"Oh," he said, shrugging. "Too d.a.m.n bad. Would have liked to try you, Trudy Burke."
"I"m flattered beyond the telling, m"lord," Trudy said dryly. "Well, shall we settle Sir Kethrommon in his suite now, Mr. Jacobs? Perhaps you would like some dinner, m"lord?"
"Screw dinner." Kethrommon said, "There any women for RHUUM SERVICE 95 hire at this d.a.m.n hotel? Bigger ones than Trudy Burke here, I mean. Not so fragile looking." Kethrommon grinned. "Been a long trip for me, heh."
"I"ll have the hotel"s concierge contact you to arrange things," Trudy said, her expression carefully bland. "I"m sure they"ll have someone well worth your time. You might also try the neural net."
"Heh," Kethrommon said. "Maybe I will, both. You don"t like, eh, Trudy Burke?"
"It"s none of my concern, m"lord. Really."
"But you don"t like. Know what, Trudy Burke? You got s.p.u.n.k. I love s.p.u.n.k!"
The opening rounds of talks between the trade representa- tives of the Kingdom of Bloxx and the Rhuum Industrial Or- ganization got under way the following morning with as much appropriate pomp and ceremony as Jacobs and Burke could quickly arrange with Hotel Andromeda"s hospitality staff.
After the courtesy robots withdrew, Jacobs and Trudy took seats at opposite ends of the long, large mahogany conference table traditionally used in such negotiations, while Sir Kethrommon sat directly across from Chaylaifa. The table was bare of everything but writing implements and note paper; in keeping with Rhuum ways, there was not even water. The size of the table seemed excessive for so few people, but Jacobs was betting that an old hand like Chaylaifa would appreciate the im- plied status it gave him, and he was right; Chaylaifa broke into an undiplomatic grin when he first saw it The twenty-three members of the Rhuum negotiating staff sat in a gallery well be- hind their chief; meir only job was to lend their presence to these proceedings. Chaylaifa"s wife and daughter sat with them in the front row.
The first five minutes of the meeting were spent in ex- changing formal pleasantries. Chaylaifa was, predictably, good at it widi the skill of long experience. Kethrommon, not so predictably, quickly proved himself capable of delivering a rough yet effective and endearing presentation capable of charming even his most formal listener.
Jacobs accessed the net. You there, Trudy?
She answered immediately. Sure I am, hon. Hey, is this guy good, or what? Not only does he seem undamaged after last 96 Brad Ferguson night"s antics*--and I"ve seen the bill!-but he"s got the gift of gab tike you wouldn"t believe.
Jacobs winked at her. You just golta love this big lug, don"lcha? Maybe old King Bozo knew what he was doing.
This is going to be okay, after all. A quick deal. nice and clean, and- That was exactly when Kethrommon bolted from his seat and attempted to leap across the table at Chaylaifa, his cere- monial dagger unsheathed. "You p.i.s.s-sprayed son of a wh.o.r.e!" Kethrommon cried in a white heat. "I"ll kill you""
Chaylaifa could move surprisingly quickly for such a big be- ing; he kicked back his chair and drew his very unceremonial blaster. Fortunately, the conference room"s defensive systems had clicked on instantly, and both antagonists had been safely caught in a tanglefield. The tanglefield could do nothing to si- lence Kethrommon, however, and he continued to shout threats.
Jacobs saw that Chaylaifa"s wife and child were shrieking but, since neither they nor anyone else in the gallery was offering any aggressive behavior, the tanglefield was ignoring them.
The tanglefield was also ignoring the two facilitators, who were frozen only by their own shock. Trudy"s eyes were bulg- ing. We must have missed something. What the h.e.l.l was it?
I don"t know, Trude. Let me access the transcript ... oh, no!
A Security squad arrived a moment later. Several of its members escorted Kethrommon to his suite, and Trudy ac- companied them. Others took Chaylaifa back to his rooms.
and Jacobs went with him.
"Amba.s.sador Chaylaifa," Jacobs carefully began when they were at last alone, "didn"t you realize that your ...
pleasant question ... represented the worst kind of insult to Sir Kethrommon?"
"It was not intended as such," Chaylaifa said. He was gen- uinely puzzled. "I have frequently asked it of humanoids, but I have never gotten such a response."
Jacobs licked his lips. "Mr. Amba.s.sador, some humanoids resent the implication that their mothers were impregnated with them by males who are not their acknowledged fathers."
Chaylaifa blinked. "But such things happen all the time, RHUUM SERVICE 97.
don"t they? Especially in n.o.ble houses? I"ve read many histo- ries of humanoid cultures."
"It"s true that such things do happen. But it is usually-not always, but usually-rude to suggest to an individual that he himself represents one of those cases. Some cultures put great store in being certain of whom one"s parents are and, more- over, having everyone else be certain of it, too. I hope you can understand that Sir Kethrommon would greatly resent your questioning his parentage."
"But I wasn"t doubting his parentage, Mr. Jacobs," Chaylaifa said. "I was simply asking who impregnated his mother."
