The acknowledgment appeared as promised, and once more made Cyrus Verd a common topic of conversation.
But one of the strangest things that he did never got into the newspapers at all. He left, intentionally, ten pounds in gold on the seat of a railway carriage. On the following day he inquired at the Lost Property Office if the money had been brought back. He was told, with a smile, that it had not been brought back, and that there was no earthly probability that it ever would be. He repeated the experiment, and again failed to recover the money. He repeated it twenty times on different lines, and at last a carriage-cleaner found the money and brought it back. Cyrus Verd took the name and address of that carriage-cleaner, made inquiries about him and then sent for him.
"I don"t see why I should reward you at all. It"s the company"s business. You"re their servant, and such actions as yours increase the feelings of security and confidence in their pa.s.sengers. Are you suited to a better position than you"ve got?"
"Yes, I am," said the man, "I"m a steady man, and I"ve a talent for figures. I"m known for it among my mates."
"Call on the chairman of directors--here is his private address--give him my card, explain the circ.u.mstances, and tell him from me that he is to put you in a position of trust, with at least three times your present wages."
The man came back to say that the chairman had laughed at him--had said that he was not the man to whom the application should have been made, and that there was no chance of its being entertained in any case.
"I must go and see him myself then," said Cyrus Verd.
The chairman was not in a very good temper.
"Really, Mr Verd, you"ll be asking me to carry your luggage next. It"s no part of my duties as chairman of the directors to undertake business of this kind. What that man ought to have done--"
"He did what I told him. You can get this put through if you like. Will you?"
"Frankly, I won"t. It creates a precedent. It--"
"One moment, sir. If you"ll have a copy of Bradshaw brought in here I"ll show you something."
Now, the chairman knew that Cyrus Verd was eccentric, and so he was not surprised. He did not respect eccentricity. But he respected capital; and he knew that Cyrus Verd had already--thanks to his capital--had some little games with railway companies. So he rang the bell, and a Bradshaw was brought.
When the servant had gone Verd drew a penny blue chalk-pencil from his pocket. He opened the Bradshaw, unfolded the map, and, without saying a word, made certain marks upon it.
The chairman watched him closely, and his face changed. "Who"s going to do it?" he gasped. Then he repented, as a man does repent when he has given himself away. "Parliament?" he said.
"That"s all right," remarked Cyrus Verd, replacing his blue pencil.
"I"ve asked. They daren"t block it."
"It wouldn"t pay," the chairman said, with an effort at the careless smile.