I Am A Killer

last updated: 23.04.17

Qin Ke Xuan returned home, only to see Qin Peng Cheng sitting along on the sofa watching the television.

She had originally intended to slip soundlessly back into her room. Qin Ke Xuan’s inadvertent gaze at the television, however, quickly resulted in her being attracted to the scene with the strange people who did not look like people on the screen. Hence, she stood behind the sofa and watched quietly.

Until the music sounded, and the scene changes, Qin Ke Xuan pointed at the television enthusiastically, asking Qin Peng Cheng: “Do you have any more of that?”

Qin Peng Cheng did not realise that Qin Ke Xuan had returned at all, hence the sudden voice from behind, on top of just finishing watching Detective Conan’s murder case, gave him a huge scare, “Ah! When did come back, why didn’t you make any noise? Do you want me to die of a heart attack?!”

“What was that just now?” Qin Ke Xuan asked.

Qin Peng Cheng said impatiently: “Conan! Detective Conan! You don’t even know this, are you sure you’re from Earth?” He actually got that right, Qin Ke Xuan was not from this world!

Qin Ke Xuan said: “I want to watch more.”

“It ended! If you want to watch, go watch it on the net!”

“You do it.”

“Why should I listen to you?!” Qin Peng Cheng glared at her ferociously.

Qin Ke Xuan did not haggle with the immature kid. She looked at him indifferently and returned to her room.

Qin Peng Cheng called after her: “Oi! Mummy and daddy are not coming back tonight. You prepare dinner.”

Already on the stairs, Qin Ke Xuan stopped, and turned around, “Why should I listen to you?” After saying that, she turned and went into her room.

Qin Peng Cheng widened his eyes in shock, shouting: “Hateful woman! You want to starve me to death?! I’ll tell daddy! You wait and see!”

Qin Ke Xuan closed the door, locking Qin Peng Cheng’s noisy screams outside. She placed her school bag on the floor and proceeded to jump from her balcony over to Yin Xu Dong’s balcony. She pushed the door, entering. Yin Xu Dong was not there.

Qin Ke Xuan opened the bedroom door and walked out, only to hear a fl.u.s.tered and exasperated voice, “You d.a.m.ned dog! I’m gonna slaughter you!”

She went down to the first floor and saw Yin Xu Dong grabbing a piece of cloth. A golden yellow little dog bit the other end of the cloth. The pair of them, a guy and a dog, were pulling from both their own sides.

“What are you doing?”

Upon hearing Qin Ke Xin’s voice, Yin Xu Dong got a scare, before shouting, all riled up: “Qin Ke Xuan, hurry bring your dog home!”

The dog, however, suddenly released the end it had been clenching tightly onto, and scuttled over to Qin Ke Xuan’s side, yapping excitedly, wagging its tag in circles non-stop. It even stuck out her tongue and licked her ankle.

The moist and slimy feel almost made Qin Ke Xuan kick out her leg involuntarily, but when she looked down and saw the pair of watery dog eyes, she restrained herself and resorted to only pushing the dog away gently.

“Give it to him.” Qin Ke Xuan glanced at the cloth Yin Xu Dong was holding in his hand.

Yin Xu Dong’s face scorched, half mad, and half embarra.s.sed. That was his underwear! Underwear! “Why should I give it to him?”

“Mmh?”

“…I know, I’ll listen to your commands, but, but can I change this? This is my underwear!”

“Then you give something else.” Qin Ke Xuan liked to think that she was very open to discussion. Since was undergarments, it would be better that he kept it for himself.

“And, may you bring the dog home? I swear we are natural enemies, we don’t see eye to eye at all. It’s annoying as heck how it always set itself against me!”

“No can do.”

Yin Xu Dong looked at the dog that only hypes up with Qin Ke Xuan around in frustration, and turned to face the dog, which was now baring its teeth in his face, “But, it, very evidently, wants to follow you.”

“You handle it accordingly. If you can’t figure things out, you can forget about looking for me.” Qin Ke Xuan said diplomatically.

Yin Xu Dong “Ha?” ed, and hung his head, his shoulders sagging dejectedly. After this while of being threatened by his “Mei Mei-next-door”, he was used to this.

(T/N: “Mei Mei” = 妹妹; younger sister)

His enthusiasm returned in a heartbeat, and he asked Qin Ke Xuan’s purpose for coming. “Does your visit entail the beginning of my Xiao Li Flying Dagger lessons?!”

“No.”

“Ha? Then when are you gonna start teaching me?”

“Soon.”

“Really? Don’t lie to me.”

“I don’t lie.” Why bother, when you can just kill the person?

Yin Xu Dong looked into Qin Ke Xuan’s gleamingly clear and unquestionable eyes, “Okay, then what do you want me to do now?” It cannot be questions regarding studies already? He sure did not forget what she had mentioned in the afternoon.

“I want to watch Conan, get me some on the net*.”

Yin Xu Dong whispered to himself: “Why suddenly Conan? Can’t she go online to watch it on her own if she wanted to watch it? Unless she got addicted to ordering me around?”

“Hm?”

“No, nothing, I’ll search it up for you immediately.” After saying this, he ran up to his bedroom on the second floor.

Qin Ke Xuan followed after tightly. She was curious, how was it that such a thing could be watched on the net? What kind of net was so magical? A fishnet*?

