I nodded glumly. "I forgot to cover the facts. They"d called all the bright boys out and collected them under one special-study roof. I majored in mechanical ingenuity not psi. Hoped to get a D. Ing. out of it, at least, but had to stop. Partly because I"m not ingenious enough and partly because I ran out of cash."
Doctor Thornd.y.k.e nodded. "I know how it is," he said. I realized that he was leading me away from the main subject gently, but I couldn"t see how to lead him back without starting another verbal ha.s.sle. He had me cold.
He could dig my mind and get the best way to lead me away, while I couldn"t read his. I gave up. It felt better, too, getting my mind off this completely baffling puzzle even for a moment. He caught my thoughts but his face didn"t twitch a bit as he picked up his narrative smoothly:
"I didn"t make it either," he said unhappily. "I"m psi and good. But I"m telepath and not esper. I weasled my way through pre-med and medical by main force and awkwardness, so to speak." He grinned at me sheepishly.
"I"m not much different than you or any other psi. The espers all think that perception is superior to the ability to read minds, and vice versa. I was going to show "em that a telepath can make Scholar of Medicine. So I "pathed my way through med by reading the minds of my fellows, who were all good espers. I got so good that I could read the mind of an esper watching me do a delicate dissecting job, and move my hands according to his perception. I could diagnose the deep ills with the best of them--so long as there was an esper in the place."
"So what tripped you up?"
"Telepaths make out best dealing with people. Espers do better with things."
"Isn"t medicine a field that deals with people?"
He shook his head. "Not when a headache means spinal tumor, or indigestion, or a bad cold. "Doctor," says the patient, "I"ve a bad ache along my left side just below the ribs," and after you diagnose, it turns out to be acute appendicitis. You see, Steve, the patient doesn"t know what"s wrong with him. Only the symptoms. A telepath can follow the patient"s symptoms perfectly, but it takes an esper to dig in his guts and perceive the tumor that"s pressing on the spine or the striae on his liver."
"Yeah."
"So I flopped on a couple of tests that the rest of the cla.s.s sailed through, just because I was not fast enough to read their minds and put my own ability to work. It made "em suspicious and so here I am, a mere doctor instead of a scholar."
"There are fields for you, I"m sure."
He nodded. "Two. Psychiatry and psychology, neither of which I have any love for. And medical research, where the ability to grasp another doctor or scholar"s plan, ideas and theories is slightly more important than the ability to dig esper into the experiments."
"Don"t see that," I said with a shake of my head.
"Well, Steve, let"s take Mekstrom"s Disease, for instance."
"Let"s take something simple. What I know about Mekstrom"s Disease could be carved on the head of a pin with a blunt b.u.t.ter knife."
"Let"s take Mekstrom"s. That"s my chance to make Scholar of Medicine, Steve, if I can come up with an answer to one of the minor questions.
I"ll be in the clinical laboratory where the only cases present are those rare cases of Mekstrom"s. The other doctors, espers every one of them, and the scholars over them, will dig the man"s body right down to the last cell, looking and combing--you know some of the better espers can actually dig into the const.i.tuency of a cell?--but I"ll be the doctor who can collect all their information, correlate it, and maybe come up with an answer."
"You picked a dilly," I told him.
It was a real one, all right. Otto Mekstrom had been a mechanic-tech at White Sands s.p.a.ce Station during the first flight to Venus, Mars and Moon round-trip with landings. About two weeks after the ship came home, Otto Mekstrom"s left fingertips began to grow hard. The hardening crawled up slowly until his hand was like a rock. They studied him and worked over him and took all sorts of samples and made all sorts of tests until Otto"s forearm was as hard as his hand. Then they amputated at the shoulder.
But by that time, Otto Mekstrom"s toes on both feet were getting solid and his other hand was beginning to show signs of the same. On one side of the creepline the flesh was soft and normal, but on the other it was all you could do to poke a sharp needle into the skin. Poor Otto ended up a basket case, just in time to have the d.a.m.ned stuff start all over again at the stumps of his arms and legs. He died when hardening reached his vitals.
Since that day, some twenty-odd years ago, there had been about thirty cases a year turn up. All fatal, despite amputations and everything else known to modern medical science. G.o.d alone knew how many unfortunate human beings took to suicide without contacting the big Medical Research Center at Marion, Indiana.
