At noon the heat of his room became even more intolerable than his thoughts. His head beat with pain. He was bathed in sweat, weak and trembling. He dragged himself up, went to his washstand, and dipped his wincing face into the warmish, stale water. His lips felt cracked and dry and swollen. In the wavy mirror he saw a distorted image of his face, with its heavy eyes, scattered hair, and the darkening marks of his father"s blows, punctuated by the scarlet scratches of the emerald. He dried his face, loosened his collar, and, gasping for air, came out into the narrow hall.
The hotel was very still. He hurried through it, his face bent, and went by the back way to the saloon. At this hour Sheila was asleep. Carthy would be alone in The Aura and there would be few, if any, customers.
d.i.c.kie found the place cool and quiet and empty, shuttered from the sun, the air stirred by electric fans. Carthy dozed in his chair behind the bar. He gave d.i.c.kie his order, somnambulantly. d.i.c.kie took it off to a dim corner and drank with the thirst of a wounded beast.
Three or four hours later he staggered back to his room. A thunderstorm was rumbling and flashing down from the mountains to the north. The window was purple-black, and a storm wind blew the dirty curtains, straight and steady, into the room. The cool wind tasted and smelt of hot dust. d.i.c.kie felt his dazed way to the bed and steadied himself into a sitting posture. With infinite difficulty he rolled and lighted a cigarette, drew at it, took it out, tried to put it again between his lips, and fell over on his back, his arm trailing over the edge of the bed. The lighted cigarette slipped from his fingers to the ragged strip of matting. d.i.c.kie lay there, breathing heavily and regularly in a drunken and exhausted sleep.
A vivid, flickering pain in his arm woke him. He thought for an instant that he must have died and dropped straight into h.e.l.l. The wind still blew in upon him, but it blew fire against him. Above him there was a heavy panoply of smoke. His bedclothes were burning, his sleeve was on fire. The boards of his floor cracked and snapped in regiments of flame.
He got up, still in a half stupor, plunged his arm into the water pitcher, saw, with a startled oath, that the woodwork about his door was blazing in long tongues of fire which leaped up into the rafters of the roof. His brain began to telegraph its messages ... the hotel was on fire. He could not imagine what had started it. He remembered Sheila.
He ran along the pa.s.sage, the roar of that wind-driven fire following him as the draft from his window through his opened door gave a sudden impulse to the flames, and he came to Sheila"s sitting-room. He knocked, had no answer, and burst in. He saw instantly that she had gone. Her father"s picture had been taken, her little books, her sketches, her work-basket, her small yellow vase. Things were scattered about. As he stood staring, a billow of black smoke rolled into the room. He went quickly through the bedroom and the bath, calling "Sheila" in a low, uncertain voice, returned to the sitting-room to find the air already pungent and hot. There was a paper pinned up on the mantel. Sheila"s writing marched across it. d.i.c.kie rubbed the smoke from his eyes and read:
"I am going away from Millings. And I am not coming back. Amelia may have the things I have left. I don"t want them."
This statement was addressed to no one.
"She has gone to New York," thought d.i.c.kie. His confused mind became possessed with the immediate purpose of following her. There was an Eastern train in the late afternoon. Only he must have money and it was--most of it--in his room. He dashed back. The pa.s.sage was ablaze; his room roared like the very heart of a furnace. It was no use to think of getting in there. Well, he had something in his pocket, enough to start him. He plunged, choking, into Sheila"s sitting-room again. For some reason this flight of hers had brought back his hope. There was to be a beginning, a fresh start, a chance.
