Instead of going home at once, when he arrived at Kirk Street, he stopped at certain shops in the neighborhood to make some purchases which evidently had reference to the guest of the evening; for the first things he bought were two or three lemons and a pound of loaf sugar.
So far his proceedings were no doubt intelligible enough; but they gradually became more and more incomprehensible when he began to walk up and down two or three streets, looking about him attentively, stopping at every locksmith"s and ironmonger"s shop that he pa.s.sed, waiting to observe all the people who might happen to be inside them, and then deliberately walking on again. In this way he approached, in course of time, a very filthy little row of houses, with some very ill-looking male and female inhabitants visible in detached positions, staring out of windows or lingering about public-house doors.
Occupying the lower story of one of these houses was a small grimy shop, which, judging by the visible stock-in-trade, dealt on a much larger scale in iron and steel ware that was old and rusty, than in iron and steel ware that was new and bright. Before the counter no customer appeared; behind it there stood alone a squalid, bushy browed, hump-backed man, as dirty as the dirtiest bit of iron about him, sorting old nails. Mat, who had unintelligibly pa.s.sed the doors of respectable ironmongers, now, as unintelligibly, entered this doubtful and dirty shop; and addressed himself to the unattractive stranger behind the counter. The conference in which the two immediately engaged was conducted in low tones, and evidently ended to the satisfaction of both; for the squalid shopman began to whistle a tune as he resumed his sorting of the nails, and Mat muttered to himself; "That"s all right,"
as he came out on the pavement again.
His next proceeding--always supposing that it had reference to the reception of Mr. Blyth--was still more mysterious. He went into one of those grocer"s shops which are dignified by the t.i.tle of "Italian Warehouses," and bought a small lump of the very best refined wax! After making this extraordinary purchase, which he put into the pocket of his trousers, he next entered the public-house opposite his lodgings; and, in defiance of what Zack had told him about Valentine"s temperate habits, bought and brought away with him, not only a fresh bottle of Brandy, but a bottle of old Jamaica Rum besides.
Young Thorpe had not returned from Mr. Blyth"s when Mat entered the lodgings with these purchases. He put the bottles, the sugar, and the lemons in the cupboard--cast a satisfied look at the three clean tumblers and spoons already standing on the shelf--relaxed so far from his usual composure of aspect as to smile--lit the fire, and heaped plenty of coal on, to keep it alight--then sat down on his bearskins--wriggled himself comfortably into the corner, and threw his handkerchief over his face; chuckling gruffly for the first time since the past night, as he put his hand in his pockets, and so accidentally touched the lump of wax that lay in one of them.
"Now I"m all ready for the Painter-Man," growled Mat behind the handkerchief, as he quietly settled himself to go to sleep.
CHAPTER X. THE SQUAW"S MIXTURE.
Like the vast majority of those persons who are favored by Nature with, what is commonly termed, "a high flow of animal spirits," Zack was liable, at certain times and seasons, to fall from the heights of exhilaration to the depths of despair, without stopping for a moment, by the way, at any intermediate stages of moderate cheerfulness, pensive depression, or tearful gloom. After he had parted from his mother, he presented himself again at Mr. Blyth"s house, in such a prostrate condition of mind, and talked of his delinquencies and their effect on his father"s spirits, with such vehement bitterness of self-reproach, as quite amazed Valentine, and even alarmed him a little on the lad"s account. The good-natured painter was no friend to contrite desperation of any kind, and no believer in repentance, which could not look hopefully forward to the future, as well as sorrowfully back at the past. So he laid down his brush, just as he was about to begin varnis.h.i.+ng the "Golden Age;" and set himself to console Zack, by reminding him of all the credit and honor he might yet win, if he was regular in attending to his new studies--if he never flinched from work at the British Museum, and the private Drawing School to which he was immediately to be introduced--and if he ended as he well might end, in excusing to his father his determination to be an artist, by showing Mr. Thorpe a prize medal, won by the industry of his son"s hand in the Schools of the Royal Academy.
