Chapter 15: Family Rules, Your Uncle!
"The first rule is to exercise twice a week for more than two hours each time. Jogging and playing ball games are acceptable. Every week, you will learn how to use self-defense techniques, which can be used proficiently to ensure good health. With this, you can also help protect yourself. If you were not able to accomplish it, you must receive the penalty of trail running for ten kilometers.”
Tian Yuan simply glared at him.
“Second, regardless if it’s a major event or a small matter, it must be reported to the superior.” Pan Lei pointed at his own nose. A non-verbal way of telling Tian Yuan that he is the superior and everything will be reported to him. Pan Lei thinks that he must keep himself abreast with the movements of his family.
"Third, all things must not be concealed. Searching is very strenuous, makes people uneasy, and sometimes needs one to travel.
Tian Yuan quickly rose to a fit of bad temper. This is not a family rule! He was basically restricting his personal freedom! Why not simply find a cage to lock him up? How can there be such house rules? He is not a pretty and young 16-year-old girl or a little flower girl who would run away when they encounter bad guys. He is not someone who would be afraid that he would be bullied by such bad guys either.
"I have long wanted to discuss this with you. You can’t go on and just be a doctor in that hospital. My mom is the president of the Armed Police Hospital [1]. I"ll transfer you over there.
With such arrangement, even when I am on a mission and not with you, my mother can take care of you. If you don"t want to live at home, you and mom can also get off work together and go live in the military compound in the military district. This way, I can rest a.s.sured even knowing that you live by yourself.
In case of robbery and someone wants to kill you, a row of guards in the military district compound is always ready to take action. They can guarantee your safety. My mom is also very fastidious about health. She will be able to take good care of you. You should move in and live there.” Pan Lei put down the pen and paper, and with some earnest and well-meaning advice, he patiently persuades the other guy.
It was like having a disobedient wife at home. The husband, Pan Lei is coaxing Tian Yuan to move in together with his mother-in-law which is the best plan to secure his safety. Telling him further that they will surely live well together. Moreover, his mother-in-law was a very good-tempered and well-educated woman. She would definitely not abuse her daughter-in-law.
It is estimated that if Pan Lei will dare to speak these words, Tian Yuan will grab a fruit knife to slice him.
Without warning, Tian Yuan dropped the remote control. “Move, your uncle! Get out! I am dissatisfied with you! Take your rules with you and get the f*** out of here!”
Since Tian Yuan started working, he was fully capable of supporting himself. But then, he suddenly had to meet such a person who wanted to turn his life upside down. He is an adult who doesn’t need someone to care for him. He is not afraid of robbery even if his skills are not good enough. He knows how to be self-reliant, self-sufficient, and does not require Pan Lei’s impenetrable cage that will only trap him and not really protect him. Tian Yuan was so upset whenever he sees him so he attempts to move away.
“Okay, ancestor, I will listen to you. Do not move away first. Why is it so difficult for you to agree? I think everything is completely fine. You will not suffer even a little hardship. Are you thinking that I am doing this just for the heck of it? I am only afraid that you will suffer injustice. Taking into consideration that temper of yours, anybody could bully you. If such thing happens, do you know how to fight? What I am trying to say is, in times that I’m not with you, my mother should be able to look after you. Doing so would grant me relief.”
Pan Lei rambled on and on while looking at Tian Yuan with some grievances, as if Tian Yuan had insulted his sincerity. He looked pitiful. Tian Yuan grabbed his pillow and hit him with it. “Rambling like a neighborhood aunt, are you even a man?!”
Pan Lei smiled, and he approached Tian Yuan. “Am I not a man? Why don’t you touch it.”
Pan Lei grabbed Tian Yuan’s hand and led it towards his crotch area. Tian Yuan felt like the hand that’s being held was scorching hot and before his hand could trace over that thing, Tian Yuan threw off Pan Lei’s hand. He also suddenly jumped to the side of the sofa, and with a scarlet face, he yelled at Pan Lei. “Smelly, smelly rogue!”