He went over to the chair where Sheila had sat in the comfort, of his arms and he touched the piece of tapestry on its back. That was his good-bye to Millings. Then he fastened his collar, smoothed his hair, standing close before Sheila"s mirror, peering and blinking through the smoke, and b.u.t.toned his coat painstakingly. There would be a hat downstairs. As he turned to go he saw a little brown leather book lying on the floor below the mantel. He picked it up. Here was something he could take to Sheila. With an impulse of tenderness he opened it. His eyes were caught by a stanza--
"The blessed damozel leaned out From the gold bar of Heaven; Her eyes were deeper than the depth Of waters stilled at even; She had three lilies in her hand, And the stars in her hair were seven--"
There are people, no doubt, who will not be able to believe this truthful bit of d.i.c.kie"s history. The smoke was drifting across him, the roar of the nearing fire was in his ears, he was at a great crisis in his affairs, his heart was hot with wounded love, and his brain hot with whiskey and with hope. Nevertheless, he did now, under the spell of those printed words, which did not even remotely resemble any words that he had ever read or heard before, forget the smoke, the roar, the love, the hope, and, standing below Sheila"s mirror, he did read "The Blessed Damozel" from end to end. And the love of those lovers, divided by all the s.p.a.ce between the shaken worlds, and the beauty of her tears made a great and mystic silence of rapture about him. "O G.o.d!" d.i.c.kie said twice as he read. He brushed away the smoke to see the last lines,--"And wept--I heard her tears." The ecstatic pain of beauty gripped him to the forgetfulness of all other pain or ecstasy. "O G.o.d!"
He came to with a start, shut the book, stuck it into his pocket, and, crooking his arm over his smarting eyes, he plunged out of the room.
Millings had become aware of its disaster. d.i.c.kie, fleeing by the back way, leaping dangers and beating through fire, knew by the distant commotion that the Fire Brigade, of which he was a member, was gathering its men for the glory of their name. He saw, too, that with a wind like this to aid the fire, there wasn"t a chance for The Aura, and a queer pang of sympathy for his father stabbed him. "It will kill Pap," thought d.i.c.kie. Save for this pang, he ran along the road toward the station with a light, adventurous heart. He did not know that he had started the fire himself. The stupor of his sleep had smothered out all memory of the cigarette he had lighted and let fall. Unwittingly d.i.c.kie had killed the beauty of his father"s dream, and now, just as unwittingly, he was about to kill the object of his father"s pa.s.sion. When he looked back from the station platform, the roof of The Aura was already in a blaze.
PART TWO
THE STARS
CHAPTER I
THE HILL
Thatcher spoke to his horses, now fatherly, now masterly, now with a professorial sarcasm: "Come on, Monkey, there"s a good girl! Get out of that, you Fox! Dern you! You call that pulling? It"s my notion of layin"
off for the day." Even at its most urgent, his voice was soft, hushed by the great loneliness of this canon up which he slowly crept. Monkey and Fox had been plodding, foot by foot, the creaking wagon at their heels, since dawn. It was now ten o"clock and they were just beginning to climb.
The Hill, that looked so near to the mesa above Hudson"s yard, still stood aloof. It had towered there ahead of them as they jerked and toiled across the interminable flat in their accompanying cloud of dust. The great circle of the world had dwarfed them to a bitter insignificance: a team of crickets, they seemed, driven by a gnome. The hushed tone of Thatcher"s voice made unconscious tribute to this immensity.
As they came to the opening of the canon, the high mountain-top disappeared; the immediate foothills closed down and shut it out. The air grew headily light. Even under the blazing July sun, it came cool to the lungs, cool and intensely sweet. Thousands of wild flowers perfumed it and the sun-drawn resin of a thousand firs. All the while the rushing of water accompanied the creaking of Thatcher"s progress. Not far from the road, down there below in a tangle of pine branches, willows, and ferns, the frost-white stream fled toward the valley with all the seeming terror of escape. Here the team began their tugging and their panting and their long pauses to get breath. Thatcher would push forward the wooden handle that moved his brake, and at the sound and the grating of the wheel the horses would stop automatically and stand with heaving sides. The wagon shook slightly with their breathing. At such times the stream seemed to shout in the stillness. Below, there began to be an extraordinary view of the golden country with its orange mesas and its dark, purple rim of mountains. Millings was a tiny circle of square pebbles, something built up by children in their play. The awful impersonalities of sky and earth swept away its small human importance. Thatcher"s larkspur-colored eyes absorbed serenity. They had drawn their color and their far-sighted clearness from such long contemplations of distant horizon lines.
Now and again, however, Thatcher would glance back and down from his high seat at his load. It consisted, for the most part, of boxes of canned goods, but near the front there was a sort of nest, made from bags of Indian meal. In the middle of the nest lay another bundle of slim, irregular outline. It was covered with a thin blanket and a piece of sacking protected it from the sun. A large, clumsy parcel lay beside it.