"Now, m"lord," Trudy said soothingly, "you must know that the amba.s.sador didn"t mean to offend you."
They were sitting across from each other at a coffee table in the Bloxx"s sitting room. Kethrommon had grown calmer and was more in control of himself, but he was still hot with anger. "Indeed, woman?" he spat. "Then I would hate to be the victim of slurs he uttered with malicious intent."
"He is an alien, m"lord. He is not like you. He simply doesn"t understand."
Kethrommon nodded tightly. "I understand that. Barbarian, he is."
Trudy"s lips grew narrow. "If you like. He is certainly dif- ferent. Not better, not worse-just different."
"I know "different.* Trudy Burke," Kethrommon said. "I"ve stood in the dirt of a hundred worlds. I"ve eaten that which has tried to eat me; I"ve even eaten with that which has tried to eat me."
"So you know how deeply the differences between beings can run," said Trudy.
Kethrommon shook his head. "There is always decency, and decency never changes. Never. Let me tell you some- thing. I lost my father, he at my side against outsystem pirates terrorizing our good neighbors of the fourth planet in our system. He was blown apart by a fragmentation projectile. I had to wash him off me that night, after the battle."
Kethrommon"s teeth clenched. "I could overlook a slur upon myself, given a lack of intent, but I will not-cannot- countenance even an unintended insult against the memory of my father. My people desperately need the trade the Rhuum 98 Brad Ferguson Organization can provide, but I am no longer the one to get it for them."
Trudy blinked. "So what will you do?"
"There is only one way the Rhuum can answer for his insult-his death, by my hand."
"I hope there is another way, m"lord."
Suddenly Kethrommon sagged, the fight gone out of him.
"In Justice, I cannot take his life from him; I do indeed realize he meant no harm by what he said. Trudy Burke, I am not un- able to see that my killing the Rhuum would be a terrible crime under these circ.u.mstances; I am not stupid. I will, how- ever, leave Hotel Andromeda in the morning. As you are still acting as facilitator for these talks, please have my ship made ready for departure at that time." He carefully did not look at her.
Trudy took a deep breath, somehow sensing that this was a dangerous moment and that whatever she might say to him, angry as he was and hurt as he was, could be dreadfully im- portant- "I will do exactly as you ask," she finally said, and she saw Kethrommon relax Just a touch.
"Thank you," he said in a low voice. "Any other answer would not have done ... and I did not want to kill myself in front of you, Trudy Burke." Trudy saw the dagger hidden in his hand for the first time as he placed it on the table, the point facing him. "I must not kill myself until I stand in front of the king. That is the only way I may properly apologize to my patron G.o.d for my failure."
Trudy needed pills to get to sleep that night, and that was why the persistent beeping of the phone did not disturb her.
Jacobs had to shake her awake.
"Trudy, there"s a problem," he said in the darkness. "A big one."
"Whazzit?" his wife mumbled.
"That was Security. Chaylaifa is dead. Better start getting dressed; I"ll dial a wake-up for you."
Several minutes later Jacobs and Trudy caught a lift to the VIP section. The door to Chaylaifa"s suite was ajar; they en- tered.
Several Security people were in the foyer, standing near their chief of detail. There was a briefing going on. The chief RHUUM SERVICE 99.
was hard to make out, surrounded as he was by the others; he was only a meter and a fraction tall, like most adults of his race. He was, generally speaking, a lizard.
"Ah," he said, noticing Trudy and Jacobs. His mouth twitched into the semblance of a smile. "The partners of Ja- cobs and Burke, no? I am Lieutenant Hrock-Leff of Hotel Se- curity. These are several of my a.s.sociates."
"h.e.l.lo, Lieutenant, everyone," Jacobs said. "What hap- pened here?"
"I do not know quite yet," Hrock-Leff said. "The amba.s.sa- dor is dead. Do you care to see?"
"Eh? Uh, I guess I have to," Jacobs said. Trudy?"
She seemed shaken. "I"ll, uh, I"ll wait here, I suppose. Call me if you need me."
"Okay, Trude. Lieutenant? Lead on."
"This way, please, Mr. Jacobs." The two entered the main bedroom of the suite.
Chaylaifa"s body lay in the center of the bed. The blankets and sheets had been ripped by his claws and gathered around him, as if he had tried to provide himself with his own shroud even as he died. His eyes were open and glazed. There was an incredible amount of blood all over everything. Ritzcrackas and other tidbits were spilled here and there.
"It looks like he was stabbed," Jacobs said.
"He was," Hrock-Leff replied. "He was stabbed some forty times by someone with a smalt knife. From what I can see. at least eight of the wounds were severe enough to be fatal, in that Chaylaifa"s circulation system was irreparably damaged by each. He lost a great deal of blood very quickly. We have an identification, by the way."
"An identification?" Jacobs asked, puzzled. "Of the body?"