Well, if Thornd.y.k.e could uncover something, no one could claim that a telepath had no place in medicine. I wished him luck.
I did not see Thornd.y.k.e again in that hospital. They released me the next day and then I had nothing to do but to chew my fingernails and wonder what had happened to Catherine.
III
I"d rather not go into the next week and a half in detail. I became known as the bridegroom who lost his bride, and between the veiled accusations and the half-covered snickers, life was pretty miserable. I talked to the police a couple-three times, first as a citizen asking for information and ending up as a complainant against party or parties unknown. The latter got me nowhere. Apparently the police had more lines out than the Grand Bank fishing fleet and were getting no more nibbles than they"d get in the Dead Sea. They admitted it; the day had gone when the police gave out news reports that an arrest was expected hourly, meaning that they were baffled. The police, with their fine collection of psi boys, were willing to admit when they were really baffled. I talked to telepaths who could tell me what I"d had for breakfast on the day I"d entered pre-school cla.s.ses, and espers who could sense the color of the clothing I wore yesterday. I"ve a poor color-esper, primitive so to speak. These guys were good, but no matter how good they were, Catherine Lewis had vanished as neatly as Ambrose Bierce.
I even read Charles Fort, although I have no belief in the supernatural, and rather faint faith in the Hereafter. And people who enter the Hereafter leave their remains behind for evidence.
Having to face Catherine"s mother and father, who came East to see me, made me a complete mental wreck.
It is harder than you think to face the parents of a woman you loved, and find that all you can tell them is that somehow you fouled your drive, cracked up, and lost their daughter. Not even dead-for-sure.
Death, I think, we all could have faced. But this uncertainty was something that gnawed at the soul"s roots and left it rotting.
To stand there and watch the tears in the eyes of a woman as she asks you, "But can"t you remember, son?" is a little too much, and I don"t care to go into details.
The upshot of it was, after about ten days of lying awake nights and wondering where she was and why. Watching her eyes peer out of a metal casting at me from a position sidewise of my head. Nightmares, either the one about us turning over and over and over, or Mrs. Lewis pleading with me only to tell her the truth. Then having the police inform me that they were marking this case down as "unexplained." I gave up. I finally swore that I was going to find her and return with her, or I was going to join her in whatever strange, unknown world she had entered.
The first thing I did was to go back to the hospital in the hope that Dr. Thornd.y.k.e might be able to add something. In my unconscious ramblings there might be something that fell into a pattern if it could be pieced together.
But this was a failure, too. The hospital super was sorry, but Dr.
Thornd.y.k.e had left for the Medical Research Center a couple of days before. Nor could I get in touch with him because he had a six-week interim vacation and planned a long, slow jaunt through Yellowstone, with neither schedule nor forwarding addresses.
I was standing there on the steps hoping to wave down a cruising coptercab when the door opened and a woman came out. I turned to look and she recognized me. It was Miss Farrow, my former nurse.
"Why, Mr. Cornell, what are you doing back here?"
"Mostly looking for Thornd.y.k.e. He"s not here."
"I know. Isn"t it wonderful, though? He"ll get his chance to study for his scholarte now."
I nodded glumly. "Yeah," I said. It probably sounded resentful, but it is hard to show cheer over the good fortune of someone else when your own world has come unglued.
"Still hoping," she said. It was a statement and not a question.
I nodded slowly. "I"m hoping," I said. "Someone has the answer to this puzzle. I"ll have to find it myself. Everyone else has given up."
"I wish you luck," said Miss Farrow with a smile. "You certainly have the determination."
I grunted. "It"s about all I have. What I need is training. Here I am, a mechanical engineer, about to tackle the job of a professional detective and tracer of missing persons. About all I know about the job is what I have read. One gets the idea that these writers must know something of the job, the way they write about it. But once you"re faced with it yourself, you realize that the writer has planted his own clues."
Miss Farrow nodded. "One thing," she suggested, "have you talked to the people who got you out from under your car yet?"
"No, I haven"t. The police talked to them and claimed they knew nothing.
I doubt that I can ask them anything that the police have not satisfied themselves about."
Miss Farrow looked up at me sidewise. "You won"t find anything by asking people who have never heard of you."
"I suppose not."
A coptercab came along at that moment, and probably sensing my intention, he gave his horn a tap. I"d have liked to talk longer with Miss Farrow, but a cab was what I wanted, so with a wave I took it and she went on down the steps to her own business.