Each time Thatcher looked at this portion of his load he pulled more anxiously at his mustache. At last, when the noon sun stood straight above the pa.s.s and he stopped to water his horses at a trough which caught a trickle of spring water, he bent down and softly raised the piece of sacking, suspended like a tent from one fat sack to another above the object of his uneasiness. There, in the complete relaxation of exhausted sleep, lay Sheila, no child more limp and innocent of aspect; her hair damp and ringed on her smooth forehead, her lips mournful and sweet, sedately closed, her expression at once proud and innocent and wistful, as is the sleeping face of a little, little girl. There was that look of a broken flower, that look of lovely death, that stops the heart of a mother sometimes when she bends over a crib and sees damp curls in a halo about a strange, familiar face.
Thatcher, looking at Sheila, had some of these thoughts. A teamster is either philosopher or clown. One cannot move, day after day, all day for a thousand days, under a changeless, changeful sky, inch by inch, across the surface of a changeless, changeful earth and not come very near to some of the locked doors of the temple where clowns sleep and wise men meditate. And Thatcher was a father, one of the wise and reasonable fathers of the West, whose seven-year-old sons are friends and helpmates and toward whom six-year-old daughters are moved to little acts of motherliness.
The sun blazed for a minute on Sheila"s face. She opened her eyes, looked vaguely from some immense distance at Thatcher, and then sat up.
"Oh, gracious!" said Sheila, woman and sprite and adventurer again.
"Where the d.i.c.kens is my hat? Did it fall out?"
"No, ma"am," Thatcher smiled in a relieved fashion. "I put it under the seat."
Sheila scrambled to a perch on one of the sacks and faced the surface of half a world.
"Oh, Mr. Thatcher, isn"t it too wonderful! How high are we? Is this the other side? Oh, no, I can see Millings. Poor tiny, tiny Millings! It _is_ small, isn"t it? How very small it is! What air!" She shut her eyes, drawing in the perfumed tonic. The alt.i.tude had intoxicated her. Her heart was beating fast, her blood tingling, her brain electrified. Every sense seemed to be sharpened. She saw and smelt and heard with abnormal vividness.
"The flowers are awfully bright up here, aren"t they?" she said. "What"s that coral-colored bushy one?"
"Indian paint-brush."
"And that blue one? It _is_ blue! I don"t believe I ever knew what blueness meant before."
"Lupine. And over yonder"s monkshead. That other"s larkspur, that poisons cattle in the spring. On the other side you"ll see a whole lot more--wild hollyhock and fireweed and columbine--well, say, I learned all them names from a dude I drove over one summer."
"And such a sky!" said Sheila, lifting her head, "and such big pines!"
She lost herself for a minute in the azure immensity above. A vast mosque of cloud, dome bubbles great and small, stood ahead of them, dwarfing every human experience of height. "Mr. Thatcher, there isn"t any air up here. What is it we"re trying to breathe, anyway?"
He smiled patiently, sympathetically, and handed her a tin mug of icy water from the little trickling spring. The bruise of Hudson"s kiss ached at the cold touch of the water and a shadow fell over her excitement. She thanked the driver gravely.
"What time is it now?" she asked.
"Past noon. Better eat your sandwich."
She took one from its wrapping pensively, but ate it with absent-minded eagerness. Thatcher"s blue eyes twinkled.
"Seems like I recollect a lady that didn"t want no food to be put in for her."
"I remember her, too," said Sheila, between bites, "but very, very vaguely."
She stood up after a third sandwich, shook crumbs from her skirt, and stretched her arms. "What a great sleep I"ve had! Since six o"clock!"
She stared down at the lower world. "I"ve left somebody at Millings."
"Who"s that?" asked Thatcher, drawling the words a trifle as a Westerner does when he is conscious of a double meaning.
"Me."
Thatcher laughed. "You"re a real funny girl, Miss Arundel," he said.
"Yes, I left one Me when I decided to go into the saloon, and now I"ve left another Me. I believe people shed their skins like snakes."
"Yes"m, I"ve had that notion myself. But as you get older, your skin kind of peels off easy and gradual--you don"t get them shocks when you sort of come out all new and shiny and admirin" of yourself."