She narrowed her gaze. "You look like the Carter I know but you don"t sound like him." She knew his situation with Carole had to have changed how he viewed life, but considering how he"d treated Micki in the past, she wasn"t about to give him the benefit of the doubt so easily.
"I don"t blame you for hating me. I just wanted to say I was sorry and maybe one day we can get past it and be friends?"
She nodded warily. "Apology accepted." She"d been taught manners, after all. "As for the future, you"ll understand if I reserve judgment"
"Fair enough." He started to walk away and paused. "I really am trying to turn over a new leaf. Even if that paternity test doesn"t name me--"
"You took the test already?" Micki asked, stunned.
"We sure did, though it takes two weeks to get the results."
"I see."
She knew Damian had gone to Florida with Carter but she hadn"t known the result of their discussion. She certainly had no idea they"d all taken tests. Because she hadn"t returned his calls, Micki thought. Instead she"d had her secretary keep her up to date on anything Damian needed professionally, and there"d been nothing. So how could she have known?
"Well good luck. I hope things turn out the way you want them to."
He inclined his head. "Thanks for that"
He walked away, leaving Micki alone with her ice water and stuffy nose. Her head hurt badly. As long as things here were under control, she might as well tell Sophie she was heading home.
Micki looked around for her sister and finally spotted her red dress across the room. She started toward Sophie when a firm hand on her shoulder stopped her.
"Going somewhere?" Damian asked.
Micki stepped back and looked into his dark gaze. "I didn"t realize you"d be here."
"Why not? All the Renegades were on the invitation list."
She shrugged. "I know. I just thought...you wouldn"t be in the mood for a party." "I"m not. But (a) it"s for a good cause, (b) you put the event together and (c) I knew you"d be here. Any one of those reasons works for me."
His grin turned her insides into a mushy mess. "Well thanks for coming but I was just leaving."
His smile quickly faded. "Why the rush? I was hoping to talk to you."
As much as she"d love to spend more time with him, Micki had already decided to protect her heart. "I"m not feeling well. Why don"t you call me?"
"Because you don"t answer my messages. Come on, one dance. We"ll talk and then you can go home and take care of that cold," he said, his voice gruff and just short of pleading.
Before she could reply, he grabbed her hand and led her out to the dance floor. He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her toward him, his body flush with hers.
Her back tingled where his palm rested. "You don"t want to get too close. You"ll catch my cold."
"I"m not worried. So how"s your uncle doing?" he asked, his breath warm against her ear. His body moved in a graceful glide around the dance floor, sweeping her along with him.
"He"s fine. Driving people in the rehab place nuts but he shouldn"t be out of commission too long."
Damian nodded. "That"s good. I"ll get by to see him this week."
"He"d like that."
"And the merger?" he whispered the private words so no one else could overhear.
She shook her head. "Slow as you"d expect with Spence and Uncle Yank pulling from opposite ends. They"ll run up hefty lawyer bills but it"ll get done."
He chuckled, the low rumble of laughter in his chest reverberating against her. "And his eyesight?"
"He doesn"t complain. He never did. I think he"s too busy hiding how he really feels."
Damian raised his hand, still in a brace. "I can definitely relate to his situation," he muttered.
"Any improvement?" she asked, gently touching his hand.
"Not considering how long it"s been immobilized. I"ve had some physical therapy, too. It"s August and the play-offs are in sight for September. I just don"t know if I"ll be playing in them." He sounded resigned but more accepting than she"d heard him before. She wondered what, if anything, had changed in his mind but decided not to ask. She couldn"t keep her distance if she let herself get wrapped up in his emotions.
They continued to move together in rhythm. He intertwined his fingers with hers and pulled her hand tighter against his chest. The gesture felt intimate somehow and, despite herself, Micki trembled.
"We took the paternity tests," Damian said, breaking the silence.
She nodded. "Carter told me."
"I"d have told you myself if you"d returned my calls. Carole is not happy. For some reason I can"t fathom, she wants this kid to be mine."
"Good genes?" She strove for a lighthearted laugh.
"All I care about is whether you like what"s in my jeans." He treated her to the s.e.xy wink she adored.
"Maybe that"s the problem," she murmured. "I like it too much."
His heartbeat slow and steady, both soothing and arousing, reminded her of all she couldn"t have. Suddenly she jerked away from his warm body and solid hold, not caring if she drew attention, just needing to escape from all that she could never really have.
