The old black phone on the nightstand was coated with a dried up paste consisting of beer and dirt, speckled with Nacho Cheese Doritos dust. And right now Jake wanted to take a sledge hammer to it. Not because it was disgusting. No, thathe could live with. But the stupid thing wouldn"t quit ringing. He had no idea how many times it had already rung.
But his splitting headache discouraged any movement toward the phone. The mere blink of an eyelid might push him over the edge, he thought. And, oh how he wanted to avoid what happened last time, when it felt like a plumber was working his toilet plunger on Jake"s open mouth until it sucked out the previous night"s pepperoni pizza and beer, and sloshed it all over the floor.
He started counting the number of times his head throbbed between rings, wondering how much pressure the human skull could withstand. It felt like his was about to blow.
Had the old phone finally gone haywire? he wondered. No caller would let it ring that many times.
It had to stop.
"h.e.l.lo?" he said, choking back the barf.
"Jake? Are you okay?"
"Carnie?"
"Yeah. How are you feeling? You don"t sound too good."
"Well, let"s see. I"m 32, but right now I feel like I"m 102."
"Yikes."
"In fact, if this is what it feels like when you"re 102, I don"t want to live that long."
"I guess we had a little too much to drink last night."
"I don"t know how you were able to drive yourself home," said Jake.
"I didn"t have as much as you did."
"And why did you leave like that? You got me all lathered up and rock hard, and then you took off. I"m beginning to think you"re just a big tease."
"No, not at all. Next time, Baby. Next time for sure. But I realized we needed to talk about some things first."
"Why do women always want to talkeverything to death? Why not just do it, and talk about it later?"
"This is important, Jake. Do you remember telling me your big secret last night? And don"t say too much-somebody might be listening in."
Why had he told her? He knew why-because he had gotten drunk and stupid. "What about it?"
"I looked it up in the newspaper archives online and got all the details. But don"t worry. I won"t tell anybody."
"Good. Thank you."
"And you won"t tell anybody mysecret, right?"
It took him a couple of seconds to remember what she had proposed about forcing people to take part in a clinical trial. "Right. I won"t tell."
"And you"ll help me, right?"
"Now wait a minute. I told you I didn"t want any part of that."
"But you"ve changed your mind because you want to be sure I keep your secret."
Jake wondered how he had fallen into this trap. "Uh, yeah. Right."
"Good. I"ll drop by your house tonight at around 8:00. See you then, Honey."
"Bye."
Why hadn"t he gone with his gut feelings when he met her on Sunday night? He knew she was trouble. But her luscious body promised heaven, and her lurid eyes flickered with h.e.l.lfire. A s.e.xy bad girl was always hard for him to resist. So, he had gambled and lost. Again.
If he was lucky, maybe he could do this job without landing himself in jail...or the morgue.
It was Friday morning, and Elmo Mobley realized he had not spoken to his mother since Tuesday. He"d been working practically around the clock researching Alzheimer"s, hoping to find some brand new miracle treatment for her. But the hopelessness of the disease was beginning to sink in. He could not save his mother. No matter what he did, she would deteriorate into a pitiful state as she died a slow death. The most he could hope to do was prolong her current quality of life for a little while.
And although he could never make up for all their years of estrangement, he wanted to start spending as much time with her as possible. He loved Carsie, and had been excited about starting a new life with her, but it would be selfish of him to get married right now, he thought.
He decided to go up and have a heart-to-heart with Mallie Mae. She would be surprised to see him, since he rarely went upstairs. When he reached her room, the door was closed. He was about the knock, but then he heard Macy"s voice.
"Elmo"s still working in his study day and night," said Macy.
"I guess he loves me after all," said Mallie Mae.
"Guess so."
Elmo felt guilty about eavesdropping. He raised his hand to knock, but then hesitated when he heard Macy speaking again.
"But how long do we have to go on with this?" said Macy.
"As long as it takes."
"I don"t know if I can keep it up, Mallie Mae."
"Sure you can-if you really care about him."
Elmo knocked.
The conversation stopped.
