Chapter 401: The Truths She Did Not Know Of (5)
Translator: Atlas Studios Editor: Atlas Studios
s.h.i.+ Guang was trying her best to repress her emotions by gripping her fists tightly. However, her body was still shaking in an uncontrollable s.h.i.+ver.
Her voice was light as though it was just floating out. “I want to go look for him. I want to ask him what I said to him that night…”
If it were only the words of Mo Jin, he most likely wouldn’t have been so firm on his decision. She was certain that she must have said more to him, only that she could not remember them.
“How about asking him tomorrow? Look at the way you are now…” Mo Jin reached out carefully, wanting to grab at her arm. “I’m sorry, s.h.i.+ Guang…”
s.h.i.+ Guang lifted her arm coldly to dodge her. Wiping her tears and sniffing in, she asked, “Do you think that… I look like I can wait?”
Right now, her emotions were all over the place—she did not know how to face Mo Jin.
Between right and wrong, things were never just black and white. The only thought on her mind right now was to go see Lu Yanchen.
“Mo Jin, perhaps the liking that I first spoke of was not completely pure. However, I really did like him and wanted to be together with him. Even after two years, I still like him so much, love him. Even if I don’t want to admit to it, even if I feel like I should have hated him and get as far as possible from him, I still could not control my heart. When he spoke of marriage, I really could not get him at all, neither did I know what he was trying to do. He clearly did not like me, and yet he wanted to marry me. And after we were really married together, I thought to myself, ‘Fine, let’s just torture one another then. It’s not as though I would fall in love with another man in this lifetime anyways.’ But in the end…”
She choked out with a breath. “But today, you’re telling me that everything I had a.s.sumed in the past was all wrong. He wasn’t the one who had let me down… it was me. It wasn’t that he didn’t want me anymore… it was because I had hurt him. I really am the trash girl that Chu Mubei was talking about. Do you still think that I can just sit here calmly?”
After saying that, s.h.i.+ Guang truly could not hold it in any longer as she bawled out. Her heart was being minced as blood dripped down everywhere…
Mo Jin’s eyes reddened as well. “s.h.i.+ Guang, I’m sorry…”
What’s the use of being sorry?
At the same time, that sorry didn’t seem that important anymore. To be able to find someone who could love her truly in this lifetime and would hold on even if it meant hurting himself, the most important thing was to grab hold of him firmly.
s.h.i.+ Guang no longer wanted to say anything more as she turned around and left in hasty steps. She pressed for the lift, but it remained downstairs, refusing to come up.
A sense of irrepressible frustration surged through her. Feeling somewhat impatient, she decided to take the stairs instead.
Level after level, she huffed out as her mind flashed with images of him breaking up with her back then.
“Who was the one who had called me over to fetch her last night? Also, who was the one who had hugged me tightly begging me not to stop? You had your fair share of pleasure last night as well.”
The way he had looked while saying that was thoroughly cold and merciless. However, was his heart in the same coldness as well?
She thought that he was trash, but he probably thought that she was even tras.h.i.+er for playing with his feelings.
He said that he was ‘tired’.
It wasn’t that he was tired of her, he was tired of being used by her as a tool of revenge!
He thought that she did not like him, and was merely using him as a tool to take revenge against Yang Sitong!
For a man with so much pride, how could that have not hurt?
She was in pain? He should be the one in even deeper pain than her!
The way he had looked at her at the prize-distribution ceremony two years later, it was as though he was looking at a stranger on the streets. But, if he were really taking her as just a mere stranger, why would he just be showing her an exceptional coldness?
She begrudged him, hated him, blamed him, and wished that she had never ever known him.
But he… should have been feeling the same…