as able to understand these things after my hard work in researching this body. PT stands for points, obviously. By spending these I can restock and change the goods. It can also change the functions of the vending machine itself.

What I mean by ‘function’ is things like the ability to warm up or cool the goods, warm frozen goods, or boil water for Cup Ramen. There are many possible functions from what I saw, but I only briefly scanned the list.

I decided to research more about adding functions, but first, I researched the goods changer. There were seriously way too many goods. I looked through all of them, but they all required points to be bought.



As an experiment, I bought milk tea by spending 10 PT. I received (Cold) Milk-Tea (100). I swapped it with one of the corners that the mineral water was occupying. I could even control the price, so I decided to set it to 100 yen.[ED: A yen is worth slightly less than 1 cent]

It seems I can exchange 1 PT for 100 yen. Hoh, isn’t this a system that lets me  restock myself with the money I earn. How to say it, it’s like way too high tech.

After investigating my body and reading the description I found that I’m functioning without electricity. Instead, I consume points to serve as power/energy. 1 PT is consumed per hour, in other words, 24 PT per day. That means I need to make an average of 2400 yen every day to survive.

I still have over 900 PT left, so I can function for the month. Even so, I should try not to waste points carelessly. I need to have a stable income before I can adventure. (adventure in spending points, that is)

There is a reason for my thorough a.n.a.lysis. I’m freaking booored~. It’s been 2 days since my reincarnation into a vending machine but so far, no one has come. When I look carefully, it seems like no one will come to this lakeside with no road.

Maybe.. No one will ever come and I’ll die?

Nn,nn… — Haha, let’s research more about adding functions! There has to be a function that let’s me grow tires and move. No matter how you look at it, this place is bad for business. I need to move to a place with more people.

Eeeeeto, function, function. [ED: MC scrolling through the list of functions while muttering function to himself] Microwave? If there is hot water then I can provide hot meals. What else is there… Ooh. a function that pours water into paper cups. And then… nn? There is something weird behind this screen. What is that?

“Gugeggo Gugeggo”

Oh, it’s the voice of a living thing. I always wondered whether or not I was alone so I might as well concentrate on the sound. Just knowing there is a living being makes me feel kind of happy.

I’ve never heard a cry like that before but is sort of sounded like a frog. If I’m not mistaken, it came from the forest nearby. I don’t really have eyes so I focused on where the sound came from while pretending I was moving my eyes.

Something came out from behind a tree—— what? Eh, did frogs always have black skin or wear something that looks like leather armor? He’s holding a pitiful, shabby looking wooden bat. More importantly, he’s walking on two legs.

There’s no way it’s some new kind of frog. That head of his, it’s the same size as a humans! His arms and legs are covered in warts too. Even though he’s a frog he has dog like eyes with a really sharp gaze.

He definitely looks like a monster. A two-legged wart frog. His height is only at around 150 [ED: 4’11”] but he looks really fierce.

It’s all way too real. This really isn’t j.a.pan, huh. Normally I would be really surprised but the moment I became a vending machine common sense was already out the door. But, if this is another world then what about the currency?? There’s no way it’s yen right. Doesn’t that mean if I can’t get j.a.panese yen? Something doesn’t seem right here.

“Gerugugeggo?”

Ah, Humanoid Frog-san looked my way. Hey you, don’t get too close. Wait, he’s wearing leather armour so he must have some level of intelligence. Judging people just by how they look is the worst thing a human can do. Perhaps, is this my first customer?

“Welcome”

He might not understand what I’m saying, but just in case I greeted him.

“Guwagego!?”

He got surprised and started surveying his surroundings. Too bad, the sound is from this here vending machine. He poised his weapon. Though it would be funny if I spoke again… I really shouldn’t do that. For a while, he just searched his surroundings again but he couldn’t find anything and came back. Now that I’m looking at him this closely, it’s amazing how real this is. I’m actually really bad with amphibians, and they become even more frightening with human size,

He stayed 1 meter away from me and looked around in circles. He doesn’t understand what I am. After running in circles more he came back and he raised his arm… Oi, stop, what the f.u.c.k are doing with that stick?! I had no way of stopping the stick while he kept hitting me. I could only watch as it happened. The stick kept hitting the gla.s.s and I started shaking.

((Damage 3. Endurance decreased by 3))

What the h.e.l.l is this message? It feels like a game saying things like damage and endurance. Ahh, f.u.c.k. Don’t hurt the vending machine, G.o.d d.a.m.nit, it’s not what a living being should do. It may be a machine but it’s form is a work of art.