"We had our one last time," she said. Then Micki ran for the door before she changed her mind and indulged in another.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN.
THE MINUTES OF THE CLOCK on the doctor"s office wall ticked slowly by. Damian had met Carter and Carole at the office for the paternity results and they all sat in the cramped Manhattan s.p.a.ce, none saying a word.
Damian hadn"t seen Carole since their last discussion in Florida. Since Carter had taken it on himself to make her travel plans and pick her up at the airport, Damian had stepped aside. The other man deserved a shot at proving himself to the woman he obviously loved. Carole shot him daggers with her not-so-subtle glares and Damian figured she was royally p.i.s.sed because he"d allowed Carter to take over.
Well, h.e.l.l. The two of them had a strange relationship but d.a.m.ned if he"d stand in the way. Once Carole got over her obsession with Damian, she"d see Carter had potential. Damian glanced at the clock and wondered if the results would let him walk away and leave these two to figure out their relationship or if he"d forever be the obstacle between them. He rubbed his hands together--the brace was now for bedtime only--and realized his palms were sweating. A sure sign of nerves. How could he not be stressed when his mind was juggling thoughts of his career and possible fatherhood. And then there was Micki...
All of which added up to Damian"s mental and physical exhaustion. He hadn"t been sleeping well at night. Nighttime was the worst because then not only was he concerned about his injured hand and the daily workout routines--which hadn"t been as productive as he"d have liked--but thoughts of Micki surfaced and wouldn"t leave him alone.
She haunted his nights in ways no woman ever had. With two major problems in his life, he found himself wanting to discuss his options with Micki. He wanted to hear her tell him that he would make a good father because when she said it, he believed. When he gave himself a pep talk, it was Micki"s voice he heard, rea.s.suring him and convincing him he could be a better man.
No woman had ever made him want to be a better man before.
"Are you all ready?" Dr. Kernan joined them, walking into his private office and interrupting Damian"s thoughts.
Carole rose to her feet. In her high heels and skirt, she was the woman he remembered, dressed to impress. But he noticed that her suit jacket was b.u.t.toned over her skirt, leading him to believe she no longer had the flat abdomen he remembered.
At the thought, his stomach cramped badly.
"Frankly, Doctor, I think we wasted your time. I already know that Damian is the father and I"m so sorry time was taken away from your other patients to inform us of something we already knew." She shot the other man a pleading glance.
For a brief second, Damian almost felt sorry for her but then he remembered the h.e.l.l he"d been living with ever since her announcement and her deliberate omission of Carter"s part in her life.
Rick placed an arm around her shoulder and, though she stiffened, she didn"t pull away. "Babe, you need to face the truth. It"s a c.r.a.pshoot.Fifty-fifty. Doc?" he asked, turning to the older man.
Dr. Kernan glanced at the folder in his hand. "As I explained the day we did the test, I extracted the fetal cells from the mother"s blood sample and compared blood types to both possible fathers."
"As I said--" Carole began, but Carter cut her off.
"What do the results show?" he asked.
Damian held his breath. The doctor met Damian"s gaze, "I can guarantee you one hundred percent, you are not nor can you possibly be the baby"s father."
Damian blinked, certain he"d heard incorrectly.
"That"s not possible," Carole said, her voice trembling with pure fear.
Her reaction a.s.sured Damian he hadn"t misunderstood. "Not mine?" he asked.
The doctor who"d delivered all of his sisters" children walked over and put a hand on Damian"s shoulder. "Not yours" he said, loud and clear.
Damian forced air into his lungs. It wasn"t easy and he realized he was dizzy. He rubbed his forehead.
"What are you saying?" Carole asked.
Damian glanced at Carter whose face was flushed red. The other man hadn"t asked if he was the father. Carole might claim that she"d only been with both men, but Damian couldn"t help questioning that. Carter wanted this baby and a life with Carole, for better or for worse, Damian thought wryly. Would the rookie be disappointed in life yet again? At least he couldn"t blame Damian this time.
He drew a deep breath and rose before the doctor could announce the next set of results. "I think this is where I take my leave." Damian turned to his teammate. "Good luck," he said and, avoiding Carole"s gaze, he headed for the door.
He didn"t want to be around to witness either Carter"s triumph or his humiliation.
It wasn"t his business. Not anymore.