A necessary characteristic of people whose spirits are always running into extremes, is that they are generally able to pa.s.s from one change of mood to another with unusual facility. By the time Zack had exhausted Mr. Blyth"s copious stores of consolation, had partaken of an excellent and plentiful hot lunch, and had pa.s.sed an hour up stairs with the ladies, he predicted his own reformation just as confidently as he had predicted his own ruin about two hours before; and went away to Kirk Street, to see that his friend Mat was at home to receive Valentine that evening, stepping along as nimbly and swinging his stick as cheerfully, as if he had already vindicated himself to his father by winning every prize medal that the Royal Academy could bestow.
Seven o"clock had been fixed as the hour at which Mr. Blyth was to present himself at the lodgings in Kirk Street. He arrived punctual to the appointed time, dressed jauntily for the occasion in a short blue frock coat, famous among all his acquaintances for its smartness of cut and its fabulous old age. From what Zack had told him of Mat"s lighter peculiarities of character, he antic.i.p.ated a somewhat uncivilized reception from the elder of his two hosts; and when he got to Kirk Street, he certainly found that his expectations were, upon the whole, handsomely realized.
On mounting the dark and narrow wooden staircase of the tobacconist"s shop, his nose was greeted by a composite smell of fried liver and bacon, brandy and water, and cigar smoke, pouring hospitably down to meet him through the crevices of the drawing-room door. When he got into the room, the first object that struck his eyes at one end of it, was Zack, with his hat on, vigorously engaged in freshening up the dusty carpet with a damp mop; and Mat, at the other, presiding over the frying-pan, with his coat off, his s.h.i.+rt sleeves rolled up to his shoulders, a gla.s.s of steaming hot grog on the chimney-piece above him, and a long pewter toasting-fork in his hand.
"Here"s the honored guest of the evening arrived before I"ve swabbed down the decks," cried Zack, jogging his friend in the ribs with the long handle of the mop.
"How are you, to-night?" said Mat, with familiar ease, not moving from the frying-pan, but getting his right hand free to offer to Mr. Blyth by taking the pewter toasting-fork between his teeth. "Sit down anywhere you like; and just holler through the crack in the floor, under the bearskins there, if you want anything out of the Bocker-shop, below."--("He means Tobacco when he says Bocker," interposed Zack, parenthetically.) "Can you set your teeth in a baked tater or two?"
continued Mat, tapping a small Dutch oven before the fire with his toasting-fork. "We"ve got you a lot of fizzin" hot liver and bacon to ease down the taters with what you call a relish. Nice and streaky, ain"t it?" Here the host of the evening stuck his fork into a slice of bacon, and politely pa.s.sed it over his shoulder for Mr. Blyth to inspect, as he stood bewildered in the middle of the room.
"Oh, delicious, delicious!" cried Valentine, smelling as daintily at the outstretched bacon as if it had been a nosegay. "Really, my dear sir--."
He said no more; for at that moment he tripped himself up upon one of some ten or a dozen bottle-corks which lay about on the carpet where he was standing. There is very little doubt, if Zack had not been by to catch him, that Mr. Blyth would just then have concluded his polite remarks on the bacon by measuring his full length on the floor.
"Why don"t you put him into a chair?" growled Mat, looking round reproachfully from the frying-pan, as Valentine recovered his erect position again with young Thorpe"s a.s.sistance.
"I was just going to swab up that part of the carpet when you came in,"
said Zack, apologetically, as he led Mr. Blyth to a chair.
"Oh don"t mention it," answered Valentine, laughing. "It was all my awkwardness."
He stopped abruptly again. Zack had placed him with his back to the fire, against a table covered with a large and dirty cloth which flowed to the floor, and under which, while he was speaking, he had been gently endeavoring to insinuate his legs. Amazement bereft him of the power of speech when, on succeeding in this effort, he found that his feet came in contact with a perfect hillock of empty bottles, oyster-sh.e.l.ls, and broken crockery, heaped under the table. "Good gracious me! I hope I"m doing no mischief!" exclaimed Valentine, as a miniature avalanche of oyster-sh.e.l.ls clattered down on his intruding foot, and a plump bottle with a broken neck rolled lazily out from under the table-cloth, and courted observation on the open floor.