(( Damage 2. Endurance decreased by 2))

f.u.c.k you, you lowly frog, don’t get ahead of yourself. Just because I don’t fight back you -grrrr. It’s a good thing I don’t feel pain, but won’t I break at this rate!? Hold on, what’s this “endurance”. It feels more like life points rather than how much you can endure.

((Endurance: When it is exhausted, the vending machine will break and cease to function))

Ohhh, so it’s like HP. I wonder how much is left. But I don’t even know how to check how much endurance is remaining…….

((Vending Machine

   Endurance  95/100

   Defence: 10

   Strength    0

   Agility         0

   Dexterity    0

   Mana         0

    Refrigeration, heat insulation))

Oooh, something came. It’s my status. Everything other than Defense and Endurance is zero. Oh well, those are of no use for a vending machine anyways. There also seems to be mana in this world, which means magic exists… f.u.c.k, wouldn’t a vending machine that can use magic be super cool? Sadly, I have no mana.

s.h.i.+t, now’s not the time for this. Wha- what should I do. If this keeps up I’m going to be destroyed. Isn’t there any way to recover my endurance?

((You can spend Points to heal Endurance))

It works. Just like that, hm. I still have 900 points left so, if I just ignore him he might give up.

As if nature is against me, 3 more humanoid frogs appeared. It picked up that flag really fast. [TL:In j.a.pan what we call cliche is flag]

s.h.i.+- s.h.i.+t this is bad, really bad! One of the newcomers is carrying an axe. If that hits me I don’t think I can survive.

((Damage 2, Endurance decreased by 2))

I know already, so shut up! Wha- what should I do. Isn’t there any good function I can buy?! Pour hot water, roulette, cheer for the customer… Useless! It should be a grand function that can blow away my problems!

At that moment, I saw it. The perfect Function. Even though I don’t have eyes.

> Point 1000000000

Don’t tell me, with this I can transform into a Robot or something? Truly every man’s dream. f.u.c.k, 1 billion points though… you really don’t want me to get it don’t you

It can’t be this, I need to look for something more realistic, something to let me escape this disaster. Faster, faster, something more effective… hmmm, this one seems good.

>

Divine Gift? I should read the description.

>

Ooh, I can choose one for free! I don’t really understand, but it should be something comparable to awesome magic right?! Yo- Yoshhh. This is the way to survival!

>

< visibility="">>

< movement="">>

>

< absorption="">>

< extortion="">>

< sword="" skill="">>

>

>

Oh, there are also Fighting and Sword type skills?! I don’t have arms or legs, though. Someday I will get Transformation so just wait!

Oops, right, it’s not the time for this. I don’t have mana so I can’t use magic. Hmm, I might be able to communicate with telepathy but I have a feeling those frogs don’t have good listening skills. There must be a suitable Divine Gift for us vending machines!

While looking through the list, I saw a Gift that could save me. It’s name is . The effect listed is

((Surrounds the user with a barrier extending 1 meter out. You may choose who can enter or exit))

-This, this is it!!!!!

(( Damage 2, 3, 5 Endurance decreased by 10))

There’s no time left. Divine Barrier, I choose you!

The moment I chose I felt a warm feeling inside me. I’m not sure what happened, but for now, , Activate!

“Gugegogogego!?”

Oh, Humanoid Frog-san got knocked away. Haha, he fell on his a.s.s. I gotta say something or my frustration won’t go away. You really had fun hitting me, didn’t you?

“Please come by again”

Haha, oh man that felt good. It might not understand it though. Humanoid Frog-san seems to have understood my insult and started rus.h.i.+ng toward the barrier but the bluish white light surrounding me blocked his attacks, preventing him from getting any closer.

“If you win, you get another one for free”

I tried to provoke him more. Oh, oh, it seems he’s going berserk and rus.h.i.+ng towards me again. This barrier might be a formidable foe. Every time they attack it never penetrates the barrier and their weapons are easily knocked back.

Hahahahahaha, From now on I am the invincible and unbreakable Vending Machine!

((1 Point has been depleted 1 Point has been depleted 1 Point has been depleted…))

Wai- Wait! My points are being dried up like it’s water in California!! [ED: It actually said being used like drinking water, but I thought this was funnier. Sorry.] What, does this barrier require Points to sustain it? Eh, wait, it- it’s about time for the Frog-sans to go home isn’t it. Please go home.

“Please come back again”

…..Ah.

The attacking got fiercer. I didn’t mean to provoke you again! Nooo, the points are being depleted way too quick. Really, please give up for both of our sakes.


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