Chapter 185: Stranded and Found
After he left Nana"s house, Shishio didn"t immediately return to Sakurasou, but he went to his private parking park to get his motorcycle. He knew that with this, his relationship with Nana was confirmed. Before, he might have felt guilty for dating two girls at the same time, but now, he knew that he didn"t have time to have such a feeling, and even if he had time to do so, he thought that it was better to use that time to show how much grat.i.tude that he felt toward both of them who could accept him.
Shishio might not be able to say that he loved both of them, but even with that condition, they accepted him, even knowing his selfish desire to possess them and to stay beside him, so all he could do to repay them was to learn how to love them as soon as possible.
"Love..."
When Shishio thought about this single word, it ached his heart, and it made him uncomfortable. He loved someone, but he couldn"t see her now. This pain, unless someone felt it themselves, no one would understand it.
"For now, let"s finish the book. What comes after? Let"s think about it later."
Shishio thought to solve his problem by writing a book that way, he hoped to solve his pain and started his new life, but he wondered whether it was really that easy?
Shishio looked at his side, and there was no one beside him, somehow his steps became heavy, but when he thought about Saki and Nana.
"..."
Shishio stopped and closed his eyes for a moment, thinking about the time they spent together. He was with the two of them and knew that there was no time to think negatively. He had confessed to two girls, which meant he had a responsibility to take care of them, at least, to make them happy since they had tolerated him dating them together, but...
"Why is it so hard to love someone?"
It was so easy to take out his d.i.c.k to f.u.c.k someone, but to entrust his heart to someone and lay his everything bare naked in front of them, Shishio felt that it was harder than anything.
Shishio didn"t like it when his mind was empty since, in this state, his thought had always wandered in a strange direction, and the negative thoughts had always come to his head one after another.
Shishio thought to return to Nana"s house since he could talk with her for a bit to seek comfort, but when he was about to take his step, his phone vibrated. He took his phone, and his pupils enlarged because of surprised when he saw the one who had called him out. He then didn"t hesitate and accepted the call.
"Mashiro?"
"Shishio, I want to see you," Shiina said.
"....."
Shishio stood on the street, and no words came out from his mouth. It was such a simple sentence, but somehow, it cleared his mind up. "I"ll go home after I get my motorcycle?"
"Motorcycle?"
"Um." Shishio walked, staring at the street in front of him, and said, "I"ll take you on the ride when we"re on holiday."
"Ride?"
"...."
Shishio somehow needed to explain a lot of things to Shiina at this moment.
---
Ritsu looked at Shiina, who was talking with Shishio through the phone, she wanted to say something, but in the end, she kept her mouth shut, especially when she saw the smile on Shiina"s face.
Usually, Shiina had always put a dazed expression on her face, and today, she seemed like a cat who hadn"t seen her master for a long time, but now she was talking with her master and heard his voice after a day, which was enough to smile at her.
Ritsu saw all of that, and after a moment, she could only show a bitter smile.
"Ritsu?"
Ritsu looked at Shiina, who was looking at her worriedly. She looked at her and patted her head. Even though it was a bit hard for her to smile, she still put on a gentle expression. "Are you done talking?"
"Um." Shiina nodded and asked, "Do you want to talk with Shishio?"
"I...." Ritsu wasn"t sure how to answer.
Shiina might not fully understand the meaning of love, but when she saw Ritsu"s expression, somehow, her heart tightened. She knew that there was one question that she wanted to ask at this moment, but words couldn"t come out of her mouth, and in the end, she didn"t say anything, waiting for Ritsu"s answer.
Ritsu looked at Shiina, who kept staring at her, and shook her head. "No."
---
They talked for a while before they ended their conversation since Shishio was on his way to his private parking park, but suddenly someone called him out again.
Shishio looked at the person who called him out and raised his eyebrow. "Senpai?"
"Shishio, sorry for bothering you so suddenly." Miu"s voice was mixed with both worry and shyness when she uttered those words.
"No, it is alright. What"s wrong?" Shishio asked.
"I have heard that you helped Nana to go home today," Miu said.
"Um, sorry for not coming to the club before," Shishio said.
"No, no, it is alright, you don"t need to worry too much."
Shishio thought for Miu then said, "Still, we haven"t met each other for today."
"Um..." Miu nodded, and there was some trace of loneliness. "We haven"t met each other today."
"Do you miss me?" Shishio asked.
"Wh---?!"
Hearing her voice, Shishio could imagine how this girl was blushing and became fl.u.s.tered. He smiled and said, "Somehow, I want to see you, Senpai."
---
Miu was dumbfounded, and her heart was racing at this moment when she heard those words. Her face was red, and she was embarra.s.sed, but she still said it regardless. "I want to see you too, Shishio."
---
Hearing her voice, Shishio was a bit surprised by Miu"s sudden boldness, but before he said anything, she asked, "Shishio, are you interested in writing?"
Shishio raised his eyebrow and asked, "What"s wrong, Senpai?"