Carole"s hands shook as Damian walked out the door without sparing her a glance. He disappeared along with her hopes and dreams for a solid future for herself and her baby. It wasn"t that she couldn"t support herself. She could. She always had. And it wasn"t that she was in love with the man. If love were the sole criterion for security, she"d la.s.so Carter and marry him today.
The doctor stood before them, that d.a.m.ning folder in his hand.
"So it"s a done deal?" Carter asked. "It"s mine?"
A wave of dizziness swept over her and she lowered herself into the nearest chair. The doctor came up behind her and eased her head down slowly until it rested between her legs.
"Easy" Dr. Kernan said. "Just stay in this position for a bit."
"Are you okay?" Rick leaned down beside her. "I already told you we"ll get through this together and that was before Damian was out of the picture. We"re gonna be fine, babe " he said in a rea.s.suring voice. A lump rose in her throat. Carter"s words only made her feel that much worse. The poor man had too much faith in her, Carole thought. She didn"t deserve for him to love her. She didn"t deserve for him to care.
It didn"t matter that she"d learned her lesson about chasing fantasy instead of reality. It didn"t matter that she"d learned the hard, way she should have valued herself and her body enough to hold out for a man who truly cared instead of settling for sc.r.a.ps from the big stars.
She"d sacrificed her self-respect long ago. After watching Damian walk out of the room, she now promised herself to start fresh. She"d make a life for herself and her baby and it"d be a better one than her mother had been able to give her. There"d be no men wandering through at all hours and there"d be nourishing meals on the table. She"d see to it.
Though her heart pounded in her chest, she was starting to regain her composure. Carole slowly lifted her head. "Let"s do this," she said, wanting the official announcement over with.
Dr. Kernan flipped his folder closed. "Congratulations " he said, his gaze meeting Carter"s. "You"re the proud father-to-be."
"Woo hoo!" Carter pumped his fist in the air and the doctor laughed. "So is it a boy or girl?" Carter asked.
Dr. Kernan slapped Carter on the back. "I know you"re excited but why don"t we ask the mother whether she wants to know the s.e.x?"
Carole was still focusing on taking deep breaths and trying mentally to get herself and her life in order. She was going to be the mother of Carter"s child, and she was going to be a mother who set a fine example for her...
"What is it?" she asked the doctor.
"You"re having a girl. Congratulations."
A broad grin spread across Carter"s face as De. Kernan shook first his hand, then Carole"s.
"You folks have been through a lot. I"d urge you to get some old-fashioned family counseling for the baby"s sake if not your own. I can recommend some names if you"d like. Think about it and get back to me." He placed his pen into the pocket of his white coat. "In the meantime, good luck. I suggest you contact an OB of your choice and begin regular appointments if you haven"t already," he said, his gaze focused on hers.
"Thank you," she murmured, embarra.s.sed at how she"d been behaving, mortified at insisting Damian was the father when she knew he might not be. The doctor nodded and walked toward the door. "Feel free to use my office for a bit if you need to," he said and strode out, leaving Carole and Carter alone.
"I always thought I"d have a boy," Carter said, still in shock at all of Dr. Kernan"s revelations. His kid. His baby girl.
"Are you disappointed?"
For the first time, Carter heard uncertainty in Carole"s voice and fear underlying her words. "Not disappointed. Surprised. Excited. Anxious, too," he admitted.
"Yeah. Well I think we both are." She paused and glanced down. "It wasn"t that I didn"t want you to be the father."
"Yeah it was." But to his surprise, he wasn"t bitter. "In an odd way I get it. Fuller has money and prestige and with him you wouldn"t have to worry about anything:"
She swallowed hard. "I was stupid. Up until the last second, I was an idiot. First of all, you should know that my job is a good one with decent benefits. We"ll be okay."
"Babe, I have enough faith in myself for both of us. I"ll go through arbitration and make good money. My stats this year have been phenomenal. My agent"s sure things"ll go well. By the time I"m up for free agency--"
She rose to her feet. "I can"t count on you to support us. Baseball"s uncertain. Look at Damian. He hasn"t played in weeks. You can"t know what"s going to happen."
Carter knew her past and fear of living on welfare were behind her words, not a deliberate desire to hurt him. "I"ve learned that life doesn"t come with guarantees. But I can promise to try and do my best by you both. And I will."
A tear dripped down her cheek. "You"ve become a really good guy. You deserve so much better than me."