After a few seconds, the door began to open and Macy said, "Well, I thought you were going to let her starve. Oh, Elmo. I thought you were Hadley, bringing breakfast. Sorry."
"Who is that man?" said Mallie Mae. She looked frightened.
"It"s Elmo," said Macy.
"Who?"
"Elmo. Your son," said Macy.
"Oh," said Mallie Mae. But she didn"t seem to understand.
Elmo motioned for Macy to follow him out into the hallway.
"Tomorrow we"re going to have a fun day together," said Elmo.
"Really? Doing what?" said Macy.
"I"m taking y"all to the Dallas Zoo."
"The zoo?" Macy looked confused.
"Yeah. Have you ever been?"
"No."
"You"re kidding. I can"t believe you"ve never been there. The TV commercial says it"s 95 acres of fun," said Elmo. "And it is. So, have her ready to go by 7:00 AM."
"But do you really think she should be going out in public in her condition?"
"Sure. She"ll be fine. It"ll be good for her," said Elmo.
"Well, okay then."
"Great. So, I"ve got to go make dinner reservations for tomorrow night."
"Where?"
"It"s a surprise. But you"re gonna love it," he said, as he walked away and went down the stairs.
As soon as he was out of sight, Macy walked back into the bedroom, closed the door, and rushed to Mallie Mae"s bed.
"What"s gotten in to him?" said Macy.
"What did he say?"
"He"s taking us to the Dallas Zoo tomorrow."
"What?"
"And then to some fancy restaurant for dinner. We"re going to be with him all day. He"s going to figure it out. He"ll see that you"re just faking. I should tell him you"re not feeling well enough to make the trip."
"No. This is good. If I can convince him that I really amin bad shape, maybe he"ll go ahead and dump his fiancee. He"s feeling so guilty about being mean to me for all those years that he"ll want to spend every waking minute with me until the day I die."
"But you don"t want to have to keep faking Alzheimer"s forever. And what"s going to happen when you finally tell him the truth?"
"I"ll cross that bridge when I come to it, Dear."
That"s going to be an awfully tall bridge, thought Macy.
"h.e.l.lo?"
"Johnny, this is Elmo. I"m surprised I caught you in your office."
"Hey, Elmo. Yeah, I was just about to see my first patient. How"s it going with your mother?"
"That"s what I called you about. I"ve got a hypothetical for you."
"Shoot."
"Suppose somebody was trying to fakehaving Alzheimer"s disease and they came to you for a diagnosis. Could they fool you?" said Elmo.
"Well, yeah, in theory. The only way to know for sure whether someone has Alzheimer"s is to look for plaques and tangles in the brain tissue. And you can only do that after the patient dies, in autopsy.
"So, I run blood tests and brain scans to rule out other causes of the symptoms, and I talk to the patient about general health, past medical problems, and the ability to perform everyday activities. Then I give memory tests, and check language and counting skills. So, a person could lie about how he"s feeling, and he could deliberately blow the language and memory tests, and other tests, I suppose. But why would anybody wantto?"
"Okay, thanks, Johnny. Bye."
"Whoa, don"t leave me hanging. What"s going on?"
"I"m sorry. I just didn"t want to tie you up any longer. I know you"ve got patients waiting on you."
"They"re used to it. Now, what"s this about?"
"I think Mallie Mae"s faking."
"Why do you think that?"
"I overheard her talking to Macy this morning."
"Macy"s the one who brought your mother to my office, right?"
"That"s right. I heard mother saying that she and Macy would have to keep doing somethingas long as it takes. And when Macy expressed doubt that she could keep it up, my mother a.s.sured her that she could, if she really cared about me."
"That"s interesting. Just how much doesMacy care about you?" said Johnny.
"That"s not the point. I think Mallie Mae is faking so I"ll feel guilty and call off my wedding."
"Oh."
"I"ve already postponed it because of her. You know how she loves to interfere with my life. Remember how she drove me crazy when we were in medical school?"
"Yes, I do. So, maybe she isfaking. But how are you going to prove it?"