"No," the lieutenant replied. "Of the perpetrator. The chosha Nasu has named Sir Kethrommon of Bloxx."
"Jesus. Why am I not surprised?"
"I do not know. Let us go into the other bedroom, shall we?"
There was a connecting door to another bedroom in the suite. Inside, two Security officers were sitting with Nasu and Fehlorah. The two females were dressed in bathrobes supplied by the hotel; Nasu"s barely fit her, while tiny Fehlorah seemed 100 Brad Ferguson lost in hers. They were holding hands, and both seemed terri- bly upset.
"I"m sorry, Madame Chaylaifa," Jacobs began, searching for something appropriate to say. "Your husband"s death is a great loss to us all."
The Rhuum nodded her appreciation. "It is just Nasu now,"
she said, "but I thank you, Mr. Jacobs. Fehlorah also appreci- ates your sympathy."
"Certainly. Is there anything I can do?"
"Yes, there is. You can make sure that these police people here bring the murderer of Chaylaifa to justice." She glared at Hrock-Leff. "I am not sure of their intent. They seem reluc- tant to take that devil sp.a.w.n of Bloxx into custody."
Jacobs nodded. "I"ll do my best, Nasu. Fehlorah, will you be all right?"
"Yes, Mr. Jacobs," the girl said. "I will be all right."
"Very good. Lieutenant, may we talk?"
"Of course, Mr. Jacobs." They left the bedroom through another door and went into the sitting room common to all three bedrooms in the suite.
"Have a seat, Mr. Jacobs," Hrock-Leff invited, closing the door behind him. He himself squatted on a footstool, perfectly comfortable. "Would you like me to order something for you, now that we are alone? Coffee, perhaps?"
"No, nothing for me, thank you. Lieutenant? Have you ar- rested Kethrommon yet?"
"No. We have no need to bother him. We will not be arrest- ing Sir Kethrommon."
"Oh," Jacobs said, frowning. "Diplomatic immunity, eh?"
"Hmmm?" the lieutenant said, almost distractedly. "Oh, no.
We will not be arresting the Bloxx, because he did not kill Amba.s.sador Chaylaifa. He has not left his room all evening."
"Oh? How do you know?"
"We do not spy, Mr. Jacobs, but you probably know that the medical section keeps a pa.s.sive watch on VIPs at the ho- tel. should someone experience a health problem or suffer an accident. Looking at the records for tonight, we see that Kethrommon was in his room all evening. The records also let us fix the time of Amba.s.sador Chaylaifa"s death. Only two persons were with him at that moment: Nasu and Fehlorah."
"So one of them did it?"
RHUUM SERVICE 101.
"Almost certainly. If they did not-if the murderer was some- one not being monitored by the medical section, say a hotel staff member or some such-then they were present at the time of the killing and saw who did it, and can identify the criminal. It was not one of Chaylaifa"s staff; all arc VIPs and all are mon- itored, and we can account for the movements of every one of them. But that is neither here nor there. I suspect the former chosha did it, using a small knife as her weapon, in the vain hope that we would suspect Sir Kethrommon and his dagger.
The only other suspect is Fehlorah, and she is too small to have done such damage. I have not yet confronted Nasu with an ac- cusation, but I will in good time." Hrock-Leff yawned. "Pardon me; I was awakened for this. As I was saying, I am in no hurry to confront Nasu. She is not going anywhere."
"Excuse me? The "choh-shah"? You keep talking about one. Who the h.e.l.l is that?"
"You have been referring to Nasu as Chaylaifa"s wife. She was not that. She was his chosha."
"Well, whatever. Why did she kill Chaylaifa?"
"I do not know yet. My initial inspection of the scene sug- gests that Nasu was tired of being forced to indulge Chaylaifa in his s.e.xual perversions."
"What? Chaylaifa was a pervertT "It would seem so. I believe that the amba.s.sador must have already thoroughly corrupted young Fehlorah, the thaka "thott-"
"The what?"
"The thaka"thoti," Hrock-Leff repeated, more slowly. "My good word, Mr. Jacobs. Did you really do so little research on the ways of the Rhuum before you took this a.s.signment?"
"Uh, wait a minute, there. My own chosha usually does that sort of thing; I"m the idea man. Lieutenant, we got this job at the very last minute. I learned all there was to know about the trade deal and what both sides expected from it.
Our job was to bring the Rhuum and the Bloxx together, take care of the niggling details so that both sides wouldn"t have to worry about them, lead them to strike the deal they both wanted, and send them home happy and satisfied. I didn"t think I needed a quickie degree in xenoanthropology, too."
"Perhaps you did, Mr. Jacobs," the lieutenant said, the sar- 102 Brad Ferguson casm lost on him. "Sorting these things out can sometimes become impossibly complicated. A degree might help."
"You may have a point there. Lieutenant Anyway, I thought there might be something weird going on between the old boy and me giri. Nasu knew all about it, I suppose."
Hrock-Leff blinked in surprise- "Well, Mr. Jacobs, I mean, really. What else would you expect?"