"Kick about, dear old fellow, kick about as much as you please," cried Zack, seating himself opposite Mr. Blyth, and bringing down a second avalanche of oyster-sh.e.l.ls to encourage him. "The fact is, we are rather put to it for s.p.a.ce here, so we keep the cloth always laid for dinner, and make a temporary lumber-room of the place under the table. Rather a new idea that, I think--not tidy perhaps, but original and ingenious, which is much better."
"Amazingly ingenious!" said Valentine, who was now beginning to be amused as well as surprised by his reception in Kirk Street. "Rather untidy, perhaps, as you say, Zack; but new, and not disagreeable I suppose when you"re used to it. What I like about all this," continued Mr. Blyth, rubbing his hands cheerfully, and kicking into view another empty bottle, as he settled himself in his chair--"What I like about this is, that it"s so thoroughly without ceremony. Do you know I really feel at home already, though I never was here before in my life?--Curious, Zack, isn"t it?"
"Look out for the taters!" roared Mat suddenly from the fireplace.
Valentine started, first at the unexpected shout just behind him, next at the sight of a big truculently-k.n.o.bbed potato which came flying over his head, and was dexterously caught, and instantly deposited on the dirty table-cloth by Zack. "Two, three, four, five, six," continued Mat, keeping the frying-pan going with one hand, and tossing the baked potatoes with the other over Mr. Blyth"s head, in quick succession for young Thorpe to catch. "What do you think of our way of dis.h.i.+ng up potatoes in Kirk Street?" asked Zack in great triumph. "It"s a little sudden when you"re not used to it," stammered Valentine, ducking his head as each edible missile flew over him--"but it"s free and easy--it"s delightfully free and easy." "Ready there with your plates. The liver"s a coming," cried Mat in a voice of martial command, suddenly showing his great red-hot perspiring face at the table, as he wheeled round from the fire, with the hissing frying-pan in one hand and the long toasting-fork in the other. "My dear sir, I"m shocked to see you taking all this trouble," exclaimed Mr. Blyth; "do pray let me help you!" "No, I"m d.a.m.ned if I do," returned Mat with the most polite suavity and the most perfect good humor. "Let him have all the trouble, Blyth," said Zack; "let him help you, and don"t pity him. He"ll make up for his hard work, I can tell you, when he sets in seriously to his liver and bacon. Watch him when he begins--he bolts his dinner like the lion in the Zoological Gardens."
Mat appeared to receive this speech of Zack"s as a well-merited compliment, for he chuckled at young Thorpe and winked grimly at Valentine, as he sat down bare-armed to his own mess of liver and bacon.
It was certainly a rare and even a startling sight to see this singular man eat. Lump by lump, without one intervening morsel of bread, he tossed the meat into his mouth rather than put it there--turned it apparently once round between his teeth--and then voraciously and instantly swallowed it whole. By the time a quarter of Mr. Blyth"s plateful of liver and bacon, and half of Zack"s had disappeared, Mat had finished his frugal meal; had wiped his mouth on the back of his hand, and the back of his hand on the leg of his trousers; had mixed two gla.s.ses of strong hot rum-and-water for himself and Zack; and had set to work on the composition of a third tumbler, into which sugar, brandy, lemon-juice, rum, and hot water all seemed to drop together in such incessant and confusing little driblets, that it was impossible to tell which ingredient was uppermost in the whole mixture. When the tumbler was full, he set it down on the table, with an indicative bang, close to Valentine"s plate.
"Just try a toothful of that to begin with," said Mat. "If you like it, say Yes; if you don"t, say No; and I"ll make it better next time."