(T/N: Chinese wordplay here, so in Chinese, “上网” = go online/use the Internet; it can be directly translated into “go up (onto) the net”; Qin Peng Cheng used “上网” and Qin Ke Xuan deciphered it as “go up (onto) the net”, whereby she thought the “网” = “net” was something tangible where she could find her Conan, hence as to why she was referencing questioningly to “渔网” = “fishnet”, which was a type of net, and also hence as to why I translated her phrasing when she asked Yin Xu Dong to “get me some on the net” slightly strangely)

She saw Yin Xu Dong sitting before his desk upon reaching his room. On the table was placed a television-like item, except that it was a lot smaller in size. The images on the screen were also changing continuously. Yin Xu Dong held a palm-sized item in his hand, pressing it, at the same time pulling open the drawer of his desk. There was a black and long board, with many tiny squares printed with unfamiliar symbols jutting out unevenly. His hands tapped these squares dizzyingly fast, and Qin Ke Xuan saw words appearing on the screen—Detective Conan.

So this was the net? It looked even more amazing than the television.

“Where do you want to start from?”

“The beginning.”

“In that case, sit down here.” Yin Xu Dong stood up to give his seat to Qin Ke Xuan.

After sitting down for a short while, Qin Ke Xuan pointed out a problem, “This, it doesn’t sound like the one on the television, I don’t understand it.”

“Ha, if you can understand j.a.panese, that’d be sick as heck. The one shown on TV has Chinese voiceover, if you want to watch the ones on the Internet, obviously you’ll be listening to the original language! If you can’t understand, then just look at the subt.i.tles, I usually look at the subt.i.tles too.”

“Mmh, teach me how to use this net next time.” Qin Ke Xuan said earnestly.

“Ha? I need to teach you this? Tudou* works the same way as every other normal website.”

(T/N: Tudou is a (paid?) Chinese website where people can watch dramas and animes and stuff; slightly similar to Netflix I guess)

“Mmh.”

“Da Jie, are you trolling me, everyone who can use a computer knows how to use the Internet.”

“How to use a computer, you need to teach me that too.”

Oh gosh, he met a 21st-century tech-idiot, but never mind, for his Xiao Li Flying Daggers and Sunflower Dian Xue Hand, he would endure!

While she was engrossed in the story Detective Conan was telling, Qin Ke Xuan’s phone rang. She fished it out and threw it to the Yin Xu Dong, who happened to be lying on the ground, together with the dog, competing with the dog. “Answer it.”

Yin Xu Dong rolled his eyes. She even wanted him to answer her calls; looked like he had completely fallen into her hands as a slave.

“h.e.l.lo? Qin Ke Xuan? She’s busy, you can tell me if you have anything you need to pa.s.s on to her, me? I’m her neighbour, yeah, I’m Yin Xu Dong, ah, it’s Uncle Qin, mmh, yes, okay, I’ll tell her. Okay, got it, bye.” Yin Xu Dong hung up and looked at Qin Ke Xuan complicatedly.

“Talk.” It was as though Qin Ke Xuan had a pair of eyes on her back.

Yin Xu Dong gaped, horrified, and then proceeded to scratch his head, saying carefully: “That kid at your house…”

“Why?”

“Nothing much, it’s just that your dad told you to not bully him.”

“I didn’t.” Why would she ever want to do such a status-lowering deed?

“Then you plan on starving him?” That girl did not look like those evil stepsister type. At most, she was a malicious person, malicious to everyone that is, not just targeting her stepbrother.

“Can’t he eat on his own?”

Yin Xu Dong: “… I’ve seen him before, he’s only a seven- or eight-year-old…”

“And so? What has this got to do with age?”

Yin Xu Dong was speechless. All he knew was that this gal was odd and eccentric nowadays. Perhaps it had something to do with the mythical martial arts she learned from somewhere, or the fact that her parents were at odds for years and recently divorced. Unfortunately, he had not interacted with her much these years, so he had no way, nor right, to know what it was that had catalysed such a huge change in her.

Seeing Yin Xu Dong quiet, Qin Ke Xuan could not help but think about another possibility, “Why? Will he actually starve?” If he actually does starve to death, will it entail the people in the house she was residing in, her apparent father and stepmother, chasing her out? “Then you go get him some food.”

Yin Xu Dong did not expect such an inconvenience to befall him, “Why me?! I’m not going!”

Qin Ke Xuan turned, her chilly voice sounded from her clenched teeth: “I realised, that whatever I tell you to do you seem to be unwilling, to, follow, through?”

Yin Xu Dong’s body trembled, and half-ran-half-crawled to the balcony, and jumped into Qin Ke Xuan’s room, disappearing in a flash, saving for his voice that lingered in the air: “Roger!”

Qin Ke Xuan watched Conan, feeling beyond shocked. All those refined ways of murdering someone, he actually saw through everything. That Conan kid was way too astounding! Even though she was quite disdainful about their killing methods, but every time there was a murder, there would be a bunch of people, who called themselves police, appearing to catch the killer. It looked like she had to be more cautious in her future endeavours. It would be better to stir up less trouble, seeing how she was on her own in this strange place.

After watching for a while, Qin Ke Xuan realised a huge problem. Conan, no matter where he went, would encounter murder cases, and he would be able to see through the killer’s plan and motive every time, this… this was way too strange. She then thought about the evidences she left behind when killing someone, if they were seen by Conan, it would be hard to say whether she would be able to escape… the people in the alley in the afternoon, they did not die, right? She seemed to not have any intent on murdering anyone then, right?

Qin Ke Xuan, upon realising that she was worried about whether they were dead or alive, was aggravated. She had always just finished off the target and leave, when had she ever worried about anything else? It was all the despicable Conan’s fault. Since he was poisoned and turned into a child anyway, why did he not just stick with being a normal kid, was he too idle or something!

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