"This thing stinks," he said.
"You"ll get used to it."
"Smells like your buddyused it to haul dead fish."
"My buddy isa dead fish."
Jake didn"t want to know what she was talking about, so he shut up.
Carnie pulled into the Wal-Mart parking lot.
"Now, how are we going to pick up women here?" said Jake. "There"s a guard driving around the parking lot."
"That guy on the little electric golf cart?"
"Yeah. He may be old, and he probably doesn"t even have a gun, but all he has to do is dial 911 and we"re in big trouble."
"He"s not gonna be a problem." Carnie parked the van.
"Here he comes."
"Watch this," she said, as she stepped out of the van.
She waved to the guard as he approached.
He saw her, and drove to where she was standing. "Do you need help, Ma"am? Dead battery? Flat tire?"
"No, I"m fine, thank you. I just wanted to tell you I"m meeting both of my grandmothers here and taking them out for a fancy dinner. They think they"re coming to help me pick out some material for drapes. In fact, neither of them knows the other"s coming."
"I see."
"I hope that"s okay. Because I know we"re really not supposed to do that. You"re only supposed to park here if you"re shopping at Wal-Mart."
The old guard smiled. "Well, Honey, don"t worry. It"ll just be our little secret." He winked at her.
"Oh, you"re wonderful. Thanks so much."
"No problem. Have a nice time with your grandmothers." He drove away.
"Well, at least everything"s out of the truck," said Greg.
"Sorry about your garage," said Beverly to her daughter. "I didn"t realize I had so much stuff."
"That"s okay, Mom," said Cynthia. "I don"t mind parking my car outside for a while."
"Y"all getting hungry?" said Greg.
"I could eat a horse," said Beverly.
"What did you have in mind, Sweetie?" said Cynthia to Greg. "I"m pretty grungy. I don"t think I"d want to go out to eat."
"Why don"t we order pizza?" said Greg.
They agreed on a large pepperoni, and Greg pulled out his cell phone and walked out of the room to call in their order.
"Honey, would you mind helping me with my hair in the morning?" said Beverly.
"Sure, Mom."
"I want it to fix it up nice for church. So, I really need to wash it tonight. When we finish eating I"ll run down to Wal-Mart and get some more of my shampoo."
"You don"t need to go out tonight. I have shampoo."
"No, Honey, there"s a special brand I use. It"s the only kind that works right for me."
"Okay. I"ll go with you," said Cynthia.
"Oh, don"t be silly. You just said you were too grungy to go out."
"But I hate for you to go out alone at night-"
"-now wait a second. If I had known you were going to treat me like a child when I moved in with you, I would have just stayed in Marshall."
"Alright, fine. Go by yourself."
"That"s more like it," said Beverly.
They both smiled. This living together thing would take some work, but they knew they could do it.
Chapter25.
"Didn"t you forget a couple of things at the house?" said Jake.
"Nope. We"ve got everything we need," said Carnie.
They were sitting in the stolen van at Wal-Mart, waiting for their first victim.
"What about the knife? You were going use it to scare them and make them get in the van? And you forgot the gun. I was supposed to point it at them to keep them quiet. We better go back. We can do this some other night."
"Look in the glove box," said Carnie.
Jake twisted the latch and opened the glove box, and a light came on inside.
"Hey, ain"t this myscrewdriver?"
He examined it. "What"s this red stuff on the handle? Blood? Don"t tell me you killed somebody when you stole this van?"
"Of course not. That"s probably red paint. Quit getting so freaked out about nothing."
"And this ain"t yourgun, is it? I can"t believe I got myself into this mess."
Carnie grabbed his shirt collar and got in his face. "Do you want to go to prison?"
"No."
"Then shut up and settle down. Otherwise we"re gonna get caught."
She grabbed the two weapons and handed the gun to Jake.
He studied the gun a few seconds, and then said, "You"re not so smart."
"What do you mean by that?"
"You gave methe gun, and you just have a screwdriver."
"So, what? You"re gonna shoot me? You think you just might shoot me? Well, go ahead. If you"re gonna do it, do it now, Jake!"
Jake thought seriously about shooting her, but he couldn"t pull the trigger. He wasn"t a killer. The one person he didkill was by accident-it wasn"t murder.
"Do it, Jake! Go ahead and kill me!"
She reached out and clamped her hands around Jake"s hand, forcing him to point the gun directly at her chest. Then she latched onto Jake"s trigger finger with both of her thumbs and began to squeeze.
"No! Stop!" He couldn"t point the gun away from her, and he couldn"t stop her from making him pull the trigger.
The gun clicked.
Carnie started laughing as she released Jake"s hand. "You fool-you think I would actually kill myself?"
"Don"t do that to me! And why did you unload it?"
"Look, Jake, what if you were holding the gun on the old women and you accidentally shot one of them? You"re already worried about going to prison for your hit and run. How do you feel about lethal injection?"
The look of fear on his face gave the answer.
"Okay, so I will escort each lady into the van. And you will point the gun at them to keep them quiet and make sure they don"t try to escape. Any questions?"
"No."
Carnie looked toward the store to see who was coming out. "Look, Jake. See that old woman walking out by herself?"
"Yeah."
"She looks like a fine candidate," said Carnie. She got out of the van and put the screwdriver in her left hand upside down to conceal the blade behind her arm.
The woman was carrying two plastic bags in her left hand, and was holding her keys in her right hand. Carnie wondered where her purse was. Maybe she had her driver"s license and credit card in a pocket.
"Ma"am, please be careful out here," said Carnie when she was fifteen feet away.
The woman seemed confused.
At a distance of five feet, Carnie said, "Be careful. The guard told me somebody reported a purse s.n.a.t.c.hing tonight."
"What guard?"
"That guy who rides around the parking lot in the golf cart."
"Oh. And it happened here? Tonight?"
Carnie was standing two feet from the woman.
"Well, I didn"t even bring my purse with me."
Carnie laughed. "So, you outsmarted the guy."
"I guess I did." The woman smiled.
"I"m Carnie. What"s your name?"
"Harriet."
Carnie put her hands behind her and transferred the screwdriver to her right hand. Then she put her left arm around Harriet.
"Harriet, I have a favor to ask."
"What"s that?"
"I need you to come with me, and not make a sound, okay?"
"Oh. I"m sorry, but I need to get home."
Carnie whipped out the large screwdriver.
Harriet gasped.
"Just act normal and do exactly as I say."
Carnie walked her to the van, opened the sliding door, and told her to get in the back seat.
Harriet flinched when she saw the big man in the front seat pointing the gun at her.