"Welcome to the Everything," came an odd voice. Kenji"s mind felt like an old computer booting up for the first time in a long while."The embryonic stage of gestation is the period after implantation, during which all of the major organs and structures within the growing mammal are formed. This is what is happening to you now. Do not be afraid," the voice said, so soothing and yet robotic. Like an AI so close to perfection, but with just the slightest hint of her robotic roots.
Kenji thought for a moment and decided to ask his question anyway.
"Where am I?" He said.
"The embryonic stage of gestation is the period after impl"
"Yes, I understand you"ve read a dictionary. But where is this in relation to where I was?"
Peering around, Kenji stood in what some would consider being everything. A galaxy here, a few super-stars there, and a big dark patch slowly consuming it all while a white hole busily spewed all manner of galactic contents as if to fill up s.p.a.ce. Stardust tickled his non-existent feet, and somehow a warm wind fluttered non-existent hair. It was rather odd, Kenji decided.
"You are here in the Everthing, with me," she said. Kenji turned, a strange concept when he had no body, and was met by a naked woman with snow-white skin. Pale lips were pulled back to reveal ink-black teeth set into a beaming smile. Not just her teeth, her hair was darker than dark, her eyes wells of crude oil and every line of her face seemed a bottomless creva.s.se.
The strangest thing of all, however, was that Kenji felt no fear. Nothing. Not even a little pinch of his nerves affected him when presented with this monster while they floated through the Everything that was reality.
"You are quite dead, so please do not panic. Your father is taking your things from your apartment as we speak, and your mother is letting your sister know over the phone of your pa.s.sing. This is quite final, by the way, so please do not attempt to ask me to be reborn there. You are dead, the only way now is forward onto somewhere new."
"Those b.a.s.t.a.r.ds...what was the point? Why put me through that machine at all?"
The woman tilted her head to one side.
"I thought that rather obvious. So you can be here, of course."
"And what am I to do? You know, seeing that I"m "here"" Kenji said, wishing he had a foot to tap. Or fingers with which to display a very certain gesture. Perhaps it was for the best he couldn"t do so on reflection, whatever this woman was, this G.o.d, Kenji realised it might be best to not to antagonize her.
"Because if this is heaven then I would like a top of the line gaming rig for starters. We can talk about which wishes I"ll ask for next once I download the latest patch of wo-"
"You will choose one of two paths, and be reborn into a new world," The woman said, quite uncaring for the desires of the recently deceased. "A world filled with magic, monsters, adventure and opportunity. Although, you are not as evil as the rest. Which is a problem, my brother said only the most wicked would be pa.s.sing through," the woman frowned, cracks darker than distant black holes spreading across otherwise gorgeous features.
"Do I get powers then? Like in the games, a magic sword, or the ability to win the heart of any woman with a kiss?"
"Crude, but close. You get two options as I said. The first is a mix and match. Here are your current attributes," with a wave, the knowledge became nestled in whatever Kenji currently had for a head. Activating something, a menu appeared:
[ Name: Kenji ]
[ Cla.s.s: Gamer ]
[ Strength: 3 ]
[ Agility: 3 ]
[ Intelligence: 10 ]
[ Willpower: 8 ]
[ Cunning: 18 ]
[skills: Scheme, Bluff, impersonate, charm, strategize. ]
"As you can see, you are quite the conniving type. But so weak, you don"t even register in the other categories such as magic or const.i.tution. And your skills..." she gave Kenji a long look, "maybe you really are evil, and I"ve gotten something wrong?"
As she spoke a black hole sucked on a distant galaxy in a whirl of light.
"No, no! Definitely a good guy here, the best! So why not give me some extra power, eh? Something I can use to knock the snot out of the other ACTUAL evil people and save the world or something?"
The woman put a black nail to pale lip and stretched the web of cracks around her eyes as she thought.
Distantly, two moons collided as a decision was reached.
"That would be very bad," she concluded. "We need evil people for this world, that was kind of the point. The people there... are swamped, by monsters, politics and evil enterprise certainly. But it is not enough, it has been the council"s decision that yet more evil must be added, in order to provide an opportunity for good-hearted heroes to naturally arise. So I"m sorry, but I"ll have to delete you from existence now-"
"WAIT!" Kenji raised his non-existent hands, the woman pausing halfway through producing a bar of nothingness. The nothingness was pure white, as if everything within had been erased, that within the said gap existed not a single law of physics, nor atom of any universe.
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A very real feeling of growing sweaty washed over Kenji"s non-existent body.
Thinking on his feet, Kenji had but a moment to save himself from being deleted from the Everything.
"I might not be evil, but I could try?"