I Am The Queen

She couldn"t believe this day. First, some hooligans made her realized what a person she had become. And second, this man, this untouchable man that was so hard to ignore with his intimidating presence, this crude man that didn"t know what subtle means — was encouraging her? She was receiving encouragement from the one person that she didn"t want to have any more dealings with. From the one person that she didn"t expect to care nor bother about her.

It was also the same at that time. At that time when she was at her lowest point in life. Where she felt that the world was the cruelest to her. Where she felt that living was no longer bearable. Where she thought that she was no longer a person but just a commodity, where she had lost not only her innocence but also her will to face the future — he had been the unexpected light that had illuminated her darkest thoughts. His words were crude and degrading, yet she had lost count on how many times it had saved her.

He had been her tormentor and savior at the same time, not only at that time but even now.

No one had helped her. Not her family, not her father, not her friends, not the man she loves. It was him, a stranger that she barely knew.

Satele inwardly chuckled at herself while tucking a hair beside her ear.

After an awkward silence, she slowly stood up and quietly turned around to walk to the opposite direction.

"Where are you going?"

Asher asked, raising an eyebrow at the woman who was snubbing him.

Satele paused, yet she didn"t turn back while she answered in a calm even tone. "I still have an interview to finish. If you"ll excuse me."

Then she walked at a steady pace. She was still feeling conflicted yet her eyes were much brighter now while her gaze was steady.

Asher watched the silhouette of the woman until not a shadow remained, his dark onyx orbs rippled with emotions that he was not familiar with. Felt very foreign and… uncomfortable.

However, before his mind could process what precisely the emotions that were twirling inside him, his mood deflated when he heard a chuckled behind him.

"Eavesdropping is really a bad habit in the family." Asher turned around, hands still inside his pockets while he faced his older brother who was now exposing himself behind a tree.

While Alvaro lightly laughed as he leisurely strode towards his second bother. "Can"t say I argue with you there." Then he stopped just in front of Asher, smirking while his devious eyes glanced at the direction where Satele had gone.

"Your taste has change, brother. Is she really that good in bed that you"re so concerned about her?"

An angry vein popped from Asher"s forehead while he barked. "Shut up! Stop making remarks that you know nothing about!"

Alvaro leisurely held his chin, playfully eyeing his brother. "My, my, such temper. And you"re even angry on her behalf. This is indeed…. unexpected. Who would have thought that my little brother would finally found his spring?"

Asher"s face turned unsightly red, snapping angrily. "What nonsense are you spouting about?! She"s just a pitiable girl who arouses my manly instincts! Nothing more!"

Then afraid of what more his older brother would say, Asher calmly, yet speedily ran-walk away.

Alvaro grinned while watching the retreating figure of his second brother as he murmured to himself. "He"s still a kid."

----

"There you are! We have been looking everywhere for you! Where have you gone to?"

Lanky and fatty immediately ran towards Satele when they saw her. They were panting and gasping for air, faces covered in sweat.

Satele felt guilty at looking at their somewhat haggard faces. They apparently had been searching for her everywhere until they were this exhausted.

She was about to say that she was sorry for losing her temper and for running away like that when the two beat her to it.

"We"re sorry!"

She blinked when the two men bowed and apologized to her. For a moment, her mind went blank, didn"t know how to react.

Then after, she hurriedly said. "N-no... it should be me who is sorry." She seriously gazed at the two who was looking at her in bewilderment. "I went out of line. Apologies for my rudeness. If it"s no trouble, I wish to continue the interview with you two."

The two men looked at each other, slightly relieved while the corners of their lips stretched, forming a smile that urged everyone to slap their faces silly. "Don"t worry about it! We too are also in the wrong for not taking you seriously."

Then the lanky man smacked his chest. "From now on we will answer all your questions truthfully. So ask away!" After all, if we don"t, the boss might beat us. He did say that we have to take care of this woman.

Satele slightly smiled. Her prejudice had vanished entirely. Even though the two men looked scary and seemed to be always up to no good, she could see that they have a good heart.

"Why don"t we find somewhere to sit first?" Fatty suggested.

Where after they made themselves comfortable under the shade of a gazebo. Thirty minutes pa.s.sed and Satele had mostly gotten what she wanted from the two. Well… mostly.

"Is… Asher Cole the one who owned this place?"

Her lashes dropped at her notepad, pretending to be serious. Yet that slight quivering of her lips between her teeth betrayed her inner feelings.

He hated the man, yes, but now she was curious about him. And… she was shocked at herself to find that the hate she felt, bubbling inside her for a year, had somehow lessened while the loathing towards herself that laid deep within her heart was being cleansed with forgiveness.