Tian Yuan is pointing his fingers at Pan Lei. He looked so shy and furious at the same time. Pan Lei laughed with his body rocking back and forth. Ouch, don’t be so cute. He especially provoked him because he wanted to see him raise his neck and howl at him, like a granny teaching her little grand daughter how to shout at the big bad wolf.
“Don’t fuss over it anymore. Let’s proceed with the rules. Rule No. 4. I’ll call you when I’m out on a mission, but make sure you that the call will go through each time. You are not allowed to hang up.”
“Fifth, you can’t be angry. You can be angry, but you shouldn’t take your body as a joke. That means you can’t go on a diet. Also, do not make use of silent treatment simply because you don’t want to deal with the other person. You can’t get angry in any dangerous place either. A dangerous place is anywhere outside the room.”
“Sixth, don’t do anything that is perilous. That includes changing light bulbs. How can you play with electricity? You must call a professional who does electrical works. Or you can just call me. I will do everything. We can also save money that way.”
“Seventh, everything is organization-centered and don’t question organizational decisions. The organization is me. I decide the big things, and you are responsible for the minor things. But all the small matters must be reported to me. After I have given my permission, then that is the only time that you are allowed to act.”
Tian Yuan feels like he is about to spit blood.
“Eighth, don’t just vanish casually and run away. Don’t think that when I’m not around you, you can just slip away. If we quarrel, you can’t give me the ‘running away’ att.i.tude. If you do so, wait for me to find you and see how I clean you up.”
“Ninth, keep a distance from men and women. Draw a line between all of them. Don’t try to irritate me by trying to hook up with women. If some people confess to you, you must severely reject them to stifle the evil thoughts from its bud. You cannot be disloyal to me.”
Tian Yuan began to look around, searching for a good tool that can directly make this bandit faint.
“The tenth and the last one, we must spend a lifetime together and we must not break up in the middle.
All of the above regulations shall be resolutely implemented. Take it seriously. If you violate one of them, you will be punished accordingly. The lightest punishment is to carry a load and then run.
My dear, do not challenge my bottom line. Should that time ever comes, I do not know how I will punish you.
I will paste the rules on the wall. Look at it everyday to engrave it in your memory. Don’t make mistakes.”
Tian Yuan has been driven beyond the limits of forbearance. He jumped up with a stance of a fierce tiger, then plunged towards Pan Lei. He crushed him, and slapped him on the chest.
“Your uncle! I’ll beat you to death! I haven’t seen anyone who is so rogue! You broke into my house and I decided not to say anything, but you also made me listen to your bulls*** family rules! No way, I will not agree with you! I love what I do, so mind your own business!”
Pan Lei was not afraid of him, his hands wrapped around his waist. He carefully held him with a look of a painful smile.
"Tian’er, do I not love you? If I don’t, will I be strict with you? As long as you are well-behaved and you listen to me, I will love you very much. I will treat you as a baby and love you as an ancestor. I will take care of you, love you, and live with you for all of my life. I won’t let you regret it.
My dear, live with me forever. Like all ordinary couples, I will make money for you and you help me spend it. I will meet all your requests. You are the only person in my life whom I would like to fall in love with. I won’t let you regret nor suffer a loss.
Hey, to be honest, I don’t really care about your bad temper. The truth is, I like it too. I’ll cook for you and wash your clothes. I am willing to do so as long as you are by my side. I will love you forever. With the honor of our entire family of soldiers, I swear to love you for a lifetime.”
Pan Lei looked into Tian Yuan’s eyes and also made a silent oath. ‘Falling in love with you is but a spur of the moment. But, loving you will be for a lifetime. Just be obedient and promise me that we will be together and I will love you forever.’
Notes:[1] 武警 wǔjǐng – stands for ‘armed police’. I did not change the hospital name because I was guessing that the author meant the hospital is managed by both the military and the police.your uncle – same with ‘your mother’ which is a curse phrase
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