"You are very kind, very kind indeed," answered Mr. Blyth, eyeing the tumbler by his side with some little confusion and hesitation; "but really, though I should be shocked to appear ungrateful, I"m afraid I must own--Zack, you ought to have told your friend--"
"So I did," said Zack, sipping his rum-and-water with infinite relish.
"The fact is, my dear sir," continued Valentine, "I have the most wretched head in the world for strong liquor of any kind--"
"Don"t call it strong liquor," interposed Mat, emphatically tapping the rim of his guest"s tumbler with his fore-finger.
"Perhaps," pursued Mr. Blyth, with a polite smile, "I ought to have said grog."
"Don"t call it grog," retorted Mat, with two disputatious taps on the rim of the gla.s.s.
"Dear me!" asked Valentine, amazedly, "what is it then?"
"It"s Squaw"s Mixture," answered Mat, with three distinct taps of a.s.severation.
Mr. Blyth and Zack laughed, under the impression that their queer companion was joking with them. Mat looked steadily and sternly from one to the other; then repeated with the gruffest gravity--"I tell you, it"s Squaw"s Mixture."
"What a very curious name! how is it made?" asked Valentine.
"Enough Brandy to spile the Water. Enough Rum to spile the Brandy and Water. Enough Lemon to spile the Rum _and_ Brandy _and_ Water. Enough Sugar to spile everything. That"s "Squaw"s Mixture,"" replied Mat with perfect calmness and deliberation.
Zack began to laugh uproariously. Mat became more inflexibly grave than ever. Mr. Blyth felt that he was growing interested on the subject of the Squaw"s Mixture. He stirred it diffidently with his spoon, and asked with great curiosity how his host first learnt to make it.
"When I was out, over there, in the Nor"-West," began Mat, nodding towards the particular point of the compa.s.s that he mentioned.
"When he says Nor"-West, and wags his addled old head like that at the chimney-pots over the way, he means North America," Zack explained.
"When I was out Nor"-West," repeated Mat, heedless of the interruption, "working along with the exploring gang, our stock of liquor fell short, and we had to make the best of it in the cold with a spirt of spirits and a pinch of sugar, drowned in more hot water than had ever got down the throat of e"er a man of the lot of us before. We christened the brew "Squaw"s Mixture," because it was such weak stuff that even a woman couldn"t have got drunk on it if she tried. Squaw means woman in those parts, you know; and Mixture means--what you"ve got afore you now. I knowed you couldn"t stand regular grog, and that"s why I cooked it up for you. Don"t keep on stirring of it with a spoon like that, or you"ll stir it away altogether. Try it."
"Let _me_ try it--let"s see how weak it is," cried Zack, reaching over to Valentine.
"Don"t you go a-shoving of your oar into another man"s rollocks,"
said Mat, dexterously knocking Zack"s spoon out of his hand just as it touched Mr. Blyth"s tumbler. "You stick to _your_ grog; I"ll stick to _my_ grog; and _he"ll_ stick to Squaw"s Mixture." With those words, Mat leant his bare elbows on the table, and watched Valentine"s first experimental sip with great curiosity.
The result was not successful. When Mr. Blyth put down the tumbler, all the watery part of the Squaw"s Mixture seemed to have got up into his eyes, and all the spirituous part to have stopped short at his lungs. He shook his head, coughed, and faintly exclaimed--"Too strong."
"Too hot you mean?" said Mat.
"No, indeed," pleaded poor Mr. Blyth, "I really meant too strong."
"Try again," suggested Zack, who was far advanced towards the bottom of his own tumbler already. "Try again. Your liquor all went the wrong way last time."
"More sugar," said Mat, neatly tossing two lumps into the gla.s.s from where he sat. "More lemon (squeezing one or two drops of juice, and three or four pips, into the mixture). More water (pouring in about a tea-spoonful, with a clumsy flourish of the kettle). Try again."
"Thank you, thank you a thousand times. Really, do you know, it tastes much nicer now," said Mr. Blyth, beginning cautiously with a spoonful of the squaw"s mixture at a time.