---
Miu was in her room at the time, laying on her bed with her phone near her ear, and said, "No, I just wonder whether you feel like you"re being forced to join."
"You want me to quit, Senpai?"
"Of course not!" Miu quickly raised her voice, and her heart almost stopped at that moment. She quickly raised her body from the bed when she thought Shishio might quit the literature club.
"Nee-chan?"
Miu looked at her little brother and little sister, who were looking at her curiously. Her face turned red, and she said, "Can you leave me alone for a while?"
Miu"s little sister wanted to accompany her sister, but her little brother quickly caught the little sister and said, "Let Nee-chan alone. She"s talking with her boyfriend."
"....."
Miu"s face was so red at that moment.
"Well, Senpai, in truth, I"m writing a story right now."
"Eh?" Miu was surprised and quickly asked, "Really?"
"Um."
"Can I read it?" Miu asked quickly.
"Can."
Miu thought for a while and asked, "Do you want to visit my house?"
"..."
Miu then quickly realized her mistake. Her face was so red that it was almost burning, and there was smoke on her head. "I - I mean, I also write a story. Do you want to read mine too?"
"Why not? How about tomorrow after school?"
"Yes!" Miu agreed without hesitation.
They talked for a while before they ended their conversation.
Miu smiled and plopped on her bed again. Somehow she felt nervous and excited when she thought that Shishio was going to visit her house. "Ugh... I"m so bold!" She covered her face with her hands and wondered why she suddenly invited him to visit her house, but she knew that she felt that she was going to lose him if they didn"t meet each other.
"Nee-chan, have you finished talking with your boyfriend?"
"....."
Miu looked at the heads of her little brother and little sister, who poked out sneakily from the door, looking at her with a smile on their faces, somehow she felt that her face was burning at this moment.
---
Shishio looked at his phone for a while before it vibrated again.
"..."
Shishio connected the phone quickly and heard the voice of the girl that he had just separated for a while.
"Shishio, have you gone home?" Nana asked.
"Not yet. I"m going to get a motorcycle before I go home," Shishio said.
"Eh? Motorcycle? Not the Vespa?" Nana was surprised.
"No, this one is different. I"ll show it to you tomorrow," Shishio said.
"Let"s have a ride then! I want to go to the beach!" Nana quickly said cheerfully.
"It"s still April. The temperature is frigging cold. You want to have a date on the beach?" Shishio asked speechlessly.
"Da - Date?!"
Shishio was speechless when Nana was fl.u.s.tered, they had kissed each other, and she got embarra.s.sed because of going on a date?
Shishio was wondering what this girl was thinking, but if he knew that Nana thought that they might have s.e.x after they went home from a date, he could only say that not only a guy was full of dirty thoughts, but a girl was also full of dirty thoughts.
"Well, let"s talk about this matter again tomorrow."
"Um, see you tomorrow, Muah~."
After leaving a kiss from her call, Nana ended their call since she was embarra.s.sed!
"....." Shishio.
"If you"re embarra.s.sed, then don"t do it." That"s what Shishio wanted to say, but the phone was already closed, so he didn"t think too much. He was then about to walk again, but his phone vibrated again.
"..."
Shishio quickly connected the call again and found out who was the one who called him.
"So, have you succeeded?"
"...."
Somehow, this question was a bit weird because Shishio knew what this girl was asking, but somehow, he didn"t really want to answer this question since it was so rude. "What do you mean?"
"Sorry, my question was a bit too rude," Saki said quickly in a hurry.
"No, it"s alright, it"s completely normal that you react that way," Shishio said calmly since he felt that it was completely normal for Saki to feel jealous and bitter.
"If you understand, then can you break up with her?" Saki asked.
"Sorry." Shishio had confessed, and Saki told him to break up right away, there was no way that he could do that, even if in the future, he wouldn"t do something like that, but after hearing his answer, Saki didn"t seem angry.
"It"s alright, I have prepared myself, and I also know that you"ll answer me with this answer," Saki said calmly.
Shishio was in silence for a while and said, "I"m antic.i.p.ating our date on Sunday later."
"Um, me too." Her voice was full of tenderness when she said those words.
Then they talked for a while before they ended their call.
Shishio knew that he had done something sorry to Saki, but even so, he couldn"t stop it, and he didn"t regret it. The only thing that he could do was to make her not regret her decision and happy. It might seem hard for a normal man, but for him, he needed to do both of them, and he was going to do it.
Shishio then kept walking, and somehow his steps became lighter than before. He knew that thinking about his problem with a negative view wasn"t good, and it would only make him tired, so all he could do now was to see that it was all good, and he knew that he would be alright. He sought a connection, he sought a relationship, and he knew that he had it now. They had sacrificed themselves for him, so he knew that he couldn"t disappoint them and made sure they would be happy. He had seen his direction, and now, he knew that he wouldn"t be lost. Taking his steps gently but surely, he would learn to love them.