The two boys looked at each other — silent understanding in their eyes. The Queen"s ident.i.ty is a top secret. With a determined straight face, they rocked their heads back and forth. "Yes, boss owned this place." It"s true anyway. Boss built this place to make their Queen happy. Ah! Such devotion!

Of course, the Cole"s main family line were the only people who knew that Evangeline was actually the real owner of EvaLand. So naturally the guys didn"t know anything.

Satele looked at the two with raised eyebrow. Her gut feeling was telling her that these guys were hiding something. And besides, she couldn"t see how Asher would build a place like this. It was out of character for him. She doesn"t peg him to be an animal lover. She wanted to push her questions further, but her pride got in the way. She didn"t want to ask anything about that man anymore.

Then after another rounds of questions, Satele looked at the two who were sitting lazily, taking in the cold air, seemingly bored.

Her eyes slightly fluttered before she gathered her courage and asked a question that she wanted to know the answer so badly.

"Have you ever done something... illegal before?"

The two slowly stared at each other before they abruptly straightened themselves from their seat like something sharp had poked them from behind.

"W-what do you mean… i-i-illegal?" Lanky and fatty began to sweat while they stuttered.

Satele continued in a calm voice, ignoring their uneasiness. "You know, stealing or threatening someone for money. I heard that you two are… not well off. And since most labeled you as hooligans anyway, didn"t it ever come to your mind to be just like that? Blackmailing or stepping on other people to get what you wanted?"

That"s right… just like that woman.

Satele"s eyelids gradually lowered while her eyes dimmed. Then she rapidly blinked when she heard the relief sighs of the two.

"*whew… It"s only that? I thought you found out that it was us that vandalized that ugly car that had parked at the side of the road or that it was us that burned that dog meat processing house or that—ump!"

Fatty didn"t finish his sentence when lanky abruptly shoved his hand against the fatty"s mouth to shut him up.

"Ahahahaha! Look at you and your wild delusions!"

Then lanky gave Satele an awkward laugh. "Don"t listen to this fatty. The cold air must have gone inside his brain and his spouting one of his dreams. Ahahaha."

Satele was taken aback while her face didn"t know what expression to take in. Somehow, she had the feeling that it was not just one of fatty"s dream as those things actually happened in the past.

While lanky straightened himself and slightly coughed, looking at Satele seriously, trying to change the topic. "Hmm… doing illegal things, huh…" He was sporting an expression who was seriously thinking while he said solemnly. "I did think of it… countless times in the past."

"….."

"….."

The air turned severe and tense, but then lanky went back to his original state of being a person infected with a lazy virus while he answered in a nonchalant tone.

"But then, that man"s hateful face always appeared in my mind. It feels like, if I do something that he had done in the past like the one you mentioned, I"ll turn out to be like him. And that is the one thing that I don"t want to happen the most!"

Then fatty second the motion in a droopy manner. "That"s right. We maybe your common thugs, but we still fear the law (at least if boss isn"t around to help us). Just thinking of my cute little sister"s face when she finds out that his brother became a criminal gives me the shudder. That alone is enough to deflate any evil thoughts in my mind."

The two men were still being laid back and treated the subject matter carelessly, yet Satele was dumbstruck at their answers yet again.

In pursuing her goal, she was not aware that she was losing something bit by bit. If not for these two and Asher, who knew what would she become?

That woman that she hated and admired at the same time, without her knowing it, she was slowly turning out to be like her. To be the person that she hated the most.

Satele bit her lips.

Ah… I really am… an idiot…

She felt depressed and pressured for so long for the reason that no matter how hard she tried, no matter how much she accomplished, no matter how many times she struggled, in the end, it felt like all her efforts where useless as she couldn"t seem to uplift their lives. She still seemed so pretty far away from her peers who were already successful and happier. So far away from that woman.

With these feelings, she thought that she was not determined nor doing the best she could and resorted by any means to get results even if she had to fabricate stories, just like that woman.

But in the end… she wasn"t happy and felt like there was something that was always heavily weighing in her heart… And for the obvious reason... for the obvious reason that was so simple, yet taken for granted... she was she. Not her.

In the end, she didn"t want to trample on other people nor achieve her goals with any means necessary for the straightforward reason that she couldn"t face her mother and little brother"s innocent look.

She was still lost and anxious about her future. However, this time, she was leaning on the right track at what her heart wanted — leaning in the direction that makes her feel right.

Satele smiled and glanced at the two guys who were busy talking to each other before she glanced up at the clear sky.

Angel Lin… you and I are different after all.